Topic: Act VII: April 2013 - October 2014

Toby

Date: 2013-04-05 09:11 EST
The great Rhydin Snowstorm of 2013 has ended. (Hannibal, if we're being properly introduced.) Up in the northlands wherein live the St. Germain family, the thaw is due to come soon, and with it come the promises of many changes.

Toby and Tabitha have just celebrated their 5th anniversary.
Maurin has just turned 4, Reinette is 2 and a half, and little Selene is now just over a year old - and no longer disappearing when she goes to sleep.

Guess that means things are finally going to be calm and serene for a while, right?

Riiiight.

So begins Act VII.

Toby

Date: 2013-05-01 11:36 EST
It wasn't long after Selene was born, just over a year before, that Toby and Tabitha both started to notice something about their home. The cabin, built by Toby some 6 years prior, had been built as his own sanctuary, away from the world. And it had and remained a wonderful example of such a retreat.

But now, it was starting to feel smaller than ever. The two of them, three little girls, three dogs and two kittens, made for a little more than the cabin was ever really meant to hold. And it would only get worse when those three little girls grew up, and the fighting over the bathroom began!

For some months, Toby and Tabitha had bandied around ideas about how to deal with the problem. An addition to the cabin was the most frequently revisited suggestion, but it wasn't really clear how well the structure would handle one. With the onset of little Selene's 'illness', then, the entire conversation was pushed off to the side indefinitely.

Now, however, a new year had begun. The family was enjoying the last vestiges of winter (which lingered up in their northern location far longer than the City), and once again, the two of them began to talk about the family and the cabin.

"Wouldn't be nice if you could just wave a wand and make it a bigger cabin?" Tabitha had joked once, as they sat watching the fireplace crackle. In front of them, Maurin played with her electronic sketching pad, while Reinette lay half-asleep with one of her baby dolls. Next to the couch, Selene was snoozing happily in the hand-carved bassinet.

Toby hadn't answered her for a while, and eventually she poked him in the ribs good and hard. "Hey now. I'm not going to be the only person awake in here, you know."

He shook his head slowly, eyes still out the window. Tabitha stretched sideways to look as well. "See something?"

"Mmmhmm."

Another mildly annoyed poke. "Well? Are you going to share, or do I have to poke it out of you?"

Toby chuckled faintly, but then went serious again. "I was looking across the clearing. Y'know, just before the slope down to the lake."

"What about it?"

"Just thinking. It would make a nice spot for a house, wouldn't it?"

Toby

Date: 2013-05-01 11:52 EST
Tabitha's expression was a priceless combination of surprise and confusion. "Wait, what? A house? Like.. a big house?"

"Well, this is a small house, or a big cabin, but either way, um.. yeah." Toby nodded. "What do you think?"

Now she in turn fell silent, staring out the window curiously. The cabin stood, as it always had, atop a gently slopping hill overlooking the lake below to the north. Toby had sited it there specifically to avoid any flooding dangers during the rainy season, and this had proved a wise move more than once over the years.

To the west of the lake, there was a great wide expanse of the clearing that stretched north, west and south to the only road leading from the clearing. There was indeed a lot of space there, west of the lake, but Tabitha voiced the obvious concern right away.

"What if the lake rises again, like two years ago? It almost got up to the garage here, and it did cover some of where you're talking about building a house."

Toby gestured with his free hand, the other arm wrapped snugly around his wife. "Well, the answer would be to do it like I did with the cabin."

A wry look and a poke. "I hate to point out the glaringly obvious, but there's no hill over there. Unless it's a magical invisible hill."

"Right. So, we make one."

A blink. "Make one."

Toby nodded, quite seriously. "Look, we just build up a hill, make sure that the earthworks have proper drainage and grass to keep everything from sliding. It only has to be high enough to avoid the high-water mark from two years ago, and that won't be hard. Plus I can add in some equipment to help drain away any water that comes too high, and that lets us have a basement and a garage like the cabin has."

Tabitha shifted on the couch and looked at him. "Sounds to me like you've put a lot of thought into this. When were you planning on telling me, mm?"

A low chuckle. "Been waiting for the right time?" Then serious again. "I started doing a little thinking after New Years passed. We definitely need more space, and there's a perfect location for a house, a big one. I started poking around at possible design concepts, but then I hit on the same problem you saw, the flood risk."

Tabitha looked at him, bemused. "So your solution was just 'make a hill'?"

"Well, actually I got that idea from one of the customer's at Star's End, fellow named Cooper. It's not like I don't have access to the technology to do that kind of earthworks, and if we're going to go through turning things upside down in the name of expansion... well, let's really do it right."

There was a contemplative silence for a while now, as both of them stared out the window at the invitingly empty grasslands beyond the window. A silence broken only by Maurin and Reinette starting to argue over who got to play with the sketchpad next. And inevitably, this would awaken Selene, who had her own strident opinion on her sisters' loud squabbling.

Toby

Date: 2013-05-29 20:17 EST
Nearly a month had passed, and the clearing was starting to look somewhat different than it had before. Just west of the lake, up the slope somewhat, a huge (relatively speaking) area had been cleared and marked out. Careful surveying and some rented earthmover equipment had ensured that the ground was neatly levelled, and seismic and ground-radar surveys verified that the ground beneath was settled and solid for as far as they could scan.

The next step would be to 'build' an artificial hill on the site. It had to be laid out just right before any construction went up atop it, or else they'd find that hard work sliding and breaking as it settled. Building the actual hill would require some serious earthworks, though they would not need to trample the ground around the clearing with vehicle tracks. Toby already had the ideal vehicle in mind.

In the meantime, materials had to be ordered, and the plans finalized. Toby and Tabitha had roughed out a general design and floorplan, but it took a professional's touch to translate their ideas into workable blueprints that could be used to build a house.

At the same time, nearby, an older project was further ahead in its own timeline. The greenhouse had been an idea in limbo for several years now, but thanks to some good fortune at the scrapyard Toby had acquired enough retired hull material to build a big enough greenhouse to satisfy every green thumb notion the two of them had ever had. The glass was another story, but Toby was following up some leads on that as well.

The foundations (at least the metaphorical ones) were laid. Now it was time to call in some assistance.

Toby

Date: 2013-06-10 22:50 EST
The hillside was far out of the way, off the beaten path, pick any number of descriptive phrases. Out in the barren lands that few walked, in the extreme north, it was once fairly symmetrical - but now, in the aftermath of a heavy rain, following the melted snow of Hannibal, a landslide had pulled down a large portion of it, leaving a ragged mess on the edges of the mountains.

The hillside fell into shadow, as a shape high above it induced an artificial eclipse. The land around it sudden shook with the report of thunder, and everywhere birds could be seen taking wing from tree and bush. The air was hazy with ions, electrons ripped free from their parent atoms by the passage of energies not meant for use in the sweet realm of atmosphere.

The use of shipboard weapons in atmo is a polarizing topic for spacers. Some think it's ecologically irresponsible, some say it's just energy, just physics at play. Whatever you want to call it, it left its mark today as the Lady's particle cannons blew the hillside apart, leaving a mass of pulverized stone and dirt, collapsing in on itself. A jumbled mass that was suddenly hauled up into the air by the invisible net of a tractor field, and borne across the sky to a clearing in the woods far away. There it would take up its new role as an artificial hill upon paristeel, permacrete and various other materials would be mixed, mingled, combined and somehow form... a home.

Epilogue

For the environmentally outraged, it would be worth noting that a year hence, anyone coming across the site of that ruined hillside would find a slightly concave little dell, covered over with grass and some apple trees, each one planted by a pair of little hands (or in the case of little Selene, by Mommy's hands). And hey, who doesn't like apples?

Toby

Date: 2013-06-12 11:39 EST
Gradually, the rising mini-mountain of dirt and rock began to be shaped and landscaped, becoming more natural, more harmonious with the rest of the land around it. Every day, they were outside working - running the heavy machinery rented from the spaceport. The work crew varied - various friends of theirs would come in at whiles to help out, including Wyheree and Roran, Xenograg, Sissy and Warren, and Todd and Selene.

