Saturday, 29 June 2013

?So, should I be calling you Jewell again?? She had barely walked in the door after a morning spent at the radio station and an afternoon spent eating corn dogs when Ishmerai accosted her with his question.

She blushed a little and laughed as she slid off her shoes. ?Oh, you listened to it??

?Of course. After you told me your mad scheme, I thought it best to see what damage you might cause.?

She rolled her eyes dramatically at his serious tone, walking over to take a seat next to him. ?And, what did you think??

?I think you enjoy making a spectacle of yourself.?

?A spectacle? Come now, Ishmerai, be reasonable. I thought I was very tame.?

?And incredibly silly.?

Jewell shrugged. ?That?s just who I am. I am not confined here by the rules of court etiquette, you know. I can do whatever I want. No rivals to outshine. No courtiers? favor to win.?

?Yes, yes. I know. You are free to be as ridiculous as you want, and somehow people love you all the more for it despite what a headache it is for me.?

She gave a sympathetic little pat to his knee; ?Poor dear.?

He ignored the gesture. ?So what do you think the general reaction will be?? He was still all business. ?Am I going to have to be scaring people off from pinching your behind??

She laughed. ?Generally positive, I hope. But I suppose we?ll see if I inspire any mob action with my return. Maybe a rabid group of fans waiting outside the hotel to glory in my presence? Or perhaps we?ll get some forgotten enemies out for some long awaited revenge. Who knows.?

?Lovely, Mira,? he chose to stick with the nickname he had given her as she had never answered his original question. ?How do you manage to be such a general security nightmare for me??

She grinned. ?It?s a special talent of mine.?

Tuesday, 9 July 2013

?Why are we shopping for nets?? Ishmerai asked, clearly puzzled as he followed Jewell through a store down by the docks. She kept picking up nets of different sizes, putting them down after appraising them for a moment.

?Because Tara and I ran out.? She held up one made of very thick rope and with huge holes in it. She shook her head, mumbling something before putting it back down.

?Yes, so you said. But what is it that you need the nets for??

She stole a sideways glance at Ishmerai before returning her gaze to the net she had in her hands currently. She explained quite casually: ?Oh, you know, catching men. Playing games. Things like that.?

He just stared at her. RhyDin was bringing out a side of his lady he had not fully seen before. ?Woman, you have clearly gone mad.?

She grinned, holding the perfect man-catching net up to him with both her hands to make sure a person couldn?t wiggle out of it somehow. ?I know. Isn?t it fun??

Saturday, 13 July 2013

Ishmerai had watched a dark-haired pirate stroll out of the Inn just minutes before, after having observed the same man sing his way into the Inn some time earlier, so he was not entirely surprised to find his lady making an appearance soon afterwards; he had a hunch, after all, who the man might have been. He watched Jewell step out of the Inn looking extremely flustered, conflicting emotions fighting for dominance to be expressed on her face. As soon as she was free of the public eye on the porch, however, sorrow clearly won out over all. Ishmerai stepped forward from against the tree he liked to lean upon and opened his arms to her.

Jewell practically flew down the steps, crashing into him with as much force as her poor, strained body could muster; Ishmerai didn?t even flinch. Her hands clung to him as she buried her face into his shirt. Tears were not far behind.

Ishmerai wrapped one arm firmly around her, his free hand coming up to stroke her scarlet hair. ?Shhh Mira, everything will be just fine, I promise.?

?It wasn?t supposed to hurt so much to see him, Merai! Why does it hurt so much?? Yes, she had felt extremely happy at the sight of Stephen; but sorrow, regret, and many other emotions had overwhelmed her in the end.

He shook his head. How could he possibly have an answer for her? ?That was Stephen then, Mira?? She nodded, her face now wrinkling and soaking his shirt with her tears. Ishmerai sighed, drawing them into the shadow of the tree outside the Inn for privacy. He was perhaps the only one Jewell had truly confided in when she was in Faerie; all those years before they met, she kept Stephen?her entire life in RhyDin, really?a secret in her heart. But Ishmerai knew. He knew how much that man had meant to her before. He knew that only the children could have completely torn her away from him as had happened. He spoke softly to her, talking into her hair: ?What did you expect, Mira? You know you gave your heart to him freely and completely at the time.?

