Nodding to her, he pressed the button, so that the elevator would do as she asked. He didn?t push the issue with her sickness, as he could understand that psychics sometimes had problems with emotional trauma. He?d dealt with telepaths, empaths and psychics many times before, so to him her? ?sickness? was a natural occurrence.
?That uniform? helped me.? He started speaking again, trying to conceal his thoughts and talk to her normally. This was quite important to him, and she had told him that she wanted to know, so he did his best to continue on carefully.
?It hid me from those that wanted to hurt me, for a long? long time. I could go out, in uniform, and take care of any criminal element without having to worry that the criminals were going to come back and hurt me, or my family.?
?After a time, I was forced into a situation where I returned to S.E.F.F., then afterwards took an assignment on a Starship serving for a year or two. but somehow I would always return to that uniform, to that institute? to the X-Men. I learned a lot there, I learned how to help others that couldn?t help themselves. I defended peoples civil rights, and fought for equality. But behind that mask? I didn?t have anything to worry about, the mask served as a barrier, and as a symbol of hope to the hopeless and a symbol of fear to the feared.?
"Maybe that's where you need to be then. Maybe the guard isn?t right. I?ll understand if you need to go back to Xavier."
She took off running as soon as the doors opened and ran for the bathroom, of course there were several, but she ran for the one upstairs and slammed the door shut as she sat down on the floor, breaking out in a cold sweat as she rocked back and forth. She was paler than normal, her face white a sheet, and her body was shaking. Wrapping her arms around her knees, she closed her eyes, trying to get him out of her head.
?I?m sorry!? He yelled from the staircase as he ascended it, sighing and shaking his head. This little revelation session was not going as planned at all. His own emotional bearings had thrown hers all out of wack, and that was making him feel horrible, or at least so he thought.
?Let me just shut the fuck up, here I am airing my problems out, and I?m gettin ya sick.?
"No, no. I'm okay. I'll be okay." She stood up quickly and moved to the sink, splashing water on her face.
"It was just unexpected. Give me a few moments to gather myself and strengthen some barriers and you can continue." Said as she walked out, patting her face dry. " I want to know. I need to know. This is important to you. "
?I just don?t wanna stress ya out.? He said, walking down the hallway and towards her slowly.
?I know this stuff can be rough, and that?s why? I didn?t wanna bring ya down there for a while. It can be a lot to handle.?
" It's just, like I said, the feelings I get from you. I don't like them. What... what happened back there. I mean.. back then?" She blinked rapidly as she continued to wipe at her face.
" There are missing pieces, so much I don't know. Are you going to tell me or do you just want to go to bed?" She raised her eyebrows to him, almost looking hopeful.
His response came almost too-quickly.
?I don?t want to go to bed.? He paused for a moment before continuing. ?At least, not yet.?
Holding out his hand for her, he started to lead her to the bedroom, perhaps a more familiar atmosphere would help the mood.
?Like I was sayin?, Professor X helped me understand my mutant powers, and he helped me deal with the trauma I went through. After a while, I went back, and I?d serve tours of duty on Starships, and I gotta admit I was in the right place at the right time more then once. I?m probably the only Starfleet Admiral that didn?t have a hefty full-time career till I was a captain.?
Smirking and chuckling, he led her over to the bed and guided her to sit. He didn?t bother to sit himself as he wanted to remain focused and finished talking about the thoughts that were playing through his head.
?But that uniform protected me, protected who I was. Sorta like how? Wolvinator, the name, has protected me for so long. I was thinkin? about? goin? back to that uniform. Maybe I could make a difference here and protect my identity at the same time, so I wouldn?t have to worry about ya or any of these maniacs tryin? to attack the estate.?
"You mean like that guy on picture box? Clark Kent? You wanna be like him?"
She tilted her head to the side as she sat down and curled into the bed, trying to block out some of his thoughts.
?Yeah, like Clark Kent. A? Secret Identity. That?s all Wolvinator has ever been, that?s what that other uniform represents, hey? every superhero?s gotta have one right? I guess wearin? that big old robe doesn?t really fulfill that lil paranoia I?ve got. Just, all that mess that we went through during the election, I?m sketchy about bein? put in a situation where you or anyone else could get hurt.?
