Topic: The Cloud That Passes

Juliana de La Roche

Date: 2015-10-20 11:18 EST
September 23rd, 1614

It was almost three weeks to the day after Joslin de Lonnare had been brought to Darroch Keep that the ever present danger on the borders came into sharp relief. The familiar whistle of warning crossed the keep in the early morning, confining Juliana and Joslin within the keep itself in the hope that the danger would pass them by. To everyone's consternation, however, it did not; a runner came bursting into the main hall, disheveled and close to panicked.

"M'lady! M'lady, there's a Coimbran captain and guard comin' tae the keep!"

Juliana shot up from where she was sitting, her usually rosy complexion pale. "How many?" she asked in a tense voice.

The runner swallowed before he answered. "Six, includin' the captain," he told her. "McCallum's gone out tae greet 'em, but I cannae say how long he can stall fer."

Nodding, Juliana dismissed him, turning to Joslin. "Time for you to discover one of Darroch's secrets, Jos," she warned him. "Get yourself up, come over to the fireplace."

The whistle early that morning had been shrill enough to wake them from sleep, and sleep had eluded them since. Even if they had stayed in their beds, neither could sleep, both of them knowing their good luck was due to run out any day now. The Coimbrans had no way of knowing that the lady of the keep was hiding a Frankish knight, unless there was a spy in their midst, but it couldn't be helped. Jos was slowly healing and regaining his strength, but he wasn't quite strong enough to return to Arindale on his own just yet. Still, he was far more capable after three weeks in Juliana's care than he would have been on his own.

He could only hope the men would give the place a cursory glance and leave without making trouble. Still using a walking stick to help him get around, Jos climbed to his feet, glancing around quickly to make sure he hadn't left anything in plain sight that would point to his presence, and hobbled over to the fireplace as quickly as he could. "My sword," he told her. If there were going to be Coimbrans about, he wasn't going to be completely defenseless, if he could help it.

"Your sword and armor have been in the hidey hole since you arrived," she assured him, her attention on the fireplace. One hand pushed hard at an intricate piece of carving, and the dark wood paneling beside the fireplace swung inward a little. Juliana pushed that as far as it would go, revealing a cramped space beyond, complete with a stand on which Joslin's armor was laid. It would be a tight fit, but once he was in and sat down, he would be well and truly hidden. "There's a knothole in the wood you'll be able to see and hear through if anything happens," she told him. "Get yourself inside, quickly."

He arched a brow, though there was no time to question her about that hiding hole now. She had spoken of it before, but had never shown it to him until now. "But what about you?" he asked, not wanting to leave her unprotected, even if it meant risking his own life.

"They know I'm here," she told him regretfully. "Otherwise I'd be getting in there with you. But someone has to represent the family, and that someone is me." There was fear in her eyes, even if she wasn't going to openly admit to it. She hadn't told Joslin the details of what had happened the last time a Coimbran commander had visited the keep, and she was hoping this captain was not bred in the same vein as that man had been. "They'll not stay long, I'll make sure of it."

He saw the fear in her eyes and didn't blame her, anger swelling inside him at the inability to protect her. He touched her cheek, hoping to reassure her a little, if he could. There wasn't much more he could do than that. "I am right here, and I promise I won't let them hurt you," he told her, knowing he couldn't linger much longer. A quick kiss to her lips and he fit himself into that small space, his heart racing.

She kissed him in return, catching his hand to guide it to a wooden lever set into the wall inside the hole. "That'll let you out, if you've a need," she told him softly, glancing sharply to the door as the sound of hooves in the yard made themselves known. "I must go. Be safe, Jos." Scrambling to draw the door closed, she rushed to make his bed seem as though no one had slept in it, checking the room for any sign of her guest. She was just about done when young Laurel came to the bedroom door.

"M'lady, there's a Captain Owens below, calling for you," the girl said shakily.

Juliana reached out to hug the young maid. "I'll go, Laurel," she assured her. "You hide yourself, you hear me? Don't come out unless your ma or I tell you to. Now go." Ushering the girl away, she cast a look back toward the panel she knew Jos was hidden behind, nodded once, and slipped from sight herself.

If anything happens, Joslin's mind echoed, as he slowly turned around in the cramped space so that he could see and hear as much as he could from through the small knothole in the wood. The hiding place didn't afford him much room, and the hole in the wood didn't allow him much of a view, but it was too late to argue. He was not sure if he was well enough yet to take on six healthy Coimbran soldiers on his own, and even if he did, there would be hell to pay afterwards when the Coimbrans found out. No, he had no choice but to hide, even if it felt wrong in his heart to hide like a coward while the woman he had come to love these past weeks faced them alone. If they harmed one hair on her head ....Joslin tried not to think about that; it only made him more angry.

It was a good hour or more before Jos saw Juliana again, and when he did, it was not in the best of circumstances. The bedroom door burst open violently, and through the limited range of the knothole before his eye, he saw Juliana pushed heavily into the room. Her braid was half undone, the sleeve of her dress torn, and yet, despite her obvious tears of fright, she pushed herself to stand upright and face the man who marched in after her. This Coimbran captain seemed cut of the same cloth as the last who had come to Darroch, with no need to threaten when he could simply carry through his wishes. As Juliana raised the candlestick to strike him, he backhanded her almost casually with such force that the young borderwoman staggered back, falling hard against the carven end of the bed. Before she could recover herself, she was thrown bodily onto that bed, and so began a wrestling match with her legs and skirts that had her shrieking for help.

Joslin had always considered himself to be a reasonable man. He was a Knight of Francia and as such, prided himself on conducting himself with the utmost honor and integrity, but when he both heard and saw what the Coimbran captain intended to do, the blood in his veins came to a boil, raging with fury and hatred, and without a second thought for his own safety, he grabbed hold of his sword and pushed the wooden lever that would slide the door of the hidey hole open to release him. He didn't even bother to give the man time to react, roaring with rage as he bodily grabbed hold of the man and threw him off Juliana.

The captain was so intent upon winning his way with Juliana that he didn't hear the panel sliding back, or the furious footsteps behind him. The first he knew of anyone else in the room was strong hands on him, throwing him bodily away from the weeping woman on the bed. "What the - " He rolled to his back, looking up at the intruder, and a vicious scowl crossed his face. "Frankish scum. We'll burn the place for this!"

"Over my dead body," Joslin muttered, knowing full well that was what the Coimbran captain intended. It was more a challenge than a threat, though. The Coimbrans had killed his friends dishonorably with their ambush, and now one of them was threatening his beloved with the intention of forcing himself upon her. No matter what happened to him, Joslin could not stand by and do nothing while the man took advantage of her and her people. "Take up your sword and fight like a man, rather than like the coward you are," he challenged.

Juliana de La Roche

Date: 2015-10-20 11:20 EST
"I am the coward when you were the one hiding," the captain sneered, drawing himself onto his feet to draw his sword. The blade was horribly familiar - it had been taken from one of Joslin's own party when they had been ambushed. It seemed as though here was ample opportunity for a little revenge. As the captain roared, swinging his sword at Jos, Juliana cried out, frightened for the man she was falling in love with but utterly helpless to intervene.

