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Amelia Enderwood: Satirist
RhyDin Equal Rights Activists Celebrate "Day Pride" July 2, 2011
*Thousands of equal rights activists in RhyDin gathered in the city's center yesterday to celebrate a momentous decision, made by Governor Helston al Amat and her advisory council, to allow an annual citywide "Day Pride" parade as part of the Governor's diversity and solidarity agenda this term.
This proposal for the parade originated from several of the city's day-walking citizens, who argued that they deserved recognition as one, united family under ultraviolet rays.
"For so long we've waited for this," said Bob Weeger, holding a Proliferation of melanocytes is not a choice! sign outside the Great Hall in RhyDin city. "People like us deserve to celebrate something we all have in common."
Added Weeger: "We may have our differences, but I think it's a beautiful thing that we can all stand together in sunlight and not die a horrible, horrible death."
The decision was considered as part of an endeavor made by councilmember Belial to nationally recognize more local holidays worthy of citywide celebration and events. According to a few witnesses present when the proposal was passed, the Government Advisory Council agreed that this was a legislation long overdue.
"I apologize if anyone has been offended," said one of the GAC members who asked not to be identified. "But I can no longer stand idly by while day-walkers are unallowed to get drunk, parade wildly in the streets and disrupt traffic. It is a right that every RhyDinian should have."
The anonymous brown-haired ex-governor GAC member, when asked, claimed that the decision was only stalled for a short amount of time when Governor Helston al Amat fell asleep during the council meeting.
"It took us about ten minutes to bring her up to speed, but once we did she was all for it," said another anonymous, Opal-holding GAC member.
Waves of ordinary citizens rushed the streets outside the Hall once the decision was publicly announced, launching an impromptu parade in preparation for the actual Day Pride parade that would ironically take place that evening.
"Finally RhyDin has recognized that we can't control our normal circadian rhythms," said Rhetta de Lauda, 29. "But just because we operate in the daytime it doesn't make us any less special or human than anyone else."
Incidentally, the Day Pride parade last night was forced to end prematurely when a collection of ravenous vampire covens and werewolves descended on the crowd and drenched sleepy onlookers with their neighbors? blood.
Next year's event is currently on hold.
*Certain facts in the above article have been fabricated for the sake of satire.
RhyDin Equal Rights Activists Celebrate "Day Pride" July 2, 2011
*Thousands of equal rights activists in RhyDin gathered in the city's center yesterday to celebrate a momentous decision, made by Governor Helston al Amat and her advisory council, to allow an annual citywide "Day Pride" parade as part of the Governor's diversity and solidarity agenda this term.
This proposal for the parade originated from several of the city's day-walking citizens, who argued that they deserved recognition as one, united family under ultraviolet rays.
"For so long we've waited for this," said Bob Weeger, holding a Proliferation of melanocytes is not a choice! sign outside the Great Hall in RhyDin city. "People like us deserve to celebrate something we all have in common."
Added Weeger: "We may have our differences, but I think it's a beautiful thing that we can all stand together in sunlight and not die a horrible, horrible death."
The decision was considered as part of an endeavor made by councilmember Belial to nationally recognize more local holidays worthy of citywide celebration and events. According to a few witnesses present when the proposal was passed, the Government Advisory Council agreed that this was a legislation long overdue.
"I apologize if anyone has been offended," said one of the GAC members who asked not to be identified. "But I can no longer stand idly by while day-walkers are unallowed to get drunk, parade wildly in the streets and disrupt traffic. It is a right that every RhyDinian should have."
The anonymous brown-haired ex-governor GAC member, when asked, claimed that the decision was only stalled for a short amount of time when Governor Helston al Amat fell asleep during the council meeting.
"It took us about ten minutes to bring her up to speed, but once we did she was all for it," said another anonymous, Opal-holding GAC member.
Waves of ordinary citizens rushed the streets outside the Hall once the decision was publicly announced, launching an impromptu parade in preparation for the actual Day Pride parade that would ironically take place that evening.
"Finally RhyDin has recognized that we can't control our normal circadian rhythms," said Rhetta de Lauda, 29. "But just because we operate in the daytime it doesn't make us any less special or human than anyone else."
Incidentally, the Day Pride parade last night was forced to end prematurely when a collection of ravenous vampire covens and werewolves descended on the crowd and drenched sleepy onlookers with their neighbors? blood.
Next year's event is currently on hold.
*Certain facts in the above article have been fabricated for the sake of satire.