She tilted her tearstained face up to look at him. ?It?s been so very long for me, Merai. I thought maybe I wouldn?t care so much. I shouldn?t really care so much. I had put all of this behind me. But seeing him... the touch of his hand...? She groaned, thumping her head against him again, her voice muffled by his shirt, ?I am truly pathetic.?

?Nonsense, Mira.? He stroked her back a little.

?I swore to myself that this would not happen. I swore I would be indifferent, friendly at best. But he was kissing those other women! And those were my kisses, Merai. They were supposed to be for me.?

He couldn?t help it; she sounded so truly indignant that he laughed at her. Taking her chin in his hand, he tiled her face up to look at him again. His smile was not unkind. ?Is that really so, Mira? And have you not given many kisses away to other men since you left? Broken a thousand hearts in Faerie??

She flushed, looking aside. ?Merai, don?t exaggerate.?

He laughed again, stepping back to settle both his hands on her shoulders. He watched her a moment, her grey eyes staring at nothing, before asking more seriously, ?Did he scorn you, Mira??

She shook her head from side to side, a little smile creeping up on her lips. She looked up to Ishmerai once more, ?No. He promised to see me again.?

?Of course he did.? He made it sound like the most natural thing in the world. He spun her around a bit then, draping his arm over her shoulder as he directed his steps towards their current home. Matching his pace, she tucked herself in at his side quite naturally. They walked in companionable silence for some minutes this way before he heard her sigh. ?What is it, Mira??

?He was even more handsome than I remembered.? Ishmerai just shook his head, giving her shoulders a little squeeze.

Sunday, 14 July 2013?Evening

They hadn?t been on speaking terms all day, but when Jewell stumbled out of the Outback with melting ice pressed against her cheek and misery written all over her face, she instantly went to Ishmerai. ?We need to go drinking,? she stated outright.

He waved his hand in front of his face as she breathed right into it. ?It smells like you?ve already done some drinking. And,? he pointed to her feet, ?you?ve lost your shoes.?

She shrugged. These were minor details really. ?I want to go drinking,? she repeated.

?Yes yes. I heard you the first time.? She really was impossible sometimes he thought as he draped his arm over her shoulders and guided her to the nearest watering hole that wasn?t the Dragon.

Jewell was two more drinks in before she started to get really chatty. ?I don?t care what you and Tara say, you know.?

Ishmerai, still nursing his first drink, raised his brows at her. ?What did Tara say??

?She said, ?Stay away from Stephen, Jewellsie. Let him go.?? She tried to imitate the red-head, but she really just sounded like herself.

?I suppose I should reprise my opinion of this Tara of yours. She?s clearly not completely insane; you should listen to her.?

?But you don?t understand, Ishmerai.? She slammed her beer mug on the table, splashing the contents about. ?I?m not doing anything wrong! It?s not like I lost him because I messed up or he really messed up. They,? she gestured wildly with the mug now losing more of her drink as she was somehow trying to indicate Faerie and the powers within those lands, ?went and fucked with my life. Conventina,? she added many expletive adjectives to her name, ?whose grave I made and then spit upon, ruined everything.?

?If I understand your history correctly, Mira,? Ishmerai interrupted quite calmly, ?your relationship with Stephen was really at an end before Conventina involved herself in your life at all.?

?Wrong!? Jewell pointed at him. ?I figured it out all for certain a long time ago, and you?re wrong. That bitch sent me?my own future fucking self?to come back and fuck with my mind. She pushed me to it, made sure I?d go and screw my relationship up with Stephen first. She made sure I was as alone and vulnerable as she could get me, frigid crafty snake, and then she struck! Struck at the heart of me.?

Ishmerai just listened silently now as Jewell worked herself up to basically shouting and possibly cursing more than he had ever heard her do before.

?They stole him from me, Merai. They stole him, they stole my children, and then they burnt my life to the ground.? She apparently ran out of steam at this point. Her mug went crashing to the table, quickly followed by her head buried in her arms. ?And no matter what I do, I just can?t seem to get any of it back.?

Monday, 15 July 2013?Evening

Ishmerai held the door of the suite open, giving Jewell quite the disapproving look as she waltz right past him with a smug look on her face. Kicking her shoes off, uncaring of where they landed, she sat on the small love seat in the room. She folded her hands primly in her lap and her posture was impeccable as she looked at Ishmerai expectantly, apparently awaiting whatever lecture he had in mind for her.

