Sorry, but there's no caged heat prison action here.
Instead, this is for communication via voicemail or text message.
Zan
Date: 2017-09-11 20:04 EST
text to Seph: double date on Friday, be there or be
text to Seph: an octagon. aka lamer than a square.
Zan
Date: 2017-09-12 11:39 EST
text to Clara: testing a new landing system this saturday if you want to join. lmk.
text to Clara: that means "let me know" in cool kid talk.
Clara Wyatt
Date: 2017-09-12 15:07 EST
text to Clara: testing a new landing system this saturday if you want to join. lmk.
text to Clara: that means "let me know" in cool kid talk.
Text to Zan: yeah id totally be dtf (that's down to fly in cool kid talk dont let anyone tell u otherwise)
Text to Zan: so just lmk when Sat and ill be there
Zan
Date: 2017-09-13 11:03 EST
text to Clara: when I first talked to you, I knew you had that DTF look in your eyes
text to Clara: 11:15 AM SAT
Zan
Date: 2017-09-14 23:11 EST
text to Verity: I want your body.
text to Verity: but until I have perfected my scientific experiments to change brains, I will have to settle for sex instead.
Verity
Date: 2017-09-14 23:19 EST
text to Zan : come over
text to Zan : now
Zan
Date: 2017-09-14 23:56 EST
text to Verity: Ok but I demand breakfast in the morning.
text to Verity: I am not a piece of meat .
Verity
Date: 2017-09-15 07:53 EST
text to Zan : are you cooking?
text to Zan : if not, we'll have to go out which requires putting on pants
Zan
Date: 2017-09-20 21:26 EST
text to Verity: want to go this political gala with me?
text to Verity: it's a great excuse to dress up and act like adults.
text to Verity: and then get naked in a broom closet.
Verity
Date: 2017-09-20 21:47 EST
text to Zan : so we can rub elbows with the rhydin elite while they cram their heads up each others asses? ugh
text to Zan : only if there's copious amounts of booze.
Zan
Date: 2017-09-20 22:06 EST
text to Verity: yes but snobby Rich folks donate to NPOs.
text to Verity: especially if they're run by rakishly handsome young men and their mysterious arm candy.
Verity
Date: 2017-09-20 23:54 EST
text to Zan : fiiiiiiiiiiine. the booze stipulation still stands. open bar or i'm out
text to Zan : i'm wearing black. meet me at my place at 6:30?
Zan
Date: 2017-09-21 20:20 EST
text to Verity: deal. and if the food sucks, I'll buy you pizza after.
Zan
Date: 2017-09-28 13:04 EST
text to Clara: hey do you know a woman named Chryrie?
text to Clara: I'm going to meet with her about funding
text to Clara: my goal will be to get you a ship when you're old enough.
Clara Wyatt
Date: 2017-09-28 13:55 EST
text to Clara: hey do you know a woman named Chryrie"
text to Clara: I'm going to meet with her about funding
text to Clara: my goal will be to get you a ship when you're old enough.
Text to Zan: Everyone knows Chryrie. She's a good one to talk to, patron something or other of forsaken ladies or something.
Text to Zan: When is "old enough?" I have a birthday coming up!
Zan
Date: 2017-09-28 14:22 EST
text to Clara: yeah forsaken ladies is half of our rescue client base.
text to Clara: how old are you turning" 17" 18? the truth, not whatever the fake ID says.
Clara Wyatt
Date: 2017-09-28 14:31 EST
text to Clara: yeah forsaken ladies is half of our rescue client base.
text to Clara: how old are you turning" 17" 18? the truth, not whatever the fake ID says.
Text to Zan: Like I said, she's a good one to talk to. Plus the Helstons are loaded.
Text to Zan: I dont need a fake ID because there isnt a legal whatever age here, you know. But I'll be 17 on 11/11
Zan
Date: 2017-09-28 16:08 EST
text to Clara: I'm pretty sure it's legal to marry a mountain goat out here.
text to Clara: still, there's a difference between a legal age and an age which would give investors/clients confidence.
text to Clara: P.S. don't marry a goat. they bite.
Zan
Date: 2017-10-02 15:47 EST
text to Verity: Setting off late tonight for that investor meeting.
text to Verity: Not sure if I'll have reception, so stock up some naked photos for my flight thanksss
Zan
Date: 2017-10-15 20:02 EST
text to Clara: the Helston clan seems open to an investment in expansion.
text to Clara: if you know any plucky young pilots who'd be open to handling their own ship, let me know.
Darcy Angel
Date: 2017-10-16 11:22 EST
Text to Zan I just realized I had your number. I'm planning on strip poker night this weekend. You and Ver are invited! Also invite anyone you want to see naked. I'll send you more details soon!
Clara Wyatt
Date: 2017-10-16 15:24 EST
text to Clara: the Helston clan seems open to an investment in expansion.
text to Clara: if you know any plucky young pilots who'd be open to handling their own ship, let me know.
