Topic: Beltane 2011! Meet Your Queenies!

Darien Fenner

Date: 2011-04-27 19:41 EST
http://i738.photobucket.com/albums/xx21/dfenner_photo/521311356_3ef416f175-1.jpg Gossip Columnist: Emmet "The It Man" Bane

Beltane 2011! Meet Your Queenies! April 27, 2011

It's that time again!

Wouldn't you know it, folks" It's already been one year since our Lilliana was crowned Head Queenie, Wolvie and Aly were hitched in the midst of Beltane festivities, and an endless supply of fae wine proved impetus to approximately forty percent of following winter births. How many shotgun weddings will this year bring, I wonder"

With rosy Risa putting the shindig together this year, it's no wonder that Beltane has already gotten a hideously excessive amount of press and publicity. And because we at the gossip column (and Post in general) love Beltane just as much, we've decided to continue our tradition this year and give you a run-down of your potential 2011 queenies. My only question is this: Why wasn't anyone considerate enough to bother to nominate Risa" Her sweat and blood was poured into this project, and you all saw fit just to nominate yourselves! You are all a bunch of thankless heathens! Selfish, thankless heathens! GO BUY HER A CUPCAKE, DANG IT!

Still, we have quite the list this year! We certainly hope that you voted, and make sure to turn out this weekend to see who wins!

Without further ado, I give you the potential queenies of 2011!

Mesteno RhyDin has this androgyny fixation. Or maybe that is the wrong word for it, but there seems to be this weird gender-bending, rule-breaking, just-because-I-can mentality for anything that is taken the least bit seriously in this town. Case in point: Why do people always feel motivated to nominate men for a position that is usually limited to, oh I don't know, the possession of boobs" Not that Mesteno couldn't get boobs and pull them off well, but seriously' don't we have the Green Man for a reason' I guess some people just really like winning contests. Anyway! Our first queenie is probably the one man in RhyDin who can somehow manage to be socially awkward and dangerously charming all at the same time. While we can't pinpoint exactly who might have nominated him (as we figure Mesteno wouldn't ever have gotten nominated unless A. This is his idea of a sick joke, or B. This is someone else's idea of a sick joke), it would definitely make my day to see him win, if only so theoretically Sam would be named Green Man and he somehow got dragged on stage. Mesteno's squeeze does, after all, have the best public presence.

Riley Lo Naturally it can't be a big enormous party unless Mrs. Ex-Constable Hotstuff is somehow the center of attention. And truthfully, I say that with no offense intended. For a while now Riley has been a staple of the gossip columns at the Post, if only because she keeps things hot and devilishly interesting. Mrs. Ex is seeming like much more of competition this year, and while it may have something to do with those" uh' very generous standees, I tend to think that the fact that growing up a little has surely helped. Around this time last year, Riley was pulling a total mef with Ex-Constable Hotstuff (a.k.a. David Lo) and that sullen guy named Daniel, but this time around she's settled and seems much more mature and at home here. Wow. It just struck me how boring that is. Whether or not she wins I definitely hope Mrs. Ex takes a load off at this year's festivities" we need something to write about, dang it!

Rekah Illyriana What's your favorite candy' It doesn't matter. Whatever it is, multiply the sweetness by ten and then you'll get Rekah. And if you don't like candy, then you are lying, are insane, or are probably Harris" all of which probably don't read us seriously, anyway. But what is the most staggering thing about Rekah is that all that sweetness and cupcake-pushing enthusiasm only scratches the surface of what she really is. Did you know she is also a dueling fanatic (And I use the word "fanatic" loosely, seeing as virtually everything Rekah does is fanatical)" She's a surprisingly common face around the venues, both as a caller and an avid swordswoman, and no matter what she always infects everything around her with a powerfully cheery zest for life. She's RhyDin's own horrible and relentless plague of perkiness. She's the leprosy of lightheartedness. The measles of merriment. The hepatitis of happiness. And for just a couple votes, you will have been a part of it!

