Bohemians Are Dangerous Sunday; January 26, 2017 Craig and Ko Keeping Promises

He'd promised Ko a kidnapping and that's exactly what had happened. He drove all the way to the house, just to appear inside the living room through that neat demon trick he frequently forgot about. But not tonight! He very well might've appeared, smoke bombed the livingroom, slapped Zver with a white glove before nabbing Ko and 'demon poofing' outside to get her in the car. Go go go before he busts out the AK! He squawked, cramming the rogue into the front seat before attempting to slide over the front of that little blue Hybrid putter....only to fail horribly and bust his ass. Scrambling into the car, he peeled —unimpressively considering the car was as quiet as could be— out of the driveway. When they were out of threat of a Zver busting a cap in Craig's ass, the ride became much smoother. And much sassier, to be honest. He'd cranked R-E-S-P-E-C-T when it came on the radio and that's exactly what he was doing now. Jazz hands and head bobbing, singing along as he drove, serenading Ko with that sweet sweet Aretha Franklin. Oh, and he was wearing the jeans and t-shirt she'd "snuck" into his closet, too. He could take a hint.

On the off chance that Craig kept good on his word and came to get her, Keirra had put on pants today! They were nothing special, just yoga pants and one of Zver's science-y t-shirts. Sorry, Craig, but she wasn't dressing up when nothing seemed to fit anymore over that damned tumor on her stomach. Her heart might've been racing when they got smoke bombed, but when they appeared outside she began cackling. "Craig Christ! You son of a bitch!" she yelped before she was stuffed into the car, and only cackled more when he busted ass trying to be smooth. She wasn't really scared that Zver would break out the AK, he wasn't stupid. He wouldn't fire at Craig with her in his arms....Buuuut, she did kind of shoot him in the ass, so....Okay, Craig! Drive!

When he blasted that music, she stared over at him with an odd, amused expression like she was trying not to smile. "What the hell is wrong with you?" laughter bubbling out then.

"My mother is a nice lady!" He'd yelped back at her before he'd shut the door to the car once she was in. Driving along, playing that incredible woman on the radio, he looked over with that goofy grin while singing the lines of that song. "WHAT you want! BABY I got it!~ What you need! Do you know I got it"~" His ass wiggled in that seat, a pathetic excuse of shaking his hips before catching his bottom lip between his teeth and bobbing his head from side to side. Thump thump thump. Fingers tapped against the steering wheel. He turned his eyes on her with a raise of a brow, fleeting as he lifted his chin and shook his head, swatting imaginary hair over his shoulder while his real hair flopped in that ridiculous hairdo of his. "I am fabulous, you're just jelly." This is why Craig didn't get women, they just thought he was gay.

Reaching out, he lowered the volume on the song while steering onto another street. "Okay, so here's what we're going to do." Pausing to give her a determined look. "We're going to hold up a bakery. With those." Jutting his thumb toward the back seat, there was a bunch of water guns. "...For the record." Lifting his finger to make a point. "...that is NOT water." Scrunching his face. Flicking his eyes to her, they narrowed as he made his brows dance, his voice lowering as he either looked like he was having a stroke with his chin tucked or he was trying to be serious. "Do you have what it takes, Anita Dick?" Sure, he knew her name. But he liked Anita Dick better. It was pervy and made him giggle.

This was exactly what she needed! It's been hard staying home and abusing the hell out of Zver....Granted, he probably thought she was dead or in a cage somewhere now, unless Craig gave himself away somehow. "ALL I'M ASKIN' IS FOR A LIL RESPECT WHEN I GET HOME!" she belted back, and then cackled lightly as he went about jamming.

Poking her baby bump, she frowned lightly. "I am jelly..." she pouted. Then her attentioned turned to him when he spoke of the game plan. "Will there be muffins?" said the second a bakery came into play...What' She was hungry! Her eyes turned to the squirt guns, and then back to him. She bit back a question and let him finish. "C Dawg," she began and put both her hands on her belly. "I promised I'd get out of the game, I promised to put this life behind me....But dammit....I just want one last muffin! .......I'll do it..."

