Righto this journal has many titles! One major title I'm calling it since this is a new forum and the final home of Ren. Title is below in big fantastical words. New Life New Beginnings!

Moonshine is my worst enemy, Vodka is by far my best friend.

Jan. 19th 2008: Was when it was first posted.



Where to start, I know it's been a while but hey can't blame me for having the worst bits of my life in a month can you? I suppose we should start with Talon and I, well I did some thinking and realized it wasn't fair to him if I couldn't return his feeling for me now could I" Oh well. He's letting me stay at the manor though, cause I'm not quite ready to go back to the Estate and I'm sure as hell not going to stay at the embassy. That just won't work for me. Kaze and I don't exactly amount to good blood when it comes to staying in a room for more then a day.

Jock doesn't seem to mind the room change and my room does look great. Talon said he understands, that I need to find myself and I'm doing it. I've decided that from now on I'm only doing things I want, I think that's the best way to go. I just have to weave out a few kinks here and there, but hey I'm working on it. Other then that there's always the issue of Wolvie and Aly, that still bothers me, but I guess I have no choice seeing as how he and her are life mates. Still sounds odd, but I'll get over it with due time.

Icer's been ill recently and it's worrying me to death. I know she says one of our sister's is missing so I'm looking into it. It seems as the elections get closer that more and more Rhy"Din seems to be getting worse. Didn't think they were that important, but then again that's why I'm not the one running for the position. Oh well I know something good will come out of it eventually. Though it still bothers me that one of my sisters has gone missing and no one seems to care or notice. I'm not going to just forget about it either.

Hey then there's this thing with Gabe, it's bugging me, I can't stop thinking about it and what might happen if something happens. Bah, I'm just going to push it aside for now. Moonshine seems to be the worst thing for me but Amber is just so sweet, she even brought me two bottles of it and wanted to have a picnic right there in the dead of night. She's the best really. I was absolutely sloshed apparently and moments later was sobered up by a dip in the lake. It wasn't fun, it was cold, it was wet, and it was in the dead of winter. Gabe saved me so I guess I can't be too baffled by anything now can I" Oh well pushing that thought aside again!

Vodka however, I'll get to that in a moment. There's this fellow named Frank that seems to be an all around great guy, I can't argue with that at all for some reason I can't stop thinking on the talking I did with him. It was a good chance for me to think on a few things and set my mind in order. The bonus is he's got green eyes, why must I always be a sucker for the green eyes, honestly' We spent hours talking at the tea shop before we decided the soft tea and coffee thing just wasn't for us. That's when we moved to the hall for a quite atmosphere and a few drinks of well, Vodka. I drink that stuff and things seem to be happening all wonderful like.

To think I was all pouty and sobby a few hours ago is like having to do a recount for votes. It's just hard to believe that one night of just talking to someone and taking a step back from it all could really help. He's even offered to teach me how to shoot a rifle, which is quite new to me, I'm used to hand guns and side arms, even a blade, but an assault rifle in my hands" Sounds well" Kinky to say the least. The whole time I was wondering what to wear...That just seems, well odd, cause I've never worried about that before.

Tomorrow I'm gonna pack lunch or dinner when ever he chooses to teach me and make sure plenty of fantastic things are made. I don't know why I feel I need to impress, granted we did agree it sounded more like a date then a lesson. He says he wants to try and drink a dragon under the table, I told him to dress comfortable because I don't go under alone. For what its worth I had fun when I was done sobbing over my own pathetic existence, for what its worth I didn't even think of the curse. I was just myself for once. And that never seems to happen.

There are just too many thoughts on my mind right now and for once, I'm smiling because I know that the direction I'm going is going to be a blast. I'm having fun with just taking life a day at a time and for once I think I'm going to enjoy it. Probably not as much as I did spending time talking with Frank, but I know that if I keep having fun here and there, I might just get along just fine. Who knows.

Toodles!

]

In all actuality she was nervous, very nervous. Squeezing his hand again she leaned in and rested her head on his shoulder. Eyes on the road ahead as trees crept up around it. A path of pines lined the road as the car turned and moved with ease down its rocky course. A few bumps were hit but never felt. A side road was turned on slowly as just in the distance there was a set of cast iron gates growing towards them as they approached.

Turning to gaze out the front window as the car moved along, he leaned his head in turn against hers, squeezing her hand back, feeling a slight tension in her shoulder as it pressed against him. Seeing the large gates approaching in the distance, he tensed slightly himself.

As the car slowed to a halt she reached over him and another button was pressed. The window came sliding down as she waited, looking at him with another reassuring smile. Biting her lip again she reached out and let a thumb graze over a scanner as it flashed to life with light. There was a beep and the gates creaked open. Window was slid back up in its closed position as Ren slid back into place. There was a voice through a speaker that said in a soft female tone," Welcome Home Ren Shimmerscale."

Taking it all in with a growing sense of intrigue, he watched the heavy gates swing open. "Was that your housemaster? I didn't expect that you had an estate." He looked ahead at the distance of the road. "Especially not such a large one."

Chuckling to him she whispered," That was a recording my dearest." Smiling she looked around as nice ever green trees lined the road in a more linear fashion. The road turned from brown to a gravel red as it moved forwards. A view of a massive Victorian Estate came into view. The outside was white with crimson linings on the wood. Doors French in design came to light as the car came to a stop. Then the doors opened for them to help them out as she smiled to him. Squeezing his hand once more she separated from him and climbed out of the car. Looking at the front doors she waited for him to join her side. The car door closing behind her of its own accord.

Stepping from the vehicle, he swung the door shut behind him, walking around the back to join Ren. He appraised the huge house, taking in as much detail as he could, unconsciously speculating at volumes and areas. He looked at her, brows raised. "It's quite extravagant."

Twilight hues found his again as she blushed slightly," Well it was built for more then one person." Another nip was made at her own lip as she stepped forwards. The doors opened to let them enter. Black marble floors lined their path as two turning stair cases made of crimson oak greeted them as well as a golden crystal chandelier. Eyes looked around before she glanced back at him," It's too much I know, but it had to be big for the things that may happen, if not....I.." But she cut off still too nervous to say it.

Following her in, he took a quick look at the foyer, but hearing a tightness in her voice, he turned his eyes on her and kept them watching her body language as she stopped short in her speech. Turning to face her, hands going to hers and grasping them tightly, he kissed each of them. "I'm sure your reasons for having such a magnificent dwelling are sound, Ren. Please, say what you'd like to."