"And you are the one brutalizing a defenseless woman," Joslin countered, recognizing the blade as having belonged to one of his friend as soon as it was drawn. "A coward and a thief, I see," he added, gritting his teeth and lifting his sword to defend himself as the captain swung the blade toward at him. "Was it you who led the ambush that killed my friends?" he asked, as he planted his feet and parried the man's swing.

The captain snarled as his blow was parried, the close quarters of the bed chamber making it difficult for either man to take ground or give it. "Put down some dogs in the forest," he spat at Joslin. "Should have finished the job then. Best to do it now!" Another heavy swing of his sword came sweeping toward the unarmored knight, as the captain charged him.

There wasn't much room to maneuver, but Joslin somehow managed to sidestep the man just before the sword found purchase, slicing through Joslin's tunic, staining his back with a thin line of blood. So, the Coimbran had claimed first blood, but Joslin was determined to see him dead first. "Juliana!" he called as he spun back around. "Get out of here!" he ordered, slashing his sword back at his enemy and positioning himself between the Coimbran and his beloved, the door behind him.

Scrambling off the bed, Juliana did exactly as she was told, rushing to get out through the door as the captain swung yet again. They could hear her screaming for help as she ran headlong down the stairs, and the clamor of feet rushing back toward them in response. From outside the window came the sound of men taken by surprise, as the men and women of Darroch caught on to what was happening and decided to deliver a little rough justice of their own.

Joslin smiled to hear her screaming for help, as well as the sounds of an uprising from outside the window. "It seems you've worn out your welcome here, Captain," Joslin taunted him, his eyes flashing with rage and the desire for revenge. With renewed vigor, he roared forward, charging toward the man with his sword held high to bring it down in fury against the man's defenses.

And there was his opponent's weakness. Coimbran steel was not as dense as Frankish, and the sword the man had stolen was heavier than he was used to. He couldn't raise it in time to defend himself against the blow that fell heavily on him, roaring in agony as Joslin's blade cut deep into his shoulder, hard enough to break the bone it slammed against.

Joslin recognized the opportunity left by the captain's mistake, and though under normal circumstances, he might have offered terms of surrender, he could not afford to do so in these circumstances - not with Juliana's honor at stake and her life in danger. No, he could not allow this man to go free, nor any of the men who'd accompanied him. "I shall pray for your soul," he told him, the only kindness he could offer, before thrusting his sword through the wounded man's chest to finish him.

Already bleeding to death, there was no defense the captain could mount as he clawed at the blade thrust into his chest. Blood blossomed from his mouth, bubbling with his last breaths as he fell heavily, staining the rug with the darkness of his life. A crash from the hallway alerted Jos to those coming to his rescue, and he was treated to the sight of McCallum the bailiff, Stanley the smith, and little Jock the page, all attempting to get through the narrow doorway at the same time, armed variously with a sword, a heavy hammer, and the poker from the hearth in the kitchen.

But they were too late - there was no need. A Knight of Francia had defeated the Coimbran Captain, defended his lady love's honor, and avenged his fallen comrades, but he took no joy in it. There was never any joy in death, even that of an enemy. Joslin stumbled back, crashing into a table, stumbling to his knees, all his strength spent, but he was alive and Juliana was alive, and that was all that mattered. "What of the others?" he asked as the men pushed through the doorway.

With a judicious use of elbows, McCallum managed to be the first one through the door. "Giving up as we speak, sir," he told the knight. "We'll have 'em in the stocks by end of an hour." Glancing over his shoulder, he scowled at his companions. "Stanley, come and help Sir Joslin find his feet in another chamber. Jock, go and fetch the lady."

As the little boy went running back down the stairs, McCallum sheathed his sword and bent to help Stanley get Jos back onto his feet. "You've done us well, sir," the bailiff said approvingly. "You'll no see us ungrateful."

Joslin wondered if they'd needed him at all, a weary smile on his face, but he was relieved the others had finally decided to stand up for themselves and for what was right. And if he hadn't come forward to defend Juliana" He didn't want to think what might have happened then. "These lands belong to you and your kith and kin," Joslin said as they helped him to his feet. "Not to the Coimbrans. It's time you defend it."

"If we'd soldiers, we would, sir," McCallum pointed out to him. "Our fighting men were took tae the war. We'll work summat oot. Now come along, sir, easy does it." Between them, he and the smith got Joslin into the next bedroom along, sitting him in a chair rather than on the bed.

A few moments later, Juliana's voice was discernible from the hallway, with little Jock telling her firmly not to go into the original bed chamber.

It was awkward at best. Though he'd only taken minor wounds in his fight with the Coimbran, Joslin was still healing from the wounds he suffered three weeks past, and his strength had not yet returned in its entirety. "I think you will find His Grace more than willing to help you defend these lands," Joslin said, though he could make no promises until he returned to Arindale and spoke with the duke. He winced a little as the men got him into the chair, but this was nothing compared to past hurts, and he was more concerned with Juliana's well-being than his own.

"Aye, t'would be a blessing, sir." Happy that the knight was as settled as possible, McCallum nodded to him, dismissing the smith as he headed for the door. Both men stepped aside as Juliana came into view, a little wild around the eyes.

"Jos" Oh Goddess, Jos, you're hurt!"

Jos heard Juliana's voice in the hallway and smiled with relief, lifting a hand to reassure her as the men departed and she came into view. "I'm fine, Jules. Just a little winded," he assured her. Whatever wounds and bumps and bruises he'd received were nothing compared to the man in the other room - and to the wounds he'd suffered three weeks past when the Coimbrans had left him for dead. "What of you? Did he hurt you?" he asked, his face full of equal concern for her.

She was definitely looking a little ragged herself. Now he had the chance to look properly, he would be able to guess how she had ended up in such a state. Quite apart from the red-rimmed eyes, her hair was disheveled, as though a hand had gripped her hard and dragged her by it; the sleeve and bodice of her gown were torn; a bruise was coming up on her jaw where the man had hit her. And that was just what Jos could see; he'd witnessed her fall heavily twice, once to the floor and once against the mahogany carved bed. It didn't take a genius to guess that bruises would rise from those impacts as well. And yet despite all of that, she was more concerned with him, calling for her basket as she entered the room. "I'm well enough," she told him - not exactly a lie, but not the whole truth by any means. "You're bleeding, Jos."

Juliana de La Roche

Date: 2015-10-20 11:21 EST
Jos frowned up at her as she entered the room. He'd seen and heard enough to know she wasn't being entirely truthful, and yet, he didn't want to argue with her or remind her of what the man had done - or tried to do. It wasn't the first time he'd been wounded, and it likely wounded by the last. "You're shaking, mon coeur," he told her, reaching for her hands, though he did not trust himself to get to his feet.