Eyes on her lap for a moment in that extremely dramatic moment before she began leeeeaaanning over. "...is it peepee?"

That goofy smile spread wide when she belted those lyrics, that laughter that shook his entire torso before bobbing his head like a chicken. Looking at her affectionately when she poked her baby bump, he batted his lashes at her. "But you're my favorite jelly donut. Mhmmmm," Aretha must've infected him with SBWS (Sassy Black Woman Syndrome) as he pursed those lips and rolled his neck in a circle with that hum. Chuckling, he gave her a look after. "...Will there be muffins....ofcoursetherewillbemuffins." He said all in one breath. As if she even asked. He almost looked insulted.

Being called C Dawg had him peering over at her, glancing between her and the road as she gave him that speech. Sighing when she mentioned getting out of the life, he tipped his head in defeat until it popped up to her agreement. "It's just one more job, you got this." As if they were robbing a bank and not just giving a bakery one hell of a heart attack.

Eyeing her when she leaned, that question made the corner of his mouth twitch as he leaned toward her, talking out of the other corner of his mouth. "...There may be peepee....There may be lemon juice...There may be grape soda. Who's to know?" Lifting an index finger to his lips as if it was a secret, he straightened and drove on until....

"Ohhhhhhh! My jaaaaam!" Cranking up the music again, it was Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen.

It's alright, SBW Craig was her favorite Craig. She ran her hand through her hair and looked out the window. "Been a long time since I held a muffin in my hands..." she muttered longingly. A deep breath was taken as if they might not make it out of this alive. "One. More. Job..." she repeated and took in a deep breath.

"Oh man....It's gonna be awesome! I want the one with peepee!" Craig might get hit with friendly fire. She was hyped to cover someone in pee, apparently. When he cranked up the music, she leaned her head back and belted out a, "YASSSSSS!" Propping her feet up on the dashboard, "The muffins can wait...Circle the block until the song ends!"

Taking one hand from the steering wheel, he sniffled and put his hand on her forearm. "You'll hold a muffin again, I won't stop until you do," he promised. "Just. One." He nodded firmly to that, because this was a serious job ahead of them. Muffins and pee guns.

Taking his hand away as he belted out a laugh, he nodded. "You can have the pee, I'll make everything lemony fresh~" Dancing those expressive brows at her, unknowing of the friendly fire ahead of him. Poor shmuck.

Smiling gleefully when she got enthused over the song, he wiggled in his seat to straighten as if preparing him for the ballad. "You got it, boss!" He chirped, tapping his thumbs to the beginning of the song. Only to suddenly get very dramatic and in character for that favorite song. Brows moving, head swaying. "I'm just poooor boy, I've got no sympathy...Little high," lifting his hand in a curve, holding it high. "Little low." Then low. And turned the steering wheel in the direction offset from the bakery route.

Just one" No! One cannot simply eat a single muffin! Keirra crossed her legs at the ankles and got comfortable. Watching Craig sing was probably one of her favorite things, dammit! Everyone else probably got tired of it, but she loved that demon. Dorian took the spot as BFF, but Craig was a close second. Hell, he was creeping up on taking Dorian's place since all the nighteater wanted to do anymore was bang Freya. Stupid Dorian....She raised a brow at him when he began and watched his face trying as hard as she could not to sputter a laugh. Then she shook it away and, "Anyway the wind blows, doesn't really matter to me.....To meee~"

Craig would gladly take Dorian's spot as BFF. Ko was his favorite. She let him be as weird as he was, and didn't tell him to shut the **** up or stop being so weird. She let his freak flag fly, and he loved her for that. As the cords of the song, and Ko's aid pushed him further in that theatrical show, he kept it up and fell into the music. Entertaining was what that prideless Pride demon did. Expressionable as always, hand gestures galore. Serenading, he sang his heart out with those lyrics.

