Topic: Gawd Awful Garden gnomes Rampage part one

Epona · Date: 2007-01-05 13:34 EST

Emerson: ::strolling in, whistling. Toby doffed the fedora from his head and tossed it up onto the upper hook of the coatrack, and then hung up his trenchcoat a bit more sedately:: Icer1978: ::The sound of wings beating could be heARD APPROACHING THE iNN, AND LANDING JUST OFF THE PORCH, SHE SLID UP THE STAIRS, NUGDING THE DOOR OPEN WITH HER SNOUT.:: Epona: ::The centaur filly gallops up to the Inn and practically bursts in, holding two very ugly garden gnomes. One is the drag-queen gnome from last night, it's holding a bannana and a mace. The other os a rambo gnome holding a bologna log:: Icer1978: ::Snorting, she shook out her neck, glancing around the commons.;: = Morpheus has entered the room = Emerson: ::between Icer's sudden rampagaingly lound entrance (heh) and a centaur with lawn gnomes, he had plenty to stare at:: Emerson: .....huh. Epona: ::She set the two hidious figures on the bar, and glances around. She sees Toby and grins:: Morning! ::Then to Icer:: Hi! Emerson: Well howdy there. ::this was new to him, which was a rarity:: Icer1978: ::Yawning, she nodded:; Afternoon Epona, Toby...::stop, blink, and stare at the ugly knomes:: Epona: Did you see the new wagon in the market that sells these things" Emerson: Icer. ::nodding back:: Epona: The proprieter gave me these for helping haul the wagon when his mule went lame. I can't believe people buy them Epona: He syas the line is called "Gawd Awful Garden Gnomes" or some such Emerson: People pay money for those" ::blink:: ...on purpose" Epona: Yeah I saw someone do it Emerson: Are they supposed to ward off evil spirits or something" By sheer horrific appearance" ::squint:: Icer1978: Their hideous.. Epona: I'm not sure....they are hidious Epona: *hideous Emerson: You're gonna scare the kids with those. ::snickering finally:: maybe even some of the adults. Epona: Probably. ::laughing:: Epona: I don't know what he was thinking... Epona: but apparently they are expensive, too Emerson: That kind of ugly doesn't come cheap. ::shaking his head:: Epona: I suppose not....But now I'm stuck with them. What am I gonna do with these things" I don't want them! Epona: They kinda creep me out Icer1978: ::Wandering over, she blinked, poking one of the Gnomes with her snout:: you didn't buy this other one Epona...did you? Emerson: Put them in the beds of people you don't like. :;grinning:: Epona: .....That's a great idea! Epona: I should totally do that Epona: ::Plotting to put ugly gnomes in someone's bed:: Emerson: Could have Elly animate them. They could chase people around. Emerson: ::more snickering:: Epona: They might chase me Emerson: Knowing her, ....yeah, probably. Icer1978: ::Blinks, sending Toby a glare:: I got hit in the head with that thanks to that little witch...::nodding toward the tire laying by her spot.:: Emerson: ::looking. Pause: Emerson: She threw a tire at you? Epona: A tire" Onthe head" Why" Icer1978: No she didn't throw it...it fell when the mistletoe burst into flames ::nod.;: Epona: flaming mistletoe" Icer1978: ::Nodding toward the charred remains still dangling:: she mentioned something about getting stuck in it. Emerson: ...once again I'm reminded why I never come here at night. ::shaking his head:: Icer1978: ::There was then a mischivious grin playing upon her snout.;: perhaps you could give them to Brian.

Epona: ::Eyesing the gnomes and she shudders, almost swearing one winked at her:: Did you see that?"

Icer1978: ::A talon wiggle to Kairee, then she poked the ugly gnome again.::

Epona: ::The pokes gnome almost looks like its looking back at Icer:: Epona: *poked

Epona: ::Did the Gnome wink at Toby' perhaps..:: Epona: ::she doesn't like this and she unslings her handy dandy war hammer::

Epona: These things aint right.... Icer1978: ::Giggles watching Epona:: [ Epona: ::She takes a swing at the Rambo gnome and it dodges":: Holy christ! Epona: <RG> WTF?"" 

Icer1978: Maybe I should try...;:glancing from Epona to the Gnome.::

Epona: Uh go ahead....

Epona · Date: 2007-01-05 13:35 EST

Icer1978: ::She swung her tail toward the crossdressed one, only to be blocked with the bananna, blink.;: Epona: ::The gnome starts swinging it's bologna log around:: <gnome> WTF is wrong with you? I aint goin down without a fight, mutha *^%$#@A! Yeeeah! Epona: ::Backing up, sill holding her warhammer:: This is just wrong....that thing cant be doing this.. Epona: ::The gnome turns to Epona:: <gnome> Says who' some dumb animal chick" Show what you know, nag! nyah nyah! ::The gnome dances rather obscenely::

Epona: uh....::watching the dirty gnome dancing:: Epona: ::she takes another swing and is shocked when drag queen gnome jumps to life as well, and starts grinding with the Rambo gnome:: Epona: I think I'm gonna puke...really..thats sick

Epona: ::Rambo Gnome spanks Drag queen gnome with his bologna log:: Gods....I can't watch this....::Turns away:: Epona: Icer can you freeze them or something?" Please make it stop!! Icer1978: ::Turning away from the dirty gnomes, nodding to Epona, then blinking as a few more slip through the door.:: Perhaps.. [ Epona: ::Sees more gnomes, and the guy wo was selling them all tied up getting dragged in as well:: Holy hell! Icer1978: {S} Epona...are they supposed to be doing that.. Epona: I...Don't think so...That the cart owner they have.. Epona: ::the merchant is squirming and fighting but the gnomes are beating him up for trying to eascape:: Icer, we gotta do something..