Where once existed a flat patch of grass, indistinguishable from the rest of the great clearing, now rose a graceful hill - twin to the one southeast of it where the cabin sat. It was all still bare earth, as the work continued, but it would be some time before anything would be allowed to grow on it. Once the landscaping was finished, then the foundation work of the house would resume (as well as the 'underground' portions, including the large garage and the machinery rooms. Having a home out in the middle of nowhere didn't necessarily mean a lack of amenities, after all - and Toby had sketched out designs for a self-contained power plant, water distillation to replace their old and faithful well, and other such utilities.)

After all, if you're going to do something? Go all the way.

Toby

Date: 2013-08-06 09:54 EST
The entirety of the new hill lay in shadow; the massive disc-shape of the Lady hovering not fifty feet above it, her repulsor drives causing the very air to vibrate in protest as gravity was violently defied. The loading ramp was down and the main cargo bay doors open - very slowly, a gigantic anti-grav pallet was being moved down that ramp, attached to tethers and braces. One learned very quickly, in space or within an atmosphere, that unsecured cargo meant shifting cargo - and that was inevitably hazardous, if not outright fatal.

The pallet slowly swayed as it began to descend towards the ground below. On it sat a massive piece of machinery, squat and bulbous, with a series of pipe outlets extending from one side. As it lowered, a figure on the ground adjusted the long tripod-mounted tube towards it, and a beam of force rippled out, steadying the swaying behemoth.

With infinite care, pilot and ground crew combined their efforts to gradually, gently lower the gigantic hulk ... thirty feet...twenty-five... fifteen... ten... five...