To her credit, she didn't even try to argue that point, sinking into a seat close beside him as he took her hands between his. "I was frightened," she admitted to him softly. "The last time a man handled me that way, my brothers and father were here to stop him. There was no one below but the women, and they couldn't have done anything. T'was sheer dumb luck that he chose that room."

Was it sheer dumb luck, or was it something more than that' He was starting to think none of this had been luck, but he didn't really believe in fate either. No, as far as Joslin was concerned, there was a greater hand in all this, a greater power who was guiding their destinies. Why his men had to have died, he didn't know, but he knew that their sacrifice had led him here. He didn't want to debate that now though; he'd think on it later. He took her face between his hands, searching her eyes, still a little wild with fear. "I would have stopped him ....somehow. I will never let anyone hurt you ever again, Juliana. This I swear ....never again," he told her solemnly, meeting her gaze.

She leaned toward him, comforted by his touch as he solemnly made his vow. "I believe you," she answered him softly, her hand rising to brush over his heart. "Jos ....I know I said that I didn't love you. I was wrong. When I saw him attack you, I knew I couldn't bear it to see you harmed again. I love you, Joslin."

"My sweet Juliana," he whispered, a soft smile on his face, touched by her words. He'd already guessed that she loved him, despite her denial. The fact was that he loved her, too, and had for some time - perhaps right from the moment he'd first woken to her lovely face hovering close to his and looking so concerned for his well-being. "Je t'aime, Juliana," he told her softly. "I love you, too." Despite the bumps and bruises and aches they both had suffered, he leaned closer and touched his lips to hers, as tenderly and gently as ever, wordlessly sharing his heart with the woman he loved.

She was almost in tears as he kissed her, not just from the fear and pain, but from the surge of happiness that rose in her heart as he shared his love for her. Her fingers touched softly against his jaw as he kissed her, caressing his cheek as she drew back, blue eyes glistening as she smiled at him. "You should let me look at your back," she told him, ever practical, even in the face of the declaration they had shared. "I'll not have you suffering for my sake."

He very gingerly touched the place on her face where the Coimbran bastard had struck her, noting the swelling with a frown and knowing she was going to have a bruise to show for it. "He hurt you," he remarked, a concerned look on his face. Now that the Coimbran threat had passed, his hands were shaking a little, not out of fear so much as out of shock and pain and worry for her safety.

"He would have done worse without you there to protect me," she reminded him gently, shaking her head to dismiss the bruises she bore. A tentative knock at the door announced Laurel's arrival, not only with Juliana's basket, but with fresh clothing for them both. "Thank you, Laurel. Tell McCallum we'll wait for my father's judgment on the men who survived. The dead can be burned." As the young girl left, quieter than Jos had seen her before, Juliana opened her basket. "I don't think he hurt you badly, but I should like to clean the cut."

"I've had worse, you know," he teased, a faint smirk on his face despite the circumstances. Of course, she'd know he had worse - she was the one who had patched him up after the Coimbrans had left him for dead. "That's going to bruise," he remarked, the smirk turning to a frown. It was too bad it hadn't snowed yet. He could make a cold pack for her.

Her hand rose to touch the bruise on her jaw. "It's over the bone," she told him softly. "The bruise won't last." Sitting upright, she looked him over. "Will ....Do you need help getting your tunic and shirt off?" she asked him a little shyly.

The frown lingered on his face, more concerned for her than himself, though it appeared she'd only suffered bumps and bruises. He didn't even want to think about what the Coimbran scum might have done to her if he hadn't been there to stop him. "Never again, cheri. I will not let anyone ever hurt you again," he assured her again, with a tender caress of her cheek. He smiled a little as he sensed her shyness, though she had seen him undressed before now. "I think I can manage it. Are you turning shy on me now that we are promised to each other?"

She blushed a little, the color returning to her pale cheeks as he smiled at her. "A wee bit, perhaps," she admitted. "I've never been close to a man half-dressed I wanted more to do with than heal." Her eyes widened as she realized what she had said, and she bit her lip, the blush deepening as she hurriedly looked back into the basket to rummage ineffectually for another long moment.

Thankfully, he wasn't too shocked by her remark, but rather amused by it, as evidenced by the chuckle of laughter, followed by a wince of pain. He didn't think he'd re-injured anything, but those ribs of his were aching again, and his back felt like it was on fire. "Do you still wish to wait for your father to arrive before we are wed?" he asked, dark eyes dancing with amusement.

She gasped, her head jerking up as she stared at him. All too soon, however, she noticed the sparkle in his eyes, reaching over to slap his knee. "Och, you tease," she rolled her eyes. "You're too much a gentleman to rush through a wedding without speaking to my father." She hadn't actually answered the question, though, laughing now as she moved to help him with his tunic and shirt. "Men always insist on doing everything for themselves," she muttered, and it sounded like a long held irritation. "Even if your arm was falling off, you'd try and do this alone."

"Would I?" he asked, trying to hide a wince as she helped him off with his tunic and shirt. "Perhaps I only let his blade graze me so that I could feel your tender touch," he teased again, even as he sucked his breath in shrugged the tunic and shirt from his shoulders. Thankfully, the Coimbran blade had cut a clean line across his back, which didn't appear too deep.

"Aye, you would," she chuckled, her smile less forced now she was beginning to relax. Her fingertips skimmed very gently along the line of the cut, below the open flesh. "This isn't so bad," she told him. "Cleaned up and touched with a wash of herbs, I won't need to even bandage it." As she spoke, she reached for the jug and basin, wetting a cloth to begin the swift work.

He turned so that she could get at his back better. The slash would likely add one more scar to a young body that already bore more than his fair share. He remembered each one and how it had been earned, but he was still young and blessed with a healthy body that had a tendency to heal quickly. "Your father shouldn't have left you here alone," he said, voicing an opinion he'd, up until now, kept to himself. He knew the man hadn't done it because he didn't care for his daughter, but if he had not been there, there was no telling what the Coimbrans might have done.

"He's already lost one son, Jos," she said quietly, but there was a flat tone in her voice that suggested this was not up for discussion. "He can't lose another." She was gentle as she wiped the already dried blood from his skin. "He didn't want to leave me, but there was no choice. That is all there is to it."

"I know, love," he said, the frown heard in his voice, even with his back turned toward her. "I do not mean to judge his actions. These are hard times we live in. I am glad I was here to protect you. I am only thinking perhaps 'tis time to show your people how best to defend themselves."

"Those that can fight learned from their fathers," she explained, her attention focused on his back as she worked. "Those that were best were taken by the Coimbran army. My father will be at Arindale by now. It should not be so much more than a week or so before he returns."

Juliana de La Roche

Date: 2015-10-20 11:21 EST
"Let us hope he returns with reinforcements," he replied, remaining as still as stone while she cleaned the blood from his back, his shoulders tense. The pain was nothing really, when compared to his previous wounds. "In the meantime, we should do what we can to defend this place against another attack." He didn't bother to mention what might happen if the Coimbrans learned what had happened to their captain and his guards.

