Topic: Forbidden Secret

Alys Beauforte

Date: 2013-06-06 17:31 EST
((Contains material of an adult nature.))

July 2nd, 1613

If there truly was a Hell, Alys thought she was in it. The fifth day of their journey from Monceau to Martel had proved to be the worst yet. Not through weather - which was glorious for spring - nor yet because of the conditions of their travel arrangements, but purely because they had spent the majority of the day passing through towns where their obvious nobility had drawn too much attention to allow her the leisure of stealing too many glances at her escort. They had been careful so far, though after the incident with the runaway horse, their retinue had stayed closer than was entirely comfortable, each of them concerned now that they might not deliver the king's kin safely after all.

Their nights had been spent in inns and taverns, leaving no time or opportunity for even a moment caught alone together, for in such places her ladies slept in the room hired for her, for her own protection. But this evening, this last night before they would arrive in the capital and be forced to take up the dangerous game for real, they were the guests of her mother's friends, the Earl and Lady Glanville. Separate rooms for all in guest quarters; the ladies and men of their retinue set in the servants' wing. Tonight, there might yet be a chance for few stolen hours before all eyes would be upon them once again.

Every day spent in the company of Lady Alys was a strange mix of torment and bliss. That first day after the incident with the palfry, Charles had insisted on her sharing his horse, which only added to his torment. No one had dared question the decision of the new Duke of Lonnare, presuming his actions were due to his concern for the safety of the lady in his care. Though they knew of the past history between them, no one seemed to suspect just what had transpired between them during the short time they'd found themselves alone. Days had passed, and he'd been careful to keep the conversation light and formal between them, his glances casual and brief, though inside he was dying a little more each day.

Each day turned his mood more sullen, and though the changes were small, they were enough for at least Alys to notice. He worried what would happen when they at last arrived at court. Would Will guess them out or would they be able to hide their deception until such a time as it was beneficial to reveal themselves to king and court' This last night was proving hardest of all. Finding himself seated beside Alys during dinner only made it all the harder for him to keep his true feelings at bay and when the talk turned to possible suitors, he had politely excused himself, feigning weariness from the journey.

The slow deterioration of his mood was worrying her, though she had learned in the courts of Edessa and Kediri to keep her thoughts from her expression. Lady Hannah had no idea that her chosen topic of conversation was utterly despised by her friend's charming daughter, and indeed, the earl assumed that the duke had left the table because the women's chattering was annoying him. As much as Alys would have liked to have excused herself soon after, she knew enough of her mother's friendship with Lady Hannah not to give the woman anything to gossip about, retiring more than an hour later to her own room. Even then, she wasn't free, enduring Bess' fluttering about until finally she dismissed her maid with a fond smile. Left alone in her room, all she could do then was wait, listening for the sounds of the house to quiet and settle. Waiting for the safest time to seek out her heart's desire.

The earl would not have been too far off the mark, though it was more the subject matter that was annoying the young duke, rather than the women's chatter. Even when it was subtly suggested that there were certain ladies about the household who would be honored by Charles' company, he only offered a strained smile and a brief apology before excusing himself to retire for the evening, his dinner only half eaten. No one seemed to question his decision, most of the attention given to Alys, rather than the handsome duke in their midst. Sleep, however, was the furthest thing from Charles' mind. A good long ride might have relieved his restlessness, but he couldn't very well go for a ride, now that he'd claimed the need for sleep. He had decided on his own that if things didn't go well for them at court, he would leave for Lonnare at the earliest opportunity. Perhaps a few border skirmishes would help relieve the frustration that was slowly building to crisis proportions.

Though in all great houses there was always someone awake and at work, those busy hands and prying eyes were far from the quarters of the honored guests. As midnight drew on, the house stilled, and Alys knew she had to take this opportunity or regret it through all the months ahead. Rising from her bed, she found her robe by moonlight, padding on bare feet to the door, grateful when it did not creak as it swung open. The hallway beyond was dark, unlit but for the flicker of moonlight from a window at the far end, a window that offered just enough illumination for her to see her way. The hem of her nightgown and robe swept the floor as she crept along, prepared to declare herself a sleepwalker if anyone were to come across her, pausing at the door to Charles' forbidden chamber to listen for a moment. Her hand rose, daring a quiet knock to rouse him to admit her.