Text to Zan: Grats yo
Text to Zan: I'll ask around
Zan
Date: 2017-10-16 16:18 EST
text to Darcy: thanks! unfortunately we're both out of town then.
text to Darcy: but feel free to send naked pictures anyway. wouldn't want to miss out.
Zan
Date: 2017-10-28 01:30 EST
text to Verity: drinking at some Halloween party at the docks.
text to Verity: come down here and I'll jack YOUR lanterns
text to Verity: and no that didn't make sense to me either
Verity
Date: 2017-10-28 07:56 EST
text to Zan: damn im sorry i missed it. did it require dressing up"
text to Zan: i'm literally just getting home :
text to Zan: there's a thing at egotrip on halloween tho. wanna be my date?
Zan
Date: 2017-10-28 10:43 EST
text to Verity: it would be my honor
text to Verity: ill even wear whatever cheesy couples costume you want
Verity
Date: 2017-10-28 17:13 EST
text to Zan: those are so lame
text to Zan: what?re we going as?
Zan
Date: 2017-10-28 17:47 EST
text to Verity: You're the creative one, but I want you to pick something so dumb that it'd be embarrassing to wear in public
text to Verity: but strangely hot to wear in bed
Verity
Date: 2017-10-28 21:03 EST
text to Zan: well this is going to be my chance to live out a childhood fantasy then
text to Zan: pick one: blue, green, silver, purple, red, or orange
text to Zan: if you say orange, we're done
Zan
Date: 2017-10-28 21:27 EST
text to Verity: silver
text to Verity: but only bc it's the one color making me hopeful that you don't have a skittles fetish
Verity
Date: 2017-10-28 21:41 EST
text to Zan: blue was the right answer but silver is an acceptable second choice
text to Zan: are you ready for this greatness?
text to Zan: https://cfc.polyvoreimg.com/cgi/img-set/.sig/QnpM5YqA5y3yZjHG6W8ADw/cid/230218461/id/vLXEAUq85xGIDMlUiWqlIQ/size/c600x206.jpg
text to Zan: khakis are required
Zan
Date: 2017-10-28 22:29 EST
text to Verity: yep I totally know what that is...
text to Verity: because I am cool and hip.
text to Verity: and not lying at all.
Verity
Date: 2017-10-28 23:28 EST
text to Zan: i might have to disown you
text to Zan: come over tomorrow. you have homework to do
Zan
Date: 2017-11-14 23:28 EST
text to Clara: happy belated birthday old lady
Zan
Date: 2017-11-14 23:28 EST
text to Verity: is watching Stranger Things alone grounds for a breakup?
Verity
Date: 2017-11-14 23:54 EST
text to Zan: probably. but i've already watched it, so feel free, towel boy
Zan
Date: 2017-11-15 00:08 EST
text to Verity: it took me a few seconds to get that reference but still don't catch the attitude
text to Verity: is this sassy sarcasm Vee or angry sarcasm Vee?
Verity
Date: 2017-11-15 00:36 EST
text to Zan: its idc sarcasm or something
Zan
Date: 2017-11-15 01:00 EST
group text to Verity, Roni: at the coffee shop with Roni (aka burrito butt) and some other folks
group text to Verity, Roni: she's going on record to say that I (Zandrick Ellison) flirt too much but I am known throughout the land as Mr. Monogamy and a role model for boyfriends everywhere
Roni
Date: 2017-11-15 01:17 EST
group text to Zan, Verity: he does flirt like crazy, but i know it's harmless and like...uh
group text to Zan, Verity: never ever seen him touch someone amidst all the flirting
group text to Zan, Verity: he does keep his hands to himself which i think is a good show of character for such a flirt
Zan
Date: 2017-11-16 00:05 EST
text to Verity: the mall's claw machine didn't have a toy ring.
text to Verity: but I did snag you a pretty sweet donkey/bear creature
text to Verity: so if you're NOT madly in love with me after this I don't know what to say.
Verity
Date: 2017-11-16 20:09 EST
text to Zan: breaking promises already i see
Zan
Date: 2017-11-18 16:37 EST
text to Verity: I'll find you a ring somewhere
text to Verity: gollum
Zan
Date: 2017-11-27 19:12 EST
text to Verity: Is Christmas a thing for you?
text to Verity: asking for gift reasons. not religious reasons.
text to Verity: praise the lord
Verity
Date: 2017-11-28 14:10 EST
text to Zan: i'm a religious agnostic but a commercial christmas believer
text to Zan: what do you want for christmas?
Zan
Date: 2017-11-28 16:23 EST
text to Verity: I feel the same way re: christmas
text to Verity: I vote for a weekend trip somewhere to reset
text to Verity: and look for Santa. he owes me quite a lot from childhood
Verity
Date: 2017-11-28 17:12 EST
text to Zan: the only santa i know strips at bachelorette parties on the weekends. but i can give u his number if u want it
text to Zan: i could do the weekend before christmas
Zan
Date: 2017-11-29 11:30 EST
text to Verity: perfect.
text to Verity: the one benefit of dating me is I can fly us somewhere cool.