"Four of the guards survived," she told him, gently drying his skin before reaching into the basket for the wash she had promised would dull the pain from the cut, which was only deep enough to be annoying. "They'll be kept for my father's judgment when he returns. The bodies will be burned. The captain gave no hint that anyone knew they had come this way."

"Juliana ..." he started, hoping to make her come around ot his way of thinking. "Coimbran patrols come through here on a regular basis. All I am saying is we need to be prepared." Not you, not your people, but we, as if he was including himself as one of them. He turned to face her, interrupting the tending of his wound. "If the Coimbrans find out what happened here today, there will be hell to pay. Would you rather be prepared for such an eventuality or hope it never happens?"

She met his eyes as he turned about. "I'm not saying no, Jos," she told him softly. "I'm afraid, that's all. The more attention we draw, the more trouble we'll have. If they spot us training with weapons, they'll want us done out before we can give them any difficulty when next they want something from us. It isn't impossible, but it's difficult."

"Then we make sure they don't spot us," he replied simply, but he didn't really want to debate about it right now. There would be time for that later. "I'm sorry, Jules. I only want to help," he said, turning back around with a sigh. "You took a chance in saving me and bringing me here. The least I can do is help defend this place. These lands are not Coimbran or Frankish. They belong to the people who live here, yet, I fear they will have to choose sides in this war or risk being decimated."

"I know you want to help, and I do appreciate it," she assured him. "I'm sure the lads left here would be more than eager to learn how to use the weapons they have. But I've a care of duty to Darroch and Dunfayre. If it can be done discreetly, I see no reason why it shouldn't be done, aye?" His concern for her people was touching, reminding her again of the many reasons she had fallen so hard and so quickly for him. "Brace yourself, this may sting a wee bit." The warning came as she stroked the soft cloth over the cut once again, this time soaked in the herb wash she was using. She knew it would sting at first, before numbing the area entirely.

He clenched his jaw more out of frustration than due to any pain, though he visibly stiffened as he felt the cloth sting his raw flesh. "They will be back, mon coeur, and they will want to know what become of their men," he warned her quietly, hoping that would not happen until after her father arrived back with enough soldiers to defend this place. "Perhaps I should send another missive."

"I am not telling you no, Jos," she repeated, feeling his frustration. "Just to be careful about it." Taking the cloth from his back, she inspected the wound, nodding to herself. "Aye, that should heal up within a day or two. Let me fetch your clean shirt."

He knew she wasn't telling him no, but it frustrated him that they were in this position at all. He could only hope that his letter had reached Charles and that he would do something about the situation here, but until her father returned from Arindale, they had no way of knowing what the duke's decision might be. He said nothing while she fetched a clean shirt, his jaw set, thinking about the friends he'd lost on the border only a few weeks ago. What was he going to say to their loved ones when he returned" Why had he survived when they'd died" What was it the Goddess wanted from him' "I need to pray," he told her, speaking at last.

Juliana nodded, understanding this desire. He had not been able to attend church with her in the village, for obvious reasons, but they did have a small chapel in the keep. "I'll send for the chaplain," she told him, moving to hand him the fresh shirt. "He won't be far, and it's been long since you've confessed. I can't stand to be more than a week without confession myself." She laughed a little helplessly at that admission.

That only made him frown more. It had been weeks since he'd confessed, perhaps months - not since he'd left Arindale for border patrol over a month ago. What was it he needed to confess, though' He had just killed a man, for starters, and he was lusting for a woman who wasn't yet his wife. Of course, he had lusted after women before and even fornicated with them, but this time it was different - this time it was not just about physical desire. This time it was also about what he felt in his heart. That, in itself, was no sin, but he needed to understand what it was the Goddess wanted from him and why he had survived.

His silence brought a concerned frown to her own face. "Jos?" Crouching down, she reached up to touch his cheek. "Did I say something wrong" I know I'm not the best with words, and I don't know how to be romantic. Too practical for my own good, my mother used to say. But I do love you, and I worry for you."

He lifted his gaze to her as she crouched down in front of him, a grief in his eyes that he had not quite accepted or dealt with yet. "No, ma petite. You have done nothing wrong, but I have just killed a man, and ..." He trailed off a moment, knowing that wasn't what was really bothering him. "I must say goodbye to my friends. Will you help me do that?"

Looking into his eyes, she felt a surge of guilt for not having suggested such an action herself. "Aye, if you wish me there," she told him softly. "I would do anything for you, love. Let me change my clothes before we go - I don't want to upset my people with the way I look."

"It does not have to be now," he assured her, knowing she had suffered as much as he at the hands of her attacker, though he had been putting off paying a visit to the chapel too long already. He touched her cheek tenderly, careful to avoid the bruise on her jaw. "I love you, Juliana. Nothing will ever change that."

Her smile softened as he touched her cheek, rising up to brush her lips to his in a gentle, slow kiss. She did love him, for all that it might seem fast, but her mother had always told her to listen for the heart that would make hers sing. Jos made her heart sing, and she would not make the same mistake her mother had. Gentle fingers wound into his hair as she kissed him, breathing him in for long moments as she let herself enjoy the sinful thrill of intimacy with the man she loved.

He did not - could not - deny her that kiss, though it only made those feelings of lust more difficult to endure and resist. Still, it was a slow, gentle kiss full of love and longing and as she wound her fingers into his hair, he slid his arms around her waist to draw her closer. Goddess help him, but if her father didn't arrive to marry them soon, he thought he might die from longing. He raised a hand to touch her cheek, to draw his fingers through her hair as his lips savored hers again and again, before slowly and breathlessly breaking her kiss. He touched his forehead to hers, his fingers trailing through the silk of her hair. "You will be my undoing, Juliana. I am not sure I have the strength or the patience to wait until your father arrives."

Breathless, she clung to him as he broke their kiss, trembling in his grasp not with fear, but with her own longing. A part of her wanted to throw caution to the winds - after all, she was certain she would not change her mind, and what harm was there in being intimate with the man she wanted to spend her life with just a little while before marriage" "If you're undone, then I'm naked already," she whispered back to him with a soft giggle, teasing her fingers through his hair. "I can't hide anything from you, love."

"You have me at a disadvantage there," he remarked with a small smile. She had, after all, seen him naked, albeit before she'd fallen in love with him, and there wasn't much she didn't know about him in that regard. It was tempting, so tempting to kiss her again, to unwrap her like a present and see what loveliness lay hidden beneath that wrapper of cloth, but it was not the right time or the right place, and knowing how much he wanted her only made him realize how very much he needed to visit the chapel. He drew a deep breath, his both aching with his wounds and with another kind of ache that was equally pleasant and painful. "Let us pray your father arrives sooner, rather than later."

