Dear Audrey,

I've come back to Rhydin. Miles seems to have disappeared and I've been terribly lonely with out him. So, I set off in search of my old home. It's been rather receptive, and I've made friends quickly. The inn is nothing like you'd remember it..though you were only about seven last time you were here. None of my friends remain, and I'm happy with that. I'd like this new start to stick. No more of the old life, slaving and lying and cheating, late nights galavanting. I'm going to make good on my life.

I've met someone. I think it will become something... His name is Chuckie and he's everything Miles was not. He is loud and funny.. crass, even. He likes me, I can tell, though it's a little off putting as I haven't had attentions made to me since.. well, it's been a long time. He's smooth, and it's clear he's well practiced. I'm almost certain that I'm not a passing phase, but I'm cautious about it none the less. It's so scary to have my heart out there, Audrey.

To know that someone can capture it and hurt me again if he wants. Part of me wants to turn off and run as far as I can, but most of me knows that is a terrible idea. That here, in his tall Irish man, is a promise of happiness and an end to the black hole that has been my heart. I've been laughing, and smiling, and... god, I've missed that. I haven't had it since we were all here.. when I was pregnant with your sister. God rest her soul. It makes me want babies and a house, and to be able to have you with me again. I can't get the picture of a family out of my head. Though, I guess I'm too old for that now.

I've met some other people.. they've been fun and don't mind my sense of humor. Lydia is a riot. You'd love her. She gets in binds that are cute and fun, and doesn't mind a little humor. We actually had a water fight of sorts. I haven't done that since grade school! Charna, Chuckie's brother's girl(keep up there?) is also wonderful. We're thinking about talking the boys into taking us on a trip. I could use the distraction from myself. And there's a girl Issy.. no words for her. Just spunky and quick on her feet and her mind. I really have taken a liking to what seems like daily visits. Grem, a rather quiet young man, is also there when she comes in and they have a wonderful banter that is a joy to watch and more to participate in. There's also Xaevier.. a fun lad, new to the realm. He'll do fine here, you can just tell.

There's an Irish family that just blew into town. There's a girl your age; her name is Riley. She is a whirlwind, drinking and flirting and sneaking out. She reminds me of me just before I had you. It makes me miss you. Though, you better be a good girl for your Aunt Faye. No boys until you're forty!

I do miss you. I can't go a day without thinking about how much of your life I've missed. I want to know all about what you're doing and who you're seeing. Someday it will be safe for us to be in the same place, and we will be the best of friends. I love you so much, you will always be my daughter. Please, write promptly and hold nothing back.

Your mother,

Raye Howard.

Audrey,

Things have only gotten better. Chuckie and I are an item. And by that I mean that he agreed to be my boyfriend. I think I'm falling in love with him, and I told him as much. He seemed to feel the same way.

I've been spending so much time at the estate, that I haven't really been to the inn much. The one time I was there, Miles(not my Miles..) told me that Grem and Chuckie's family aren't really on the best of terms. This is rather good information for me to know. Eggshells come to mind. I'd like to keep my friendships without damaging my relationship. Some things are the same everywhere.

I'm looking for a flat. A place to hang my hat and put my things. I feel like a home will make me feel more at ease, and perhaps the thing with Chuck will feel real and not like a dream. I want my life to be stable and simple once more. Once I have it, it may be safer for you to visit.

Tell your Aunt to give you a little more leeway. I'd love to visit, but I'm not sure it is yet safe. I'm looking into Christmas. Just to come see you, your aunt. I miss them very much. I met a family here that remembers us. Friends of Dara. It's weird to see people from home. Ask your Aunt Faye if she's found a way to go back. I don't think I would come, but I would feel better for you to spend your days there... to see the ocean again.

I'm busy now planning a party for Lydia. You'd like her. Maybe someday you'll meet her. She's small and fun. Reminds me of Aunt Felicity. I'll keep in touch, and let you know if there is anything else in my life.

Much love,
Your mother.