Topic: It's just a prank, bro!

Spell

Date: 2015-11-06 16:57 EST
Tied in with This Post]

"Successful prank! The benefits should be coming in soon!" Jesse exclaimed while she rubbed her hands together.

Across from her sat Grog Daggerfist, the orkish Watch Chief of Station #12. He sat at his desk and was busy picking fresh meat from his teeth. As for the only other person in the room — Tommy-Two-Tongues was lounging on the corner of said desk.

Grog let out a grunt. "Oi, when're we seein' da' money?"

"I've been wonderin' the same thing." said Tommy-Two-Tongues with a languished and over-exaggerated sigh.

"The money should be coming in soon. Look, they dropped all that cash to help fix up a building that wasn't even burnt down all the way! Of course they will send cash over here! How else will they fix that bench?" Jesse exclaimed with a point of a finger toward the both of them.

"All we have to do is wait. I told you the plan would work! Honestly, I think you should have let me kill one of your guys, then we'd get the `boo-hoo, Watch officer slain, give us free money and visit our memorial!` reaction."

"Prolly woulda' been da' best idea.." Grog stroked his beard. "But we can't be doin' it righ' now. Too soon." The hulking greenskin shook his head.

"I just want my money.." Tommy-Two-Tongues whined.

"We're going to get our money!" Jesse clapped her hands together. "Focus, people! The end goal is cash! We need to milk this as much as possible! Tommy, find some people to start putting...I don't know, flowers and pictures of that dead Watch-dude that the bench was made for," Pausing to raise her arms like she was lifting something."then put the stuff by that damn bench," Lowering her arms. "then Grog - you need to come out and do some lame speech about how at times like these we need to support the Watch, and that any support is good support...all while standing next to a donation bucket."

Tommy-Two-Tongues licked his lips and dropped from the table. Having two tongues made that look a little weird. "I'm off then~." He said in a sing-song voice.

As Tommy-Two-Tongues departed, Jesse was left with the over-thinking Grog Daggerfist.

"An' you're sure dis is gonna work, pinkskin?"

"Why wouldn't it' People like `doing the right thing`" with finger quotes. "It makes them feel good to give to others, that way they can selfishly point it out to someone in line at Starbucks while acting like they are the most charitable person ever. Don't underestimate the selfishness of others, buddy...and, well, if this backfires...I'll just scream everything was just a prank, or a social experiment, and take the heat off you."

Grog crossed his arms and furrowed his brows in thought. Then, with a nod, he'd say. "Let's make dis money den."

Spell

Date: 2015-11-09 19:40 EST
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Vivian Greene, aka "The Butcher of Countless Children" by her haters, sat in a comfy red chair. Atop her lap is the lovable and most charming dog known as Sparky, who is currently chewing on a rather large, pristine, and NEW bone.

"I didn't think this plan would work, but it did...I've already gained enough money to open five more clinics at this rate! But I won't," she laughed. "Because there's better things to spend all of it on...Like a new fur coat for me and more bones for lil' Sparky."

Sparky barked in delight!

Jesse cackled. "Just like I told Grog and Two-Tongues here, this is a perfect plan! All these people going crazy about the fires...the pocket books are opening up! Exploit, exploit, exploit." Chopping a hand down against an open palm to make her point. "Where there is panic, anger, and fear" There's also money to be made."

"I have to say...The charred dog was a good idea." Vivian said as she pet at good ol' Sparky.

"Slap a cute animal up on something and you're bound to get more money. People will hand over cash for animals waaaay more compared to little starving children. It's human nature." Jesse tapped her fingers together. "Grog! Why are you being so quiet?"

Grog, the chief of a Watch Station down in Dockside, was busy trying to use his huge, sausage-like fingers to type away on his new laptop.

"M'tryin' to set up mah rhy-date account...I wanna get all da elf bitches, an' I got da' cash now to make 'em like me."

"Oh...Well, good luck with that." Jesse said after staring at him for a few seconds. "What about you, Tommy' How's the bench memorial going?"

"Perfect! See these new shoes?" Tommy-Two-Tongues kicked up his feet to show off his dragonleather boots. "Got 'em with my share of the money, an' the money keeps rollin' in!"

"The cash flow will last for probably another week, so don't spend too much of it.." Jesse said with a finger in the air. "These things cycle out...The news and people won't care anymore after one or two weeks, life will go on and they will forget all about the poor bench, the officer it was made for in the first place, and the poor-poor burned body of Not-Sparky."

Grog looked over his laptop. Tommy-Two-Tongues thinned his lips in obvious annoyance. Vivian narrowed her eyes. Sparky barked.

"When the well dries up...We dig a new one." Jesse said calmly as she smiled.