WHUMP

As lashings were unmounted, the ship slowly moved off to land some distance away.

~~~

TBC

Toby

Date: 2013-09-19 17:36 EST
TWO WEEKS PRIOR.....

There were some really great things one could do with the proper application of technology. For example, the airspace over the acreage owned by the St. Germains was protected by a multi-layered defensive system, and augmented by orbital protections - part of an old 'agreement'. In theory, it was possible a ship might be able to invade that airspace and land in the clearing, but only if it was able to utilize a mind-bendingly complex series of access codes.

The Lady had such codes, and she descended out of the night sky to make her landing on the grassy clearing not too far from the cabin. There was some activity on the ground, too far to be made out from a distance. After a while, the lights in the cabin went dark, and the ship rose again from her crouch, and angled up into the sky.

At the Star's End Bar's manager's office, an email winked into Jeremy Kane's inbox:

FROM: St. Germain, T.
TO: Kane, J.
SUBJECT: Medical leave

Mr. Kane,

Due to my wife's worsening and nonresponsive condition, and having exhausted all known medical options here on Rhydin, I am going to fly her out to the Galactic Core to seek additional medical advice. I apologize for the sudden notice, but things took a turn for the worse recently and I am afraid to wait much longer.

My family is going with me, and I will contact you as soon as I know more. If you need to reach me, I can be contacted via my usual GalNet address proxy.

-T

((Due to various reasons, Toby has been absent for the past two weeks - this should explain why, and where he will be for a while longer.))

Toby

Date: 2013-09-30 19:27 EST
Nearly a month after the lights had gone dim in the little cabin in the woods, a shooting star could be seen in the sky above that far northern region. The Lady had returned from her weeks-long sojourn in the Core systems, and before too long, the sounds of children's voices could be heard echoing joyfully in the clearing as they returned to the only home they'd ever known.

This time, though, an extra visitor was along for the visit. If the truth was known, the trip hadn't produced quite the results Toby had hoped for - now a live-in nurse would be staying with them, caring for the reclusive and ill Tabitha. Dread had gripped his heart as he had listened to the little girls racing about their home and laughing, a dread he'd kept carefully away from them. There was nothing to gain by telling them the full truth - he'd put that duty off as long as humanly possible.

But that night, when they were asleep and (thanks to a combination of medications, so was poor Tabitha), Toby stood outside on his porch, staring out at the moonlight rippling over the lake's surface. That lake had been the catalyst for their reunion nearly seven years before. It seemed so much more ominous now, as he saw the moons' reflection broken up and distorted.

What do I tell them?

Toby

Date: 2014-01-06 11:14 EST
(Reposted from the Through the Woods folder, as it directly involves the Act VII story)

(The soundtrack for this scene is here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bbS-Zhz31CA )

The evening of the second day, Toby approached the back bedroom's door quietly, peering at the half-lit room beyond. Tabitha was a slender shape under the covers, and to his eyes she seemed frail, almost gossamer. Always such a lush and healthy woman, it seemed to him as if she was just fading away bit by bit, like a dandelion in the breeze.

The shape stirred, and her voice reached his ears, faint and shaky. "Toby?"

He shifted slightly. He hadn't meant to disturb her and yet this moment had to come. He put on that apologetic, boyish smile and moved into the room. "Hey sweet pea. You behaving in here?"

A faint smile creased her face, as she shifted up a little against the pillows. "Why, are you going to tell on me?"

"It'll be our little secret." As he said this, Tabitha's eyebrows drew down slightly, and she slowly tilted her head. "What?"

She looked at him, saying nothing.

"Tabi, you're giving me that same look you give the girls when they pretend they don't know who snuck cookies off the plate."

"Mmmhmm." She smiled then, tiredly. "So tell me what it is you're not telling me, then."

"Hey. I thought I was the telepath here." Toby slowly sat down. It didn't really surprise him, though. Tabitha had an unerring way of knowing what he was thinking, as well as the girls. He wasn't sure if it was a gift.. or just *her*. So he told her the whole story, of Murelle, of the Dark Forest, of the being of shadow, of his meeting with Queen Teleperien of Eldicor, of Xenograg's request. And he told her of the devices he built.

"If you've decided... why do you still look so lost?" She was weak, impossibly so, but Tabitha hadn't lost her perception yet.

"If I go... I may not come back. I want to do what's right.. but.. what if I don't come back? What if I leave you, like this.. and the girls? What happens then? I can't just leave my responsibilities to you... you all come first."

Tabitha waited with her usual gentle patience until he'd finished rambling, and then answered. Toby noted, though, that she was taking longer to draw the breath to answer. "You'll come back."

"How can you know that? What if I don't? If I'm gone.. and you're..." Toby's voice broke, he found himself unable to finish the sentence.

"But you will come back. It's what you do, it's what you always do." Tabitha took a moment to gather her strength. "You have to do what's right, Toby. You can't be any other way, you don't know how. And I'm no afr-," she paused, seized by a terrible coughing fit.

"I'm not afraid. You'll come back, and I'll be f-fine."

He looked her sadly. "I wish I could be so sure as you are. I have a terrible feeling."

"Oh, Toby. That's because sometimes, smart as you are, you really are a dummy." She looked so solemn when she said this, before the ghost of a smile crept over her face. Then Tabitha's face contorted again, seized in the throes of a coughing fit that lasted almost a full minute. She grimaced, drawing her sleeve over her lips, not noticing that it left a dark streak.

Toby did notice, but stifled his immediate reaction. "You need some more water." His hand shook slightly as he took her glass from the nightstand and headed for the kitchen. Behind him, her voice trailed out, shaky but with a teasing tone. "And maybe a new lung if you've got one handy."

He smiled as he refilled her glass, then his expression turned stricken as he heard her coughing again, this time mixed with a slightly panicky wheeze as Tabitha tried futilely to draw breath. He started back to the bedroom, his steps turning quicker as the coughing fit would not subside.

Mirali, the nurse, was already coming in from where she had been taking a few moments break. The sound of the coughing had drawn her, and she immediately set to work trying to assess the situation. It didn't take her long.

"She has fluid in her lungs, too much. She's drowning. We have to get her to a hospital, now." She was saying something else too, but Toby didn't even hear her. His thoughts, his perception, were drawn to his wife, and to the warm glow, the aura of her, that was such a central part of his life. But it had a new tinge to it now... a shadow. Toby was no doctor, but he knew what he was seeing.

Tabitha was dying. Right in front of him.

Toby

Date: 2014-01-06 11:16 EST
(Reposted from the Through the Woods folder, as it directly involves the Act VII story)

The mind is a funny thing, sometimes.

Everything that was going on, from the moment Tabitha had begun that panicky wet coughing, just seemed to slow down for him. Mirali's immediate concern, the sounds of the coughing, everything just seemed to come to a slow creep as he stood there.

Tabitha was dying. Such a simple realization. Such a simple phrase, and with it his entire world was threatening to come to an end. It was like watching himself watching her, from someplace else. It was something happening to someone else, a movie or a vid that he was watching of events somewhere else, far away.

He thought of his girls, Maurin, Reinette.. little Selene. They were upstairs sleeping now. Lost in the dreams of little children, they had no idea that their mama was slipping away from them.

He saw the next morning, when they would come downstairs as they always did, to pile into "Mama's new room" and wake her up with kisses. He turned away, unable to watch what came next.

The world turned grey, a church in the rain, a crowd of solemn friends and adopted family. Three little figures standing next to him, unable to understand. Tears on their cheeks, tears on his... all but lost in the rain.

A little space in the corner of the clearing near the cabin, four flowers laid side by side by the new stone. And a statue, set at the head of the space, of a woman smiling down at them. A beautiful statue, but cold and unchanging, that had nothing to do with Tabitha St. Germain.

And he saw his life, equally cold and grey, even as he forced himself to go on for his daughters. No more laughing, no more smiles. No warm presence when he opened the door, no teasing laughter that washed away the problems of the day. No soothing presence that calmed the rampaging tempest within his mind, the storm that had tortured Toby since he was old enough to perceive it. A storm that had abated only when he'd met her... his other half. His sanctuary from the chaos.

Cold. It was a good word, it suited every aspect of this future memory. It suited him, he could feel that coldness spreading through his heart even now. The scene around him was almost frozen now, as if he'd stepped outside of it to see this terrible future laid out.

In another moment, or in another lifetime, she would be gone. It wasn't fair. It wasn't fair to the girls, it wasn't fair to those who loved her.

It's not fair to me. It's not fair!

It's not FAIR.

Toby

Date: 2014-01-06 11:20 EST
(Reposted from the Through the Woods folder, as it directly involves the Act VII story)

Toby saw that cold and grey future stretched out for him, laid out as sure as a map carved in stone. He saw what was about to happen, what must happen. It was a mathematical certainty, and he of all people understood the inevitability of mathematics.

Tabitha was on a path that had only one end, her end. Whatever was killing her, was going to do it long before they could figure out how to cure it. There was no time to save her, pure and simple.

No time..

Anguish gripped him, regret and recrimination - what if he'd taken her to the Core sooner? What if he'd searched wider for someone who would see what was killing her? What if he hadn't taken so much time in useless 'wait and see'?