-con-

Nodding, he gestured her onward, keeping his hand in hers as she led him through the room. "How many do you keep in staff, and where are they housed?"

Looking around she thought for a moment," Well, I don't keep a staff. This house will be a self serve house. But this room is mostly for meetings." Walking into the kitchen she sighed in relief to see a much smaller room. It was basically a standard size kitchen, up to date with the standard time's accessories here and there. However there was a open space with buttons over it that made her smile," Good they added the replicator."

Taking in the kitchen layout, paying particular attention to windows and doors, he knocked on the door frame as he entered. "Who built the house, and did you supervise the construction yourself, or have an observer on site?"

Eyes turned on him as he knocked. Smiling she spoke softly," I had an observer, and visited frequently. The builders are well trusted and quite talented back in my world."

Nodding, he smiled at her, appreciating the fine woodwork that had gone into the house. He gestured for her to lead him on. "How many rooms in total, and are there any outbuildings on the property' Also, how many acres is the entire estate?"

Astonished at all the questions she seemed to smile wider as she squeezed his hand. Pulling him to a door she opened it on a small green room with a pool and hot tub in the middle. Blushing again she shook her head, even she was surprised to see plants from her home world canvassing the place," Lets see. I believe the last count in total bed rooms was forty, open for rent of course and for those employed by Wolf Security. There is a green room, kitchen, library, a den, and a few other private study rooms as well. I believe there is only one out building for garden tools and cleaning in which I plan to do myself or have a hologram do, that's the inelegant conscious I was telling you about. And I believe when the land was purchased it was some where around two hundred acres, oh and there is a garage stored for extra activities and a stable." The lay out was coming back to her as she thought.

He turned to her, fixing her with a gaze in her eyes, his face unreadable. "Wolf Security?"

-con-

His hands moved to the top of her hips and rested there, gently pulling her to him. Smiling, he brushed his cheek past hers, moving his mouth slowly towards her ear to whisper. "I can think of a few rooms I'd like to see, but I doubt the drawing room is as comfortable as your bed-chamber."

Pressing into him she purred lightly to the sound of his voice. Twilight hues closed as she leaned her neck into his breath and licked her lips. Fingers still grazing over his neck she whispered in his ear softly," Don't you mean our bed-chamber my dearest?" Eyes flickered open to find his as she grinned playfully to him.

Smiling, he returned her gaze. "It will be soon, love." Leaning in once more, he kissed her, fingertips easing just under the hems of her clothing to feel her firm, heated flesh.

Gasping to his words and her pet name she smiled. Kissing him back she caressed his cheek as her thumb traced over his jaw line. Closing her eyes again she felt her heart skip a beat.

Pausing in his passionate endeavors, he placed a single kiss on his cheek, whispering again in her ear. "Take my hand. Lead me there, darling."

Nodding she trailed her fingers down over his chest as they moved to one of his hands. Lacing fingers with fingers she squeezed it softly before she turned towards the door facing the entrance of the house. It opened freely as if it was making the way much easier and faster for them. They were in the lobby again. This time she went to the stairs on the right. Climbing up them she moved into the west wing which was souly devoted to the library and the master suit. Two crimson wood doors were near the end of the hall as they passed a set of glass French one that displayed the library. Once they were at the doors it was obvious that for once Ren would have to open them. Pushing them open with ease she looked back to him and smiled.

-End Log-

]

This one is a nifty bit posted way back in November.



Ren gulped as she looked at the pad in her hands. Shaking slightly at the words that glowed in its" small screen. Biting her lip she felt the urge to stand and scream with joy, but then there was dread. The joys of the news seem to grip hold of her like a disease only to be pushed aside by the dread. Conflict broke through her inner self and slowly she lowered the pad. Pushing it aside as she sat at the table she buried her face in her hands.

She didn't think she'd get in. The reality of the events around her, the fact that she was who she was, and the fact that she wasn't the best with relations with them, had made it hard pressed to believe she was going to actually get in. Yet there it was still glowing through the face of the pad as clear proof. Kaze had gotten in. Then there was the reality of the dread. Knowing what she would have to leave in order to go. Granted she knew Wolvie would be proud, he'd be thrilled, but it meant that she was going and he was staying. No amount of relationship was going to be there, except for a friendship. Could she live with that'

In the time she had known Wolvie she had felt love for him, but she was always on the short end of the stick. Always last where relationships were placed, then she had gotten used to it but now" Now when they had, had a few dates" Could she go back to being just friends"

Leaning back and closing her eyes she thought about all that had happened. The fight with Kasper, her hand meeting the girl's cheek. Then leaving with Wolvie and fighting against the Neosapians. Coming home only to think that Wolvie had been killed, god that had nearly destroyed her. The time as a captive, being treated as a Neo, no sleep, no foods, and no drink; that was well, no walk in the park. Once more there was the rescue, and her hero as usual Wolvie. Why was it so hard for her to walk away"

Looking at the pad, then to her com badge she swallowed, either way she wouldn't be too far away from both worlds that brought her joy. Even if it meant saying good bye and going back to the short end of the stick. Who knows, maybe it was better that Wolvie and her stayed friends, but again the wonder of if she could live with that crept into her head. Shaking her head she picked up the pad and saved the message on it. With a heave of a sigh she slowly began to write:

Wolvie,

Attached is well, my acceptance letter to Star Fleet. The more I think about it the more I realize maybe its better that I go. I can't say it's something I really want to do, but I've been thinking a lot recently and I think its best. You and I weren't meant to be. So hey, live life, and well be happy please. That's what I'd like to see if I come back, you happy. Oh and if it's alright I'd like to keep Jock with you, take care of him please. He'll know when a message comes from me. I'm sure he'll let you know.

All my love,

Kaze.

Grazing her eyes over the letter she swallowed and sent it. Slowly she rose from her seat and looked down at the Scottie asleep in his bed, he wouldn't like this. Jock was well free spirited yes, but he also loved his Kaze. It was hard for her to keep doing what she was doing and knowing that she just had no chance. That's why she was going, to have a chance somewhere. Who knows probably even make Wolvie proud along the way. Once her bag was packed she swallowed and looked back on what she saw as a temporary home. The estate glittered back at her quietly. Inside there was a note and a dog who would greet the man who held so many dear memories in her mind. Now she had to leave them behind. Sure it wasn't going to be easy but she had a life to build even if it meant sacrificing the hope and dreams of another life. She only had so many years ahead of her, perhaps someday she would return, find Wolvie well and happy. She was sure that this was the better step for her to take. Hoping that when and if she returned Wolvie would still be her friend.