Juliana de La Roche

Date: 2015-10-20 11:22 EST
"Aye, let's." She rose up to kiss him once more, making a monumental effort to keep the tender touch brief before slipping from his arms. "I've to change," she reminded him. "Most don't know what could have happened, and I would rather they didn't. Foolish wishes for revenge cause trouble." As she spoke, she pulled the laces of her outer dress loose, shaking it from her shoulders, and turned her back as her hands untied the laces of the heavy shift beneath. Shy she might have been, but she knew herself well enough to understand that the sooner she was ready to leave, the easier he would be once he had visited the chapel.

There was little need for revenge, he thought, when he had already killed the man who would have done her harm, though he was not naive enough to think there would not be others. The sooner he made her his wife, the better, not to mention moving her to Lonnare. He watched with rapt attention as she tugged at the laces of her dress, and with a monumental effort, turned away so that she could change without him gaping at her with adoring and lustful eyes. What would she think of him to know he wanted her as much as the Coimbran captain had, though for different reasons" His desire was born out of love, not merely lust. He distracted himself with tugging on the clean shirt she'd brought him, glad she didn't see the expression on his face as he pulled it on over his head and torso, glancing briefly at the wound in his side, thankful the stitches hadn't ripped open in his struggle with the captain.

With his back turned, he didn't see that she wasn't stripping herself completely naked, her form still mostly hidden by the short chemise she wore beneath her clothing. Still, she could feel her cheeks burning as she struggled into the undamaged shift and dress Laurel had found her for, smiling at little at the haste that had brought out one of her best dresses in exchange for the one that had been torn. That done, she raised her hands to undo what was left of the braid in her hair, combing out the tangles as she looked over at Joslin. Was a woman supposed to feel so strongly for a man as she did for him, she wondered. It wasn't simply the love that made her heart ache at the thought of harm to him; it was the way her body yearned for his touch, his kisses. It was usual for a married woman, apparently, but she'd never realized that feeling began before marriage. "Why is it a sin to want to touch?" she asked him suddenly, a part of her wondering if he knew the answer.

Compared to her, the knight looked like a common servant with his blond hair disheveled and the plain tunic and trousers he wore. He'd been born a commoner, after all, and fit the part well. Though she might not be a high-born lady, he thought her more beautiful than anyone he'd ever met. As he turned to face her, the question took him by surprise, as evidenced by the look on his face, not quite sure how to answer that. He was no cleric, and he hadn't always been exactly virtuous, though he'd never taken a woman by force and he'd never given one a child. Why was it so different for a woman than a man' Was it only because a woman could become pregnant' It was just as sinful for a man to make a child out of wedlock, wasn't it' "I think it is because the union of a man and woman is looked on as a sacred thing and a gift from the Goddess."

"Then why isn't every union of that sort considered sacred?" she asked curiously, twisting her hair back out of her face. "Why only married unions" It does not make sense, Jos. Does it?" It was a sensible enough question, though one that ladies of a certain rank and higher were actively encouraged never to consider.

"I cannot answer that, Jules, but I believe the Goddess wishes us not only to enter into a union of the physical kind but that of-that of the heart. When a man and woman come together in such a way, they are honoring the Goddess and her love for us, and if a child is made from such a union, then perhaps it is her way of blessing us," he explained, though he was certainly aware of plenty of loveless unions that had produced children, so it was more than just that. He sighed, thinking a cleric could explain so much better than he. He reached for her hands, linking her fingers with his, a look of solemn regret on his face. "I must confess I am ....I am not so pure of body as I once was, but my love for you is pure and true. There has been no one for a very long time, and though I have not been so very virtuous, you are the only one I have every truly loved," he confessed, pressing her hands against his heart, as if that would somehow make her believe him.

The fervent way he took her hands and confessed to her brought a look of surprise to Juliana's face as she looked into his eyes. "Och, love, I wouldn't expect you to be pure in such a way," she promised him. "It is different for men than it is for women, I do understand. So long as you love me, that's all I wish for. I'll never be untrue to you." Easing closer, she rose onto her toes, brushing the tip of her nose to his with a soft smile. "I love you, and I trust you, and I know I shall not change my mind nor my heart where you are concerned. So why is it a sin for me to want you so, when we've already promised to spend our lives together?"

His vision clouded with unexpected tears as she heard his confession and didn't condemn him, but rather seemed to understand and accept his past, as well as trust that he loved her and would never hurt her. "I do not know, love," he replied, uncertainly. "Perhaps it is only that the Goddess demands to witness our promise and offer her blessing." There was more to it than that, he knew, but that was the best he could do for now. "I only know that I love you and that I don't deserve you," he admitted, bowing his head in shame.

If only she could say for certain how her father would react if he returned to find her married, Juliana would have thrown caution to the wind and had the chaplain marry them that very day. But Aidan Darroch could be unpredictable in temper sometimes, and he would be worried enough having left her alone in the first place. "Perhaps it is only that men wish to be certain that they are the father of their wife's child," she offered innocently. "And if you are the only man I ever lie with, there would never be any reason to suspect such a thing, would there?" Blue eyes lit up with mischief above her smile as she drew his hands up to kiss his knuckles. "Come, love. We should go to the chapel while there's light."

"Perhaps," he admitted, though there was a slight flaw in her logic, he thought. So long as a woman only lay with her husband, there could be no doubt as to who the father of her child was, but that was not always the case, and in a place like the borderlands, it was all that much more important that the women be protected against an enemy who might do them harm. His frown softened as she kissed his knuckles, her smile chasing the shadows from his heart, as bright as a sunny summer's day. "Tres bien," he replied, surrendering to her. It had been his wish, after all, to visit the chapel and pay homage to his comrades who had fallen beside him.

Hand in hand, she drew him from the chamber and down through the main hall, ignoring the indulgent smiles cast their way by the housekeeper and bailiff as they assisted in the clean up. Out into the sunshine, and Juliana turned her eyes away from the bodies stacked neatly by the wall, ready to be burned when the pyre was built. Only two men had died, one by Joslin's hand, but she had an aversion to death that was so wholly unnecessary. Only a little courtesy, and they would still be living, after all.

Had he known how she felt, he might have apologized for the man's death, but though he felt sorrow for the man's family, he knew he had been justified in his actions. As pointless as it sometimes seemed, this was war, and it was the Coimbrans who were to blame for such violence, not those who lived on the border. He only gave the two bodies a cursory glance, having seen plenty of bloodshed in his time spent as a knight in the King's service. So long as it was not the blood of his countrymen or those who were under his protection, all he could do was pray for their souls, just as he'd promised the Coimbran captain at his death.

The chaplain, an elderly priestess who had clearly joined the household for the years before her death, was already within the chapel as they entered, murmuring softly over the incense burner as thick clouds of sweet smelling smoke filled the little space. Built within the walls of the keep, the chapel was a small affair, but very much still in keeping with the great Temples that had been built in the cities across the continent, simply a smaller version of those larger places of worship. As they entered, Juliana paused, taking a shawl from the hook just inside the door to cover her hair - a border custom that would take time to break her of, no doubt. The altar stood behind the carven screen, visible from the door through which they entered, and upon the altar lay five urns, the last mortal remains of Joslin's companions. It was for them the incense burned, blessing the space in which they rested until they could be returned to their home.

