http://i738.photobucket.com/albums/xx21/dfenner_photo/521311356_3ef416f175-1.jpg
Gossip Columnist: Emmet "The It Man" Bane
Thirty Things to Do for April Fool's March 11, 2011
So April Fool's may be three weeks away, but we at the Post thoroughly encourage mischief. Therefore, we would like to get your creative juices flowing with some casual prank ideas " all in the hopes that when it comes time for actual pranking, you all will positively knock our socks off with the complexity and genius of your hokey, silly, or naughty escapades. Sometimes these things take hardcore planning, so get on it, people! And come April first, we darn well better hear about it!
Note: All of these are purely in jest, but if you want to take them as dares we won't stop you. Hint, hint, hint!
Without further ado, we give you: Thirty Things to Do for April Fool's!
1. Convince everyone in RhyDin to pretend not to know Matt Simon for an entire day. Including his wife.
2. Put up a ransom sign in the RDI: All tabs must be paid, or the booze will be detonated.
3. Seduce a member of the Post. (What' A guy can hope, can't he")
4. Install hidden industrial heaters underneath and around Wyh's rings to freak her out.
5. Invite Kalamere to speak at an annual gay pride parade. If he asks why, start laughing hysterically.
6. Send Tara a baby shower gift. Or better yet, send Tara a baby.
7. Fill Tass's pockets with un-popped popcorn kernels.
8. Cover Riley's wardrobe with cat hair. Likewise, cover Thorne's wardrobe with feathers.
9. Replace all the wands at IAP with similar-looking twigs.
10. Place papier-m"ch' or equally fragile eggs inside Icer's nest.
11. Saw two inches off every chair, stool, and table leg in the Red Dragon Inn and get a mage friend to lower the bar right before Amber's shift. Also, replace every bottle of liquor with a miniature one.
12. Exchange all of Kitty's bras with identical ones that are two sizes too big.
13. Tell Lucien Mallorek you are pregnant with his child and get him to sincerely believe it for two hours.
14. Plant a giant snake skin underneath Z"ev's covers.
15. March into the RhyDin District Courthouse with a lemur under your arm and demand that you both want a divorce.
16. Likewise, march into Riverview or Shambles with a cantaloupe and insist that your "wife" has been having difficulty conceiving.
17. Have a mage friend color all the grapes in Rumors Mill Vineyards blue for a day (or longer!).
18. Design a newspaper issue for ten years from now and present it to Kairee the next time she is present. Keep up the pretense that she has slept through the last ten years.
19. Throw Fio a congratulatory party. Do not specify what this is for; wait for her to make her own deductions.
20. Paper Vinny's hotels with FORECLOSED signs.
21. Install industrial-strength spotlights outside of your vampire friend's windows for when they emerge for the night and decide to draw the shades up.
22. Litter the kitchen with miniature soup pots and spend the rest of the night gleefully telling patrons that The Stew has become a proud parent.
23. Disable the klaxons at all the dueling venues and watch Matt Simon go wide-eyed.
24. Reprogram the auto-caller in a different language. Or better yet, program it to say only naughty things.
25. Walk out of the bathroom in the Red Dragon Inn with chocolate pudding or brownie smeared on your face. Compliment everyone's "exquisite palate."
26. Lock the Arch Mage tower. Or better yet, steal all the Keeper rings and redistribute them to their opposing elements.
27. Convince at least eighteen people to wish G"nort good luck on his challenge. Do not specify what challenge this is.
28. Complete all the Governor's paperwork before his staff arrives in the morning.
29. Every time someone says the word "it," scream. Do not say why.
30. Cover your boots with ketchup and tell all your friends about the awesome new sport of "Gnome Stomping.?
Thirty Things to Do for April Fool's March 11, 2011
So April Fool's may be three weeks away, but we at the Post thoroughly encourage mischief. Therefore, we would like to get your creative juices flowing with some casual prank ideas " all in the hopes that when it comes time for actual pranking, you all will positively knock our socks off with the complexity and genius of your hokey, silly, or naughty escapades. Sometimes these things take hardcore planning, so get on it, people! And come April first, we darn well better hear about it!
Note: All of these are purely in jest, but if you want to take them as dares we won't stop you. Hint, hint, hint!
Without further ado, we give you: Thirty Things to Do for April Fool's!
1. Convince everyone in RhyDin to pretend not to know Matt Simon for an entire day. Including his wife.
2. Put up a ransom sign in the RDI: All tabs must be paid, or the booze will be detonated.
3. Seduce a member of the Post. (What' A guy can hope, can't he")
4. Install hidden industrial heaters underneath and around Wyh's rings to freak her out.
5. Invite Kalamere to speak at an annual gay pride parade. If he asks why, start laughing hysterically.
6. Send Tara a baby shower gift. Or better yet, send Tara a baby.
7. Fill Tass's pockets with un-popped popcorn kernels.
8. Cover Riley's wardrobe with cat hair. Likewise, cover Thorne's wardrobe with feathers.
9. Replace all the wands at IAP with similar-looking twigs.
10. Place papier-m"ch' or equally fragile eggs inside Icer's nest.
11. Saw two inches off every chair, stool, and table leg in the Red Dragon Inn and get a mage friend to lower the bar right before Amber's shift. Also, replace every bottle of liquor with a miniature one.
12. Exchange all of Kitty's bras with identical ones that are two sizes too big.
13. Tell Lucien Mallorek you are pregnant with his child and get him to sincerely believe it for two hours.
14. Plant a giant snake skin underneath Z"ev's covers.
15. March into the RhyDin District Courthouse with a lemur under your arm and demand that you both want a divorce.
16. Likewise, march into Riverview or Shambles with a cantaloupe and insist that your "wife" has been having difficulty conceiving.
17. Have a mage friend color all the grapes in Rumors Mill Vineyards blue for a day (or longer!).
18. Design a newspaper issue for ten years from now and present it to Kairee the next time she is present. Keep up the pretense that she has slept through the last ten years.
19. Throw Fio a congratulatory party. Do not specify what this is for; wait for her to make her own deductions.
20. Paper Vinny's hotels with FORECLOSED signs.
21. Install industrial-strength spotlights outside of your vampire friend's windows for when they emerge for the night and decide to draw the shades up.
22. Litter the kitchen with miniature soup pots and spend the rest of the night gleefully telling patrons that The Stew has become a proud parent.
23. Disable the klaxons at all the dueling venues and watch Matt Simon go wide-eyed.
24. Reprogram the auto-caller in a different language. Or better yet, program it to say only naughty things.
25. Walk out of the bathroom in the Red Dragon Inn with chocolate pudding or brownie smeared on your face. Compliment everyone's "exquisite palate."
26. Lock the Arch Mage tower. Or better yet, steal all the Keeper rings and redistribute them to their opposing elements.
27. Convince at least eighteen people to wish G"nort good luck on his challenge. Do not specify what challenge this is.
28. Complete all the Governor's paperwork before his staff arrives in the morning.
29. Every time someone says the word "it," scream. Do not say why.
30. Cover your boots with ketchup and tell all your friends about the awesome new sport of "Gnome Stomping.?