Topic: Duel of Swords Madness: Maximius vs. Skid, March 19

Darien Fenner

Date: 2010-03-21 16:26 EST
RhyDin Sports

http://i738.photobucket.com/albums/xx21/dfenner_photo/57423440.jpg Sports Columnist: Peter Pham

Duel of Swords Madness: Maximius vs. Skid, March 19 March 21, 2010

Attention RhyDin:

Recorded copies of the Swords showcase duel between Cassius Gaius Maximius and Skid are now available for purchase at the RhyDin Post for eight dollars or five copper. Please make check or money orders payable to the Post, and include your name and mailing address on the request form. Footage is available in dvd or holodisk form, and includes commentary by everyone's favorite Sports Guy Peter Pham, and retired dueler Chris Reed. Shipping and handling fees not included in price of purchase.

Darien Fenner

Date: 2010-03-21 16:27 EST
- The RhyDin Post's black and gold logo flashes with an epic, orchestrated introduction theme. The logo spirals off the screen, and displays a high-tech news studio with flat screen television sets, and a massive, glossy black desk. Two men sit behind the desk. To the left (Peter Pham) is in his early thirties, of Asian ethnicity, has gelled black hair, and is in a pale gray suit. To the right (Chris Reed) is of Caucasian ethnicity with dark brown hair, is in his late thirties, is wearing a navy suit, and has a vertical scar running down one side of his face. Both men, equipped with headsets, smile at the camera. -

Peter: How's it going, RhyDin" I'm Peter Pham, sports columnist!

Chris: And I'm Chris Reed, and I'm a Pisces!

Peter: Welcome to the Post's continuing coverage of the Duel of Swords Madness.

Chris: Which is way more bloody than bouncing a puny ball around, let me tell you!

Peter: You alright there, Chris"

Chris: I'm all hyped up on energy drinks a pork rinds, Pete! Let's DO this!

Peter: You know those energy drinks make you crash way hard.

Chris: You're crazy. CRAZY! Craaaazy! - Hysterical laughter for no reason. -

Peter: " Wow. Well, RhyDin! Tonight we are extremely excited to bring you this particular piece of Madness, which features two fighters we haven't covered before. Cassius Maximius and Skid" Skid" just Skid, it looks like.

Chris: I'll bet that's an alias for something. You think he's a superhero' I'll bet he's a superhero! - Like a chipmunk in fast-forward mode. -

Peter: Chris" Why don't you go over there while I cover this one"

Chris: No dice, Pete! I've had my eyes on Maximius for a long time now. He's easily on my top five favorite fighters list. Mad skills, that one, and a cool head.

Peter: And Skid"

Chris: Only time I ever really saw him was back when we covered the Tour, and even then it wasn't much! I guess all I can say is I hope he surprises me" for his sake!

Peter: Right, because you're not easily impressed.

Chris: Hey!

Peter: We're still in the first bracket, ladies and gents, so nothing is too terribly crazy just yet'

Chris: - Interrupting. - Are you kidding" This is insane!

Peter: " But Madness is still Madness, so let's jump right in!

- Roll footage Round 1. TH/TH, 1 All. -

Skid: He jerked forward, blade biting into shoulder as he took the counterstrike with a hiss.

Maximius: A deft cant of the wrist slid a bolt-lock away from the gilded maw of a brass scabbard, the hissing sibiliance of a gladius rousing from it's torpor swiftly punctuated by the whoosh of stale air being lacerated in the pursuit of a salute. And instantly, tumescent bicep served as a piston, gladius seeking to rend emaciated flesh in a classic "Roman" thrust. However, the delapidated blade pierced his own flesh, a carmine wedge birthed from the wound.

Chris: Holy crow! These guys don't waste time! I swear, as soon as the caller yelled "fight," Maximius dove in to wound his opponent! Not even a blink!

Peter: I have to give Skid some credit. His proportions first struck me as all wrong for a sport that requires such expert hand-eye coordination. But he's got a surprising amount of grace in the ring. I wonder how long he's been dueling"

Chris: - Still obviously wired. - I don't know, Pete, but boy did he take advantage of that opening! Just one buzz, and BAM! Right in the shoulder! That's almost unfair, right there. Maximius still has to swing his sword for the rest of the match!