As much as he wanted to, he dared not risk seeking her out; though he could have made any excuse to see her, the risk was too great for them both, but he was more worried for her safety than his own. He had been charged with keeping her safe from all sorts of danger, notwithstanding men such as himself, and there was a certain amount of guilt that hung heavy on his heart knowing he had willfully disobeyed the king and placed Alys' honor in question. Still and despite all of this, he found himself regretting none of it, replaying that day over and over in his head, until it was enough to drive him to madness. He had tried to sleep, but sleep would not come, and he was too stubborn to take it upon himself to find relief elsewhere, either in the arms of any number of women who would be more than willing or by his own hand.

When the knock came at the door, it was both unexpected and unwelcome, and he growled softly as he rolled out of bed to see what was wanted of him. No doubt it was one of the servants asking if there was anything His Grace required before the house settled for the night. To say he was surprised when he found the object of his desire standing barefoot outside his door was an understatement.

"What are you doing here" Are you mad?" he whispered, the first words to fall from his lips as he darted a quick glance down the hall to make sure there were no prying eyes hiding in the shadows. He didn't wait for a reply, but took hold of her arm and tugged her into his room, a final glance down the hall before closing the door behind her.

Whatever she might have said in greeting was swept aside by his whispered accusation of insanity, a soft gasp breaking from her lips as he pulled her inside with little care for her comfort, only for the concern that she might have been seen. But Alys found she didn't mind that possessive dominance, knowing as she did that it was born from fear of discovery. She waited until the door was securely closed, her hand rising to pull him down to lips that had been burning for his kiss since they had made their determined promises to one another three days before, hungry to taste him and feel him close once again. "I had to come," she whispered against his lips, stalling herself with another kiss that did nothing to sate her passionate heart. "I can barely stand it, Charles, don't send me back." Another kiss found his lips as she pressed close. "Not yet."

He returned those kisses with equal passion, his mood mellowing at her touch, his hold on her upper arm loosening as he reached around her to bolt the door closed. "You shouldn't be here," he whispered against her lips, warming to her kisses, which did nothing to release his tension, but only made it more difficult to bear. He had no intention of sending her away, though his conscience told him that was the wisest course of action.

"I know," she whispered back to him, and her lips were suddenly curved with a wild grin that threatened to spill laughter from her if she had not known such a sound would draw attention even at this hour. She couldn't help herself; even here, in relative safety, assured of at least a few hours of privacy in the quiet still of the night, the thrill of risking discovery, of being unable to stay away from him, was enough to rouse her past caring as her lips plied his with tender passion. Her dreams had been filled with him, her waking hours torture to be so close and unable to do more than meet his eyes with their secret. "But I could not face another night with only dreams and memories to fill me."

Alys Beauforte

Date: 2013-06-06 17:32 EST
One last night to be together, if only for a short while, before they reached Martel and the King's Court the following day and an uncertain future. I would risk everything to be with you, he thought to himself, not brave enough to speak those words just yet, knowing she felt the same way and fearing for her safety. Dreams of her had haunted his nights, too, leaving him feeling restless and unfulfilled, lonely and longing. He longed to tell her of his feelings once again, but there was no time, and the urgency of his desire prevailed over words of the heart. Instead, his reply came by way of kissing her yet again, pulling her roughly against him and searing her lips with a kiss that conveyed his need and desire far more loudly than words.

Alys moaned as he captured her lips, as he pulled her to him, her own arms curling to wrap with eager need about his shoulders, achingly aware of how very close he was, how overwhelming a simple kiss could be. She had never felt this way, not in all her flirtations, not even in her marriage. No one had ever set her body aflame, nor lingered in her thoughts through interminable days, always on the point of betraying herself yet knowing that to do so could be the end of everything. I can't keep you a secret, her innermost self was screaming as she answered his kiss with her own, as needful and desirous of him as he was of her. I would rather die than not have you. But, like him, these were words she did not have the courage to say, trusting to her touch, her gaze, her kiss, to tell him not to fear. Though court might show her to be gay and bright, the center of her own little knot of admirers, none of them would ever come close to him.

