Topic: Past Regrets

Lilith DeBrough

Date: 2009-07-07 22:14 EST
Lilith made her way between the headstones, fingers trickling over the stone monuments like water over rocks as she passed each one. The stones were cool beneath her touch, but nothing could match the icy glow in her eyes this night. Her normally violet eyes were a troubled storm of gray, turbulent beneath that calm exterior. Her somber footsteps carried her to the edge of the graveyard, where she paused, leaning on the fencing there, letting the small spikes atop the fence press into her forearms. She didn't even notice the trickle of blood that dripped down one of the spikes she carelessly leaned on.

Her head hung, chin to her chest as she gave a heavy sigh, eyes closed to the night beyond. First one tear slipped from beneath her eyelashes, then another, followed by still more. Silently she cried, letting the tears fall to the grass below, where the drops froze into crystals, then faded from sight.

I killed him. Is that what I am' A killer" If this is what I am, I don't want to remember. I don't want any of this. Please" She turned her face upwards and opened her eyes, tears paused on her lashes about to fall. "it was an accident. It was something inside me, but not me. I felt it"

That feeling from her dream pressed in upon her from all sides until she felt short of breath. That surrounding, consuming feeling of rage"of being out of control. Her fingers clenched around the rose stem in her hand, pushing the thorns into her palm. "I didn't even know him," she growled, clenching her teeth. "Why do I give a damn at all?"

His face entered her mind; the shock captured in his eyes as he realized that he was going to die. She felt his neck beneath her hands, the crunch of bone as his spine cracked apart. Lilith looked inwards at the maelstrom raging in her core, and gasped. She gave a jolt and dropped the rose, her hand falling open as if to release his neck, to take it all back.

She turned abruptly to leave, taking a few steps away before pausing to look back at the rose lying in the dirt behind her. "Darkness have mercy on me Damien. I did not mean to be the instrument of your death." Her voice was soft and full of sorrow, a ringing of soft chimes in the night air.

She made her way out of the cemetery on shaky legs, the wounds on her arm and palm healing before she even reached the gate. If only other wounds were so easily healed" And the shadow of the day Will embrace the world in grey

And the sun will set for you

((words in bold by Linkin Park))

Lilith DeBrough

Date: 2009-08-03 20:34 EST
A white rose petal drifted down from Lilith's hand, where three long stemmed white roses were held. Violet hues gazed at the three headstones in front of her. No bodies lay beneath the ground at her feet; no soil had been turned. Pushing her knees into the dirt as she kneeled, Lilith laid a rose in front of each of the stones, eyes reading each in turn.

"Brynn Maris Wolfsbane; Jezebel Rose DeBrough; Lucien Jacob DeBrough."

"A best friend, a sister, and a brother. No wonder I feel so damned alone." A heavy sigh left her lips as she pushed the hair from her face. Eyes were slightly narrowed, but dry, as she took a quick glance around the cemetery. No one in sight. That was good. She hated singing in front of others. But it was a custom to sing the dead to rest in Liuthmel, and the fact that she was in Rhydin wasn't going to stop her from giving her family the same honor they would have had at home.

If Lilith's speaking voice was like distant chimes on the night air, her singing voice was just as hypnotic. Her voice weaved across the cemetery as she sang, dancing around the headstones. She sang not just to her fallen family, but to any departed within the range of her voice. It was a soft song, lilting in melody. It was also the only song that came to mind at the moment.

Her voice was haunting; strung with sorrow lined in a desperate kind of hope. It would enchant any who happened to catch a few stray notes, perhaps even make them cry. All of Lilith's emotion poured into her words, singing her dead family to rest. Mercury eyes were glazed over, seeing nothing as she stared into the distance.

There's no one in town I know You gave us some place to go. I never said thank you for that. I thought I might get one more chance.

What would you think of me now, so lucky, so strong, so proud" I never said thank you for that, now I'll never have a chance.

May angels lead you in. Hear you me my friends. On sleepless roads the sleepless go. May angels lead you in.

Now what would you think of me now, so lucky, so strong, so proud" I never said thank you for that, now I'll never have a chance.

May angels lead you in. Hear you me my friends. On sleepless roads the sleepless go. May angels lead you in.

And if you were with me tonight, I'd sing to you just one more time. A song for a heart so big, god couldn't let it live.

May angels lead you in. Hear you me my friends. On sleepless roads the sleepless go. May angels lead you in.

May angels lead you in. Hear you me my friends. On sleepless roads the sleepless go. May angels lead you in. May angels lead you in.

The last notes of the song rang out against the night air, the only disturbance in the otherwise silent cemetery surrounding her. Cheeks now slick with tears, Lilith got to her feet and drew the small utility knife from its clip on her pants. Sliding the blade against her palm, the skin beneath it split easily, blood welling up in the blade wound. Lilith let her blood spill against each of the headstones in turn, a few droplets for each as she spoke.

"My blood for your rest. Be at peace. Darkness have mercy on you all, and keep you."

Her face was perfectly composed as she returned the knife to its place on her pants. Palm already healed from the wound, Lilith turned and walked slowly away, intending never to return to the graveyard. If she could help it, anyways. For some reason, everything she had cared about during her life had either left her or died. Such a common story, but it never felt common to the person it was happening to.

"Darkness help me, but I am so damn tired of death." Her words were barely a whisper as she pushed through the gate that marked the entrance to the cemetery. Her lips moved with a silent promise to herself: that she would never bury another loved one as a result of murder.