- End footage Round 1. Roll footage, Round 2. LC/HC 2 All. -

Maximius: A searing current of pain was cast to the periphery of his mind as he continued to attack, Imperator dipping and swinging low with a fluid motion. However, the blade skimmed across a protruding shoulder blade, eliciting a hiss.

Skid: The Daemon's ragged blade whipped through the air and across shoulder and chest, blood dripping down a thigh as he stepped back, grinning.

Peter: They're just trading shots, now. It looks as though Skid doesn't even mind when he gets cut up. Rather than going defensive, he just takes the hit, and then utilizes the opening that his opponent's maneuver creates. That's" one way of fighting, I suppose.

Chris: It's either gallant and awesome, or completely deranged, Pete.

Peter: Maybe some odd combination of the above"

Chris: Or maybe he just likes to bleed.

Peter: Look at the grace of Maximius" arc, though. He's got excellent form.

Chris: I'm telling you, Pete. Top five.

- End footage Round 2. Roll footage, Round 3. TH/TH 3 All. -

Skid: Skid did not heal, but it only seemed to spark further glee in him as their blades pierced one another again. Stabby stabby oftentimes did, afterall.

Maximius: Well, this was quite the bloodbath, was it not' A trill of pain reverberated across preforated viscera as the duo exchanged blows yet again, enamels gnawing on the plush terrace of a lower lip.

Chris: Whoa! Let's take a look at that again!

- Slow motion, action-replay of the double-lunge. Zoom in on the action of the fighters, where white arrows are drawn along the screen to follow the paths of thrusts into each other. -

Chris: Watch closely here as they just go right past one another.

- Footage is paused right before the blades connect. Zoom in on Cassius" expression. -

Chris: This is a true fighter right here, Pete. At this point, there is no way he doesn't know Skid's blow is coming, but in a split-second decision, he realizes that the only thing he should do is just keep following through with his attack. Not even a blink. This guy's made of steel.

Peter: If he's made of steel, what does that make Skid"

- Zoom-in on Skid, who seems almost euphoric. -

Chris: He's" something I've never heard of, I'm sure.

- End footage Round 3. Roll footage, Round 4. LC/LC 3 All. -

Skid: His blade quite consistently the poorer in quality (against any other blade, at least), the gladius could easily sink a millimeter or two into his own blade. He wrenched it back and laughed. "Close."

Maximius: Settles back after the strike, piercing gaze assessing the slightest fluctuation of the reptilian frame before him.

Peter: And again, I have to give it to a fighter who comes in and actually has some fun with this. I think Skid is growing on me.

Chris: - A little tiredly. - It's a serious sport, Pete, but even serious things need a little humor every now and then.

Peter: You feeling alright there, Chris"

Chris: I'm totally fine. You don't know what you're talking about.

- End footage Round 4. Roll footage, Round 5. HC/TH 4-3 Skid. -

Skid: His laughter twisted into a hiss, as he drove his blade into the Roman's cutting bicep and tore it back again. He'd taken to using both hands as he pulled back. The grin was persistent.

Maximius: And the former centurion's fluid stance sank to a single knee after the strike, pain coloring Mediteranean contours.

Chris: Youch! He walked right into that one. That had to hurt, and I'm willing to bet the pain will stick around with a blade like that. What's that Skid's fighting with' Give me a close-up.

- Zoom-in on Skid's ruined choice of weapon. -

Peter: I wonder if he's trying to make a statement"

Chris: Yeah. Like, "Hey children! Tetanus shots are important!"

Peter: Speaking of messages, we actually have to take a quick break here. Don't go away!

- Blackout. -

Darien Fenner

Date: 2010-03-21 16:27 EST
The screen flashes a fluorescent green, and reads: "The following preview has been approved for all audiences."

A forlorn violin arrangement plays in the background as the camera pans through an overcast day in the RhyDin Marketplace. People blissfully go about their lives along to the melancholy music as a gruff voice-over occurs.

