Friday, 25th September - Les Miz rehearsals
Things had been going pretty well during rehearsals for the most part, except for the occasional faux pas or minor mishap. The cast and crew were excited about bringing Les Miserables to life on stage at the Shanachie, and Aran was as eager as any of them, but perhaps, but slightly different reasons. He'd won the role of Marius, hands down and with argument from anyone once they'd seen him in the part. When Aran was on stage, he became Marius, putting so much of himself and his heart into the role, it was easy to forget he was only playing a part, but it was during one of these rehearsals that it almost proved too much for the elf. The song was Empty Chairs and Empty Tables. It was the song that had won him not only the part but a place in the company that year, proving once again that he was worthy of a place there.
Thankfully, it wasn't a rehearsal that included the full cast and chorus. They were rehearsing the smooth transition between Empty Chairs At Empty Tables and the following movement, which meant only the students at the barricades and Dru Granger were present, along with Ludo, the director. Josh Stuart was one of those students, standing silent behind Arandir as he sang, a ghost in the mind of Marius with the promise that the lighting would help the illusion. Dru, as Cosette, wasn't supposed to be on stage for this part, leaning comfortably against the wall as she listen, rapt, to the beautifully intense cadence of Arandir's voice.
At first, it seemed the tears were just part of the role. Good acting, perhaps, but about halfway through the song, the elf's voice broke and he fell silent. It had been a particular line that had done it. "Oh, my friends, my friends, forgive me ....that I live and you are gone. There's a grief that can't be spoken ....There's a pain goes on and on." That last line had been whispered so quietly, it could barely be heard and then he fell silent, a pained expression on his face that was more than just due to good acting.
Josh had been the first one to notice that something was wrong. Though he didn't know Arandir well, they'd rehearsed this scene time and again, and the elf had never failed to give a heart-rending performance, but he had never fallen silent mid-song as though he'd been struck dumb.
"Aran," Josh whispered behind him, but it was already too late. The music had gone on without the accompaniment of words, and had at last died away. It seemed as if the entire theater had fallen silent with him, and no one knew quite what was wrong or what to do. Josh stepped forward and touched a hand to the elf's shoulder. "Aran' Are you all right?"
Tears were streaming down the elf's face, as he turned to face the young man who was portraying his best friend. He took one look at Josh and knew he had failed yet again. Choking down a sob, he mumbled an apology in a language Josh didn't know and hurried to make his way offstage to collect himself in private.
There was a minor scuffle from the stalls, where Ludo had only just noticed what had happened, but by the time the director had unfolded from his seat, Aran was already off-stage. Dru caught him as he hurried away, worried about the quiet but always collected half-elf she'd come to admire over the last year. "Come with me," she murmured to him, giving him a gentle tug out of the immediate backstage and into the warm up area behind. There was no reason for anyone to come back here right now.
Later, he'd be grateful for Dru's intervention, but right now, Aran was too lost in his own grief to do anything but mutter an apology that was only half meant for her. "I'm sorry," he murmured under his breath. "Goheno nin," he whispered, repeating it again as he crumpled onto a couch, drawing himself up into a ball and rocking back and forth, his arms clasped tightly around his knees.
Unlike others, who might have fussed over him, Dru recognised some form of trauma when she saw it. She'd been through something similar, but she had had a lot of help from family and from Josh when it had been at its worst. All she did was sit down beside him, not touching him at all, and pull her phone out of her pocket. A moment later, her voice made itself known. "Hi, Carina" It's Dru. I think you should come to the Shanachie - Aran's had a bad turn. He's not hurt, he's just really emotional. Okay. Okay, sure. Come through the stage door, we're in the warm up room." Finally, she laid her hand on Aran's back gently. "Carina's coming, Aran."
The elf was so far gone and lost in his despair that her words hardly reached him. He only clutched his knees, head bowed, and broke into heartbreaking sobs.
Josh joined them, looking from one to the other, just as Dru hung up the phone. "I made excuses to Ludo. Told him Aran was feeling a little ill today." He glanced at the curled up elf who seemed to be having some sort of breakdown before looking back to Dru with a concerned and confused expression on his face. "What's the matter with him?"
One hand on Aran's back, Dru looked up at Josh with a concerned look on her face. "Remember what I was like after the anniversary of my mom's death?" she offered softly. "I think this is the same sort of thing, but much, much worse. It's almost like PTSD; something triggered him so badly, he's completely caught up in it." She sighed softly, wishing there was something she could do. "I called Carina, but I don't know what else we can do."