Ren Phase One: Waking the Hell Up!

Cue Theme Music!

Months ago Ren was all business, all you hurt me or my friends I hurt you! Months ago she didn't see what death was like until that fate filled day. Even didn't know how bad running from obligations and promises was to be. Meeting death at the time seemed a whole hell of a lot better then betraying a loved one, even a friend. Still when she woke up as a damn teddy bear, the very thing Bob had gifted her, her fire, her spark! All that was her was still there.

In a way she admired that blue fuzzy ball she happily named Akuma those many days ago when it came with a yellow ribbon and addressed to her courtesy of Bob. That fuzzy side wasn't afraid to kick, scream, punch , even harass those she felt necessary" Still that teddy bear had guts, blue, fluffy, yellow bellied, button eyed, and pink nosed, no matter how cute, it still had guts!

Now as the bodacious babe of blond hair and blue eyes, was an all around coward"

She had shown umph only when she wanted to make Wolvie proud, and she proved that on the Xavier, even though she was shaking in her boots, a lot. Heck even when she was on that ship it was either training at a console, buffing up on information on Star Fleet, or practice after blasted practice of that damn entrance exam. When she had finally taken the Exam she had planned on telling Wolvie about it when they had gotten safely home" but safe didn't happen.

Nope, after nearly dying with grief for the loss of Wolvie she rummaged, determined to find his body, to give him peace. Six days of wreckage and there was nothing to show but a bag of clothes, a jacket, and a broken communication badge. Returning the bag to Kasper, telling her the man she loved was dead, that they both loved, was painful, more painful then she had imagined. Handing over that bag of clothes she insisted to pack for him, even though he said not to, was just as destructive to her. So determined that she'd be the one to find him, that she above all would see his return dead or" alive" she gave up her immortality. Then there was that lust, that beautiful lust to see that the "killer" recently discovered as Brian Fury, though she didn't know" would die a very painful death that Ren would see through to the end. In one set of words her angelic wings, her immortality, and her gut filled existence, was gone. She could die now, and she felt it as her human life started on a very empty stomach and in the dire need for sleep.

The issuing plot of a better method, of finding him and seeing to it that he was safe had been determined with the finding of a Black Scottie, now hers, named Jock. Even that dog had more umph then Ren! Highly intelligent, very proud, and even well free spirited. This dog was nothing like the dog stories of Earth insisted.

Ren was finally going to do something, and as she pushed on that door, she saw the last person she had wanted to see. She would never have been able to tell him she was leaving, that was why she had left the note. Turning quickly she made to rush away, but her feet froze because she couldn't resist that voice," Kaze?"

Turning on her heels she looked at him with blue eyes and a weak smile," Hiya Wolvie?" Only to look upon the one man who could keep her from going.

His brown hair, beard, and bright sky blue eyes rested on his fine features like a dream come true. Usual white robe covering the usual S.N.E.A.K. suit, it didn't matter, white or not, he still could make any woman melt. A deep voice that was his and his alone rang through her ears only to make her need to stay grow," Where are you going?"

Bobbing on her feet, black boots not staying firmly planted on the ground. A blue vest covering a white long sleeved top which fell over a set of blue jeans that clung to her snugly shifted silently as muscles tensed. Blonde bangs the only thing long enough to be pulled back, but not brushed over her face, down her neck, and over her shoulders smoothly as pale face, and quivering lips stayed only glued on him," You didn't get the letter?" She couldn't help but ask as she tugged a tan laptop bag, no laptop, closer to her, filled with one pad and a few pairs of clothes she had managed to stuff in there.

He shifted on his feet, made his white cloak sway. His voice came again, making it more and more painful to say what she felt she must say," What letter?"

Blue eyes closed and blond hair shifted as she turned her face away. A rummaging hand tore through her bag only to produce the pad, and her copy of the letter. Looking back to him as she extended it to see a lifted hand and hear that voice again," No' Tell me."

Stumbling until words fell out from those pink shaking lips," I got accepted" I'm going to Star Fleet." Now curiosity blossomed as she waited for his reaction, would he be proud, would he step aside, or would he stop her, oh how she wanted the first and last to happen above all.

Two words and a furrowed brow, was that good or was that bad. There was a glimmer of surprise shining in his eyes," You applied?"

The chibi in her brain smacked herself at those words. Why hadn't she told him before they left, maybe he would have been less distracted, or worse, even more. Gulping back that idiot chibi waving a fist of rage, for why she did not know, she spluttered out an equal worded reply," I did?"

Then there came a heavy sigh from him, why must he always, always be so hard to read!" A side step to show that even then all eyes were still on her, the room had gone shockingly silent. Then as if he had noticed it too he spoke," Kaze" let's go for a walk." Turning to the others in the room, which included a big blue dragon, he did a soft bow and spoke," Take care Icer."

Speechless she turned and bowed first to Icer then the others," Bye." Was all she could say as she felt him pass by her and turned to follow his lead. The Great hall left in their wake. Walking a step behind him she finally broke the silence," I left you the letter because" I didn't want to bother you?" Her head was lowered; she was watching her feet as they moved down the stone path.

"Bother me" You were watching my back while I was at Bonny Corp." His hands tucked behind his back, he was taking long sweeping strides, slowing so he was walking with her.

Finally there was a subject she could grasp, looking up she smiled at him. It was a toothless smile, but it was still sweet," I'm glad it went well" If it hadn't I had a surprise for them any ways?"

That made his shadowed figure stop, turn, and look down at her," Oh?" Was there a grin playing on his face"

Once more her hand dug into her bag, shuffled through more like, messing up the order with in and pulling out a small ball set atop a spring on a stand. That ball had springy hands, big beaming eyes, and a tongue spiting out of a mouth. Smiling up at him like a proud child showing off an art project she whispered," When I beamed you out' I was going to send this back" It's a bomb?"

"Oh gee?" A small chuckle escaped his lips as he spoke again," How sweet of you."

"No one messes with my Wolvie." She giggled as she stowed the bomb back in her bag carefully.

"Thanks Hun." He said as he looked down at her. Slowly his eyes slid back up and he glanced around with a sigh," So' Leaving huh?"

Back on the original subject she gulped. Why was this so hard"! Speaking once more, this time her voice shook," I don't want to leave" but?" She cut herself off and closed her eyes.

"But?" His gaze fell back to her.

Shooting up her blue eyes open and a fountain of words poured from her lips," I don't want to be in the way' I'm useless Wolvie. I have no skills what so ever besides burning water."

