(A huge thank you to Lyra's writer for this wonderful playable.)
"Please Boz! Please Take me up!" Josie pleaded breathlessly as she spun a circle round him in a whirlwind of excitement before catching his arm. They are all so lovely tonight! Just for a few minutes Boz"I won't tell Amos. He went into town with the others." The carnival had shut down for the evening and Josie was begging him to allow her up to the top of the Ferris Wheel before shutting the lights down to look at the stars.
The scarred ride operator resisted, trying to gently extricate his arm away from the whirling dervish of a girl that spun in pirouettes of excitement around him as if he were afraid he might break her if he made the wrong move. The giant of a man thinking he might tear off one of her all too skinny arms like papier-m"ch' wings if he pulled away too quickly or too hard. She'd lost so much weight since she first came there. "I don't know Josie, I ain't supposed to be messin" with Amos" ride. He's old as dirt and I ain't gonna be the reason his ticker gives out cause I got handsy with the Wheel. We ride jocks got a code here and besides, I don't think Isaac would like it. " The usual grit and gravel in his voice found some bit of softness before her tender request was splattered across pavement into disappointment. A wary eye was cast about as if the knife thrower would suddenly make an appearance.
"Please." Josie said softly, like a dove's coo. Her fragility by some miracle had somehow always gone hand in hand with her strength.
Boz sighed, unable to look at the girl's face and tell her no. Her eyes held a kind of raw longing that cut through even his grizzled heart. He'd deal with Amos" wrath later even if Dixie, resident candy flosser and gossip queen opened her yap and squealed on him. "Alright darlin?".get in."
Josie clasped her hands in delight and arched up on dancer's toes to kiss Boz's stubbled cheek as she scrambled into the car. "Thank you and don't forget to shut the lights down when I get to the top!"
*********************** Once Upon a Hospital Room".
The feel of the hospital gown felt so foreign against her skin. It had been awhile since she had been back in this particular costume. Josie thought there must be a better way to allow a soul to preserve their dignity than this dehumanizing fabric that left her back exposed to the chill that laced its way up her spine and left her feeling numb. But these past few months had been a gradual stripping away—this day was no different.
"I'd rather be naked." Josie murmured as she fingered the pale blue gown between fingers. Her Mother's voice carried from outside the room, speaking to the doctor in hushed tones.
"You told me it was in complete remission not one month ago"."
"Re-mission." Josie murmured with a little half smile. A little hiccup of breath between syllables as she refashioned word in a way that felt better to her the same way she played with the energy of the room.
?"abnormality in the cells. It's a bit—we've never seen anything like it. I called a specialist that I know In New York who?"
No more tests. No more. Even now her cells were serving as a million tiny prisms filtering all the residue of sadness, grief, anger and fear in the room. The hospitals were always worse for her. People hung on so tightly and the density was so thick it almost choked her. In the opera house it was easier. People did not hang on so tightly when they were watching or hearing something beautiful. It made it so much easier for them to let go. The frequency of the music helped her with the energy.
Where are you still holding on, Josie"
Josie shut her eyes. She looked for a bit of music to take her away so she could get some of her strength and clarity back. She caught the wave of a song that drifted to her consciousness. She did not want to get caught up in the words going on outside the room. Not their words or their steps and so she shut her eyes and drifted.
"What does that mean?" Her Mother's nerves were fraying outside the room. She could hear it in the vibration of her voice.
I won't dance".
"The training is too rigorous for her body." The doctor went on to explain. "I know it will come as a disappointment, but she needs complete rest so the body has a chance to heal."
Don't ask me.
"She's worked so hard. This company is everything to her. Isn't there something you can?"
I won't dance. Don't ask me.
"I understand this is difficult. Maybe if I speak to her?"
"More like Corpse de Ballet, eh"" One of the shadows given voice, a blending of residues, all the different frequencies and thought forms that somehow managed to pool together in the lungs of the room and rasp a laugh from the corner. It connected with her own internal fears and so she heard them loud and clear— invading the room and her ears like a dark oilspill. "Pretty Girl. Pretty Corpse?" The shadow crooned like a parrot that echoed and reflected back what it heard. "Times up. Tick-Tock."