He closed the door slowly behind her before turning and just looking at her, refusing to breach the distance between them. This was not easy for him, even after all these years of knowing her. He had been trained as a proper Knight of the Courts of Faerie. He had served his first lady loyally: he did her every bidding; he stayed silently at her side, never once objecting to or offering his opinion on anything she had said or done; he had always maintained the proper amount of decorum in their relationship, always knowing his place. His entire life had been turned upside down by the little minx sitting in front of him. He was no longer a simple, humble Knight. He was at times closest friend, dearest confident, and adviser in matters both simple and dire (from what shoes she should wear today to how best to destroy her enemies utterly and fully). Jewell had broken down every barrier that was supposed to exist between them, but Ishmerai was still loathe to take advantage of the intimacy of their relationship at times. This was one of those times.

Jewell finally grew tired of waiting and lost that picture-perfect posture as she slouched back on the couch. ?Please, just spit it out already, Merai. I have had a very long day, which ended quite nicely if you must know. But I suspect you already know that,? he only nodded his head a touch to confirm her suspicions, ?and are simply waiting to ruin it. So, out with it.?

His tone was both formal and grave, ?I do not wish to ruin your evening.?

?I apologize. That was an unjust accusation. I realize you would not intentionally do so.?

He nodded again, accepting her apology. ?It would give me great pleasure to believe that a certain amount of happiness was within your reach again, Mira. You know this. I do not begrudge you any happiness that you may find. I know few people more deserving of it then you.?

?But?? She knew there was a ?but? in there somewhere.

?But, I believe you are making a mistake. I do not see this leading to happiness, simply more heartache for you. Must I continue to watch you suffer time and again??

Jewell sighed, leaning her head back and closing her eyes a minute. She kept them closed at first when she started speaking again, ?I do not know where this will lead me, Ishmerai.? She lifted her head, grey eyes meeting his. ?I don?t. I just know that it feels so right right now.?

?What about his wife, Jewell??

She groaned, letting her head fall back again. ?I don?t know.? She ran her hands through her hair in frustration, wincing a little as she touched the part of her skull that had hit the mat in the Outback. ?But you know,? she looked at him again, ?Stephen was mine first.? She offered this childish argument with just a hint of defiance to her voice.

He made a sound of disgust, throwing his hands up. ?You are infuriating.?

As Ishmerai stalked towards his own room, apparently unable to handle any more of her nonsense for the night, she couldn?t help but push him a little further. ?Wait, you don?t want to hear about our kiss?? He slammed the door as his answer. Jewell just sighed, laying her head back down on the couch. ?I am a terrible person.?

Thursday, 18 July 2013

?Thank you for seeing her here safely, Lady Judge. I am sorry if this has caused you trouble in any way,? Ishmerai thanked Issy upon her delivery to the hotel suite of a somewhat intoxicated, bloody and bruised Jewell. He took over from there, cringing at what a mess she looked: Stephen had set her nose all right, and it would certainly heal properly on its own, but at the moment it looked terribly bruised and swollen. He helped her to the love seat, brushing her hair out of her face tenderly. ?You are a mess.?

Jewell groaned in return, ?I feel absolutely terrible.?

?I am sure. What would possess you to drink so much after breaking your nose, you silly girl? That alone would make you dizzy and nauseous.?

She closed her eyes to stop the world from spinning; she absolutely would not have made it home without Issy to lean on. ?I noticed.?

?Are you going to be sick?? She shook her head ever so slightly. ?Good. I?m going to get you cleaned up and then we can get you into bed.? She murmured something about bed and sleep as he left the room, returning with a bowl of warm water, some towels, and a jar of a salve she had insisted on buying the first week they were in RhyDin. Ishmerai started to work with the water and towels first, gently cleaning the blood from her face and wherever else she got it: neck, arms, hands. He encouraged her to speak to him quietly as he worked, ?I hope your dueling opponent looks much worse.?

?Maybe,? she took one of the towels from him, clumsily washing her hands off. He watched her for a moment before taking the towel back from her and completing the task much more thoroughly; Jewell was too tired to object. ?I brained him pretty good with the scepter, and possibly blew out one of his knees.?

?Why did he hit you in the face so hard??

?Jealous probably.?

?Of course. Did Issy tend to you at the Inn? She is a very good friend to you, Mira.?