The little movement he made he stopped," What do you mean useless." Pausing he watched her for a moment before saying once more," You're not in my way."

Shaking her head as she lowered it she spoke softly," I just feel like without me around you'd have better chances."

"Better chances" at what Kaze?" He looked unmoved his face was almost quizzical as he looked at her.

Sliding away from him a bit she murmured," At being" at peace" at being." Slowly she looked away and bit back tears," Happy."

His voice grew louder," And since when have you been the hell in the way of all that Kaze"!"

The chibi in her head was sobbing; she herself was abashed by the raised voice. Sighing she spoke," I don't' I don't know?" Her head that had been up and looking to him lowered.

"If you want to leave, that's fine. But....don't leave because of me. I....care about you very much. Just because I don't know what I want, doesn't mean you have to leave."

Tears spilled from her eyes and she rushed forwards. Gripping his robe she buried her face as she sobbed into his chest," I don't' want' to' go."

Emotion unknown he wrapped his arms around her frame and spoke," Then don't."

It took a moment for her to regain that well stronger, coward of a side," I won't?" Slowly her gaze lifted and she looked up at him.

Shaking his head a bit," Stop feeling like yer in the way, and that you burden me. If you did that at all....I'd tell ya."

For some odd reason that made her chuckle," You promise?"

"No' I swear it." There was a pause and he spoke light heartedly," Besides" I need ya" again."

Again? He made it seem like a bad thing. None the less she blinked," You do??

Sighing he managed to explain in depth what was needed to be done. Chibi bouncing with new found courage it smacked Ren's brain and prodded it good. This was going to be interesting. At last' Ren was back.

More November...



Ren Phase Three:: Springy Smiley go BOOM!



That bodacious blonde was well a little itchy. In fact she was mental. For nights she had kept herself locked away in a room either at Icer's or at the Estate. In fact she even wondered if Wolvie was worried about her or not. Then again Wolvie was always busy so she wasn't too bothered about him. After all she had seen him the other night, that night was a good night.

Blond hair pulled back in to a tight knit bun that seemed to flair every where and a set of black welding goggles rested atop her head. Ren had been tinkering, which may or may not have been smart. Peering over at something she had received in the mail she had smiled. Shifting again she looked at the sliver box like thing on an arm band and then placed it down on the letter addressed to her.

Dear Ren Majin,

I hear that you decided not to come to the Academy even after the marks you had received on the entrance exam. I do hope that our involvement with you on previous occasions has not deterred you from perusing a future in Star Fleet, I am sure you would not hold that grudge against Star Fleet on my accounts. I hope this letter finds you well and gives you a chance to reconsider. It would be welcomed greatly if you would take this opportunity. Sincerely,

Katharine Janeway

Ren didn't need to reconsider, she wasn't going any where. Ever. As she stuck out her tongue looking down at a small device attached to a belt she smirked. Then there was a hiss, which caused those blue eyes to widen. There was a crackle and a snap, and then smoke came wafting from the small device. Leaning back in her seat she rubbed her chin, oil smeared all over her face. Granted there was oil all over her skin, white wife beater tank top, and grey work pants. White tennis peeked from under the rather baggy pants as she lifted a screw driver and went back to tinkering with the device. Hours seemed to pass as she worked over that thing. A few more break downs here and there, but eventually she thought she had it. Standing she wiped her hands, more oil was smeared as she lowered them down on her sides over her shirt. She didn't know how much of a mess she really was, didn't even see the spot of oil on the tip of her nose. She was too busy, too distracted on making a few improvements to security at the Estate, Icer's Lair, The Orphanage, and even out and about.

Frankly the use of rubber gloves had became quite common as she had been named god mother by Snow of young Odela the terror. Her hair would never be the same after that first initial set of golden sparks surged through her body, none the less Odela was adorable. Ren liked kids, though the thought of having any wasn't an option unless the time was right and the right person was there. A few points she had noted and thus she would settle for the title "God Mother "for now.

Shifting on her seat she examined the object again. Slowly she clasped her fingers around it and scooped up the arm band. It was time to test her invention and she knew just how to do it. However she would need a witness. Scrolling bits on paper she handed them to Jock her beloved Scottie. Speaking softly in that honey sweet voice as she scratched his ear," Jock" Find Wolvie" See if ya can't get him alone as well?" Winking to the dog she scooped up a bag and moved for a more convenient place to perform a test.



Ren found Wolvie first after a side chat she had with Darkmere about her confidence. Granted she was still a coward but! There was a surge of outwardly growing confidence from all her tinkering and self relating. The bear inside was pushing through and eventually that spunk was shining through. The tinkering was her therapy, her source of feeling useful, and her way of making Wolvie proud. She had already placed the device on her belt, and was beaming at how well it blended in with her attire of wife beater, gray baggy work pants, white tennis shoes, and grease. Blond hair was pulled up into a messy bun with poofing hair flaring every where, blue eyes peered through that grease kissed face, and the rest of her exposed flesh was just as greasy, if not worse. The blond though messy was still very bodacious in her own way.

There was Wolvie sitting at the lake, he seemed brooding or just dazing into the darkness of the night. She did her usual thing and slid up behind him wrapping her arms lovingly around him. Ren would always adore Wolvie, always, there was no changing that. That sugar sweet voice spoke with excitement as she leaned forwards and whispered in his ear," Hey hot stuff, wanna see something cool?" There was a never ending smile on her face.

Feeling the warmth of her behind him he smiled instantly. That smile on his face glowed in the darkness as he spoke with closed eyes," Sure Hun." Oh how Ren loved to see the smile on his face!

Leaning over she kissed the top of his head before slipping away with a soft caress of his shoulder, she made a mental note that Wolvie needed a shoulder rub from the talented Kaze. As she slowly moved away from him and allowed him one glanced at her oiled appearance and pulled up hair. She saw those blue eyes give her a slow graze as the widened," Wow Hun" Lookin?" real" real good."

That blond blushed to his words and looked in his eyes. Softly she pressed her pink lips to his cheek, probably the only thing on her not touched by grease. Those blue eyes beamed at his complement as she led him to a cliff. Biting her lip she stopped him and spoke softly," Kay' Stay here." When she got an alright from him she moved away and down the side of the cliff rather swiftly. Smiling as she came to a clearing well in his sights.

Leaning over she lowered a springy smiley face to the ground, it wiggled merrily on the ground. There was a flip of a switch, forcing no delay. As Ren waved to him that smiley would erupt into a plume of debris and flames spanning up and out. That scolding cloud would close around her removing her slender from sight. Black smoke filled the sky leaving Wolvie wide eyed and questioning why Ren had taken this way out.