No time..

Maybe if she could hang on a little longer, the answer would come to him. Maybe he could find the one doctor who would see the truth of it. If only he had a little more time.

More time..

Toby shook his head fiercely, bitterness in his thoughts.

You can't leave them..

You can't leave me...

Please... please, don't go... I just need more time...

More time...

He could see back over the six and a half years they'd been together, and all the joy they'd lived together. All that time, and it had run by so fast... where had it gone?

Time..

Toby

Date: 2014-01-06 11:21 EST
(Reposted from the Through the Woods folder, as it directly involves the Act VII story)

The word echoed in his thoughts, mocking him. Time.. you always think you have a lifetime's worth, and then it's all gone. Suddenly you realize you don't have any time left at all.

He saw all of this. And he saw something more. She was on a path with no forks, it could only end in one place. A river with no dock to paddle to, nowhere to stop. She could no more stop herself than a leaf on the river can fight the current.

She couldn't. But ..

"No."

The word came with difficulty, as if he had forgotten in that interval of inner time how to speak. Or maybe he had finally found the word he wanted, after a long search. In the real world, Toby remained motionless, frozen. But here, in the space between, that cold darkness in his chest had continued to collapse in on itself, building up, and feeding on itself. And he realized in the space of one heartbeat that he... could.

He couldn't change her path. But he could do something else.

Toby had only that one heartbeat to decide. And in the end it was no decision at all. He reached out, and held her. Held her to him. And her path, still unbroken, became an unending loop of those last few moments.

Even as the decision was made, he heard Mirali finishing her sentence.

"-put her on a breathing machin-... wait.. what in God's name..?"

Toby finished the blink that he'd begun seemingly ages ago. He turned slowly to look at the nurse, who was staring in confusion at Tabitha. "What is it?"

The nurse didn't seem to recognize the calm tone that had come over him. She looked at her scanner probe in disbelief. "She was choking to death, right before my eyes. Now.. it's like she's settled down. But.. "

"But?"

"Her vitals.. they're... *wrong*. I can't tell if her heart rate is skipping, or what, it's like it starts to beat, then there's a sharp irregularity and then it's normal again. It's repeating, too. Almost... cyclical. Her breathing starts, then it also stops... and then normal again. It's almost like..."

Toby's voice was strangely patient. "Almost like what?"

The nurse turned to look at him. "Like she's in a holding pattern. I know it sounds insane, but..."

"She'll be fine for now." The nurse did stare at him now, at the almost unnatural certainty in his voice. He kept talking, ignoring her looks. "Go make sure the girls are sleeping soundly, would you please? I just want to be alone with her for a few minutes."

Mirali couldn't seem to find the words she wanted, but under the calm royal blue gaze she finally nodded and left the room. Toby turned and knelt at his wife's bedside, his voice becoming a gentle whisper.

"It was so simple. I should have seen it before, but I wouldn't open my eyes, kitten. You were right, you know.. sometimes I am just a dummy." He looked at her, and he almost smiled, his expression heartbreakingly sad. "But I know the answer now. I just need more time. And until we figure out how to make you better.. you have all the time in the world. Sleep and dream of me... of them... and I promise I'll come for you when I can."

"I love you, Tabi."

His hand rested on Tabitha's forehead, and he gently closed her eyes. His eyes, too, drifted shut, and he murmured inaudibly to her. Tabitha's lips moved in quiet response, and a ghost of a smile drifted over them before she went still.

Mirali came back downstairs as Toby was walking out of the bedroom. He looked at her, expression solemn. "You've been a great help, Mirali. I don't know what we'd have done without you. I need to take care of something tomorrow morning, I should not be gone very long. I've asked someone to come over and help take care of the girls till I get back. Please keep a close eye on Tabitha... take good care of her."

The nurse nodded slowly, unsure of what this strange calm meant. "How will I reach you if her condition changes?"

She stared after him as he walked to the loft stairs, confused by his quiet reply. "It won't."

Toby

Date: 2014-01-06 11:23 EST
(Reposted from the Through the Woods folder, as it directly involves the Act VII story)


Epilogue

Toby paused at the door of the girls' bedroom, hearing and feeling the questioning little presence from the middle bed. "You should be sleeping, princess."

Reinette's little blonde head peered at him from between covers and pillow. "I heard you talking. Can't go to sleep till you do, Daddy."

Toby smiled in the half-light. "I'm going up to bed now, Rennie. You cuddle up nice and snug, and have some sweet dreams.

" 'k. Love you, Daddy.."

"I love you too, princess."

He paused, her voice catching him as he turned away from the door. "Daddy? Is Mama sleeping now?"

Toby swallowed hard, unable to answer for a moment lest his voice break and betray too much to his middle daughter.

"Yes, sweetheart. Mama's sleeping now."

Toby

Date: 2014-01-06 11:44 EST
"Daddy?"

The little voice that issued from the bedroom doorway was almost too quiet to be heard. But a parent is uniquely tuned to the sounds of their children, even to the point of sometimes straining just to hear that they're breathing contentedly in their sleep. It was enough to draw his attention away from Tabitha's still form in the bed next to his chair.

Ever since returning from Eldicor, Toby had spent long periods of the day watching over her. Listening for any hint that something had changed. Hoping, perhaps, for a miracle.

Sometimes the girls would quietly sneak in and sit with him. They understood so little of what was going on, but nothing would keep them away from seeing Mama, asleep or not. No one ever said a word, either... like speaking would break the spell and Mama would disappear.

That's what made the little whisper even more surprising to him, as Toby looked up at little Selene, peering at him with her big sprite's eyes at the door. He held out his hand, but she was already toddling over to him by then.

Toby picked her up, set her on his knees, speaking very quietly. "What's wrong, peanut?" He could see something in the little girl's eyes, something beyond the usual gravitas they all shared when sitting here. It was enough to rouse him from his own shadowed thoughts.

"I had a funny dream, Daddy."

Toby stood up, picking Selene up to carry her out into the living room. "S'all right, peanut, it's just a nightmare. All gone now, right?" He kept his voice as light as he could, though anything with Selene and dreams made him nervous even now. It had been almost a year since the nightmare of her disappearances had ended, but it had never been forgotten.

But even as he said the words, Selene was shaking her head. Blonde at birth, her hair was slowly darkening into a soft coppery shade. It seemed like they were destined to have the full spectrum of colours in this family, he thought distractedly.

"No, Daddy. Wasn't a nimare. I had a dream." She was insistent on this, with all the seriousness a child could muster.

Toby moved over to sit on the old rocking chair, next to the door to the enclosed porch. Beat up, scratched up, nicked up and stitched up, it was probably the oldest piece of furniture they had. And of course, everyone's favorite.

"Ok, peanut, what kind of funny dream?" He felt a twinge of guilt, already. He hadn't been spending nearly enough time with the girls, and he could in his mind hear Tabitha scolding him for 'sulking at her bedside instead of making the girls smile.' That said, he wasn't nearly prepared for what came next.

"I dreamed about Mama. She's stuck, Daddy. An' can't get out."

Nothing short of a slap to the face could have gotten his attention so sharply as that simple phrase from a two-year old girl. His eyes snapped to Selene's, so different from everyone else's with their faint violet tinge.

"Mama's just resting, sweetheart. She's very sick, and needs to get better." He had told them this before, the closest he could explain the real truth to the girls. Once again, he was utterly unprepared for what Selene gave in answer.

"She's stuck, Daddy. She's crying, and no one can hear."

He could get no more out of her, as she curled against him in that timeless need for parental comfort. Bleakly, he thought to himself, "So who do I hug? Where do I go to feel better?"

Toby

Date: 2014-01-06 12:12 EST
The very next night, after dinner, Toby was washing everything up. Everyone took a turn 'helping' wash the dishes - though to be honest, when Selene helped, it was more in a supervisory capacity just yet. Reinette liked to delegate as well, it was in her nature. Maurin, though, took her chores very seriously - she made sure every dish was dried spotless.

Some of his friends had commented that it was oddly inefficient to wash and dry the dishes in such an old-fashioned way. It was particularly out of place considering Toby's love of technology and how he could probably build himself a fusion-powered recycler that wouldn't just clean the dishes, but rebuild them from a molecular level each time. Now that's clean!

All true, but there was a unique satisfaction to be found in this old-style chore. And it gave the girls a taste of responsibility, to put their own hands to use cleaning up what they'd all been eating off of earlier. It was also a subtle reminder that while technology can do most anything... it would never do to forget how to do something yourself.

There was usually banter during dish-washing time. Jokes, teasing, competition.. Toby and his oldest daughter were very much alike. Maurin loved the piano, loved technology, and was at age 5 already a promising tinkerer. She'd build a rather impressive junior trebuchet out in the yard the past summer, and the dogs and cats had quickly learned to stay near the cabin when she played with it. (Not for fear of becoming drafted into an ammunition role, Maurin loved her pets too much for THAT... but exploding dirt bombs made such a mess when you got near ground zero.)

Today though, as with so many days of late, things were quiet. Reinette was colouring at the table, while Selene was pretending to feed one of her little dolls on the couch. The only sounds were the scratch of crayons... the splash of dishware dunked into soapy water, the swish of a drying cloth, or the clink-clank of plates and silverware being set in the rack.