Though Josh, too, had lost his mother, he had never suffered through such a traumatic event as Dru had or, it seemed, Aran, and while his heart went out to them both, he had no idea what to do to help. "Just stay with him, I guess, until Carina gets here. What do you think triggered it' He was just singing when he suddenly went silent," Josh said, keeping his voice as low as he could, so that none of the others onstage or otherwise would overhear them.
Though he knew what Dru had gone through, he didn't know Arandir very well. Except for Carina, the elf kept mostly to himself, and while he had been part of the theater company for over a year, he had remained aloof through it all, quiet and shy, but always coming through with a perfect performance, even when he didn't understand the story or his part in it. Josh had tried to get to know him better and had failed. He just wasn't around enough anymore, now that he and Dru had married and had responsibilities of their own in Tirisano. If only he had known the irony of it all, but up until now, Carina was the only one who knew the truth of Aran's past, and she had not spoken a word of it to anyone but her own family.
"It was that line, I think," Dru murmured, her hand gently rubbing over Aran's back, reluctant to remove that touch for now. "You know ....my friends, forgive me that I live and you are gone. That's a powerful line in itself, even without the music and the visual to go with it." She genuinely had no idea what was going on herself. Like Josh, she hadn't managed to make a friend of Aran, though Carina had been friendly enough. It was a difficult situation. "Ludo's okay with the interruption, right?"
"Yeah, I told him he wasn't feeling well, and Ludo believed me," Josh replied, looking worried. Josh wasn't sure what to do to help, and if Carina couldn't manage to somehow reach the elf, there wasn't anything Josh could do or say to keep him in the company. "Do you think we should try to talk to him?" he asked, uncertainly, unsure if they should wait for Carina or not.
"What do we say?" Dru asked him, at a loss herself. "The only reason I responded to you was because I love you, and I knew you wouldn't hurt me. I don't think he has any friends, does he" I've tried, but he's always so distant." As she spoke, she glanced toward the door. Carina wasn't known for her careless driving, but Dru had once seen her knock over a market stall to get to Aran in a hurry.
Josh frowned at that. He'd tried in his own way to get acquainted with Aran, but maybe he hadn't tried hard enough. He and Dru weren't around much anymore, but was that an excuse really when they all worked for the same theater company' "Maybe we should try harder, Dru. You remember what it was like when we first got here and didn't know anyone?" Josh pointed out with a slightly guilty frown on his face.
Things had been going pretty well during rehearsals for the most part, except for the occasional faux pas or minor mishap. The cast and crew were excited about bringing Les Miserables to life on stage at the Shanachie, and Aran was as eager as any of them, but perhaps, but slightly different reasons. He'd won the role of Marius, hands down and with argument from anyone once they'd seen him in the part. When Aran was on stage, he became Marius, putting so much of himself and his heart into the role, it was easy to forget he was only playing a part, but it was during one of these rehearsals that it almost proved too much for the elf. The song was Empty Chairs and Empty Tables. It was the song that had won him not only the part but a place in the company that year, proving once again that he was worthy of a place there.
Thankfully, it wasn't a rehearsal that included the full cast and chorus. They were rehearsing the smooth transition between Empty Chairs At Empty Tables and the following movement, which meant only the students at the barricades and Dru Granger were present, along with Ludo, the director. Josh Stuart was one of those students, standing silent behind Arandir as he sang, a ghost in the mind of Marius with the promise that the lighting would help the illusion. Dru, as Cosette, wasn't supposed to be on stage for this part, leaning comfortably against the wall as she listen, rapt, to the beautifully intense cadence of Arandir's voice.
At first, it seemed the tears were just part of the role. Good acting, perhaps, but about halfway through the song, the elf's voice broke and he fell silent. It had been a particular line that had done it. "Oh, my friends, my friends, forgive me ....that I live and you are gone. There's a grief that can't be spoken ....There's a pain goes on and on." That last line had been whispered so quietly, it could barely be heard and then he fell silent, a pained expression on his face that was more than just due to good acting.
Josh had been the first one to notice that something was wrong. Though he didn't know Arandir well, they'd rehearsed this scene time and again, and the elf had never failed to give a heart-rending performance, but he had never fallen silent mid-song as though he'd been struck dumb.
"Aran," Josh whispered behind him, but it was already too late. The music had gone on without the accompaniment of words, and had at last died away. It seemed as if the entire theater had fallen silent with him, and no one knew quite what was wrong or what to do. Josh stepped forward and touched a hand to the elf's shoulder. "Aran' Are you all right?"
Tears were streaming down the elf's face, as he turned to face the young man who was portraying his best friend. He took one look at Josh and knew he had failed yet again. Choking down a sob, he mumbled an apology in a language Josh didn't know and hurried to make his way offstage to collect himself in private.