Josie laughed and shook her head before finishing the song in her head audibly as she opened her eyes and looked into the shadow despite that clutching feeling of being choked. "I won't dance. Monsieur with you." Her voice warbled as she stared down at her feet that were a grotesque sight in the florescent light of the hospital room. Ugly bruises of various shades, torn toenails and raw arches. Pointe shoes covered all manner of sins when wrapped up and secured in the allure of pretty ribbon. Ballet is often brutal on the body. A fact that is easily forgotten through the veil of tulle and so much unearthly beauty of musical composition and form, but there was nothing else that gave her soul so much joy.
"But I recognize myself in you. I remember. Now bring the others and let's be done." Josie extended her hand to the shadow and watched as it shrank back along the wall. Fractals of energy emanated from the extension of her arm as she reached out to it and saw exactly where her own imprints were left.
The shadow began to spin in a dark vortex of interconnected webbing. It extended beyond the corner of the room as the walls melted away and she looked through the portal only to seeing endless patterns in that web that stretched across dimensions and realities. Fear, Despair, Desperation Grief, Guilt, Anger, Shame—the "room" had been a veritable hot spot for some time.
Josie rocked back as a wave of nausea tore through her, a flash of heat that soon cooled to a cold sweat that soaked through her hospital gown.
Josie breathed as the release rocked through her frail form and nearly made her lose control of her bladder. She bit her lip as she waited for the violent tremors to pass, her thighs pressing together as she leaned back against the wall, her fingers fisting in the rough paper that now clung to the backs of her thighs atop her hospital pedestal.
"My heart won't let my feet do things they should do".."
**************
At the top of the Ferris Wheel, Josie's eyes lifted to catch the blazing star that stole across the heavens in a magnificent splendor. Her palms came to rest atop her heart. First the left, followed by the right in a kind of quiet reverence. The star had picked a sacred time after all. This one was special and she felt it acutely through her whole being. She whispered her wish like a shared secret, using that ferris wheel car as a confessional as she slowly rocked back and forth. "I'm ready to go home when I'm called. I think I'm ready. I just don't want Isaac—" Trepidation crept in as her thoughts and attachments hit a tripwire on her brother. Josie sighed as she shook her head and wished for release.
"But if it's not too much"may I have just one more dance??
"Please Boz! Please Take me up!" Josie pleaded breathlessly as she spun a circle round him in a whirlwind of excitement before catching his arm. They are all so lovely tonight! Just for a few minutes Boz"I won't tell Amos. He went into town with the others." The carnival had shut down for the evening and Josie was begging him to allow her up to the top of the Ferris Wheel before shutting the lights down to look at the stars.
The scarred ride operator resisted, trying to gently extricate his arm away from the whirling dervish of a girl that spun in pirouettes of excitement around him as if he were afraid he might break her if he made the wrong move. The giant of a man thinking he might tear off one of her all too skinny arms like papier-m"ch' wings if he pulled away too quickly or too hard. She'd lost so much weight since she first came there. "I don't know Josie, I ain't supposed to be messin" with Amos" ride. He's old as dirt and I ain't gonna be the reason his ticker gives out cause I got handsy with the Wheel. We ride jocks got a code here and besides, I don't think Isaac would like it. " The usual grit and gravel in his voice found some bit of softness before her tender request was splattered across pavement into disappointment. A wary eye was cast about as if the knife thrower would suddenly make an appearance.
"Please." Josie said softly, like a dove's coo. Her fragility by some miracle had somehow always gone hand in hand with her strength.
Boz sighed, unable to look at the girl's face and tell her no. Her eyes held a kind of raw longing that cut through even his grizzled heart. He'd deal with Amos" wrath later even if Dixie, resident candy flosser and gossip queen opened her yap and squealed on him. "Alright darlin?".get in."
Josie clasped her hands in delight and arched up on dancer's toes to kiss Boz's stubbled cheek as she scrambled into the car. "Thank you and don't forget to shut the lights down when I get to the top!"
*********************** Once Upon a Hospital Room".
The feel of the hospital gown felt so foreign against her skin. It had been awhile since she had been back in this particular costume. Josie thought there must be a better way to allow a soul to preserve their dignity than this dehumanizing fabric that left her back exposed to the chill that laced its way up her spine and left her feeling numb. But these past few months had been a gradual stripping away—this day was no different.