Juliana de La Roche

Date: 2015-10-20 11:23 EST
Joslin waited for Juliana before continuing forward, his gaze lingering on the five urns upon the altar, the final remains of his friends, some of whom he'd known for years. Fresh tears burned his eyes, but he silently blamed the incense, blinking them away before anyone noticed. It was a quiet, peaceful place, he thought, and mostly deserted this time of day. Joslin moved forward, pausing beside a pew and silently gesturing Juliana to sit before doing the same.

Gently squeezing Joslin's hand, Juliana slipped into the pew, sitting down to the familiar tune of the creaking wood in silence. Her eyes rose to the benevolent features of the Goddess' face, Her statue standing behind the altar, arms outstretched as though to envelop the congregation in her embrace, and as always, she felt the gentle peace of the church seep through her. With a brief glance to Jos, she slipped down onto the padded kneeler in front of her, closing her eyes as she bowed her head. She had a lot to thank the Goddess for.

For Joslin, it was more about confession than gratitude, though he, too, was grateful for the gifts she had given him. He bowed his head beside Juliana as he painfully lowered himself to his knees. His friends had sacrificed their lives; he did not think it was so much to ask that he suffer a little pain in honor of their sacrifice. He closed his eyes, shielding his face with his hands as he silently addressed the Goddess in his own head and heart.

It was a peculiarity of the Church that Her priests and priestesses were trained to tell when a person's private devotions to the Goddess were over. As Juliana's thanks came to an end, she felt the familiar gnarled hand against her head, offering her the priestess' blessing before she raised her eyes to the old woman's knowing smile. Yet no one moved to interrupt Jos as he prayed, not until the moment came when he had no more to say within the quiet of his own mind. The old priestess returned to them then, laying her hand on his tousled curls in blessing as she smiled her knowing smile once more.

He lifted his tear-filled gaze to the priestess when he felt her hand touch his head, knowing she was offering him her blessing, but not yet her forgiveness. "Mother," he greeted her, his voice a hoarse whisper. "Though I am a stranger in this place, I would ask that you hear my confession," he said, keenly aware of Juliana beside him.

"No man is a stranger in the Goddess' House," the old priestess told him, her aged voice hoarse but gentle. "Come, my son. I will hear your words, and the Goddess shall forgive."

There was a creak as Juliana sat back on the pew, fully prepared to wait as long as it took for Joslin to make his confession. She would not leave him to walk back to the keep alone.

He wanted no secrets between himself and Juliana, and yet, making his confession was something he needed to do alone. He only reached for her hand and gave it a soft squeeze, thankful she was there, even if she could not share this with him. "I won't be long," he promised her with a faint smile, before slowly regaining his feet and sidestepping his way out of the pew.

"Take the time you need," the young mistress of the house told him softly, sending him off with a small smile.

The priestess shuffled toward the confessional, a solidly constructed place of privacy set against the back wall, behind the statue of the Goddess. She stepped into one side, closing the door behind her, and Jos was allowed entry to the other. With the door closed behind him, no sound of them could penetrate to the chapel beyond, but they could hear one another through the wooden grill between the separate spaces.

Jos paused a moment before the statue of the Goddess to touch his fingers to his forehead and lips and heart in a gesture of reverence, not trusting himself to go down on one knee. It was going to be difficult enough on his wounded leg to kneel for any length of time in the confessional, but he didn't have much choice. After a moment, he followed the priestess to the confessional and disappeared inside, biting his lip against a groan as he fitted himself to the small space and went down on his knees once again.

"There is no need to kneel," the priestess told him quietly. "The Goddess sees all, and you are in pain. Take comfort as you ask for Her guidance through me." For a moment, there was quiet, and her voice rose audibly once again, reciting the prayer and blessing on this place and this time that was so familiar to the devout. "Now, my son ....speak."

He saw no reason to argue with that, relieved he wouldn't have to make his leg any sorer than it already was. He bowed his head while she recited the prayer and blessing, drawing a slow breath almost as if to gather his courage before daring to speak. "I am not sure where to begin," he started, uncertainty apparent in his voice. "I-I killed a man today, Mother, and though I know it's wrong, I believe I was justified in doing so."

There was another moment of quiet before the priestess answered. Living in the borderlands, this confession was not so unusual as it might have been further into either country. "To take a life is no small thing, yet one life when measured against many may yet be justified, if not easy to live with," she said carefully. "Tell me your reasons, my son. Tell the Goddess why you sinned in taking a life."

"I have taken many lives, Mother," he confessed with a heavy heart, though all of those lives had been taken in battle or in the defense of the innocent. "It was a Coimbran soldier," he continued. "I took his life in anger and hatred, but only because of what he was about to do."

"If his intent was evil, and your actions prevented that intent, then there is little to mourn in the death that was given," she told him, her voice reassuring in the darkness of the confessional. "Had you any reason to believe he might change his intent were he allowed to live, then that death is unforgivable. Which is it, do you believe?"

"I am certain his intent was evil and that he would not have changed that intent. By killing him, I prevented further loss of life and harm to those who are innocent and less able to defend themselves. I am a soldier, Mother. A knight of Francia, sworn to protect my king and my duke and my people. It is all I have ever wanted to be, but I have failed. Five of my dearest friends fell to our enemy because we failed to anticipate an attack, and I am the only one left living. I do not understand why the Goddess spared me and took them. While I am grateful to have been spared, I grieve for their deaths and pray for their souls."

"While the Goddess is mother to us all, that is not all She is," the priestess said gently. "She is all things in balance. She is life and death, sadness and joy, good and evil. She gave you life when death took those you came with; had She not given you that life, how many others now would suffer at the hands of those who meant them harm' Though death may seem a punishment, your friends will never again feel fear or pain; they are with the Goddess, wrapped in the infinite warmth of Her love, never again to sorrow or suffer through the travails of life. Pray for their souls, but do not grieve for them overlong. They are at peace. Indeed, even the evil which has seen an end will join them. For the Goddess is all things, and though Her punishment may last for many long years, isolated from Her touch, even those souls will eventually be forgiven."

He wept quietly, but openly at her words - words that offered him comfort and peace and forgiveness. Though he knew all this already, there was comfort in hearing it from the priestess and in knowing his friends were at peace. He sniffled, wiping the tears from his face with the back of a hand. "Thank you, Mother," he told her quietly, though he was not finished. "There is something else," he started, his thoughts turning to Juliana and his growing love and desire. "It is the Lady Juliana. I have asked her to be my wife, and she has accepted, but I am not worthy of her love. She is so good and kind and pure - like an angel, she is. I do not wish to sully her life with the blood that stains my hands, and yet I love her with all my heart and cannot imagine my life without her. I am not pure in body and mind and heart, and I ask forgiveness for my transgressions in offense to the Goddess, and for my lady's sake."