Wolvie slid down the hill, more thoughts, and more guilt that was not necessary," Christ." Looking in the direction she was he instantly' instantly blamed him self. Did he push Ren to do that in some way' No' say it isn't so," Ren"!" His cries got louder as he moved to where she was last seen," Ren"!"

As he got closer there was coughing and maniacal laughing. The dust cleared and there was Ren sliding to her feet still coughing and laughing. Brushing hair from her face she looked at Wolvie," Wee! That scared the SHI" outta me."

Now he was running up to her, taking her in his arms as he wrapped them around her hips. Blue eyes showed his worry, showed the torment in his eyes. Stammering, falling on his words as he looked her over, no scratch in sight," Ren" what the" what the hell?" There was still worry in those blue eyes, but now there was confusion.

Leaning forwards she caressed his cheek with an oily hand, a small smudge was left on his cheek. However she hadn't noticed, she kissed his lips softly. That just made her tingle, made her shiver happily that even though he was single, she had the privilege to do that. She went to speak, but was interrupted by a voice and a beep," Shield strength at twenty percent."

When she kissed him, he kissed back, hard. Relief poured from him as he looked into those soft blues that locked with his,"Wha" What was that?"

Practically hopping out of his arms, even though she was hesitant to leave them, she looked down to her waist. Pulling that silver device from her hips there was a hiss as a blue glimmer appeared then faded. Smiling she waggled it at him as she spoke," Personal shield" nice little gizmo' considering I had it on low?" Pausing she looked at the bafflement on his face before she continued," It measures stress levels on the wearer?" Looking back to the patch of land that had been scorched, burned, and broken she beamed with pride before looking back at him," Now I knew that little bit was coming, but! For someone caught on suprise there might be a little bit of a sun burn in cases like that." Snickering lightly she bit her lip.

He looked over at the hole in the earth left by the blast before turning back to her. There was a soft, but strict tone to his voice," Ren" don't ya ever do that again? Ya had me shittin" bricks?" Still there was relief in those sky blue orbs as gave a sigh of relief.

Smiling a glittery pearl smile to him she let the tip of her tongue peek between the layers of teeth. Diving for her pocket she pulled out an identical gizmo just for him. Speaking softly to him," Well I did test it before hand." she leaned in to give him another kiss," Thanks for the worry though Hun."

Lifting a hand to take the device, he lifted the other to the back of her neck. Softly he kissed her back and gave a soft tender low thrum to her," I hafta worry about you, ya know, I care about you a lot."

She would close her eyes to his touch, as another wave of tingles erupted over her skin. Letting her lips curl into a soft smile centimeters from his own, " And that's why I made it....because I worry about you. I care about you a lot too Wolvie. I just want you to be safe."

Now his voice was a gentile whisper as he gave her an Eskimo kiss," Thank you Baby."

Softly she whispered back, that pearl smile still playing on her dirty face,"No, Thank you for letting me in the basement in the Estate."

Again the soft thrum of his voice graced her ears," Only the people I trust most are allowed in there, and apparently....I made the right choice."

Blushing to his words, though it was hard to see considering how dirty her face was," I won't let you down Wolvie?" She would shake her head to that as she spoke again just as softly,"Never, ever."

His eyes were still rested on her," You never have Hun, and I doubt you ever will. You're a blessing."

Blushing softly, he had those words that made her weak in the knees. Grazing her lips against his softly she spoke lightly," I like tinkering" It makes me feel useful again."

Giving her another soft Eskimo kiss, it seemed Wolvie didn't want to be as single as he thought. However for now" he'd keep things the way they are, but he just' liked being cute with her," You were never unuseful Ren.?

Ren knew Wolvie was having fun, she wanted that for him, wanted to see him always smiling like he was now. As he stepped away from her, removing her painfully from his arms she looked in his eyes and finally saw the streak on his cheek her hand had left. Blinking she looked down at her hands and clothes. She was a mess! Blushing she brushed her oiled hands over her wife beater and her mind muttered a few silent curses, she wanted always to look her best around Wolvie, right now was certainly not her best!

Still he managed to make her blush, even make her laugh; he was her weakness through and through. A few laughs here and there as they flirted, it was what they do, and it was what made them cute. The more and more they talked the more and more she never wanted to leave his side. The promise of lesions, a gift, and plans that night; then those faceless eyes fell upon them. Their moments always short lived a new face was brought into the mix. Aly was a friend of Wolvie's one that didn't scare her, worried her more like, from the look she was giving him with her vampiric eyes. Excusing herself from Wolvie and his friend she knew where to wait for him, and he would always know how to find her. That grease monkey would wait forever for that man, oh how she loved that man.

Ren would never show him her jealousy or anger for those women who saw only the man in him. She didn't know how to explain it, but those eyes from that stranger bothered her. However Wolvie was his own man, she would honor any choice he made in life, she wouldn't think of him in an ill way ever, she loved him too much for that. Even when Gabe had told her what he'd seen she hadn't cared, Wolvie had his reasons, and never kept secrets from her, though she told him over and over he never needed to explain himself. Wolvie was single, so was Ren, still her interest remained on him.

December still....I think....Possibly early January.



House Sitting!



Day one"

Kaze would peer in the fridge for a good ten minuets until handing a few pieces of Jerky to Jock. Sliding her fingers over a blue bottle she smirked. Pulling away from it, point one Kaze! Sober was how she'd start the day. Kaze looked down at Jock before moving with a ham and cheese wrap to the basement. Pressing her thumb to the lock as usual she slid inside, holding the door for the following dog.

There was a chime of a voice," Moring Ren Shimmerscale." A new alteration on Kaze's behalf, and she liked the name, liked the alias.

Smirking she took a bite out of the wrap as she moved to the computer. Rank on her shoulder as she looked down at her com badge she sighed. What did he have to go and give her that rank for" Still she liked the title, so it was okay' Guess she couldn't keep Wolvie on her bad side that long. Leaning in her chair, yup she loved that chair, she flicked a few switches and the scanning began. Kaze's blue orbs then did something odd. They scanned a set of envelopes.

Sliding them away slowly her head lowered. Wonderment yes, but still there was something more behind those letters and the meaning Kaze held for them, Ren held for them. Plucking one from the top of the pile she read it slowly with a smile. Tracing the words slowly, the only thing that seemed to keep her sane was in those words. Shifting again she looked back at the scanner as there was a beep. Arching a brow she leaned forwards, what once was there was gone. Folding the paper she tucked it back into its safe keeper before bending over the scanner as it continued its work.