There was a minor scuffle from the stalls, where Ludo had only just noticed what had happened, but by the time the director had unfolded from his seat, Aran was already off-stage. Dru caught him as he hurried away, worried about the quiet but always collected half-elf she'd come to admire over the last year. "Come with me," she murmured to him, giving him a gentle tug out of the immediate backstage and into the warm up area behind. There was no reason for anyone to come back here right now.
Later, he'd be grateful for Dru's intervention, but right now, Aran was too lost in his own grief to do anything but mutter an apology that was only half meant for her. "I'm sorry," he murmured under his breath. "Goheno nin," he whispered, repeating it again as he crumpled onto a couch, drawing himself up into a ball and rocking back and forth, his arms clasped tightly around his knees.
Unlike others, who might have fussed over him, Dru recognised some form of trauma when she saw it. She'd been through something similar, but she had had a lot of help from family and from Josh when it had been at its worst. All she did was sit down beside him, not touching him at all, and pull her phone out of her pocket. A moment later, her voice made itself known. "Hi, Carina" It's Dru. I think you should come to the Shanachie - Aran's had a bad turn. He's not hurt, he's just really emotional. Okay. Okay, sure. Come through the stage door, we're in the warm up room." Finally, she laid her hand on Aran's back gently. "Carina's coming, Aran."
The elf was so far gone and lost in his despair that her words hardly reached him. He only clutched his knees, head bowed, and broke into heartbreaking sobs.
Josh joined them, looking from one to the other, just as Dru hung up the phone. "I made excuses to Ludo. Told him Aran was feeling a little ill today." He glanced at the curled up elf who seemed to be having some sort of breakdown before looking back to Dru with a concerned and confused expression on his face. "What's the matter with him?"
One hand on Aran's back, Dru looked up at Josh with a concerned look on her face. "Remember what I was like after the anniversary of my mom's death?" she offered softly. "I think this is the same sort of thing, but much, much worse. It's almost like PTSD; something triggered him so badly, he's completely caught up in it." She sighed softly, wishing there was something she could do. "I called Carina, but I don't know what else we can do."
Though Josh, too, had lost his mother, he had never suffered through such a traumatic event as Dru had or, it seemed, Aran, and while his heart went out to them both, he had no idea what to do to help. "Just stay with him, I guess, until Carina gets here. What do you think triggered it' He was just singing when he suddenly went silent," Josh said, keeping his voice as low as he could, so that none of the others onstage or otherwise would overhear them.
Though he knew what Dru had gone through, he didn't know Arandir very well. Except for Carina, the elf kept mostly to himself, and while he had been part of the theater company for over a year, he had remained aloof through it all, quiet and shy, but always coming through with a perfect performance, even when he didn't understand the story or his part in it. Josh had tried to get to know him better and had failed. He just wasn't around enough anymore, now that he and Dru had married and had responsibilities of their own in Tirisano. If only he had known the irony of it all, but up until now, Carina was the only one who knew the truth of Aran's past, and she had not spoken a word of it to anyone but her own family.
"It was that line, I think," Dru murmured, her hand gently rubbing over Aran's back, reluctant to remove that touch for now. "You know ....my friends, forgive me that I live and you are gone. That's a powerful line in itself, even without the music and the visual to go with it." She genuinely had no idea what was going on herself. Like Josh, she hadn't managed to make a friend of Aran, though Carina had been friendly enough. It was a difficult situation. "Ludo's okay with the interruption, right?"
"Yeah, I told him he wasn't feeling well, and Ludo believed me," Josh replied, looking worried. Josh wasn't sure what to do to help, and if Carina couldn't manage to somehow reach the elf, there wasn't anything Josh could do or say to keep him in the company. "Do you think we should try to talk to him?" he asked, uncertainly, unsure if they should wait for Carina or not.
"What do we say?" Dru asked him, at a loss herself. "The only reason I responded to you was because I love you, and I knew you wouldn't hurt me. I don't think he has any friends, does he" I've tried, but he's always so distant." As she spoke, she glanced toward the door. Carina wasn't known for her careless driving, but Dru had once seen her knock over a market stall to get to Aran in a hurry.
Josh frowned at that. He'd tried in his own way to get acquainted with Aran, but maybe he hadn't tried hard enough. He and Dru weren't around much anymore, but was that an excuse really when they all worked for the same theater company' "Maybe we should try harder, Dru. You remember what it was like when we first got here and didn't know anyone?" Josh pointed out with a slightly guilty frown on his face.