?Absolute best there is,? Jewell agreed. ?But she wasn?t the only one there. Stephen fixed my nose.?

It was the first time she had mentioned his name to Ishmerai that evening, and Ishmerai waited a moment for more information that was not forthcoming. He therefore felt the need to prompt her a little: ?And how was Stephen this evening?? Clearly there was more behind this amount of drinking than even some severe pain; he had known her to weather worse injuries with no assistance at all.

?I don?t care,? she mumbled stubbornly at first, turning her head away from him.

?Mira,? he whispered softly, tilting her chin back gently so that she faced him again in order to allow him to apply the salve to her face. It quickly mixed with her tears, however.

?What if he?s just playing with me, Merai?? She tried to sniff, but it was all the more pathetic because her nose was still quite swollen. ?There was this girl there tonight, and she called him ?brother.? Did he just think I wouldn?t notice? That I wouldn?t notice how he stumbled over how to introduce me to her? ?Jewell Ravenlock.? So distant, like I?m just some girl that doesn?t mean anything.?

He wiped her tears away with care, reapplying the salve to her face. He even snuck some onto the nasty bruise Tommy had left on her arm to help that heal faster as well. ?Mira, you are only going to get hurt this way.?

She shook her head, turning it away from him again. ?I?m already hurt, Merai.?

Monday, 22 July 2013

?It was just so weird.?

?Uhuh, why is that?? Ishmerai flipped a page of the book he was reading, not even looking down at the woman laying on the couch next to him.

Jewell stared at the ceiling, her mind elsewhere. ?Because... it?s Lain! We?re not supposed to get along.?

?Those quarrels are long over I thought.?

?Well yeah. It just seems weird to get along with Alex?s wife.? She made a face. It was weird to say that out loud; for how many years had that expression belonged to her and her only?

?You care about Alex, right??

?I guess. I mean, I haven?t seen him in forever. But he?s still Alex.?

Ishmerai still didn?t once look at her, eyes locked on his book. ?Then it?s not really surprising at all. You care about Alex in some way. Alex clearly cares about Lain. Therefore, you care about Lain in some way because Alex cares about her.?

She arched her neck back to look at him. ?You over-simplify everything.?

He reached down and pat her head, but he continued to read. He let a few minutes of silence pass between them before he just had to point out: ?You owe her now for fixing your face, you know.?

Jewell groaned, covering her healed face with her arms. ?I think I?d rather just break my nose again.?

Monday, 29 July 2013

As she struggled to step into the bathtub, Ishmerai was suddenly at her side, holding her arm as she eased herself into the steaming water. She couldn?t miss the dark look on his face as he stared at the large, hand-shaped bruise that stood out in inflamed, vivid contrast to the fair skin of her derri?re. ?It?s just a bruise, Merai. Don?t go losing your head like my brother.?

?Perhaps he was right to. What are you playing at here, Mira? Letting people touch you like that.?

She slowly adjusted her body in the tub, trying not to put any pressure on her offended backside because it hurt like hell. A little groan slipped from her lips as she twisted a little too much. ?I?m not playing at anything. There is a time for everything, after all, Merai. You should be proud that I kept my head so coolly this evening; I?ve clearly learned something all those years at court.?

?You should have taken him out the second he tried to touch you, there in front of everyone. You could have.?

?Maybe.? Finding the most comfortable position, Jewell slowly let her head rest back against the bath-pillow, closing her eyes. ?I?ll handle it eventually.?

?Jewell...?

?Look, I get it!? She snapped her eyes open, frowning at him. ?He?s a problem, and I will handle it. I just can?t think about it right now.? Ishmerai sighed when she covered her face with her hand, as if she was trying to block out the world. ?It?s waited this long, it can wait a little longer.? There was too much going on in her head, threatening to overwhelm her, choking her with the weight of memories: Stephen, the children, her magic, Faerie courts, RhyDin politics, the smell of Skyler?s burnt hair as it filled her nostrils. ?I just... I can?t handle it right now.?

?There is nothing wrong with that, Mira,? he spoke softly to her, watching as her eyes closed tiredly again. ?You have others willing to step up, to help you in this matter, in many matters.?

?I don?t want anyone?s help.? He shook his head at her stubbornness. It was going to be the end of both of them; he was sure of it. She let several moments of silence pass between them before speaking up again: ?There?s something going on in the sewers. I don?t know what, but I want to know.?