Looking at her dog, who she felt was no dog at all, she shifted and leaned back with another bite taken from her wrap. There was a reverberation of words as they came through her head," Get some sun." Sun, ha! Ren lived for the night and its wonders. However something was wrong, the night held no joy for her recently, what was worse, her other parts, Sina and Kaze, wouldn't tell her what was going on. There was anger at them for that mistake, they knew something to her questions, but they weren't telling her. It was cold, it was cruel, and it was heart breaking, one thing Ren just couldn't take any more of.

Stepping up from her spot she nodded to Jock," Very well" he wants me to try his pool, why not." There was a large nod from Kaze as she moved towards the replicator. Tracing her fingers over it slowly she smirked lightly. Typing in a few things she began to wonder what things she could do with a week all to herself. That evil thought was pushed away in an instant. Kaze even wondered if some how she'd see Kas come through this house. Though she doubted it. Something told her Kas had issues of her own to deal with.

Ren soon was walking through the halls, now very thankful that she was alone. There she was sliding to the pool. A click of a silver arm band and a voice came as a figure appeared in thin air," Please state the nature of the medical emergency." The gift from Janeway, produced her beloved friend. The doctor turned and looked at her with a smile," Ren!"

For hours she would sit in that pool and talk to her friends. Soon he was her secret keeper, her shoulder for her tears, and even he had managed to make her laugh. However she did get some random chewing when he saw the scars on her body, one in her chest, the shape of a sun, and two more identical ones, one in her ribs, and one in her shoulder blade. Effects of a past, a life she didn't belong to.

Eventually Kaze would admit the pool was a good idea. Spite the puniness in her hands and feet Ren had enjoyed her solitude. Soon she was back down in the basement with her doctor friend, and fake dog Jock. Peering at the scanner and tilting her head," Well that's odd.?

Day five: Part One: Broken hearts, Dogs, Souls, and Merriments.



Ren was turning over a note in the great hall when he came in. Light saw her at once, which was not going to end nicely with his fate. As he approached with a greeting letter was stowed away. Ren did her best to greet and smile back, but when feelings for her came from his lips that kind smile fell from her face. Standing slowly she told him with an apologetic voice the truth told in every word. Her head shaking as she told him, she could not, would not, return his feelings.

Tormented by the sight of such a broken friend, she still made no move to comfort him. The blonde's mind moved to places unknown for a moment. To a fire place, table, and neglected letters, would he ever be back trailed over her mind then was shook away as a snowball hit her face. Light and his way of showing her all was fine, that with time he'd get over it, after all one month of knowing Ren could never make anyone love her. It took time, even for her and prince it was the same. Time had built their bond, granted it was a very rough beginning.

Seeing all to well that he was screaming, feeling stupid, and hurt because of Ren's rejection she lifted up with the lets be friends that men hate oh so much. Stupid or not it was the fate that a certain promise/ curse were in charge of. Love not loved, loved not loving. Only two men had ever gotten around that curse, one in love with someone else, and one" missing. Ren was okay with it though, Wolvie was her best friend and Prince, and well she didn't know where he was.

Still as he walked away she could have sworn she saw that angered look in his eyes" the one that showed pain in his own rejection or just the fact that maybe he was calling himself an idiot. Who knew" Ren sat there for a moment before with a poof of feathers she was gone.

Only time would tell if Ren had hurt Light beyond repair, but Ren meant what she said. Ren just couldn't return his feelings, which were that. He said he understood said he spoke up too late. In truth he was too late, but it was also because of fate that he'd always be late with Ren. Feelings would never really be returned for in truth she only ever had seen him as a friend.

The dream came in" like a wave to Ren, waking and eye opening as the horrific reminder rushed to her. There was a figure shrouded in candle light as it circled around her and a cased mold. Fingers folded into one another the figure prayed with all her might. Dark black eyes flickered as black hair sparkled fire red in the candle light. Light chants escaped her lips as she rocked back and forth. Chants fell from her lips now as she thrummed lightly.

There in the middle of the mold was a crystal crimson and dormant. Slowly a crack formed over it. Eyes flickered silver and black again. Fear then hate, as the flashes came over and over again. Then with a crash of high pitched screams the crystal shattered into an irreplaceable mass of shards. The figure lurched forwards, gripping her chest. Tears of blood formed in her eyes as her arms spread and back arched forwards. Louder her scream seemed to pierce the darkness as a silver vapor rushed from her chest. Churning black in the air" the abyss and its captive soul.

A soft white small vapor was next, but its path would wonder to where ever the path of Sina went. One figure was slouched and watching as the darkness seeped into the mold. It would have been so easy to kill it right then and there; it would have been so easy to destroy what ever was forming inside. A cold chuckle issued from inside it, what ever it was, it was evil" it wasn't right. Kaze had to destroy it, but she couldn't. Weak, feeble, and pathetic the hooded figure fell forwards.

Everything became black, everything dark. Next thing happened she was before Sam as tears rushed down her cheeks. His anger wasn't cared for, wasn't tolerated. Kaze was dying, Kaze was in pain. Chest burning from the triple split, something she hadn't planned nor asked for. In fact she hadn't asked for any of it that was Wrath who chose it.

Then there was the steaks again pushing through her figure as if it was butter. The soul ripped from her corpse as it found its way through nexus, and back to earth. Bound to a small green crystal and kept from the afterlife, Ren wasn't ready to go. She wasn't ready to leave Wolvie behind. Life was what she wanted and the crystal seemed to know it. Ren soon found a new way of life" as Akuma the teddy.

Lurching forwards Ren's hair fell over her face. Clutching her chest, she was glad no one was there to see the display. Gasping for breath and breaking out in a cold sweat her blue eyes glanced around. More and more she was afraid of what these dreams meant, but saw them as a step, more to the phases she must take. Ren was seeing this as it, last step in the truths ahead. More to waking, more to seeing the final product, more to returning to the Ren that was wanted and needed for her own reasons. Thus was the despair of Ren, things she wanted so far out of reach, things she needed she couldn't have, but this was seen as step one to defeating the curse.

There was a squeak as she gripped the roof top," Bad place to day dream!" Regaining her composure she traced the last touch of a flow of lights. With a slide off the roof top and a turn of her body she hovered down to the ground with a fluff of her wings. Once on the ground she licked her lips. Wings vanished with a twitch. Tilting her head to the side she took a step back and looked up.