Voice: How much time"

The image fades to a group of no more than twenty men in meeting in some sterile military facility. All of them are wearing different versions of military uniforms. One of them looks up, his face drawn up in consternation. In a hopeless voice, he replies.

Officer 1: He said no more than two weeks, Sir.

A low drum sounds as the screen flashes to what appears to be a human being interrogated in another military facility. He is blonde and good-looking, though his face is expressionless.

The camera drifts to another man in a suit in the first room, gazing out a window with his hands clasped behind his back. In anguish, his head droops, and he rests his forehead against the glass. When he speaks, it becomes apparent that his was the original voice-over.

Suited Man: How did it come to this"

Cacophanous, epic music plays, complete with a full orchestra and extra percussion, as many scenes ensue. Action sequences proceed, revealing RhyDin going through earthquakes, entire buildings toppling, tidal waves crashing over established cities, and killing thousands of people. Helicopters and planes plummet from the skies after a burst of white light, to explode violently upon reaching the ground and consume the greater part of RhyDin City in flames. A female voice sounds as the music fades into something more melancholy, and the scene flashes to a cozy home from the outside at night.

Voice-over: He says he's not from RhyDin. He says he's here to save the world"

Zoom in on a very attractive auburn-haired woman in her mid-twenties, with a tear-streaked face. She looks at her conversation companion and smiles sadly.

Woman: " but not us.

More epic music sounds as scenes play of various action sequences. The woman and alien man race through an underground facility as gunfire rains from all sides. Explosions blast a skyscraper to smithereens as the woman stares up at it from the street in horror. The music suddenly stops as the camera returns to the alien man and woman, who stand in a dim, grungy bathroom as searchlights filter through the window. The woman looks at him teary-eyed.

Woman: Why are you doing this"

Alien: If things keep going the way they're going, RhyDin isn't going to last another century. Therefore, in two weeks, everyone you know will cease to exist.

The woman suddenly squints at him a minute, skeptical.

Woman: Really' Because I've lived through a lot of "judgment days" in my life.

He turns and gazes dramatically at RhyDin's moons. Wind rushes by him as he stares, unblinking, his expression severe. He replies in an imposing tone.

Alien: But this time, there's a much greater chance it will actually happen.

The woman covers her mouth with her hands and tears up.

Woman: Isn't there anything you can do"

Alien: Realistically, yes"

The man's eyes close melodramatically as he lets his head drop. He grasps the sink tightly. He cannot face her, for her fate is sealed. His reply is hardly managed, and no more than a gruff whisper.

Alien: " But I kind of don't feel like it.

Dramatic zoom-in on the woman's shocked face. More action sequences of destruction ensue as a deep, manly movie voice-over occurs.

Voice-Over: On the eve of destruction, only one thing is certain"

The alien and woman watch as Dockside is washed away in a tidal wave.

Voice-Over: And that is" nothing is certain.

The pair are running for their lives through a chaotic New Haven as they are being pursued by the Watch.

Voice-Over: But there is a relatively, somewhat probable chance that RhyDin might possibly perhaps be destroyed"

Dramatic zoom-in on the alien as he boredly explains the odds to the woman.

Alien: It's kind of, like, 50/50.

Voice-Over: -Hurried- Unless one ordinary woman engages a man in a slightly enlightening discussion that makes him change his mind"

Zoom in on the crying woman, pleading with the alien as he's about to blow up a school.

Woman: PLEASE!

The alien stops, strokes his chin, and ponders this.

Voice-Over: This summer, bear witness to what might just be judgment day' or at least something somewhat similar to it' as RhyDin becomes"

Screen flashes to a burning West End, with half of its remains already in ruin.

Voice-Over: Floating Ash.

The words flicker across the screen like a dying flame while the picture itself fades, leaving on the title. The title then disappears, leaving only a "Summer 2010? message. Blackout.