Juliana de La Roche

Date: 2015-10-20 11:24 EST
There was a pause as the priestess considered his words, her smile audible as she spoke. "Where true love is nurtured and tended with care, there is no sin," she told him softly. "Such love as you have that shall be joined in marriage is such a love as this. Your promises are made to one another, before the Goddess, who is omniscient. Hold true to those promises, and no loving action will be a sin for either one of you. It is the gift of the Goddess."

"Oui, but before ..." He broke off, as he struggled to confess the sins of the flesh that had taken place before he'd met Juliana, before he'd fallen in love, before he'd proposed marriage and promised his heart. "I ask forgiveness for what I have done before. Let me do penance for those sins so that I can enter into this marriage with a pure and loving heart." There was pleading in his voice, and despite his shortcomings and faults and failings, it was obvious he was sincere in his desire to uphold his promise and be a good husband.

"Young man, I have lived a very long life," the priestess told him with a long-suffering sigh. One had to wonder just how many young men she got in her confessional asking for penance for this sort of thing. "I have seen war and death, cruelty beyond anything you can imagine. But I have also seen peace, life, love. I have seen acts of kindness that have touched my heart and deepened my faith. It is my opinion, and I have seen nothing to negate it, that sin only occurs when you begin to treat people as things. The women you have loved in your life ....have you ever simply used them and walked away' Have you ever done anything that you cannot forgive yourself for?"

He sniffled again, his emotions threatening to get the best of him, the guilt he carried on his shoulders mostly self-imposed. "I have never forced myself on anyone or taken anything that was not freely offered," he replied, nor had he ever had the need or desire to pay for any favors of the flesh. He'd had a few affairs, but none of them had been very serious and they all paled in comparison to what he felt for Juliana. "I love her, Mother, more than life itself, and I would do anything to keep her safe from harm, even if it cost me my life. She is everything to me." There was only one other person he loved as much as his Juliana, and that was his sister.

"Then you need no absolution to enter your life with her," the priestess told him gently. "To cling to such thoughts when no wrongdoing has occurred is to serve yourself badly. The Goddess would not have given you this gift if She thought you incapable of honoring it. As for your wish for penance, I will give you only this ....the command to love and honor your Juliana all your days, and never to stray, so long as you live."

Relief washed over him, lifting the burden from his shoulders and the guilt from his heart, and he stifled a sob of relief. "Merci, dame mere," he blurted in his native tongue, his face wet with tears she might not be able to see through the screen that separated them but would be able to hear in his voice. "I will, I swear. I will love and honor her always and never give her any reason to doubt my love."

"Then go in the peace of the Goddess, my son. In Her name, by Her light, and with Her blessing, I absolve and cleanse you of any sin." In the dim light beyond the screen, she could be seen making her obeisance to the Goddess, setting him free of his perceived sins.

Whether those sins were perceived or not, he felt a huge load lift from his shoulders, as if his soul had been cleansed, living him pure in heart and intent. When he finally stumbled out of the confessional, his face streaked with tears, there seemed a lightness about him, his face almost shining with an otherworldly light, as though the Goddess' blessing shined from somewhere deep inside him. He smiled when he saw Juliana, a radiant smile, like the sun emerging from behind the clouds on a stormy day.

The change in him was beautiful to see. Juliana met his smile with her own, warm and tender, glad to see that just a little time with the wise woman who tended this chapel had been enough to lift the burden from his soul. She rose from the pew as he approached her, holding her hand out to him. She spoke no words, unwilling to break the stillness of the chapel, but instead touched a kiss to his cheek, deeply grateful to see him so at peace within himself.

Though his body still ached with the healing of his wounds, his heart felt as light as a feather, burning with the desire to make his life count, to make a difference in the world, and to prove himself worthy of the Goddess' blessing, and all of it started with Juliana. He took her hands between his own, touching his lips to her cheek. "Je t'aime, Juliana," he whispered, his voice catching in his throat.

Looking into his eyes, the trauma of the day was forgotten. Nothing mattered but seeing him so light-hearted, so happy, after their truly awful morning. "I love you, too," she whispered back to him, drawing him out of the church, the shawl left on the hook inside the door. "What would you like to do today?" she asked him when they were outside in the cold sunshine.

What did he want to do' It felt like he had somehow transcended the past and was given a new beginning. There were so many ways to answer that question. He wanted to love her and find some way to show her he loved her, but before he did anything else, he wanted to find a way to honor the friends he had lost and to honor the sacrifice they had made to keep these lands safe for the people who lived here. The question was how. "I wish to honor my friends, and I wish all those who live here to know who they were and why they were willing to risk their lives for what they believed in." It wasn't very romantic, perhaps, but he could not truly bid them farewell until it was done. "A bonfire in their honor," he suggested.

Juliana nodded, easing herself into the circle of his arms, uncaring that her people could see the easy affection between them. "Then that is what we will do," she promised him. "I will have the word put out and we will celebrate your friends' lives when the work of the day is done. But until then, Sir Knight' There are hours to fill, unless you've a wish to return to bed and rest after your exertions."

"Would it be too forward of me to ask to tend your wounds for a change, my lady?" he asked, an almost impish smile on his face. He had practically received the priestess' permission to love his Juliana any way he wished, and yet, he knew that whether he waited for her father's arrival or not, it would change nothing. He would love her for the rest of his days, and whether he waited a little while longer or took her to his bed now, it would make no difference at all.

She laughed, her cheeks blooming with color as he asked his question of her. "I've naught but bruises," she reminded him, though it was hardly a no. "Are you a skilled healer, my love, as well as a bonny fighter?"

"Skilled?" he echoed with a light shrug. "I am a Knight of Francia, my lady. I have many skills," he teased, a small smirk on his face as he circled his arms about her waist, not quite giving her a straight answer.

"Aye, and a silver tongue to match," she teased him, just barely wincing as his arm encircled her waist, pressing lightly against the sore bruise rising on her side. Her fingers danced against his chest. "Well, my bonny, if you would see to my bruises, we must go back inside, for I'll not strip here in the sunshine for any sweet smile you might give me."

He frowned when he noticed the wince, even though she'd tried to hide it, and loosened his hold on her waist. "Are you hurt?" he asked, a look of concern etched on his face. He had no way of knowing what hurts she might be hiding beneath her clothing, but at least, she didn't seem to be seriously injured.

Her fingers traced his cheek gently as she smiled. "Just bruises," she reminded him in a soft voice. "I fell hard against the bed on that side, love. It will leave a mark for a wee while, 'tis all." She stopped herself from mentioning all his hurts, aware by now that he did not like to have a fuss made.

Juliana de La Roche

Date: 2015-10-20 11:25 EST
The frown was still in place, unsure if he should insist on looking her over or not. "Which side?" he asked, though he could have guessed. Though he wasn't a healer, he had treated a few wounds in the field, mostly out of necessity, and knew the basics. He could, at least, tell her if she had any broken bones.