The estate glowed with several different colors, blues, greens, reds, and yellows. Christmas was on its way and she had begun to wonder why Wolvie hadn't dressed up this place. Santa on the roof top with his reindeer glowed overly bright. Granted as she looked over at the other side of the roof top her eyes twitched. Kaze, her sister and original, had insisted that Mas Mas be added to the flair, so there was a dancing cow on the roof top.

Groaning she looked at the deer in the lawn glowing gold as candy canes lined the path way from the gates. Green reefs were settled on the gateways as other sets of garlands wrapped around every bar and the stone walls. Nothing was left undecorated for that was her way. Ren seemed to have even put decorations on the inside, but that would be a different look.

Gold and crimson lined the windows and as she walked inside the green garland spiraled on the rails of the stairs. Lights were around every door way and glowing golden or red. A massive Christmas tree was in every room. Stars on top of each, there were enough angels in this place. Besides Ren was festive none the less, one of those things never really shown when she lacked the confidence. Over the entrance of the door was "Welcome Home!" though Ren wasn't sure she'd be there to welcome them. Still she'd be in the basement for quite some time.

The last scan' troubled her greatly. More then enough to send word to Wolvie she didn't know. Word was given however that she wanted to see the Xavier even if it was for an hour. Hope above hope that she'd get to see old friends seemed to grow in her. Twisting in her spot she turned to look down at the scan as she arrived in the basement. There was an arch of her brow, Wolvie was coming home today. She should be here to give him this message, to inform him of what she was seeing. Was this good" Was this bad" Ren didn't know.

Still she went ahead and sent word through. There was semi urgent news, but nothing too pressing. The scans had her worried, but they seemed to have kept their position of worry a great distance away. Tapping her thumb on the console she looked around. The basement, home sweet home, still there was that one thing she had forgotten. Slowly she stood and made her way to the lift. Out she went and looked up at those stairs. Step after step she moved over and down to an end of the estate she hadn't traveled since her first day at the estate.

Opening the door labeled "Ren's Room' there was a steady step in. A breath was made as she looked around. Not since her time behind the force field, not since being called a murderer, and not since she had met Jock had she been in this room. Ren looked around for a moment, simple, light, and her to a tee, it was empty. Loneliness took her over and she moved over to the window. Pressing her head to the cool glass she shook her head. A tear in her eyes, yes, why was she always so pathetic"

Ren lowered her head to look at her hand. Earth angel in her head, but the voice that sang it was missing. That angel was tormented, stay or move on, fight or give up, or hope and be heart broken. There was no going against how she felt, the first man of her life was her best friend, and the second man in her life was missing. Then there was that hope for a happy ending. Ha! Ren knew somehow there was no prospect of a happy ending. Coming to terms with that was another step.

Truth be told Ren needed to stop seeing life as a fairy tale, as a dream that might come true. Pathetic. One word said it all, said how Ren was Ren, the hole, the void growing constantly. There was a hollow set of eyes peering out the window as the bottle lifted and golden ale drifted down her throat. Ren was a mess and she knew it. Ren saw no point in making herself look better in anyone's eyes, for now she was on phases near the end. The last bounding hurdle coming closer and closer as Ren returned to Ren.

Timid, cowardly, stupid, pathetic, and weak! All of her, Ren as a person. How could she look at herself and not see that, not even willing to fight for anything anymore, for in her eyes all was lost. Again Ren was stuck, trapped on the side lines. Still that was just fine with Ren, thought of even taking on Aly's offer seemed to grow in her, but what would happen when Ren spilt her guts. How would she be seen then" No confidence at all, yup that was Ren.

Snow was falling, dropping to the ground like the cries inside of her. Self loathing grew and grew with no sight in end. Was that why Ren was always so eager to help" Then there were those words to that girl Ada" Was Ren really so eager to die" It was a horrified thought. No, Ren didn't want to die, she was joking when she said those words. Damn it why was there so much thought in her these days. Was it was because her eyes were opened" Was it because Ren had nothing left but thought' Was it because Ren had no one to share them with' Dumb questions asked, Ren knew the answers? yes, yes, and yes.

There was that bottle in her hands. Rum to be exact and it was part of the process of self loathing. Looking down at it she looked towards the contents, half full, and then at herself in the window. Sad enough she was starting to look like Fred. It was odd she hadn't seen him in about a week, odd enough he always seemed to cause questions in her. Suzie, ha, that was great. Some how that in itself was a turn off. Moving towards the bathroom she made a point to move to the sink.

Turning the bottle upside down she watched as amber contents turned down the drain. Perhaps Hina was right in cutting her off, but then again news of Hina was even more entertaining then rum. That news seemed to make her tickled pink. The fact that Hina was so clueless made her laugh more. Each morning that she visited she was sicker then a dog. Poor Jester he was going to be in for the trip of a lifetime. There was going to be a little monster in Rhy'din!

Ren was yet again going to be a granny. That alone was great. Hina however had to be eased into the whole issue, nicely, after all when Ren told her she argued the point. Then she took the test, another advantage to technology in the Estate, Ren backed up the finding with her own scan. When that little tidbit was discovered Hina of course went green. Ren slinked off and there was Skid oh the prospects of telling him. They seemed so juicy. Still Ren kept her mouth shut that was Hina's place to tell, she was busy with making a business prospect.

The manor was next on the decoration list. Turned into a holiday Christmas card like the Estate was. Smack dab in the middle of the city almost it glowed brightly. Granted there was more detail here then at the estate, but that was because this was home away from home for Ren. In fact half of what she owns stays here, the other half at the estate. It wasn't that Ren didn't love the Estate it was home to her as well, but she had a feeling sooner or later she would have to leave the Estate for the manor. Just a gut feeling really, that and she didn't think there would be much arguing.

There was a long drawn sigh as she looked out the window of the manor. The fire billowing, the chair they sat in empty. Ren flicked her wrist as she thought. To wait here all day or not' Ren was sick of waiting, it didn't help her one bit. If he didn't show up in the next week she was going to start looking. That blonde had to find him, there had to be an answer on why he slipped off into the night. There just had to. Ren wanted to find out as well.

It was settled, Ren would give him one week then come looking. That was the plan, Christmas coming she could handle that, and then if nothing came up she'd be off. Ren just had to know he was alright. Had to it was driving her insane. That wasn't entirely a good thing either. The last time Ren's mentality was at stake Price was there to counter that. Wolvie had gone missing, then again Aly was around then so she understood. The only cure for her mentality had just been poured down the sink at the Estate.