It was all the more surprising to him, then, when Maurin spoke up. She was in a very solemn phase lately, as if feeling she must be the mama figure to the other two in Tabitha's stead. She looked up at him, in mid-dry, and blurted out, "I'm afraid I'm gonna forget what Mama's voice sounds like."

It was fortunate that Toby hadn't picked up another dish, as he might well have dropped it then. He looked down at Maurin, eyes exactly like his own. She looked so serious, it was almost over the top. But it wouldn't do to tease her, not on something like that.

"You won't, Emmy. Once she's better, and she *will* get better... you'll get to hear her telling you to clean up your mess for years and years and years to come."

That almost got a smile. Maurin wouldn't be deterred, though. "I almost feel like I can hear her at night, calling out. I wanna keep listening, not go to sleep. But it's too quiet."

He reached and tweaked her nose gently. "You better be sleeping, you're gonna be starting school pretty soon. And I bet the teacher's not going to want you falling asleep in class. Put ice in your shoes, they will."

That did get the smile, and they went back to their dishes. It wasn't until later that night, that he realized something with a jolt.

For the second night in a row, one of his daughters had brought up hearing Tabitha calling to them.

Toby

Date: 2014-01-16 10:32 EST
Mid-January was always a glorious time up north. The snow was thick on the ground, like a flat white blanket sheeting the earth. Winter snow had its own particular smell, a clean and bracing scent that just felt more alive somehow.

The snow in the cleared had piled up over the past few months, to about three feet in height. Aside from the path Toby had cleared (and kept clear) from the cabin's underground garage to the road, it was indeed a winder wonderland. The girls had trampled and flattened some areas of their own to play in, not far from the porch, and Toby had cleared out a place for the dogs to do their own thing. (The two were not adjacent, needless to say.)

He stood on the porch now, in a thick jacket and gloves, watching the girls play in the snow. Right now, they were building a snowman, or trying to - Maurin was doing the bulk of the heavy lifting, while Reinette directed from a snowbank. Little Selene, wrapped up so heavily she was almost unable to move her arms, toddled around more or less doing her own thing. Duke and Duchess were inside - Duchess' pups were due before too long, and she didn't enjoy playing in the snow like usual. Duke still did, but rarely liked to leave her side. And the cats, well, they were happily curled up sleeping on the piano (a habit Toby heartily discouraged.)

Toby leaned against a porch beam, watching Maurin trying to move a snow 'boulder' almost as big as she was. It wasn't going well, but she'd never quit trying. Her determination could reach epic levels of stubborn, when she really wanted to do something. His eyes flickered to Reinette, and then paused.

She wasn't paying attention to her big sister's efforts anymore. She was staring off into the distance, into the white snowfield beyond the cabin, and her body language was utterly stilled. It was as though she was listening, no just with her ears, but with every fiber of her being.

But listening to what? Toby could hear nothing but that unique 'silence' you can only get with snow blanketing the world. There was the crunching sound of Maurin's boots as she stalked around gathering more snow, the occasional 'thump' as Selene toppled over (and was promptly brought back to her feet by her bigger sister), and the faint hum of the cabin's heater on the other side of the building.

Reinette, however, was staring the other way, into the white nothing that lay to the west. If she could hear something, it was beyond his ability to discern - and it seemed, beyond Maurin's or Selene's.

He almost spoke up, but after a few moments more, Reinette's shoulders slumped a little, and she was back to directing Maurin's building efforts. She didn't seem to pay it any more heed, though the slight frown remained on her father's face.

Toby

Date: 2014-02-10 22:41 EST
Ever dream of me?
-Nightwish, 'Ever Dream'

Nighttime has its own rituals when you have kids. There's the last snack of the day, the inevitable cries of "five more minutes, Daddy!" when some vital project just HAS to be completed, the dragging of little heels when Management overrules the requested extension.

Then there's the brushing of teeth, the pajamas, the tucking in and the stories. All told, quite a lot must come together for little ones to finally drift off into the world of dreams.

Adults, too, have their rituals. Scaled down, perhaps less hallowed with the cynicism of time, but they exist nonetheless. The late evening holovid or GalNet Tri-D news reports. The pretzel, cheese and pepperoni tray, and a suitable drink to go with it. The gaze out the window at the stars... a ritual begun in the earliest days of a misspent youth, and unbroken across nearly forty years.

And when sleep finally comes, sometimes the world of dreams waits for adults too. A place where, young or old, the wonders can be truly wondrous..

...and the terrors, truly terrifying.

Toby didn't dream often. He'd joked with friends that it was probably because he was always daydreaming about something as it was, there was nothing left for nighttime, that he'd used up all his thoughts by then. He knew better of course, but it sounded good.

Tonight, though, made up for many of those dark and silent nights. It felt like a montage of dreams, or a tapestry.. if he'd viewed his dream from above or beyond, he might think he was seeing a story told in his head. Her story. *Their* story.

A casual meeting in the Inn, more than seven years prior, hardly an obvious prelude to what they would become. A hair-raising motorcycle ride, screams of delight and terror mixed. An earthward plunge into a spring-chilled lake, out of nowhere. A slow familiarity rekindled, growing steadily into more. A wedding in the snow, simple and serene. Three beautiful little girls, each an echo of their parents love.

An echo of a perfect love, that ended wrong...
- Giant, 'I'll See You In My Dreams'

It was as though she were talking to him, the smile that was his and his alone still alive and warm. It was the kind of dream you never, ever want to awaken from, the kind that finds your eyes burning with tears when you DO awaken. Little pieces of conversations long past, gentle laughter that could fill the room. Through it, he wanted to hold her, keep her close.. but in the way of dreams, he could never quite *reach* her.

In time, even her voice seemed to fade away.. was it a prelude? A foreshadowing of what was surely to come, even despite his mad attempt at defying it? He strained to listen, but the dream was breaking up with the coming dawn. She was fading away, and all he could hear was one...no, two words..

And unlike most dreams, Toby awoke with those words still in his ears, sending his heart racing wildly.

Help me..

Toby

Date: 2014-02-24 20:26 EST
Midnight..

The cabin was quiet, still wrapped in its blanket of winter snow. While it was beginning to warm up slightly to the south, up in the shadow of the mountains it remained as cold as ever, and that white quilt would not melt for some time yet.

Inside, little souls slept in peace, and dogs sprawled contentedly on their favorite rugs. But in the main room, a small hurricane lamp glowed faintly at the table, and there sat Toby with his mind a-whirl.

There was no more doubting it, something was happening to Tabitha. She should not be able to interact with the world, not as she was. He knew, whether it be instinctive or something else, that she was frozen in that one moment of time. She shouldn't be ABLE to reach out from it. And yet...

Little Selene had dreamed of her.

Maurin had too, and Maurin was easily the most pragmatic of his children, she was not one to imagine things or get lost in dreams.

And Reinette had heard her. Little Rennie was the one Toby worried the most about, for she seemed to be the most sensitive of the three.

And now, he himself had finally heard her in his dreams. There was no longer any point in trying to explain it away. But what then? If he was wrong...

If he even could undo what he'd done (and Toby still had no idea exactly how to do that), and nothing had changed... then she would die right there, before he could stop it. There really was no margin for error.

The lamp continued to burn, flickering slightly. Even when dawn crept over the trees outside, it burned. And still he sat there.

Thinking.

Toby

Date: 2014-08-09 22:24 EST
(OOC:

The story is just on hold for now. Since the storyline of the Battle of the Dark Forest in Eldicor is still ongoing, I decided to pause here with this SL until that one is complete. The reason for this, is that there are many things that will be happening in the Dark Forest, some of which will change Toby forever. And until they happen, and the writing is all done, I cannot be 100% 'in the right mindset' as him. I want to be sure that when I write, I'm taking into account everything that's happened to him so far.

So bear with me, O gentle readers, just a little longer. Once the Battle concludes, then Act VII will resume!)

--BW

Toby

Date: 2014-08-12 16:02 EST
OOC:

This post is to bring the Acts into chronological order, with the addition of Act III.

Toby

Date: 2014-09-15 23:36 EST
( This song, and its lyrics, fully connect with the mood of this post.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZttcMBn7Q6g
"Forever Autumn", by Justin Hayward. )

Like the sun through the trees, you came to love me..
Like a leaf on the breeze, you blew away....


Spring wore on, gradually turning into summer. By day, life went on.. and there were little moments of happiness, as there must be when children life and play at home. But never was she far from their minds.. the beloved woman known as Tabitha.. or simply Mama.

Echoes of her remained in every room, hints and memories and glimpses of moments gone by. Every day, the girls came in to her, to give her silent, sniffly hugs, and kiss her good night. And Toby, who had barely left her side over the winter months, still stayed by her bedside every night.

For a long time, after those initial strange dreams, the echoes of her had fallen silent. But every so often, someone would wake up, disoriented in the night.. sure they had heard her long-silent voice. Each of them felt it at some point, but little Selene most of all.

During the spring and summer months, Toby had kept working on the house - partly because it had to be done, and partly because it kept his mind off of the gnawing failure to reach any breakthrough. No one knew that while he sat silently at her bedside, he was lost in deep thought... seeking out some answer as to how to make it right. An answer that had so far eluded him.

