The Quiet Riot (1998 Dansantes)


Oh, the goblins were in a tizzy. Dunn had placed the final straw on the poor camel?s back and it broke, along with a lot of china and crockery. The kitchen was in a shambles. One little green goblin stared lusterless at the mess, clutching what might have been a soup tureen at one time in his little fingers.

The others scurried about with brooms and dustpans, soap and rags, trying to get the room in order before the Archmage Tournament the following week. A larger goblin staggered through the mess, clutching a piece of paper in his hand.

?Brothers and sisters,? he cried. ?The time has come to unite!? He waved what he later explained was a petition in their faces. ?It is time we went on strike! A strike against Dunn!?

The cheering was deafening.

Taking an alternate approach, Morg boomed from the podium certain expletives that had most of the goblins scratching their heads as to the meaning. With the noise abated, Morg tapped again with the gavel, and called the meeting to order. ?We are gathered here today to cast ballot as to if we should unionize against the ~tyranny~ that has befallen us. To begin, we must needs call role to insure those present are eligible to vote.?

And the role call began.

Morg, ?Zerm!? Zerm snorted present.

?Brak!? A growl.

?Prak!? A snort.

?Qurt!? A growl.

?Snarg!? A burp.

?Togda!? A snort.

?Fnaught!? A crash as the startled Fnaught woke and fell from the bleachers.

The roll call continued.

?Derge!? A grunt.

?Kaught!? A growl.

?Aulywsheius!? The response was a burp that neigh peeled the tarps from the floors of all the rings, and which caused everyone and everything present to duck and cover.

As all peeked from their hiding places, and slowly returned to their seats, Fortune turned a questioning look to the Rhydin official. The official responded, ?Aulywsheius, another human naming.? The answer was left at that.

All this while, Karg had continued his eloquence leaving Morg tapping his fingers against the podium?s surface. When Karg finally finished, Morg muttered something about a little knowledge being a dangerous thing. Hammering away at the podium again, in hope of waking all the goblins that had fallen asleep during Karg?s oration, Morg moved to finish the roll call.

And the meeting continued.

Morg ushered the meeting quickly through the more mind-numbing details of the by-laws and constitution under which GARBAGE operated. Some questions arose as to the name of the union. Certain goblins prone to more egalitarian thought raised issue with the seemingly sexist nature of GARBAGE.

Lomzurg put it most simply. ?-Brotherhood- Against Goblin Exploitation don?t let das girl goblins join us. And wes needs them, yep, really.?

Karg added his copious agreement. ?Aye, brother Lomzurg puts the matter quite eloquently. If we are to ascend to the very summit of freedom from oppression, it cannot be on the backs of our sistren who must equally share in the glorious vision that comes at such glorious heights! We must raise all those who have oppression. ~Dunn~ to them.
We must be champions?.?

And for about twenty minutes Karg continued in this line of exhorting.

Morg would have interupted sooner, except he himself had fallen asleep in the first minute. Had it not been for a very mild burp from Aulywysheius (a mere 1.6 on the Aulywysheius scale) Morg and most of the other goblins may well have continued sleeping. As it was, the burp stirred them (along with several of the branches on near by trees) to action.

Morg gaveled twice. Karg paused mid expounding, and looked at the podium. Morg was quick to take advantage of the pause. ?Karg, tell me something. What is the first half of this union?s name??

A hesitant Karg replied,? Greater Army of Rhydin??

?Very good.? Answered a yawning Morg. ?Now,? he continued,? who controls the Greater Army of Rhydin??

Karg was about to answer, but the front section of the goblins could be heard thinking aloud with the always impressive ?Duuuuhhhhhh?? Morg answered them with a simple motion to the very last section of the bleachers in which were sitting some very buff looking female goblins.

While the rest of the goblins proceeded to drool over the sight, Karg grinned to Morg, and retook his seat with an embarrassed, ?Nevermind.?
Morg sighed, gaveled the attention back to the podium, and shifted his notes.

And the meeting continued.

Not able to hear for the following five minutes, Morg decided it was a good time to gavel the meeting adjourned, trusting the loyal members of GARBAGE to implement the suggestions. Not hearing the banging, but feeling the vibrations of the hammering, the goblinhood, piled atop itself as a result of Aulywysheiususm, adjourned.

And the meeting would continue.