"I'd rather be naked." Josie murmured as she fingered the pale blue gown between fingers. Her Mother's voice carried from outside the room, speaking to the doctor in hushed tones.
"You told me it was in complete remission not one month ago"."
"Re-mission." Josie murmured with a little half smile. A little hiccup of breath between syllables as she refashioned word in a way that felt better to her the same way she played with the energy of the room.
?"abnormality in the cells. It's a bit—we've never seen anything like it. I called a specialist that I know In New York who?"
No more tests. No more. Even now her cells were serving as a million tiny prisms filtering all the residue of sadness, grief, anger and fear in the room. The hospitals were always worse for her. People hung on so tightly and the density was so thick it almost choked her. In the opera house it was easier. People did not hang on so tightly when they were watching or hearing something beautiful. It made it so much easier for them to let go. The frequency of the music helped her with the energy.
Where are you still holding on, Josie"
Josie shut her eyes. She looked for a bit of music to take her away so she could get some of her strength and clarity back. She caught the wave of a song that drifted to her consciousness. She did not want to get caught up in the words going on outside the room. Not their words or their steps and so she shut her eyes and drifted.
"What does that mean?" Her Mother's nerves were fraying outside the room. She could hear it in the vibration of her voice.
I won't dance".
"The training is too rigorous for her body." The doctor went on to explain. "I know it will come as a disappointment, but she needs complete rest so the body has a chance to heal."
Don't ask me.
"She's worked so hard. This company is everything to her. Isn't there something you can?"
I won't dance. Don't ask me.
"I understand this is difficult. Maybe if I speak to her?"
"More like Corpse de Ballet, eh"" One of the shadows given voice, a blending of residues, all the different frequencies and thought forms that somehow managed to pool together in the lungs of the room and rasp a laugh from the corner. It connected with her own internal fears and so she heard them loud and clear— invading the room and her ears like a dark oilspill. "Pretty Girl. Pretty Corpse?" The shadow crooned like a parrot that echoed and reflected back what it heard. "Times up. Tick-Tock."
Josie laughed and shook her head before finishing the song in her head audibly as she opened her eyes and looked into the shadow despite that clutching feeling of being choked. "I won't dance. Monsieur with you." Her voice warbled as she stared down at her feet that were a grotesque sight in the florescent light of the hospital room. Ugly bruises of various shades, torn toenails and raw arches. Pointe shoes covered all manner of sins when wrapped up and secured in the allure of pretty ribbon. Ballet is often brutal on the body. A fact that is easily forgotten through the veil of tulle and so much unearthly beauty of musical composition and form, but there was nothing else that gave her soul so much joy.
"But I recognize myself in you. I remember. Now bring the others and let's be done." Josie extended her hand to the shadow and watched as it shrank back along the wall. Fractals of energy emanated from the extension of her arm as she reached out to it and saw exactly where her own imprints were left.
The shadow began to spin in a dark vortex of interconnected webbing. It extended beyond the corner of the room as the walls melted away and she looked through the portal only to seeing endless patterns in that web that stretched across dimensions and realities. Fear, Despair, Desperation Grief, Guilt, Anger, Shame—the "room" had been a veritable hot spot for some time.
Josie rocked back as a wave of nausea tore through her, a flash of heat that soon cooled to a cold sweat that soaked through her hospital gown.
Josie breathed as the release rocked through her frail form and nearly made her lose control of her bladder. She bit her lip as she waited for the violent tremors to pass, her thighs pressing together as she leaned back against the wall, her fingers fisting in the rough paper that now clung to the backs of her thighs atop her hospital pedestal.
"My heart won't let my feet do things they should do".."
**************
At the top of the Ferris Wheel, Josie's eyes lifted to catch the blazing star that stole across the heavens in a magnificent splendor. Her palms came to rest atop her heart. First the left, followed by the right in a kind of quiet reverence. The star had picked a sacred time after all. This one was special and she felt it acutely through her whole being. She whispered her wish like a shared secret, using that ferris wheel car as a confessional as she slowly rocked back and forth. "I'm ready to go home when I'm called. I think I'm ready. I just don't want Isaac—" Trepidation crept in as her thoughts and attachments hit a tripwire on her brother. Josie sighed as she shook her head and wished for release.
"But if it's not too much"may I have just one more dance??