But while Toby had become a hermit, rarely leaving the sanctuary of their lands (as he had just before Tabitha had come back into his life), he and the girls had not been forsaken. There had been others who had made a point of coming by to visit - Wyheree and Roran. Selene and Todd. Helix, Sissy and Warren. And Xenograg, who like Toby had his own scars and memories to deal with after the battle in Eldicor.

Sometimes they would just pop by, one or two at a time, to visit and see the girls. Helix frequently showed up with entire loads of her cooking for everyone, and usually brought Sissy and Warren with her. At those times, the sound of laughter would once again echo over the lakeside.. a reminder that life did in fact go on.

Toby and Xenograg often sat on the porch and talked while the girls played. After all... in the aftermath of the Black Forest, much had changed. And now the two men had much to say to one another.

Wyheree and Roran were a little more scarce, but by no means due to lack of care. Toby knew well what they sought to accomplish, and their efforts took them on long trips to distant lands, seeking the answer to their prayers.

Todd and Selene were a frequent sight, and it was clear to see how a special bond had developed between the tall dancer and her namesake - not many knew the depth of that connection, but it was clear to see nonetheless.

But those moments seemed long ago and far away as summer faded into autumn, and a slight chill began to make itself felt in the air. Soon the leaves would begin to change, to lead the procession into winter. In those heavy moments, when little ears were not around to hear, Toby felt closer than ever to giving in to final despair. As if his life would be, as the old song said, forever autumn.

As a child, growing up at the Spaceport with precious little to dream about... he had watched the stars. He'd spoken to them back then, promising them that he would one day fly among them. Now, so many years later, he spoke to them again. Asking for some sign, some hope, that he would see her again.

Tabitha St Germain

Date: 2014-09-23 14:30 EST
Meanwhile...

The dream was a lovely one - one with laughter, and smiles, as one does when watching young children play. Maurin led her sisters in a rough and tumble game of tag, until Reinette had enough, and Selene was practically falling over from lack of nap. All too soon, Tabitha bundled them inside, and after settling all three down (though Maurin was simply given a small stack of books to occupy her, as she steadfastly refused to nap like a baby), Mama herself curled up for a well-deserved rest, to dream.. the same dream.

After a while, or however long a while is in a dream, Tabitha noticed that the things around her weren't changing. The Cabin was the same, of course, but the leaves didn't fall, and the snow never came. The same birdsong echoed in the trees, and the same squirrel foraged in the same places. The girls played the same rowdy game of tag, and the nap ritual never varied. While comforting at first, now it seemed odd - and troubling.

Her first instinct was to reach out through the bond she and Toby shared, only to find the way blocked. Not broken, or severed, but like something or someone had felled a large tree across the psychic landscape between her and her husband. Frowning, she tried to reach each of her children in turn, in their birth order - first Maurin, then Reinette, then finally little Selene.

She discovered that while she couldn't reach Selene through conventional means, she could touch her youngest's dreams. The Dreamwalker gift was very strong in Selene, and thus she was able to at least call to her in that dream, enough to let Selene know what was happening. Unfortunately, a two-year-old can only communicate so much to an adult, so much of the message was lost.

Next, she managed to reach her eldest - the most pragmatic and sensible of the St. Germain girls. While able to relay to her Papa that she missed her mother's voice, and that she'd heard it faintly, the meaning of that message was unclear, simply because Maurin, while highly intelligent, simply didn't have the vocabulary to explain any better.

Her contact with Reinette was at least while she was awake, but the middle St. Germain lass was prone to moments of stillness where she listened to things no one else in her family could perceive. So while her stance and behavior set her Papa on alert, the cause was unclear.

It took some effort on her part, because of the loop, but she was at last able to power her way into Toby's dream, winding them down memory lane, through what was - even with a hint of what could be, ending with the whispered plea for help that echoed loudly in the dreamscape. Yet even that proved futile, for Toby was now away, helping his friends in far-off Eldicor, with an uncertain return date.

So Tabitha waited, and while she still enjoyed the dream, she knew it for what it was - she knew it was a loop, one that at first she couldn't understand, but then she knew. The pneumonia that had threatened her was inexplicably healed - and had been almost from the moment she'd been set adrift on the figurative raft on which she now found herself. Spinning and swirling, yet never going anywhere except back to start. The question was, quite simply, how to get off the ride, without hurting herself and/or her family?

Toby

Date: 2014-09-25 22:51 EST
Help me...

Almost on cue, Toby jerked awake, sitting up in bed with his heart racing. A sidelong glance at the chrono on his nightstand... 0530. It was almost like clockwork - just before dawn, there came the dream.

Frantic images, blurry and indistinct, but recognizable to him. Familiar they were, painfully so. Tabitha and the girls, one of those happy and average days that are so easily forgotten in time. Then that feeling of dread that rose overtop, and the whisper ... no more than a little breeze in the air.

He'd been having that dream for months now.

Toby levered himself around to sit up, feet on the floor. There was no point in trying to get back to sleep now, it wouldn't be too much longer before he could hear little feet skittering around downstairs.

The dream was almost torture by now. But what was strange was how blurry and 'wrong' it seemed.. like he was seeing a dream played back to him, rather than 'having it' himself. And always that pleading whisper at the end... sometimes he thought that it was his own guilty conscience tormenting him with Tabitha's own voice. Every night, just the same.

Toby's hand froze in mid-air as he was reaching for his water bottle on the nightstand. The realization hit him all at once, as if he were finally understanding a lesson that a patient teacher had been hammering at him for months.

It wasn't just having the same dream all the time. It was the EXACT same dream. Every detail identical. Every thing he could remember, duplicated each time. And that whisper was always.. exactly... the same.

Like a loop.

It was a good thing that water bottle was plastic. It would have surely shattered, as it fell from suddenly numb fingers.

Tabitha St Germain

Date: 2014-09-27 11:59 EST
Meanwhile...

Tabitha sat in the rocker, as she always did after the girls were settled in for their naps - the same naps they'd been having over and over again. Only this time, Tabitha was able to think of other things, new things - such as how she was no longer on the very brink of death, one breath away from her last.

In the beginning she hadn't considered the subject, simply because she was unaware it needed considering. But now, especially now, it seemed vitally important in understanding what exactly was happening with her, and how exactly she could make it crystal clear that she didn't have the ability to free herself from the looping ride - that she needed help to finally awaken, whole and healthy once more.

Casting out as Toby taught her, she at first perceived nothing except what was always in the loop - her, the girls, the cabin and the lake, the birds and the squirrels, the dogs and the cats in the background. Then, after focusing for a while, breathing slowly, she caught a flash of a spark, the barest hint of.. but then it was gone. Frowning, she tried casting out again, but to no avail - and her eyes were closing for the nap she always had at this point in the ride, and even though she fought the fatigue with every fiber of her being, Tabitha was soon asleep, and the ride was once again returning to start.

Toby

Date: 2014-10-05 19:21 EST
The window lay wide open, despite the sudden blast of early October cold that had arisen over the past few days. Toby welcomed it, because at 3 in the morning, you need every advantage you can get to clear your head for deep thinking.

There was no doubt in his mind anymore. Tabitha was trying to reach out to him. And to the girls as well, if their odd experiences and dreams were any indication. It made sense to him that they would have perceived her first - she was their mother, they'd been born from her. The connection was absolute.

It also made sense that eventually, he would start perceiving the truth behind it. They had their own connection, their own bond, after all. And now that she'd 'found' him... she was desperately trying to tell him something.

But what?

If Toby had smoked, he'd have probably had an entire pack of crushed butts around him now. Instead, he sat near the open window while the cold breeze worked its chill magic on his sleep-deprived thoughts.

So the dream is always the same. It didn't seem to hold any revelations for him, it was a comfortable sort of dream - a day in the life of a mother and children. But then, why was there something sinister about it? Of all the things in the world, nothing was purer than home and family.

The more he mulled over it, the more that absolute repetition niggled at him. But, he thought, you would think that a repetitive dream wouldn't be a bad thing, if it were such a happy and comforting dream.

Comforting.

He went very still again.


"And until we figure out how to make you better.. you have all the time in the world. Sleep and dream of me... of them... and I promise I'll come for you when I can."

The words jumped back at him across the sea of memory. His own words, spoken to her not a heartbeat after he'd acted in utter and final desperation to hold her an inch from death. Suspended in her last moments.

Toby remembered the thought that had raced across his mind, even as he did it. How horrible would it be, to be stuck in the last dying moments of your life.

And so the inspiration had struck him. He had given her the only comfort that he could find, offering her one beautiful, perfect day with her children to remember and relive. To stay safe and happy within that day.