A master at the games of court intrigue, this was one game he did not know how to play, fearing he would give himself away with one brief glance in her direction. Though she might be able to play the part, her bright and gay mood would only turn him more sullen and brooding, jealous of her admirers and wishing to bask in the sunshine of her attention. "I don't know how long I can do this," he admitted, quietly, careful to keep his voice to that of a whisper so that those in the adjoining rooms did not hear and wonder who he was speaking to at such a late hour.

I love you, he whispered the words in his head, though he was not quite sure yet if it was love he was truly feeling or lust. One always wanted what one could not have, and he wasn't sure if it was the forbidden nature of their coupling that had him entranced, or if it was something more. He'd tried to banish her from his thoughts these last few days, but had failed, wanting to taste those sweet lips again and hold her in his arms, if only for a little while. She clung to him, her breath battling his back and forth as their lips parted, as he made a quiet confession that brought a strange, unexpected sting to her heart. Five days was surely not enough time to have attraction turn to love, was it' "Not for long," she heard herself promise him. "Take no lover, make no secret that you want me. Let me play the king and court." Let Christian feel some pity for a friend who seems to love what he cannot have, and watch the romance in his nature influence the decision we will ask him to make. "I was a faithful wife," she whispered to him, her hands clenching in the folds of his shirt. "I am a virtuous widow." Her lips found his, her kiss hard, demanding, as rough in her passion as he was in his own. "I will be your faithful secret."

"You are no longer virtuous, Alys. Not so long as you come to me in the dead of night and share my bed." Were it not her, it might have been someone else, but she had already spoiled him for other women, no matter who they might be or how desirable. In truth, they had not yet shared a bed, but that temptation was one they both knew they would not be able to resist. "He will suspect something is awry, and if he does not, William will most certainly." But that seemed to be her plan. Could it really be that easy' Did he dare hope they could be successful in this? "I swear to you, there will be no other," he promised her vehemently, returning her own vow with one of his own. "I am blind to all women since that day, it seems." He had not missed the admiring glances of other women during dinner, but he had seemed distant, aloof, uninterested, which did not match his reputation one whit.

She countered his correction against her virtue with a single assertion he could not argue against. "I am yours, that is all that matters to me." And in truth, she did not know if her plan would work. She could only hope that the king loved his friend and family dearly enough not to cause misery where he could bring happiness and undying gratitude. Charles' answering vow was enough to make her smile, for she had noticed a few of those admiring glances herself, and indeed, had indulged in a little feminine admiration with Lady Glanville when the men had left them. "Lady Hannah would have invited you to her bed tonight," she smirked, proud to have a lover other women wanted, prouder still that he could insist on his fidelity without being prompted at all. "If I had not told her that I believed you were sharing your own bed with my maid." Amber-flecked eyes sparkled with mischief, showing how she had cleared the way for herself to be here with just one mild comment.

He arched a brow, more surprised at her lie than at the news about Lady Hannah. Though every man wanted to sire sons, he did not wish to sire a line of bastards on every woman who thought she fancied him for a night, and though he'd never been overly cautious about his own reputation, now that he had decided on Alys, he wanted no clandestine entanglements with anyone else. He had to resist the urge to snort in derision, so no one would hear them. "How tongues would wag if they suspected the truth," he remarked bluntly, his eyes roving over her nightgown clad form, which left very little to the imagination, desire flaring to life once again like a spark to flame.

"Let them wag when the truth comes out." She gazed up at him, feeling her flesh warm beneath his gaze, knowing he could see nothing but the suggestion of her slenderness beneath the loose hang of her robe and nightgown, and yet feeling as though he were seeing everything she had. Her hands released his shirt, one smoothing beneath to touch against the heat of his skin as though wishing to leave him in no doubt as to what she wanted. "Gossip cannot hurt us once we have what we want." Her fingers slipped to the single tie at her bosom that held her robe in place, the wide, loose sleeves of her chemise falling back from her wrists as she drew the knot undone. Her gaze never left his, as much warm invitation as demanding fire, wanting to be quenched in the way only he could now manage.