Darien Fenner

Date: 2010-03-21 16:28 EST
- Fade up, back in the studio, where Chris is guzzling another can of some generic energy drink. -

Peter: Hey, RhyDin! Welcome back! Thanks for sticking with us! We left off at a nailbiting score of four-three, with Skid taking the match's first lead. They were head-to-head for a while there, weren't they, Chris"

Chris: WOO! - Crushes the can and tosses it over his shoulder. - Absolutely, Pete! Lots of bloodshed. Massive bloodshed! It was the Colusseum all over again!

Peter: I see what you did there. That's kind of clever, Chris.

Chris: What"

Peter: The Colusseum joke, because one of the fighters is"

- Chris stares blankly at Pete. -

Peter: Nevermind. Let's tune back in and see how this match will turn out. At this point, it's anyone's game.

- Roll footage, Round 6. FDU/SH 4-3 Skid. -

Chris: BOO! What a letdown! What the heck are you trying to stop, Skid" Your opponent's intimidation'

Peter: I'd rather think he's erring on the side of caution. Both competitors have been largely offensive. It was about time they switched their tactics. You know. Keep things fresh.

Chris: At least Maximius looks like he's about to do something. But then he just' doesn't. Yawn!

- End footage Round 6. Roll footage, Round 7. FLP/TH 4 All. -

Maximius: The gladius appeared to segue into a blur of limned steel as it veiled his mein in a rapid, lateral motion, the deceprit blade firmly struck on the flat and sent awry. A pallid tint was cast upon the ridge of his knuckles by the sienna luminescence suffusing the Arena as his fist careened forward in a punch.

Chris: Wow! What a great counter! Let's take a look at that one more time, shall we"

- Slow-motion action-replay of Cassius" deflection and jab. -

Chris: Watch here how Skid goes in straight-on, banking on his speed to seal the deal. Maximius appears to be just a little bit faster, though. Watch his arm. Watch it. Watch it.

- A white circle is drawn around Cassius" elbow, and a white, straight line drawn along his wrist. -

Chris: That is a beautiful sword arm, Pete: Continuous all the way to the hilt. This is the grip of an experienced fighter.

Peter: How so"

Chris: A lot of novices leave the effectiveness of an attack to the sharpness or the shape of a weapon. It's a very unreliable tactic, and leaves their moves unwieldy and their grip infirm. More experienced fighters don't just use the weapon as a tool, but as an extension of themselves. You see here" As much strength and speed is being poured into the blade as, say, Governor Simon would put into one of his signature jabs.

Peter: Let's not get back into fists just yet, Chris.

Chris: - Yawning. - I'm just saying.

- End footage Round 7. Roll footage, Round 8. HC/SH 5-4 Maximius. -

Skid: His blade knocked aside and a fist to the head later, his twisted defense was in the wrong place at the wrong time. He continued to laugh, though. "Wondrous!"

Maximius: The Roman harnessed the momentum of his own strike, hips pivoting in the opposite direction as Imperator swept towards a shoulder.

Peter: I would say going back on the defensive was a poor idea on Skid's part, but personally I would have done the exact same thing. His timing just seems like bad luck. After all, you can't expect to snap a new hit out right after you get nailed in the head. How can you attack when you're seeing stars" Right, Chris" " Chris"

- Camera returns to the studio, where Chris has fallen asleep sitting up. Peter rolls his eyes and shakes him. Chris rouses. -

Chris: - Shouting. - No, Dora! I don't have the map!

Peter: I'm not normally one to say I told you so, but' I told you so.

Chris: - Groaning. - Yeah, yeah. Drinks bad, fights good.

Peter: What did you think of the fight, Chris"

Chris: Very close, which surprises me, given Maximius? level of skill. Then again, I haven't kept my eye on Skid too-too much, so I may have to do just that from now on. One thing's for sure, though, the Madness is looking to be pretty exciting so far.

Peter: On that note, RhyDin, we'd like to thank you all for your correspondence, and encourage you to keep letting us know if there is a Madness duel you would like covered, or you think might be interesting! Unfortunately, the scheduled matches aren't publicly announced, so we've been having our interns do our digging for us.

Chris: Hey. Interns have to do something.

Peter: But that about does it for this installment, ladies and gents! Until next time, I'm Peter Pham.

Chris: And I'm Chris Reed!

Peter: You stay sporty, RhyDin!