But somehow she was aware of it now. She was aware of herself within that frozen moment of time, which was impossible. Impossible, he corrected himself, except for the fact that Tabitha was doing it. But how?

Toby

Date: 2014-10-05 19:32 EST
Unbidden, his thoughts - ever in motion - flicked back to the one who had first 'heard' Tabitha. Little Selene. The dreamer.

In all his life, Toby had never had any indications that he possessed any gifts pertaining to dreams. He'd never done what his youngest child had done, disappearing into dreams and appearing somewhere else. He'd assumed up until now that it was possibly just a latent gift of his, unlocked but passed down to Selene.

His lips thinned as he shook his head, marveling at his own arrogance and lack of foresight. Maybe it hadn't shown him before now.. because it didn't COME from him at all. Oh sure, it was a latent gift... but it was Tabitha's.

So that's how she was reaching out to them. What had Selene O'Malley said to them once, when they'd discussed the little one's gift? "Dreams exist outside of time, you can live an entire lifetime in the span of one night's dream."

If that was true.. then Tabitha's dream was the open window through which she was calling out. And it would explain why they'd had the dreams at various times over the summer - time meant nothing to her in her endless dream.

But one question remained unanswered in his mind. She was calling out to be set free - but what if he freed her, only for the illness to claim her a heartbeat later?

How could he release her from her prison, when the alternative could be her own death?

Toby

Date: 2014-10-12 21:45 EST
The dream was on once more. It was even more chilling now, for its predictable, absolute familiarity. He watched it unfold, every step the same as ever. Every word, every caress of a child's hair, every motion exactly the same.

It was a few moments before he realized there was something new. It was faint, oh so very faint - enough that Toby almost didn't feel it at all. At the most distant edge of his perception.. he could hear music.

( https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s-bgC1Yip6c
"I Know You're Out There Somewhere", by the Moody Blues
Lyrics by Justin Hayward, (c) 1988)


I know you're out there somewhere..
Somewhere, somewhere..
I know I'll find you somehow,
Somehow, somehow..
And somehow I'll return again to you..

The mist is lifting slowly
I can see the way ahead
And I've left behind the empty streets
That once inspired my life
And the strength of the emotion
Is like thunder in the air
'Cos the promise that we made each other
Haunts me to the end

I know you're out there somewhere,
Somewhere, somewhere..
I know you're out there somewhere,
Somewhere you can hear my voice..
I know I'll find you somehow,
Somehow, somehow..
I know I'll find you somehow,
And somehow I'll return again to you..

The secret of your beauty
And the mystery of your soul
I've been searching for in everyone I meet
And the times I've been mistaken
It's impossible to say
And the grass is growing
Underneath our feet

I know you're out there somewhere,
Somewhere, somewhere..
I know you're out there somewhere,
Somewhere you can hear my voice..
I know I'll find you somehow,
Somehow, somehow..
I know I'll find you somehow,
And somehow I'll return again to you..


You see I know you're out there somewhere
O yes I know you're out there somewhere
You see I know I'll find you somehow
O yes I know I'll find you somehow

the words that I remember
From my childhood still are true
That there's none so blind
As those who will not see
And to those who lack the courage
And say it's dangerous to try
Well they just don't know
That love eternal will not be denied

I know you're out there somewhere,
Somewhere, somewhere..
I know you're out there somewhere,
Somewhere you can hear my voice..
I know I'll find you somehow,
Somehow, somehow..
I know I'll find you somehow,
And somehow I'll return again to you..

Yes I know it's going to happen...
I can feel you getting near..
And soon we'll be returning,
To the fountain of our youth..
And if you wake up wondering,
In the darkness I'll be there..
My arms will close around you and protect you with the truth..

I know you're out there somewhere,
Somewhere, somewhere..
I know you're out there somewhere,
Somewhere you can hear my voice..
I know I'll find you somehow,
Somehow, somehow..
I know I'll find you somehow,
And somehow I'll return again to you..

~~

As the song ended, Toby sat up slowly in bed - the dream was already fading away. But it didn't matter, he'd heard the message she had sent him. And he understood.

Yes I know it's going to happen...
I can feel you getting near.

Toby

Date: 2014-10-13 20:33 EST
"But why do we have to go with Aunt Selene tonight, Daddy?"

The question was plaintive, stubborn. Maurin was very much like her father, it was hard to talk her into many things, and even harder to talk her *out* of others. Her sisters stood on either side of her, looking up with agreeing nods. Maurin was almost always the ringleader, the one who came up with the ideas of what to do (and sometimes the trouble to get into). It was usually a given that her sisters would be in agreement with her.

"Since when do you complain about it? You love visiting Aunt Selene and Uncle Todd." Toby eyed his daughters with just the slightest frown. "Half the time when they're in town, you pitch a fit until you get to see them."

Maurin didn't seem to have an answer for that, but Toby could practically hear the wheels turning in her head. It was true, the girls loved visiting Selene and Todd; Selene loved to take the girls out when she went clothes shopping (and inevitably each child came home with an eagerly clutched bag), and Todd was still very much a big kid himself.

But Reinette spoke up then, her brilliant blue eyes and delicate voice laden with gravitas beyond her four years. "You're going to try and make Mama come back. I know it." Next to her, Maurin folded her arms and silently dared her father to deny it. And little Selene just gazed up at him with those big eyes.

If he had been thinking clearer, Toby might've tried to bluff his way out of that one. Difficult as it was to deceive little Reinette, who saw so clearly, Toby was one of the few who could manage it. But tonight, he was so preoccupied with his preparations that he answered instead, "What makes you say that, Rennie?"

"'Cause it's true, Daddy." The reply came with utter conviction. "An' we want to be here, when you wake Mama up."

Maurin, not to be outdone or outspoken by her little sister, spoke up next. "We want to help, Daddy."

And Selene only gazed with those eyes, and mumbled, "Pease?"

Toby sighed inwardly. He'd feared exactly this, that they would want to be there, to help, to see their mother wake up. The problem was, as he'd been told a million times over, telepathy was borne up by a foundation of two great pillars; willpower and concentration.

He knew he had the will. And Toby was sure he had the power - hadn't he been the one who had done this to begin with? Hadn't he found his moment of utter clarity, of one-ness, in Eldicor?

But concentration.. of all the things in this world that could break his concentration, it was the three little sprites who stood before him, at once pleading and stubborn.

The inward sigh was reflected by an outward one. All three little girls smiled at the same time, when they heard it. They knew their father well, knew that sound. Roughly translated, it meant "Fine, fine."

Their little faces immediately went solemn at his ensuing expression, however. And moreso when he spoke. "Then you listen to me. All of you." He cocked his head and gave them the Eyes.

Mama had The Look, the one all kids know and tremble from. But Daddy had the Eyes - when he was dead serious, and would have no argument over what he was about to say, he used the Eyes. And the Voice.

"I want you on the couch. I am going to need to keep all my attention on your Mama, and if you are making noise or running around... it will not work. So on the couch you stay. DO you understand me?"

A siblant chorus of of "Yes, Daddy.." met his ears, and he gave them a rueful look.

"All right, then. Off with you, and keep the dogs occupied." He glanced over his shoulder at the still form in the room beyond. "Daddy has work to do."

Toby

Date: 2014-10-13 22:29 EST
The sounds of whispering could be heard in the living room still.

"Shhhh. Daddy said be quiet, Rennie."

"You're making noise too!"

"Am not!"

"Are too!"

The corner of Toby's mouth twitched, and he gently closed the door behind him, turning his gaze on Tabitha at last. She looked exactly like she had, every moment of every day since that night last fall - was it coming up on a year now, since he'd reacted in desperation? She looked so peaceful, like she was sleeping.

Word choice, he thought, and quickly moved past that particular imagery.

For the first time, the thought really struck Toby hard. How the hell was he going to DO this? There was no primer, no guide for what he had done, what he was seeking to do... or in this case, undo.

Then, he decided, he'd begin with what he'd already done. Toby closed his eyes, casting his thoughts back to that moment almost a year ago. He sought the memory of that panicked realization, of the sounds of his wife taking her last few labored breaths, of the singular moment when he'd decided she would never reach that last one.

Was it that easy? Just to decide how you want it to be.. and it is?

All right, then. I want her back.

Toby bent all his thought upon that single desire, that one wish, and opened his eyes.

And his heart sank.

Toby

Date: 2014-10-13 23:10 EST
It didn't work?

Why didn't it work?

Again and again, Toby concentrated his thought on Tabitha. He could feel her still, hazy and far away, insulated from him by the frozen bubble of time in which she lay dreaming. But she WAS there, she wasn't lost to him.

Each time he gathered his will and reached for her, though, everything grew thick and unwilling, as if he was being fought. In truth, maybe he was. He'd twisted time around in a knot, and it did not want to come undone again.

I did this. So why can't I UNdo it?

Anger welled up, frustration and rage mixing with the determination, and he hammered on the barrier separating them. But it did not yield, it did not even waver.

Toby paused, finding that he was gasping for breath. He shuddered and closed his eyes, seeking calm once again. Now he let his mind travel back a little more recently, to the Dark Forest of Eldicor, and the battle. He could still remember that moment of utter clarity, when it had felt like he could see everything. That clarity had faded with the end of the battle, but the memory was still bright.