"I only want you," he told her in a voice that could not hide his desire. He pried his eyes away from hers so that he could admire the loveliness that was being revealed before him, knowing he would replay this moment in his head countless times in the days to come, so often it would likely drive him to madness, but he did nothing to stop her. "Alys..." he whispered, her name a sigh against his lips. The door was locked, and even if someone heard, they would not guess who it was that shared his bed, perhaps believing it to be her maid. Come morning, there would be curious and perhaps amused glances his way, but he had been the subject of gossip before, and he was fairly certain no one would guess the truth. He pulled her hand away from the tie at her neck, so that he could savor this task for himself, his fingers easing the fabric away from her shoulders, brushing the soft warmth of her skin beneath his hand.

Strange, that now it should come to revealing herself to him, she should feel a flicker of shyness, uncertain how he would like what he saw, how she would compare with the many others who had warmed his bed in years gone by. Her breath came faster, feeling the tie of her gown come loose beneath his hand, her lips fallen open to let gasping, eager breath flow back and forth as the cloth slipped from her shoulders, pouring down to bunch about her hips and wrists, holding her captive under his possessive eyes. Porcelain pale, with a woman's fullness in all the right places, red-gold hair falling about her face and over her shoulders, she did not know the image she presented to him in that moment. All she knew was the hammering of her heart, helpless in the gripping urge to touch and be touched. To love, and be loved in return.

As far as he was concerned, there was no comparison. Even as yet not unveiled, her beauty far exceeded his expectations and surpassed the beauty of any other he'd ever desired or shared a bed with. She had been pretty as a child, but he had not been old enough to appreciate it then, more interested in learning all the skills necessary in becoming a man who would be worthy of the king's friendship. In that, he had excelled, and only when she was to be sent away to be given to another man in marriage had he realized his mistake in not noticing her sooner. His hand slipped beneath the fabric to touch the swell of flesh beneath his fingers, her heart fluttering like a bird's wing beneath his touch. He leaned close, lips grazing hers before drifting toward the porcelain pale smoothness of a bare shoulder.

Alys Beauforte

Date: 2013-06-06 17:33 EST
The fabric of her gown fell away to fully reveal her loveliness, moonlight falling upon her to outline a graceful hourglass shape, slender hips, a soft swell of breasts, legs he longed to feel clasping his own hips. There was no turning back from this moment. He would risk the executioner's axe if only to kiss her lips and partake of the sweetness her body had to offer. He reached for her hands to draw her away from the gown that had pooled at her hips and guide her toward the bed. No words need be spoken now, their eyes wordlessly communicating their desires of the flesh and longing of shared hearts.

This felt different - not the hurried coupling they had shared in the forest, nor the simmering, bubbling insistence she had thought was hers when he had first drawn her into his room only minutes before. There was something altogether softer in the way he kissed her, the way he gently stripped the cloth from her body and left her naked to his eyes. Her hand slid into his, the urgent demand gone from her for these quieter moments as she stepped forward at his urging, leaving clothing pooled against the floor, drawing their hands wide. Her fingers left his, rising beneath the loose hang of his shirt to drag the cloth up and over his head, shocked to silence by the sheer force of the longing that fizzed through her veins.

Did she really believe herself not to be in love" Or was she trying to protect that last bastion of her heart against the pain of loss if all her plans came to naught' She didn't know, and Goddess help her, she cared too much to be able to stand that uncertainty. As his shirt fell away, she surged close, stifling the tender cry as her skin found his in another kiss more bold than before.

This time was different - unhurried, tender, languid even - not the hurried, frantic coupling they had shared in the forest, but the gentle, loving, selfless caress of a lover who longed to not only share his bed, but his heart. He was no shy lover, his shirt coming away without hesitation, as would his breeches in good time. He was tall and strong in his own right, young and healthy, handsome and physically fit to rival even the king. His lips met hers again with urgent need as he drew her down to his bed, she as soft as a rose petal to his rugged masculinity. The desire of a few days' past came to full fruition, as he was at last able to explore every inch of her, to taste and touch and breathe her in, to memorize all that was Lady Alys, the childhood friend who had become his lover and he swore would soon be his wife.