"Gotta leave you aaall behind and fa-ace the truuuuuth," brows furrowed as his lips pursed and a balled voice added to the slight growl in his voice. Craig was gone, folks. As the music poured on, so did he. The moment the piano came into play, his fingers clawed and faced downward like he was playing it with one hand. Shoulders bounced with the tune as he shook his head back and forth. "I see a lit-tle sil-houet-te of a man. Scaramouch, Scaramouch, will you do the Fandango?" Balling his fist, he shook it in the air as those brows dipped low and his chin tucked to deep in his voice. He probably just looked constipated. "Thun-der bolt and light-ning, very very frightening ME!" Looking to Ko, he steeled that oh so serious expression on her and might've Nicholas Caged it. "Gal-i-leo, Gal-i-leo, Gal-i-leo Figaro!" Just to scrunch his shoulders, curls his lips in a weird cat-like expression as his mouth curled like the Grinch. "Fantisticoo-ooo-ooo!"

It was kind of amazing that Ko was such a bitch, and managed to be so many people's favorites! She clapped a hand over her mouth and one over her heart as he began to really get into it. She bit her lip beneath her palm was just watched him for a moment, eyes bugging out at his serious expression. She couldn't help but snort lightly at the faux Nicholas Cage in the driver's seat. She was cackling up until he said the last line, and then got her own srs face going on there. "I'm just a poor boy, nobody loves me..."

Yes, yes....Keirra would throw him a birthday party, with Tittycakes, and ice cream with titty sprinkles....Presents, and....Women. Women he couldn't possibly strike out with.....hookers! So many hookers! Keirra made a face at him when he admitted that it was his pee, and she shook her head slowly. "I gotta say, I'm kinda relieved that you didn't break into a lab and steal a bunch of pee samples..." she admitted with a light shrug. "Hey..." Leaning over. "You got a cigarette...?"

Titty sprinkles" Were they tiny sprinkles that looked like tiddies" He'd probably just giggle at them. .....And even with a hooker, Craig would find a way to strike out with them. It was a talent, really. He looked almost appalled at the idea. "What' No! Around here?" He shook his shoulders as if to brush off the idea. "Handling the strangers piddle of Rhy'Din....sounds like the beginning of an apocalypse movie. I would've tapped your bladder for it, but I didn't want to ruin the surprise," he admitted. Turning those russet brown orbs down to her when she leaned, he made a face at her and gasped. "You. Are. Pregnant. How DARE you— here." Pretending to chew her out with a ferocious —so fierce!— look on his face, he pulled out the pack from his jeans pocket and flipped the top open. He didn't seem to care if she smoked or not. After she took one, he'd light one for himself.

Keirra would find titty sprinkles for him even if she had to go to the darkest, scariest places of the internet for them! When he spoke of tapping her bladder, she shook her head. "If we need to refill the gun, I got you....I pee like every half hour....I kinda peed in your seat a bit when you wrecked," she admitted, picking her pants out of her butt before he started on her with the fake scolding. She gave him a look until he handed over the goods, then she lit up and, well....lit up! Bumming his cigarette and fire, she inhaled deeply and sighed out the smoke. "Hoh....I needed that..." she said, feeling a bit better about the situation now.

That true love right there. Risking getting lost in the vortex of the interwebs for titty sprinkles. He'd appreciate it if he found out about it. "Good, because if I look at another Capri Sun..." He shook his head, puffing out his cheek. "I'ma blow chunks. Just sayin'." He hated that drink now. Crinkling his nose when she told him, he glanced back to Lil' Blue and shook his head. "Sorry, baby.." He muttered to her, only to lean toward Ko to tell her a secret. "Don't tell her, but I've had my eye on a Vespa for a little while now." Pursing his lips, he nodded before straightening to take a heavy drag from his cigarette. "Mm! You and me both," he hummed, twirling the filter between his fingers as he eyed the cigarette for a moment.

"At least it wasn't Sunny D?" she offered with a light half shrug of one of her shoulders. A little purse of her lips, she made a face. That crap was a piss poor excuse for orange juice. It was nasty, plain nasty! The thought of it made her want to blow chunks, so she changed the subject easily riding on the coat tails of the Vespa transition. "I think you'd look cute on one of those....I kinda want one, but I think Dorian would worry too much..." Especially if she got one while she was still preggers. He'd probably try to bubble wrap her. She took another drag and leaned on him while they walked. "You didn't get too far from the bakery did you?"