Icer1978: What would you suggest' ::already sending her ice toward the nearest approaching gnome.:: charges in warhammer swinging, hooves stomping, and soon Gnomes are swarming all over her:: Crap!! Epona: Freeze them or something! ::Bucking trying to get gnomes off her back::

Icer1978: ::Sending her ice toward a few on Epona, hopefully, she doesn't miss.::

Epona: ::Feels gnomes freezing and falling to the floor where they shatter. Unfortunately she has a coating of ice on her back now too, though it might keep more gnomes off of her:: Gah, COLD!

Epona: ::starts smashing gnomes left and right:: Emerson: Does she know"

Epona: ::stomp swing the hammer kick stomp repeat:: Icer1978: I could have told you that...::kicking a few more gnomes.::

Epona: ::But more and more keep pouring in:: where the hell are they coming from"!"

Knite: ::He walks down the street in drow form carrying a large box that seems to be very akward, as it is a little over 3 feet accross but only a foot high. He shoulders the Inn Door and walks in ::hey all Epona: ::Gnomes swarm Knite almost immediately:: Watch out!!

Icer1978: ::Nod to Knite, randomly smushing a few ugly living Gnomes.:: Epona: ::The hidious things are extra ugly garden gnomes with bad attitudes and they have a hostage too::

Knite: ::frowns:: ah ah...::holds his box up high as he tries to get to the bar to set his box down :: what in the hells is this?"

Epona: Gnomes, start smashin, dude! Epona: ::Stomps a few more into porcalin oblivion:: Knite: ::sets the box down and climbs onto the bar:: Who let the Gnomes out" Emerson: ::point at Epona:: All her fault. :nod:: Epona: ::Gnomes are screaming and waving various "weapons" around. Bannanas, bologna, maces, whips thains, cucumbers, a barbie doll, that kinda thing::

Knite: ::glares at Epona::

Epona: I didn't do anything! They just came to life! how was I supposed to know they were evil?"

Icer1978: It wasn't me.:;sending her tail into the crowd of Gnomes gathering around her feet.::

Epona: *SMASH* ::As Icer's tail does a ton of damage:: Knite: I just picked up this custome carved bowl ...::shakes his head watching them run around:: little buggers would have made tooth picks of it...::kickes one that started to climb on the bar:: Epona: ::gnomes parts a-flyin but the numbers are dwindling:: Epona: ::Keeps smashing:: Epona: ::The merchant has managed to escape in the chaos, and ran away...far far away::

Knite: ::frowns ::okay gnomes gotta go :: said as a cucumber wacks him up side the head:: he label::Icer1978: ::Stomping a few more, as she looked to Toby.::

Knite: ::he puts the box somewhere safe then jumps toward the largest crowd of gnomes and changes into his dragon fomr smashing away:: Emerson: Is that possible" :teasing grin, studying the stuff behind the Epona: ::Soon there is a mess of smashed garden gnomes, and the last handful of survivors ran out screaming "We'll be back!" And so it ends:: Icer1978: ::Smushing the bits and pieces.:: Knite: ::looks around in the garden Gnome massacure of RDI :: what in the world ?"

Icer1978: Don't ask me elder, ask her...::nod toward Epona.;: Epona: I was given some of those things for helping a guy, but they werent alive then I swear it!

Knite: ::he walks back over to the bar and shrinks down to Drow form again:: Garden Gnomes?" Oh dear Epona...rule one...never trust any man baring garden gnomes...never :

Knite · Date: 2007-01-06 12:27 EST

Garden Gnomes

Didn't the humanoids know better. But it was okay, after the first attack he had to wonder. But then a stroke of luck. One of the Garden Gnomes had not made it out. Cowering behind the juice cooler the ancient dragon had found him. The sorry sod of a garden gnome had an engineers cap, a cucumber in one hand and a banana gun in the other. the Gnome was never less ugly. With a word the dragon in drow form touched the Gnome and he froze back into statue state. Knite brought it out and showed Icer, who had just recently fell on him. In drow form the dragon had pretty much crushed him good. But revenge was being plotted. He made sure Icer knew he could multipy them, and reanimate them. The smile the drow wore was pure evil. But then again. There are lots of used for Garden Gnomes.

He did know one thing. This little puppy was getting hidden where no one could get to it. And it for certinly was not going back to his lair. He just got the lair set up and had started decorating.