Maybe that's the answer. Once I found that moment.. the battle was already over. I just had to let it happen.

But that utter clarity eluded him now. Again he felt his heart beginning to hammer, the flutterings of panic rising. It had to work. It had to!

Once more he sought to immerse himself in the world around him... but no matter what Toby did, Tabitha was unreachable in her single moment in time. With a flash of red, he threw his mind violently against it... only to sit up a few moments later on the floor, dimly realizing he'd passed out from the unsuccessful effort, his eyes still pressed shut.

And still she lay there, just one moment, one second, beyond his reach.

Toby

Date: 2014-10-13 23:16 EST
"Of all the powers in creation, there exists nothing so strong as the belief of a child." - Unknown.


(For maximum effect, the soundtrack for the next three posts, is here:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MjmGZfHHC80 )



Opening his eyes took the greatest effort of will Toby had ever known. Not from weariness or pain, but from the fear of seeing his failure driven home. The sight of her, still motionless, still trapped in a moment of time. Tabitha lay right before them, but she might as well be a universe away.

He stood up, and in a plaintive gesture, reached out as if maybe.. just maybe... she might reach back to him.

The worst part was, it had been so easy the first time. The decision made, he had reached out with his will... and frozen her in time, an instant from death. There hadn't even been any effort to it. But something had changed now, something fundamental. Toby groped futilely to find that same sublime moment of grace, that state of decision, and found he simply could not. It had come so easily that first time... and so easily again in Eldicor in the last moments of the battle with the spiders. Perfect clarity... now denied to him.

Was it because she wasn't about to die? Was it only that absolute finality that had given him the ability to do this the first time? And if so.. how the hell could he undo it?

All of these thoughts took place in the space of a heartbeat, not even long enough to lower his hand again. Muscles relaxed in Toby's arm, and it began to fall.

And then that falling hand was stopped by a single touch. Then a second one. And a third.

Toby

Date: 2014-10-13 23:22 EST
Toby blinked, an action that he'd started what seemed like ages ago. To his right, Maurin lay her hand upon her father's; to his left, Reinette's even more delicate touch mirrored her sister's. There were no words spoken, just two pairs of pleading eyes. And below, little Selene clung sobbing to her father's leg, looking up to him as well.

Toby stared back at his daughters. And maybe for the first time, Toby was truly *aware* of them, of their true natures.

There was Maurin's unbreakable dark stubbornness, so like his own. Adamant, she could no sooner give up than she could make herself stop breathing.

There was little Selene's primal need for her "Mama"; a need no less great than her sisters, but all the more pure and potent for her age. She understood only what her heart cried out for.

And there was Reinette, awash with golden light, her perception so much more than her age would allow you to believe. An old soul in a child's form.

In that moment, Toby could feel the thoughts of his daughters more keenly than ever, and then...

Something more.

Toby

Date: 2014-10-13 23:25 EST
It does not take a telepath to understand the love and the need that a child has for her mother. It isn't necessary to be 'gifted' to understand the pain of loss, when a child loses a parent, or believes they are about to. These truths have existed since the first mother, the first child. As a father, Toby understood them in his own way.

But now, the love and need and grief and the cries of three little girls flowed through him, becoming something new. All of it ... their determination, their love, their fears. Borne through the conduit of Reinette's golden light, it was beyond anything he had ever imagined.

Of all the powers in creation, there exists nothing so strong as the belief of a child. The sure and certain belief that their parents can make anything right. The certainty that Mama or Daddy can make it all better. As a child, Toby had never known that feeling himself; but he felt it now, and it staggered him. For that one moment, he was filled with the absolute TRUTH of their belief.

Daddy will make it all better.


Against that shining truth made reality, mere 'Time' never stood a chance.

Tabitha St Germain

Date: 2014-10-16 04:23 EST
Meanwhile...

The dream started as it always had - a romping game of tag in the crispness that only comes with the early fall, the time of apples, the time of harvest and richness that Tabitha loved for as long as she could remember. But this time, as Maurin made the diving leap that Reinette always dodged with a sassy face and a squealing laugh, Tabitha heard a faint stir - an echo of footsteps in the leaves, a hint of a voice calling, singing notes just on the edge of hearing. And for the first time, the dream changed.

Slowly, Tabitha stood up from the swing where she watched the girls in their game, walking as if in a daze towards the lake - the lake that started it all, so to speak. Once she was on the shore, she gazed out along the water, her mind drifting back to the day so long ago when she literally fell back into Toby's life, winding through all the memories afterwards - the way he tended her injured knee, the way he looked at her when he thought she wasn't looking, the night that still made her cheeks rosy...

The voice was stronger here, with a resonance Tabitha recognized at once - a voice she'd heard whispered against her hair, soothing her every fear, ever comforting, ever supportive.. a voice she'd missed more keenly than she realized until that moment in time - and she reached out her hand as if to touch the source, but her fingers touched only the fall air.

With a cry of frustration, she again pushed out with her hand, but again it was like he was just out of reach, just outside of time. As tears traced down her cheeks as she sank to her knees on the shore, a sudden warmth engulfed her, as if she'd walked into a sunbeam. And in that warmth, she knew at once what it was - no... WHO they were, for every mother everywhere knows her children, no matter the space and time between them. Her lips moved, answering the song still wrapping around her..

And to those who lack the courage
And say it's dangerous to try
Well they just don't know
That love eternal will not be denied

And the moment the last note wavered in the dream, it shattered in a burst of golden light, streaked with crimson determination and indigo innocence, suffused with blinding blue-white, and Tabitha felt the weight of her bed under her, the brush of the wind through her hair, and as her eyes opened, her dark eyes glimmered with health, joy and unshed tears, the smile that was Toby's alone on her lips as she held out her hand for him, and reached an arm for her darling girls.

Toby

Date: 2014-10-16 16:42 EST
Time is such a funny thing. It can pass by in an instant or stretch into eternity, depending on your perception.

As Tabitha's eyes opened...really, truly opened... time seemed to freeze solid. Toby felt like he might drown in every detail of her face; her lips, barely parted with a new drawn breath.. her eyes, dark as midnight and just starting to widen with realization.. the way her hair fell around her like an ebon cloud. He could almost see Tabitha's eyelashes moving infinitely slow, as she blinked for the first time in almost a year.

Her eyes closed. Her eyes opened.

And in the most agreeably symmetric way possible, for the second time in a heartbeat's span, time snapped back into motion again. And all the room was filled with the cacaphony of children screaming with joy as they clambered up onto the bed, falling against their Mama, sobbing and laughing and talking all at once. As if that wasn't enough, the sound roused the dogs, who came running in (Duchess, rather slower as she was still waiting to become a mama herself) to see what was going on.

Toby watched from the doorway, just leaning on it with a quiet, contented little smile on his face. He felt almost like he was watching a scene from another lifetime, the joy of it seemed to belong to someone else. He was happy.. but it seemed to be more of a satisfied contentment now.

Then she met his eyes, held out her hand... and the smile that suffused Tabitha's face was for him, and him alone. And that's when it truly became real.

Tabitha St Germain

Date: 2014-10-16 16:51 EST
Fall continued to roll in, in the northern forest. Leaves began to turn color and fall, a little chill began to find its way into the air, and the nights began to creep up a little sooner. But in that little cabin in its clearing, life had returned in many ways.

Despite her insistence that she was completely healed and fully healthy, Tabitha was dragged to their family doctor at the 'port, and given a truly extensive examination - one that went even beyond the most invasive tests given to expectant mothers. And with no little amazement, Dr. T found no trace of the infection or hint of the mysterious illness that had nearly killed her, despite the best and most cutting-edge tests the doctor could order. Tabitha, true to form, took this with her typical good grace and patience.

After that, it was a question of picking up the threads of an old life, as the saying went. Tabitha quit her job at the bookstore, but not out of any dissatisfaction. Instead, she chose to indulge an old dream and an old love, taking a position as an assistant instructor at a small local dance studio outside the City. That is, when Toby and the girls would let her out of their sight.

At night, she walked past each door of the cabin, looking in and smiling at her three little angels as they went to sleep. As she watched little Selene curl her arms around her little stuffed wolf, the thought came to her once more: whatever else the future was going to hold, they had all learned one unforgettable lesson from this.

Cherish life - cherish every moment of it, don't waste a second. And if you should be so fortunate as to gain a second chance? Make the most of it.

Tabitha smiled to herself, and quietly closed the door.

Toby

Date: 2014-10-16 16:55 EST
So ends Act VII - a mother returned to her children, a beloved wife restored to her husband. A family reunited at last.

And once again, life goes on.. returned to normal.

For now. After all, this IS Rhydin!



Now at last I hold you,
Now all is said and done..
The search has come full circle,
Our destinies are one...

- Survivor, "The Search Is Over"