Holding up his hand as if to silence her, he shook his head violently while making that weird sound with his cheeks in the process. "Brrr-rrr-rr. Don't you spit that acid at me." They were in the same boat with Sunny D. If there was something Craig could hate with the passion of a thousand suns, it was that putrid wannabe orange juice.

Taking another drag before the idea made him upchuck, he looked at her and preened. "I would. I would look cute." Squinting in his rendition of a 'smolder' look, he raked his fingers through that flop of hair. "Downright sexy, baybay." Snickering, he shook his head. "Why' It's not a motorcycle. They don't get that fast." Waving his hand dismissively, "I'll let you drive mine. I'll ride bitch for youuuuu~" He sang.

Only to then give a look around and blink. "I....don't think so..." He wasn't paying attention to the road thanks to the song, who knows! "But I'm sure we can find a bakery up in this bitch with muffins." He had that determined —or constipated— Craig look then.

At least someone shared her hatred of that drink that was anything but blind. She had reasons! Oh yes, she had reasons....She made a face at him as they walked and nodded her head. Smoking the cigarette as she raised an eyebrow to his smoldering look and kept a straight face as she bared her teeth and shook her head. "If I wasn't knocked up with Zver's baby....Nn!!" she acted as if she could just no longer control herself and swatted him right on the ass. "You sexy thang! Mm!" Then to his argument of it not being a motorcycle, she shrugged. "That's Dorian for you, dude....He gets all crazy protective." It's not that I don't trust your driving, it's other people... Uh huh, whatever, mom. "Actually, he might kill you faster than Zver if he finds out you were singing instead of taking care of the precious cargo," she teased him. "You better.....you promised me a muffin...and cake...I intend to have both, because muffins are NOT cakes!" she said in a demanding way.

Sniffing once, he made a show of brushing off his shoulders until she swatted him on the ass and made him jump a bit. "Hey hey hey." He turned on her with a serious expression then. Brows furrowed as he huffed. ".....That the best you got' C'mon." Turning around then, he bent over and put his hands on his knees, arching his back to stick his ass out at her. "If you're going to slap it, then slap it!" The goof even went as far as terribly twerking at her.

Did he criticize the way she slapped asses" She was the best slapper around here, man! Keirra folded her arms and stared him down a moment before busting out laughing at him. "I'm pregnant, and I can twerk my ass better than you can..." she muttered with a disappointed shake of her head. That didn't mean she wasn't playing along. People were stopping and staring as she swatted him like he drew on the wall, man...."Yeah! You like that"! Want s'more"!"

Yeah, he did! What was she gonna— Oh. She was doing something about it. Looking over his shoulder at her, he lifted his brows. "I'm better with my hips than my ass, alright' I'm not used to this position!" Turning his head forward, it wasn't long before he returned to looking over his shoulder with a cheeky expression and a pinky pressed to the corner of his mouth as he waggled his brows. "Orrrr am I!" He yelped, making the usual spectacle of himself with no pride what so ever as strangers watched him get disciplined like a toddler. "Yeah! I like it! I want more! More! — Okay, I lied! No more! Ay!" He squeaked, his ass damn near burning a hole through his jeans from the pelting of her hand as he straightened and rubbed one of the cheeks. "Damn, girl. You keep that pimp hand strong," he sighed dreamily. Finally looking at one of the people staring at them, he cocked one hip out and puckered his lips. "Five dolla make you holla, aye baybay"!" Just to grab the hem of his shirt and hike it up to show of one nipple. Did he put glitter on his chest' ....He might've. He pre-promised Ko nipples. He was going to give her the full deal.

When he rested his hand on her, she didn't stop him, but she refused to look at him for a moment. She didn't speak, she was silent for a little while after he left off, and she took in a deep breath. Pulling out a pack of cigarettes and a lighter that he'd recognize, but not likely feel, she broke her 'two a day' rule this time around. She fitted it to her lips and lit it, before handing them back over with a sigh.