Lirssa While she isn't necessarily as ultra-perky as Rekah is, Lirssa definitely takes the cake in terms of being popular with the younger people. And for every bit as often Rekah makes an appearance in the venues, Lirssa is present and accounted for in the Inn twice as much. All in all, Lirssa is an utter sweetheart; she never hesitates to leap at the opportunity to help her fellow RhyDinians, be it for charity or purely entertainment purposes. And while we get the feeling she may be doing something pretty serious with her life right now, it certainly hasn't dampened her cheer or friendliness in the least. If she wins this year it'll definitely be interesting to see who she ends up celebrating her victory with, as she has it in with some of RhyDin's most socially influential folk coughAliandFiocough. Put in a good word for us"

Sumias While I don't understand how no-names or low-names can expect to win a popularity contest, I can at least appreciate the underdog effort! What we know about Sumias is unfortunately by rumor only - and that is that while she is actually pretty stunning to look at, she almost seems to have something sinister bubbling beneath the surface. So either she has some serious issues going on, or she's darn good at pretending she does" and to be honest, neither would surprise us. All in all, Sumias seems to be nothing short of mysterious, and while she is most definitely the token elf of the queenie running this year, it wouldn't be a shame to see her out and about more often afterwards!

Elessaria For every bit as token as Sumias might seem to be, Eless is anything but! Purely by the sheer amount of friends and admirers she has, it remains quite obvious that Eless is in a league of her own. After all, we wouldn't have named her RhyDin's Sexiest Woman if she were boring as a bucket of bricks" although, knowing some RhyDinians, a bucket of bricks can be pretty darn entertaining. Whether or not Eless ends up being a shoe-in for this particular honor, it remains blindingly obvious that she is as popular as she is for a reason. Eless doubtlessly goes out of her way to befriend virtually every person in RhyDin, and always seems to be on her best behavior and think kindly of everyone. Add that to the fact that she not only acts but takes special care to look her best, and you have a true winner, crown or no crown. While we expect this one just might be a landslide, even if she doesn't win she will always be a queen in our book!

Mack, Quinn Benoit, and Sam Winchester So blending all three together into one entry maaaaaay perhaps seem a little unfair, but you know what is more unfair" Having to single out one of these cronies for some kind of award business. I suppose what irks me the most is that if one of them wins, I feel like all of them have to win. Mack, Quinn, and Sam (and his brother Dean) all seem to me to fit into the same category: that of sharp, good-looking young folk who don't take any guff from anyone. Around this time last year Quinn was romantically linked with Dean, but these days she has been spending an awful lot of time with some guy named Finn" and honestly, that potential pair to us has so far seemed a little meh. Mack, on the other hand, has been turning all kinds of heads with a complete revamp of her attitude. I don't know what it is, but something about her has changed things around for us. Whether it is because she is showing a part of herself that she hasn't before or that didn't exist before, one thing is certain: Mack is NOT the superficial bimbo some people make her out to be. And while Sam has been MIA for a while, good news comes from the fact that he was nominated - perhaps this means we'll be able to figure out exactly where he's been all this time" If you notice any of our people following him around with a tape recorder at Beltane, don't let him know!

Lola Granger While it is no secret that a certain other Granger has captured my heart forever, Lola is one of the G-clan that is one of the most agreeable. Now that I write it I don't know how I feel about G-clan, though. It sounds almost like an STD. So we'll call them the G-group. But then that sounds like some horrible Christian rock band. I'll come up with something! As it is, luscious Lola is one of the most creative Grangers in RhyDin (and believe you me" there are many), having had a special part in this past Fashion Week with her L/O designer line. From what we've heard she has an' interesting taste in men, but who are we to judge with a temperament like hers" Lola is sweet, considerate of others, and fiercely loyal - especially to her family - so however she chooses to test her waters, I'm sure the testing will be thorough. And if not' Well, they have medication for that.