Her smile softened, understanding a little of his need to make sure for himself that she was whole and well. "My left," she told him, one hand against his chest. "But you are not examining me in the courtyard of the keep, love. So far as most know, nothing happened to me, and I would like to keep it that way. They need to see me hale."

"Tres bien," he replied with a sigh, though he understood her reasoning. "Shall we then, my lady?" he asked, offering his arm with a smile that looked only a little bit worried. He was certain she wasn't badly hurt, but it annoyed him that she'd been hurt at all.

"Aye, we shall." In Juliana's mind, she had not been hurt at all, though she knew she would be stiff later as the bruises rose on her body. Still, she allowed him to worry over her as he allowed her to worry over him, curling her arm through his own as he escorted her back to the keep itself. "You seem lighter now you've confessed, Jos. It is good to see."

He resisted the urge to pick her up and carry her back to her rooms in the keep, knowing that would not only aggravate his own wounds but draw attention to her own injuries. "Oui, though I still feel the need to do something for my friends," he said with a slight frown. Was it a silly idea to honor their memory here when the duke would likely be doing so again once they reached Arindale" He had prayed for their souls and the priestess had assured him they were at peace, but for some reason, it didn't seem like enough.

"We will honor them," she promised him. "Give me but a moment when we enter the hall, and the preparations will begin. We have given them their funeral rites, but we will not begrudge you a celebration of their lives. We know they died for us, Jos. Our ways may be a wee bit more rough and ready than you're used to, but we will honor them with you, in our own way."

"Merci, ma petite," he told her quietly, both relieved and touched that she would be so willing to do this, not only for him but for his friends. "But first, we should be certain you are not badly injured," he insisted quietly, for her ears alone, as he led her along.

Careful to keep her mild irritation at his concern for what was, in her opinion, nothing to a minimum, she squeezed his arm gently, calling for Marta, the housekeeper, as they entered the keep once again. Just a few words later, and Juliana was confident that there would be a fine celebration that evening to remember Joslin's fallen companions. "There, all settled," she told him, tilting her head as she looked up at the knight before her. "How are you feeling?"

By the time the plans for the evening were in place, he was looking a little pale. Though in good spirits, he was still healing and the fight with the Coimbran had clearly worn him out. It looked like if he stood there much longer, he might just fall over. "A little weary," he admitted with a slightly annoyed frown of his own. He was eager to be well again and despite his weariness, it felt good to be up and out of bed for a change.

She bit her lip, trying not to smile at his annoyance as she took his arm once again. "'Tis best you rest, then," she told him, as much his healer as the woman who loved him in that moment. She wouldn't allow him to tire himself too much, no matter her own wishes.

"I am growing tired of rest," he told her with a wry chuckle, but he knew better than to argue. He was more concerned for her than himself, and yet, he knew from experience that he needed his rest if he was going to fully heal.

"Do not force me to dose you," she threatened him teasingly as they headed for the stairs and his alternate chamber. "I will, if you start to disobey me. I am a very strict healer." Her eyes twinkled as she looked up at him, knowing full well that he wouldn't have the energy to do more than climb under the blankets, given his wearying morning.

In truth, he might not even have the energy to carry through with his promise to examine her for injuries. "I wonder what you will be like as a wife," he teased back, taking the stairs slowly, one at a time, though he did not complain.

"Och, I'll be the thorn in your side, the smile on your pillow, and the sunshine behind your clouds," she told him, reciting almost by rote the way her father had always referred to her mother. "You'll never be rid of me so long as you live, so you'll just have to get used to it, my bonny."

He chuckled, though it made his side ache to do so as he slowly made his ascent up the stairs. "The thorn in my side?" he echoed, tucking an arm against his wounded side. "Is that what?s making my ribs ache?" he teased, both of them knowing it wasn't.

"Not right now, but give me a year or two," she countered mischievously, adjusting her grip so that one hand rested at the small of his back as they made their slow way upward. "You don't need to fear showing me your pain, love. I know you feel it."

"It's not as bad as it was," he admitted, making his way up the stairs out of sheer will alone. It had been hard enough kneeling in the chapel, but it was only now that he realized just how much the swordfight had taken out of him. He would have told her he'd had worse, but it would be a lie. He had come far too close to death this time, but if the priestess was to be believed, the Goddess was not finished with him yet.

"And as you tire, your pain returns," Juliana told him with a knowing smile. "You can't lie to a healer, love. I've spent years learning this art." She kissed his shoulder as they gained the upper landing. "Come now, it isn't far. I'll have Laurel hunt out something for you to wear this evening, and adjust it a wee bit so it hangs right."

"Do I need to confess again?" he asked with a smirk, though he'd not been lying. He was feeling far better than he had been a few weeks ago, but it would take some time to regain his strength. "I owe you a debt of gratitude, Juliana," he told her, not for the first time.

"You owe me nothing but your good health and long life," she told him tenderly, reaching out to push the heavy door to his chamber open and allow them passage inside. Thanks to the deepening chill as the winter came on, a fire was already lit in the hearth, warming the room comfortably.

"Let us pray the Goddess grants us both such," he said, as he followed her inside. The warmth of the fire felt good on his chilled bones, but served to make him feel even more sleepy. He wasted no time in shuffling over to the bed and lowering himself down on it. "Tell me, do you think me a fool, ma petite"" he asked, suddenly wondering if he was being just a little melodramatic.

"I've not seen you do anything foolish, my bonny," she said in confusion, helping him to settle onto the bed. Rather than pain him by pulling his boots off him, she simply reached for the spare blanket that was hung over the end of the bed itself. "In what sense do you mean?"

Too tired to pull his own boots off, he merely laid back on the bed, catching her hand as she pulled the blanket up over him and pressing it to his lips before letting go. "Fussing over you," he said, his eyes already growing heavy. "Worrying over my friends ....confessing my sins ..." His words were starting to slur the longer he tried to stay awake.

She smiled gently, tucking him warm beneath the blanket as he began to drift off. "No word or action is foolish, if it preys so on the loving mind," she told him softly, stroking his hair out of his face. "You'll see things in a bonnier light when you've rested, love." Bending, she kissed his forehead tenderly.

"Je t'aime, Juliana," he muttered sleepily as his eyes drifted closed and he lost the struggle to stay awake. "Merci."

"I love you back, Joslin," she murmured to him, unwilling to leave until he was sleeping peacefully.

If anyone had told her even a month ago that she would be so bound in heart and mind to a Frankish knight, she would have laughed at them, certain in her own way that she would never lose her heart to anyone. Yet here she was, seated by his bedside, content to watch him sleep as he drifted into unconsciousness under her watchful eyes. Perhaps life really was as her mother had always said - a promise waiting to happen. Though the clouds might hang heavy in the sky, never forget that the sun is still shining. With Joslin's arrival, the clouds over Juliana's heart had parted, and she was blossoming in that sunshine. Not even the threat of living here on the border was enough to dull the joy of that knowledge - that soon she would be a wedded wife, bound forever to the man who had finally touched her heart.