Ladies and gentlemen, my name is G'nort Dragoon-Talanador. And I am the one behind the one, behind None of the Above. You see, we are going to have an election shortly, and there are several candidates who are ready and willing to step up and say they will be your governor. They're all fine people, no doubt. But let's think about this realistically.
The candidates will all say they will do something good for the city. They'll bring peace or order or stop attacks on the undead or children. They'll figure out how to stop the slave trade and bombings in the Marketplace. They'll clean up the city and be a good representative of the people, for the people. They may even believe they will do these things, or that they Can do these things.
But can they"
I think not.
You see, we've had several Governors in the past and each one of them have had noble intentions from the start. Promises made, babies kissed, hands shaken, deals made. You know the deal. An aside from a few parties, has anything ever changed" Have the streets been made any cleaner" Has the slave trade been abolished" Has the Marketplace stopped being blown up"
Oh, sure. We have a global air force or space force or whatever it is that the R.A.S.G. does. Which it still does without the position of Governor being involved. Sure, we have parties and special occasions. Which we still do without the position of Governor being involved. We still have the slave trade and explosions in the Marketplace. Without the position of Governor being involved. Heck, the only thing that has been done is the streets being made cleaner, which *I* have done with my garbage cleanup service, TrashMasters. Done, I might say, without the position of Governor being involved. Of course, I am in that for the money. You'd be surprised at how profitable trash collection is.
Ladies and gentlemen, what I am saying is this. We have had Governors in the past and nothing changed. If we have Governors in the future, nothing will change. A Governor in the present means nothing will change. All it is is an election for the benefit of the ones running. Do we really feel a need to cater to these individuals, of which I, admittedly, am one of?
I think not.
That is why I want you to vote for me. Not because I'd be a good Governor. I wouldn't. I'd be selfish and serve my own purposes. I'd cheat and steal and do what I could to make a profit for myself. No, I want you to vote for me because there is an option that is going to be severely lacking on these ballots and what that option is, is the one I am running my flag under. It is the option that gives the right to the people to stand up and say "Do you know what? I don't need to be Governed. We survived a long time without a Governor, and we don't need one now!"
That option I am running for is simple. It's right. And it's what everyone should stand up and go for.
That option is "None of the Above."
You see, if I win the title of Governor, I'm not going to do anything to rule over anybody. I'm not going to dictate what can and can't be done. I'm not going to listen to complaints from people who are mad that their neighbor has their music up too loudly at four in the morning. You, as a person, can deal with that yourself. As you used to. As you should. As a Free Rhydin Citizen.
The only thing I may do is see how nice the Governors mansion is and let my girlfriend host a Governors Ball because she really wants to and I would do anything for her. If you've seen her, you would too.
So I ask you, do you really want to have a government official who is impotent and not going to make any changes" Or would you rather live in a free Rhydin, free to do what you want, when you want"
Vote for None of the above. Vote for G.
Ladies and Gentlemen, my name is G'nort Dragoon-Talanador, and I am the One behind the One, behind None of the Above.
Thank you.
The candidates will all say they will do something good for the city. They'll bring peace or order or stop attacks on the undead or children. They'll figure out how to stop the slave trade and bombings in the Marketplace. They'll clean up the city and be a good representative of the people, for the people. They may even believe they will do these things, or that they Can do these things.
But can they"
I think not.
You see, we've had several Governors in the past and each one of them have had noble intentions from the start. Promises made, babies kissed, hands shaken, deals made. You know the deal. An aside from a few parties, has anything ever changed" Have the streets been made any cleaner" Has the slave trade been abolished" Has the Marketplace stopped being blown up"
Oh, sure. We have a global air force or space force or whatever it is that the R.A.S.G. does. Which it still does without the position of Governor being involved. Sure, we have parties and special occasions. Which we still do without the position of Governor being involved. We still have the slave trade and explosions in the Marketplace. Without the position of Governor being involved. Heck, the only thing that has been done is the streets being made cleaner, which *I* have done with my garbage cleanup service, TrashMasters. Done, I might say, without the position of Governor being involved. Of course, I am in that for the money. You'd be surprised at how profitable trash collection is.
Ladies and gentlemen, what I am saying is this. We have had Governors in the past and nothing changed. If we have Governors in the future, nothing will change. A Governor in the present means nothing will change. All it is is an election for the benefit of the ones running. Do we really feel a need to cater to these individuals, of which I, admittedly, am one of?
I think not.
That is why I want you to vote for me. Not because I'd be a good Governor. I wouldn't. I'd be selfish and serve my own purposes. I'd cheat and steal and do what I could to make a profit for myself. No, I want you to vote for me because there is an option that is going to be severely lacking on these ballots and what that option is, is the one I am running my flag under. It is the option that gives the right to the people to stand up and say "Do you know what? I don't need to be Governed. We survived a long time without a Governor, and we don't need one now!"
That option I am running for is simple. It's right. And it's what everyone should stand up and go for.
That option is "None of the Above."
You see, if I win the title of Governor, I'm not going to do anything to rule over anybody. I'm not going to dictate what can and can't be done. I'm not going to listen to complaints from people who are mad that their neighbor has their music up too loudly at four in the morning. You, as a person, can deal with that yourself. As you used to. As you should. As a Free Rhydin Citizen.
The only thing I may do is see how nice the Governors mansion is and let my girlfriend host a Governors Ball because she really wants to and I would do anything for her. If you've seen her, you would too.
So I ask you, do you really want to have a government official who is impotent and not going to make any changes" Or would you rather live in a free Rhydin, free to do what you want, when you want"
Vote for None of the above. Vote for G.
Ladies and Gentlemen, my name is G'nort Dragoon-Talanador, and I am the One behind the One, behind None of the Above.
Thank you.