?The idea dawned on me a little while back.? He explained. ?I've heard about a masked character runnin' around, durin' the Zombie invasion, the Marketplace bombings, and a few other things. People were callin' 'em the Crimson Flash. It gave me memories of the things I used to do, and how... excitin' it was. Well, not too long ago I was readin' through the local prints and I found out that he was unmasked in the Red Dragon Inn, and it turned out to be Grem McTirin, one of the locals I've bumped into a few times. So, in a roundabout way, I know what the guys goin' through now, and I sorta wanna go back to those days. A time when I still wore a mask.?
Slowly pacing about the room as he talked to her, she just listened, and he continued on for a moment.
?It was different when I first came here, I didn?t have anyone else to worry about ?cept fer myself. But now that I?ve got you around, and some of the people that frequent the estate, I don?t wanna risk anyone else?s neck but my own.?
"Well, baby, if it's what you've got to do, I'll support you.? Aly responded. ?Whatever you want. Whatever makes you happy, I'll stand by you. I promise. " She patted the bed for him to join her.
"Professor X must have been an amazing man."
Nodding, he moved to sit down next to her. Adjusting himself he leaned back into the bed further and laid down on his back staring at the ceiling for a moment, deep in thought with what he just told her.
?Chuck is an amazin? man, even though I had a father growing up, and still have one, he was definitely a secondary father figure to me. I could? sure use some of his guidance now.?
"Well, as long as you're careful and safe. Although, people might laugh if you wear tights. So make sure you stick with the sexy suit in the sub level. Okay?" She smiled and curled up to him. "Who is Chuck? Is that Xavier? Tell me about him."
Laughing at that he wrapped her arms around her and held her close to him.
?Yeah Chuck, Charlie, Charles. He?s a mutant, a psychic actually, one of the most powerful psychics on Earth. He created the X-Men as a group of individuals, with abilities, to help fight for Mutant rights. His ideals were peaceful, caring, and he wanted all of humanity to be united in harmony, not to mention? extra-terrestrials. He gave us all hope, all of us that were different. The X-Men was a chance for us to use our abilities for good, to help all of humanity, and to have a place for us mutants to fit it. It was those moments in my life that made me who I am, gave me direction, it?s what I believe in and what I fight for.?
?He?s someone I truly need to thank for setting my course, and helping me do something that I truly love doing. Helping other people.?
Her bottom lips trembled again and she nodded, curling against him and hiding her face against his chest.
"He sounds like an amazing man. I'm glad you had the opportunity to meet him and study under him. Just think, if things had gone differently, you may never have met him. So, I guess, some of the bad stuff was worth it then. Right?" She peeked up at him briefly.
?The bad things that happen make us who we are. It was a horrible experience, but I wouldn?t be who I am without it happening. It?s definitely saved my life more then once, but? I?ll??
He stopped, doing his best to wipe the thoughts from his mind.
?I?ll spare ya the trauma and just not think about it. There?s so much other? nicer stuff we can talk about. Bein? in three organizations, and havin? a family, my life hasn?t ever really seen a dull moment, so we could always talk about the??
Another pause, but this time? it was a yawn, a nice long and large yawn. He was growing tired, more so now since he was becoming comfortable on the bed, next to his fianc?e.
?More interesting stuff.?
"I agree, the bad stuff makes us who we are, but no need to focus on that. I don't like it when you're upset, it makes me feel yucky." She pulled the blankets up over them and laid her head on his chest. " You're sleepy. Maybe you should go to sleep and we can talk about the interesting stuff tomorrow. Hmm? What do you say?"
His eyes started to close a bit as he nodded into her, nuzzling his face into her neck as he tried to get more comfortable.
?It?s been a long day Aly, how about I take off tomorrow and we just spend the day together, alright??
"Sounds perfect." She closed her eyes, sighing softly, glad that he was going to sleep. As he relaxed his thoughts faded and her mind was more at ease. Her fingers lightly trailed up and down his chest as she listened to his heart, the sound calming her as she drifted off.
A single whisper came from him, one of sincerity and of passion.
?Always remember, no matter what happens, I love you Alystrianna.? It was his final words, before drifting off to sleep himself.
The tears slid silently down her cheeks as she heard him, but she said nothing, hoping he believed her asleep and wouldn't feel the wetness of her tears. She mouthed the words back and thought them long and hard, hoping he'd hear her mind speaking them. He had to believe them.