Zan
Date: 2017-12-13 01:33 EST
text to Verity: re: date auction
text to Verity: do you want me to bid on you? Or does that take the spirit out of it"
text to Verity: I need bf guidance I ain't too bright
Verity
Date: 2017-12-13 08:12 EST
text to Zan: honestly don't care, I'm really just doing this to make Hatsumi feel like less of a spinster
text to Zan: it's mildly mortifying
Zan
Date: 2017-12-13 10:38 EST
text to Verity: Ok I'll throw in a few on you but if some rich secret admirer emerges I'll let him do his thing
text to Verity: and then murder him after the charity check clears
Verity
Date: 2017-12-13 13:26 EST
text to Zan: that may very well be the sweetest thing anyone has ever offered to do for me
Zan
Date: 2017-12-13 21:28 EST
text to Verity: don't think I can make it live but I sent in a bid. fingers crossed.
text to Verity: I figure it's the one time I'll get to pay for sex.
text to Verity: speaking of - steal some chains and a Leia gold bikini if they have them around.
Haiku
Date: 2017-12-13 22:24 EST
Text to Zan: This is Hatsumi. Verity's friend. I've stolen your girl away from you for 1,000 coins. If you're willing pay me that plus a coin extra, I'll release her to you unharmed and untarnished. This is my only offer.
Zan
Date: 2017-12-13 23:01 EST
text to Hatsumi: it's corporate policy not to negotiate with kidnappers or Vee-nappers
text to Hatsumi: but make sure she doesn't get too drunk tonight - for your own good. she may get stockholm syndrome and start getting handsy
Zan
Date: 2018-01-19 00:47 EST
text to Verity: where u at
text to Verity: I'm at the inn
text to Verity: but I'd rather be inn ya
text to Verity: GET IT?!
Verity
Date: 2018-01-19 01:36 EST
text to Zan: come over
text to Zan: door's unlocked
text to Zan: and this isn't a booty call. because i actually like you.
Verity
Date: 2018-01-29 21:41 EST
text to Zan: spring term starts next monday
text to Zan: that obviously means you should come over if you're in town
text to Zan: preferably with chinese
Zan
Date: 2018-01-30 14:46 EST
text to Verity: back now, and at your service.
text to Verity: we need to plump you up and grease up your skin if you're going to pass as a normal student.
Zan
Date: 2018-04-01 17:55 EST
text to Verity: my birthday is in a few weeks and I have some suggestions for what you can get
text to Verity: 1) a pet dragon
text to Verity: 2) a “Zan” tattoo
text to Verity: 3) a tattoo of a dragon who has a “Zan” tattoo
Verity
Date: 2018-04-01 18:11 EST
text to Zan: Tattoos are against my contract
text to Zan: And I think a pet dragon might eat a pet dog
text to Zan: Sure you don't want to re-evaluate?
Zan
Date: 2018-04-01 21:10 EST
text to Verity: contract' shit, am I paying for the girlfriend experience here"
text to Verity: how much do I owe in back pay"
Verity
Date: 2018-04-01 23:06 EST
text to Zan: I meant my contract at work, you nerd
text to Zan: it's a just in case sort of thing
Zan
Date: 2018-04-02 00:10 EST
text to Verity: which is the best uncomfortable face emoji
text to Verity: :shock:
text to Verity: :?"":
text to Verity: :cry:
Verity
Date: 2018-04-02 01:50 EST
text to Zan: They use a generic form contract for everyone.
text to Zan: from the talent to the production team.
text to Zan: stop making faces. jfc.
Zan
Date: 2018-04-02 10:34 EST
text to Verity: okay but I have a new birthday wish
text to Verity: a contract with me that supersedes your contract with them
Verity
Date: 2018-04-02 12:34 EST
text to Zan: Do you offer health/dental/vision/life insurance"
text to Zan: Oh and 401k, stock options, and tuition reimbursement"
Zan
Date: 2018-04-02 13:58 EST
text to Verity: we can live without that
text to Verity: how good could your vision be in the first place?
Verity
Date: 2018-04-02 17:16 EST
text to Zan: pretty bad considering I'm dating you
text to Zan: I'm kidding, that was mean.
text to Zan: but health/dental is pretty much a must
Zan
Date: 2018-04-02 19:14 EST
text to Verity: so is Zanogomy though
text to Verity: that's my term for monogamy and no nudity with others
Verity
Date: 2018-04-02 19:47 EST
text to Zan: You do realize I'm around naked people like....every day right'
text to Zan: monogamy isn't an issue
Zan
Date: 2018-04-02 20:01 EST
text to Verity: yes but you have your clothes on
text to Verity: methinks
Verity
Date: 2018-04-02 20:17 EST
text to Zan: Yeah, I do
text to Zan: wait
text to Zan: are you saying if i modeled too that it'd be a deal breaker?
Zan
Date: 2018-04-02 20:42 EST
text to Verity: I don’t need to be Admiral Ackbar to know this is a trap
text to Verity: but yeah if you’re considering anything more we should talk it through