Oh well she still had the inn. A few drinks there and she might just forget her troubles. Ahh, but Icer and her mate made Ren's day. They granted her wish with ease. As snow white wings spread out her black her body transformed to the black dragon she was now prowling the streets as. Less known form it was, easier to travel during the day. Clicking her claws she looked at the Estate from the gates. So much to do and so little time. There was too little time for all the day required. As she slipped inside she grumbled lightly with a flick of her tail. Dragon Ren, had a nice ring. Ren loved magic.

Ooc Note:: It should be known here and now that Dark Prince and Earth Angel did not work out. To go into detail would be easy, but I'm not. Just safe to say Ren and him came to a mutual understanding that they needed to part their ways. Thus another gain in the curse of Ren.



"Earth Angel to Bad ass, Earth Angel to Bad Ass, The squad is ready and good to go' Angels are on the prowl." Ren grinned as she looked from Hina trusted friend and adopted daughter to Hitomi, all three had their wings flaring and ready to go. Two sets of white and one feathered set of black, the angels were ready to play.

Hina rolled her eyes and snickered lightly," You're sad you know that Ren" Angels are on the prowl" Lame." There was a light wave of her hand as she looked at the silver tinsel on it. Hina, silver beauty with black wings and a devilish smirk, one that seemed to fit her new look quite well. Granted she had changed immensely with a few people's help, but still Hina was Hina over and over, actually it was quite disturbing now a days.

Hitomi Urameshi, adopted daughter or Ren and Hina's twin sister was a different story. Her white wings were a gift, from her ex none the less. Still she worried about that git Jak from time to time, even wondered where the hell he had wondered off to. Still as Hina's words rolled from her mouth she couldn't help but laugh wildly," She's right Ren" that was pretty lame."

Ren rolled her eyes as her own white wings with the very dark outline twitched. Leaning back against a wall she gave the two sisters the shut the hell up look. Turning to look at her watch she spoke softly," You two know what to do right?" Blue eyes looked around; she was still short one blasted person, her demon, where the hell was he still"! It was starting to make her a nervous wreck.

Hina saluted from her spot over to Ren," Yeah, I'm twisted Angel" and Hito here is?" Looking over at Hitomi she tilted her head," What the hell are you again?" There was another snicker as she covered her mouth and peered around the corner. Hina was too good at being mad when needed.

Hitomi groaned and rolled her blue eyes as she flicked some blue strands from her face. Speaking with a frown," I'm Mother Angel you half wit' Honestly' Skid has scrambled your brain." That fact was obvious about Hitomi, after all she had a son and well, she had a daughter. Her son was off in Atlantis, though his children had some how found their way back from that bubble world.

Ren nodded and spoke back into her communicator," Earth Angel to Bad Ass" We're good to go." The sisters may have been but still there was Ren, ever nervous and worried. Would this go as Wolvie had hopped? Only time would tell.

Highly amusing January post....

Moonshine is my worst enemy, Vodka is by far my best friend.

Jan. 19th 2008: Was when it was first posted.



Where to start, I know it's been a while but hey can't blame me for having the worst bits of my life in a month can you? I suppose we should start with Talon and I, well I did some thinking and realized it wasn't fair to him if I couldn't return his feeling for me now could I" Oh well. He's letting me stay at the manor though, cause I'm not quite ready to go back to the Estate and I'm sure as hell not going to stay at the embassy. That just won't work for me. Kaze and I don't exactly amount to good blood when it comes to staying in a room for more then a day.

Jock doesn't seem to mind the room change and my room does look great. Talon said he understands, that I need to find myself and I'm doing it. I've decided that from now on I'm only doing things I want, I think that's the best way to go. I just have to weave out a few kinks here and there, but hey I'm working on it. Other then that there's always the issue of Wolvie and Aly, that still bothers me, but I guess I have no choice seeing as how he and her are life mates. Still sounds odd, but I'll get over it with due time.

Icer's been ill recently and it's worrying me to death. I know she says one of our sister's is missing so I'm looking into it. It seems as the elections get closer that more and more Rhy"Din seems to be getting worse. Didn't think they were that important, but then again that's why I'm not the one running for the position. Oh well I know something good will come out of it eventually. Though it still bothers me that one of my sisters has gone missing and no one seems to care or notice. I'm not going to just forget about it either.

Hey then there's this thing with Gabe, it's bugging me, I can't stop thinking about it and what might happen if something happens. Bah, I'm just going to push it aside for now. Moonshine seems to be the worst thing for me but Amber is just so sweet, she even brought me two bottles of it and wanted to have a picnic right there in the dead of night. She's the best really. I was absolutely sloshed apparently and moments later was sobered up by a dip in the lake. It wasn't fun, it was cold, it was wet, and it was in the dead of winter. Gabe saved me so I guess I can't be too baffled by anything now can I" Oh well pushing that thought aside again!

Vodka however, I'll get to that in a moment. There's this fellow named Frank that seems to be an all around great guy, I can't argue with that at all for some reason I can't stop thinking on the talking I did with him. It was a good chance for me to think on a few things and set my mind in order. The bonus is he's got green eyes, why must I always be a sucker for the green eyes, honestly' We spent hours talking at the tea shop before we decided the soft tea and coffee thing just wasn't for us. That's when we moved to the hall for a quite atmosphere and a few drinks of well, Vodka. I drink that stuff and things seem to be happening all wonderful like.

To think I was all pouty and sobby a few hours ago is like having to do a recount for votes. It's just hard to believe that one night of just talking to someone and taking a step back from it all could really help. He's even offered to teach me how to shoot a rifle, which is quite new to me, I'm used to hand guns and side arms, even a blade, but an assault rifle in my hands" Sounds well" Kinky to say the least. The whole time I was wondering what to wear...That just seems, well odd, cause I've never worried about that before.

Tomorrow I'm gonna pack lunch or dinner when ever he chooses to teach me and make sure plenty of fantastic things are made. I don't know why I feel I need to impress, granted we did agree it sounded more like a date then a lesson. He says he wants to try and drink a dragon under the table, I told him to dress comfortable because I don't go under alone. For what its worth I had fun when I was done sobbing over my own pathetic existence, for what its worth I didn't even think of the curse. I was just myself for once. And that never seems to happen.

There are just too many thoughts on my mind right now and for once, I'm smiling because I know that the direction I'm going is going to be a blast. I'm having fun with just taking life a day at a time and for once I think I'm going to enjoy it. Probably not as much as I did spending time talking with Frank, but I know that if I keep having fun here and there, I might just get along just fine. Who knows.

Toodles!



And we're making it to the end again!