"Craig....You're one of the good ones," she said softly, blowing out smoke as she raised her eyes to him. "It's not...all the time...It's not around you...Or...certain friends of Zver's.." she tried to think. "Not around Hex..." Was she making any sense"

He didn't feel anything off with the baby but he felt a trace of....something. Not necessarily with the baby. But in general. He didn't know how to explain it. And silently cursed himself for being crap at all this.

His eyes ticked to the pack of cigarettes and lighter, brows furrowing as he patted his hand to the pocket they'd been in and was now empty. "Son of a.." He muttered, snickering as he tended to forget she was as quick as she was. "Sneaky," he muttered, taking the pack and working one out with his lips before lighting it and tucked them back into that pocket.

Fetching the filter from his lips after he inhaled, he shook his head but didn't say anything to that. One of the good ones.. He at least gave her the benefit of looking back at her when she looked at him. No, she didn't make much sense in that moment, it was clear he was confused by what she was trying to put off. The red flag crept higher in his mind and he knew she was trying to tell him something but what it was" He had no clue. "...What's 'it' that you're talking about, Ko?" He frowned around the filter.

Yeah, Keirra had quick hands! Could never be too careful around her, but....She didn't actually steal from friends. Their cigarettes" Totally. But when she had her own she'd happily share. "Yeah, what can you do?" she mumbled idley when he called her sneaky and made a bit of a face.

Then he question what 'it' was and Keirra sighed out a breath of smoke. "It....She. She goes away when you're around....Hex, too.." Keirra muttered softly. "But when it's just me and Zver, she's around...and she's so, so angry with him..." Keirra told him, "...and then I get angry with him.." None of it made her not seem crazy when she spoke the words. A soft sigh left her, and she shook her head. "Forget it.."

He didn't answer the idle question she shot at him, he was trying to figure out what the hell she was trying to say. He just knew he felt weird. It was the same when he was around Jynxx, and Belial. He'd found out things about them and he didn't know how to explain it. He had one hell of a 'poop face' going on as he puffed on that cigarette, but it was when Ko mentioned a 'she' that he flicked those dark orbs at her and paused in his walking.

"...She?" Her words swam in his head as he shook his head. This one was going to keep him up at night, for sure.

Returning to walking with her, he made a face when she told him to forget about it. Fat chance, Koko Puff. "Do you know who she is...or what she is?" He crinkled his nose, it was hard to tell if he believed her or was humoring her. But after the **** he'd seen, it was likely the former. He tended to give people the benefit of a doubt. Hell, his dead ex was an Anti-christ that found her way to Heaven. He, of all people, was now a demon.

That's what she was worried about. She was worried that he was thinking she was being paranoid and pregnant. She didn't have these thoughts with Nasya, though, otherwise she might've been thinking the same thing. She shook her head at his question, "No...I don't..." she muttered. "All I know is that Zver did something..." she paused and took a puff of her cigarette. "...something bad to her....and I can hear her in my head....I don't know her name...or...what she is exactly.."

Taking a puff of his own cigarette, the gears were turning in his head but something seemed to be stuck. He made a face then, nodding. "I know he used to..." Be a serial killer" Was a terrible person' "Do some pretty messed up stuff.." Understatement. "Hm.." He hummed, deep in contemplation as he cut her a soft smile. "I'll look into it, Ko. If there's something wrong, we'll figure it out." He squeezed her shoulders with the arm hooked, the smile widening. "I promise." Craig was good for those.

"Now, what do you say we get those muffins and douse some bitches with pee?" Looking forward, he used his cigarette to point to a bakery shop up ahead.

There was no nice way to put it. She knew that. It wasn't as if she didn't know his history, she did. That didn't mean she enjoyed talking about it, or hearing about it. When he trailed off for a moment, she let out a sigh of relief that he made it as clean as he could. The squeeze and promise made her feel a little bit better and she nodded slowly. "Thanks, Craig," she whispered to him and then he made that suggestion. She lifted her gun and snickered, "Let's make them pay for nothing!"

(From live play.)