Lelah Rivka While local starlet Lelah for a while seemed like she had the potential to be a blossoming RhyDin socialite, it seems like these days she is beginning to get a little strung out on RhyDin. Though gorgeous and no doubt incredibly ambitious, our Lelah has been spotted more often than not stressed out over something or another - which begs the question: is she trying to take on too much' And even though she is polite and has a clever sense of humor, there always seems to be something that lovely Lelah is holding back. What dark secrets lurk beneath that shiny, shapely exterior" And will we want to know about them' Nevertheless, Lelah is slowly but surely climbing the popularity ladder these days, which makes her a definite maybe in this year's queenie race - especially given the fact that she has taken it upon herself to do some actual self-promotion. Any press is good press, right'

Fiora Shantalaine I have never seen anyone have such a fast rebound after getting shot. Well" maybe I have, but Fi is a definite surprise nominee this year regardless. I mean' if you got shot and/or maimed in some big huge party recently, wouldn't you take some precautions before making more public appearances in crowded places" I swear, if that woman keeps heading to crazy town like this she is going to have to have her mail forwarded. Still! Whoever nominated fickle Fiora has one wicked sense of humor. For while she's naturally a beautiful woman and a capable businessperson, she does seem to get a little bit shy when she's the total center of attention and often ends up getting stuck or tripping on the line between humility and egotism. Then again, Fi's party-girl persona is a definite plus and quite possibly one of her most likeable attributes, so she may go far!

Gideon Apparently Gideon is one of those fashionable blokes who calls people "luv." But not in that disgustingly annoying and melodramatic, "I will kill myself after you kill yourself, love," kind of way, but more in a "don't worry luv, I'll hold your hair back while you worship the porcelain throne" kind of way' which I'm not sure is much better. From what we've seen he's been in the on-again-off-again company with local starlet Lelah, though things appear to have remained remarkably platonic between them. Honestly that isn't that surprising, as Gideon to us smacks of someone who just got out of something that didn't end too well. Or he did the ending. One or the other. Regardless, he is one interesting fellow and isn't bad looking (if you're into that artsy thing). Plus he earns special points from me for managing to be a smart aleck without coming off as a total jerk. And seeing as he doesn't strike me as the kind of person who would nominate himself and he doesn't seem to have an enormous group of friends, I am very curious to learn just who did!

Rachael Wynter Rachael, on the other hand, does strike me as the kind of queenie who would nominate herself. Either that, or one of the many members of her hedonistic harem of men did it to earn some brownie points before bedtime. Rachael is definitely the strong silent type, so it really makes me wonder how that clenched jaw look can actually be attractive to FOUR dudes. This broad is meffing it hardcore, let me tell you. Word has it she has been seen in the company of Rand, Roderick, Daniel DeAuster, and Dyarhk" and that's when she's not stripping in the middle of the Arena or the Outback. Um' hello' There's this thing called class, and this other thing called clothing. You might want to read up on both of them. I'll jab my eyes out if a mef wins the Beltane crown, but hey' maybe if she accumulates enough mancandy she can secure the right number of votes"

Emlyn Emlyn is living proof that some people never change. Sure, they can act differently, but I tend to be of the opinion that most of the time people end up reverting to their former selves. Case in point, Emlyn has been a swinging pendulum from good girl to bad girl and back again. Lately she seems to be turning things around a little bit in her life" which I'm not sure is a good thing or not just yet. Certainly she's been a bit cheerier, but something rubs me the wrong way about how she's been behaving? and that may or may not have to do with the fact that we hardly ever see her let loose anymore. Then again, it could just be that she is letting loose in more responsible ways. If so, kudos! Cuyler's little cluster has always been notoriously trouble-making, so it's good to see that the corruption did not spread deep into the luscious depths of her bosom' I mean' soul. Because she has such a tempting, curvaceous soul. And such a deliciously firm, shapely' uh' mind. Yes. I could stare at her mind all day.

Gwendolyn Minx I only have one request. If Gwennie ends up being Head Queenie this year, she should do a stage dive. Not because it's in her character, mind you, but I just want to see how far she'd fly. Gwen is probably the most aerodynamic bundle of cuteness that can kill you in two strokes. That's right, folks. Word has it Gwen actually made it to the Final Four in the Duel of Swords Madness this year, which just confirms my theory that the people who do the best in that sports stuff are the really people who have the most fun. And win or lose, I have no doubt that Gwen will make Beltane truly a memorable night! Just, for the love of all things, hide the sugar!

That's all for now, RhyDin. We'll see you at Beltane, and always remember to stay sassy!