I was breaking down. I felt the departure and return, as a wave to and fro against the shore, each time Warren overcame me and I pushed back. It was going to happen. I felt the weariness souring my body and mind. The brush of carpet scratched at my cheek. Then it stopped in the crash and scream of glass and fear. A weight dropped against my back and was gone, and all I heard was my father say "Stay down." A smell of iron, the gurgling of a clogged drain, and I did not need to look over at Warren. I did anyway and saw the rent throat. Blood and bone, wide eyes up gaping at the ceiling. There then gone, all in a moment. I had seen death before. I had seen blood before. I had only caused it once. Now I was causing it again. I wanted to be sick, but all I could say was, "I warned you." Sitting in that room, fighting the nausea of my internal battle, feeling so drained and trying to be ready the moment they called. Yes, they. I heard my mother, she told me to stay in the room. I did as I was told. I was too weary to do more. Shouts, calls, a blast from a gun so sharp it almost cut with the sound. All this I heard and did nothing until I was bid to move. My parents had given their reply to The Society for trying to take me away, use me. That reply was an unequivocal "No". I told Annie that her sister was dead. Maybe she always knew it was going to happen. She did not shout or cry out. She just stayed where she was in the kitchen in the basement and we bid each other farewell. It was too like a scene from a play, all perfect lines, not straying into the things we really wanted to say. It was odd to think of that as being done for good. That there wouldn't be a member of The Society coming to find me again, to add to their collection, to use to their purpose like a generator. I didn't have much time to think about it, though. Nicholas was outside. He was bound to the railings with Dante sitting guard of him. Yes, my parents probably were not of a generous mood. I was in no better mood, even if I was feeling all stupid and churned up that I got caught. I turned from Nicholas. He was gone ? long gone. That's what I tried to tell myself. Part of me wanted to punch him, kick him, ask him why, ask him if it was all a trick, but I couldn't bring myself to do so. The answers didn't matter. It was done, and I was done with him. Fool me once, shame on me. I just wanted to get home, wanted to get clean, scrub my brain if I could, but I knew I couldn't. Just curl up in a ball and start the next day fresh, without being stupid. When did I get this way' I used to be clever. I should read more. Bubber always said to trust people up to a point, but that point was a good twenty yards off. He also said anything of love was a farce and fit for stage but not life. Play the part, but don't get trapped in it. Don't be stupid.