She seemed small in his arms this time, threatening to appear as untouched as a virgin but for the courage that brought her hands to skim over his skin, confidence rising in her as she sought to be as much a lover to him as he was to her. Three years of marriage had taught her much, and that knowledge came to the fore in caresses that could only come from hands that knew a man's body, lips that wanted to give pleasure as much as take it. Were it not for the necessity of keeping others from hearing too much, she would have cried aloud, summoning all her strength to keep the passionate swell of her voice from rising above a whisper as she wrestled with him in a dance older than time itself.

But she had only known one man, and he had known many women, thereby gaining experience in both giving and receiving pleasure. His lips kept her busy, so much so he muffled any cries of pleasure she might have uttered, at least for a time, until he sought to discover her sweetest secrets with his lips, to taste and touch her in every way possible. He longed to learn everything about her, offer her a lifetime of loving in a single night, knowing it was an impossible task. He would truly ruin her for any other man, as she had ruined him for other women. When at last he took her and claimed her again, it was with both tenderness and wild sense of wanton lust, claiming her for his own once again, imprinting himself upon her body, her mind, and her heart.

She gave him everything, risking once more the chance of gaining a belly in their coupling, refusing to have him leave her until he was spent with pleasure, wrapped close in her arms as she gasped for breath. Some part of her wanted to cry for the fear that this might never be hers to enjoy legitimately, openly, that once again this could be her last opportunity to know him so well. And that softer, sweeter part of her urged her into a tender caress that passed fingertips through his hair, over his back, encouraged her lips to pepper his cheek with loving kisses - yes, loving kisses. Even if she did not wish to admit it, to lay herself open for heartbreak, Alys loved Charles Beauforte after just five days' re-acquaintance, her heart swelling with the emotion she dared not share with him. Not yet.

He took everything she gave and gave her all of himself in return, throwing caution to the wind for the second time in just five days, as taken with her as she was with him. He spoke no words of love, no words at all, though his heart beat only for her. When they were through and their bodies were sated and weary with loving, he held her in his arms, hearts beating together, wrapped in a lovers' embrace, his fingers combing through her curtain of red-gold hair, loath to let her leave him just yet, dreading the days ahead where he would have to maintain his distance and play at a game that might not end the way they both wished.

Even while she dozed - if she dozed - he would hold her close, reluctant to let her go, wishing this love of theirs could go on and on, wondering if this was what it would be like to be wed, to find themselves in each other's embrace night after night. Not even Heaven could be as wonderful as this. "If things do not go well at court, we will leave for Lonnare and be married in secret. If you become pregnant with my child, the king will have no choice but to sanction the marriage. Even if he strips me of my title and my lands, I will not leave you, Alys. I am wholly yours. My fate is in your hands." And my heart.

She couldn't doze, not even for a moment, unwilling to sacrifice any time they had together. Though she was silent, her hands never stilled, her eyes never left his face, committing every part of him to the most secret place in her heart, just in case she were to lose everything. His promise made her heart ache and sing at once, longing for their match to be sanctioned without the need for such deception and secrecy, delighted that they would have each other no matter what might happen at court. Her lips brushed his, soft, tender, sharing that unspoken affection in the dim moonlight. "Would that we did not have to play the game at all," she murmured to him, not even daring to consider the hope that she might already be carrying his child. "I swear to you, Charles, I am yours. No matter what the court gossips will say, don't forget it." Don't forget me.

She'd been a man's wife for three years and no child had come of it, as he'd had countless lovers without any of them resulting in a child. He had no way of knowing if she was barren or if he was incapable of producing an heir, nor did it matter. Perhaps they'd only been lucky that neither of them had yet become entangled with that sort of complication. Perhaps it was the will of the Goddess, without whose favor they would not succeed in this endeavor or any other. There was no way of knowing for sure, but he would offer prayers to the Goddess upon their arrival at court and ask not only for her forgiveness for any transgressions, but for her help in making Alys his wife. "I won't forget," he whispered softly, his pillowed head close to hers, a soft brush of fingertips against her cheek. "How could I ever forget you?"

Her expression softened in a sweet smile so reminiscent of the child she had been, it was impossible not to recall her as she had been five years before, when he had lost his first opportunity to notice the woman she had been becoming under his nose. "It will not be long," she promised him once again, her fingers tangling with his to draw his palm to her lips, pressing a kiss there for him to hold until they could be together again. "But I do not want you to hate me for the things I must do to regain the king's favor once more. A smile is not a promise, Charles. This is my promise." As she gave him those words, she drew his hand to her heart, still wary of speaking the words that would bind her irrevocably to him. But perhaps he would understand what she couldn't yet say.

Alys Beauforte

Date: 2013-06-06 17:34 EST
He met her gaze without wavering, taking her words, her promise to heart, needing to believe her, daring to believe she might feel something more for him than mere lust. He could not deny that something unexpected was blossoming between them. Even if they were both afraid to say the words, their unspoken meaning was clear. He could not hide what he was feeling, not from her. His eyes, his touch, his voice, his kisses spoke for him, telling her of the love that was blossoming in his heart. "You have not lost the king's favor, Alys. You are as much in his favor now as you have ever been, perhaps more for giving yourself to this last marriage, but I will not sit quietly by while he finds a match for you again. If I must, I will approach him myself, and I will tell him of my desire to make you my wife."

"Do not be hasty," she warned, concern flaring in her gaze at his words. "It is not a little thing we are seeking, and you are only newly titled. To ask such a thing too soon might lose you everything." Because the king shared everything with his chancellor, and that chancellor would waste no time in spilling poison into Christian's ear should the question be made too soon. "I won't lose you. I won't let you lose yourself with impatience. On a battlefield, you will see the sword that takes your life; at court, you never know who is armed, or what their weapon might be."

"I will not court another, not even if he demands it of me. I will share no woman's bed until you are my wife. This is my vow," he countered her promise with one of his own, pledging his heart, his soul, his entire being to her, no matter what fate might befall him. Let them all wonder who had stolen his heart. Let them think he had taken a vow of celibacy. It didn't matter. So long as she was his, he would wait for her alone. He pressed a kiss against her brow, realizing with a sinking heart that the night was growing short, and she could not risk being found out and caught in his bed. "You should go, before it is morning," he told her sadly, wishing he could keep her in his bed forever.

Regret soured her heart as he warned her to leave, thinking of the cold sheets she would have to lie in and try to forget his touch to let sleep find her, if only for a few short hours. But he was right; though the dawn was still some time away, the house would begin to rouse soon, servants going about their business to make ready for the day ahead, and even their gossip could cause great harm to them both. She rose from where she lay, her palm smooth against his cheek, eyes longing in the darkness, and forced herself to turn abruptly, sliding from the bed in search of her gown and robe.

He rose with her, not content to lie and watch. He found his own clothing, discarded in disarray upon the floor, along with her own, but it wasn't his own clothing that concerned him. He gathered the fabric of her gown in his hands, slipping it over her head, his hands gently smoothing the fabric over her to cover her bare shoulders and tug the laces to tie them at her neck. He lifted her chin to face him and bent his head to press a tender kiss against her lips, warm and loving, and full of promise.

She swayed into that kiss, her hands tucked firmly within the folds of her robe to keep herself from reaching to touch, from distracting herself from the danger of staying any longer. He was everything she wanted, everything she could have wished for, so close and yet so very far from her grasp. But time would change that, she was certain, the passion of her blood too aflame now to be denied, even at the risk of her own life. "Just a little while," she promised him. I love you. Then, in a flurry of movement, with speed to stop herself from staying, she slipped from his arms and from his chamber, returning to the cold loneliness of her own bed for what little remained of the night. Soon, she promised herself, thinking ahead to the time she hoped for, when there would be no need for secrecy or stolen kisses. Soon.

"I love you," he whispered as she slipped away from him, already feeling lonely without her there with him, without her to share his bed or the longing of his heart. His whispered words were too quiet for her to hear, but he hoped she'd hear him in her heart and remember her promise once they reached court, where it would be even more difficult to hide their feelings, their desire for the other. But he was determined to have her, and if he had to play this game a while longer, then so be it. He would be patient. Just a little longer.

((Ah, if only patience was as easily held to as recommended. Will they be able to keep their secret at court' Only time will tell! Many uberlicious thankidoodles to Charles' player!))