?Yes, because involving yourself in more matters is clearly the solution here,? Ishmerai replied dryly. ?You are going to make yourself ill with all this meddling. Even worse, you are going to drive me crazy.?

The corners of her lips turned up with the hint of a smile. ?Mission accomplished.?

Sunday, 4 August 2013

It was closer to dawn than midnight when Ishmerai finally found her; she liked to elude him at times, sending him on a wild and wandering chase through the city. Before dawn had touched the sky with orange and pink, he came upon Jewell sitting on an apparently random city bench. Her fancy glass?stolen from the Inn with the umbrella still intact?was empty in her hand. The golden scepter lay across her lap as both encouragement and then deterrent to muggers; she only had to brain two people during the night before others knew to leave her alone.

Jewell was very pale, her skin somewhat luminescent in the early-morning darkness, and she didn?t look at him as he took a seat next to her. He started out on neutral ground: ?How did dueling go this evening??

She shrugged a little, eyes still straight ahead. The thrill of victory against an experienced opponent was gone with the flavor of the rest of the evening, ?I beat Jake Thrash.?

?You should be proud of yourself. All the training is starting to ?pay off?, I believe the saying goes.? Jewell just shrugged again; victory was still far from her mind. ?So what happened afterwards? I saw you safely amongst friends at the Inn. Was not Stephen there??

She gave a rusty little laugh, ?Oh, Stephen was there all right. As was his wife.? Despite her behavior earlier in the evening, there was just a touch of bitterness to accompany the word ?wife.?

?Ahh,? Ishmerai nodded, sitting back more and staring at the nothing that had engaged her attention. ?So how did it go??

?Well..? Jewell closed her eyes, replaying the evening in her head and recounting it for Ishmerai: the initial greetings, Diana?s statement that Jewell wanted her dead, the ensuing conversation in the booth, Stephen leaving and Diana eventually going after him. She narrated?including words, tones, and facial expressions?in a detached manner, as if she had just been a spectator and not a key player in the performance. When she was done, she opened her eyes, but she still could not look at him.

?I admit to being a little confused here. This is Stephen you are speaking about? Stephen, the one you have been pining over these last few weeks??

She scowled, ?I wasn?t pining. I told you that. I was confused.?

?Semantics,? he replied with a hint of a smile. That got her to relax as she rolled her eyes at him before he continued, ?So you have been pining over this man,? he grinned at her noise of frustration, ?and then you just tell him and his wife never mind??

?I didn?t quite say never mind.?

He continued with his train of thought as if she hadn?t said anything, ?She is telling you try out your marriage again since it is not your fault it ended. Maybe you can make it work. Stephen is telling you that he loves you still, even if he loves her as well. He told you a few weeks ago that he wants you in his life. The woman is willing to step aside, or so she says, and you let her go after him? You tell them that you have had your chance and now it is their turn? You told him to move on?since you never thought you would be back anyways?and you are sticking with that??

His incredulous tone irked her. Was it so impossible that she would do the right and good thing? ?You are oversimplifying again. Yes, it was not truly my fault that my marriage ended, but I did make those choices, Merai. I chose to push him away. I chose to leave. Well, I may not have had a choice in leaving, but I chose to leave the way I did. And honestly? I would do it all over again. I cannot have regrets about those decisions.?

?You do not need to punish yourself for things that were out of your control, Mira. You did what you had to do.?

?Yes, I did. That meant certain sacrifices. I accepted that a long time ago,? she spoke more quietly now. ?You make me sound so capricious, Merai, but do not forget: I had a very long time to come to terms with this situation. I have had many years to try and forget Stephen; I thought I had done so successfully.?

?If that is so, then why did you pursue him at all??

She laughed mirthlessly, ?That?s the question, isn?t it? I thought I was done with it all, ancient history they call it. And then I see him and,? she shook her head. ?It doesn?t feel like it is over.?

?And what if he truly feels the same way??

?I find it hard to believe, Merai.? There was that scowl again, directed at the city street in front of her. He let her think, seeing the conflicting emotions battling for dominance. ?I mean...? she finally spoke up again reluctantly, ?maybe it?s just my glamour that draws him to me, not love.?

?Do not even think such things, Mira!? He admonished harshly. ?You did not enchant that man.? He reached over, turning her face gently so she had to look at him. ?If he loves you, it is because he loves you for you.?

She shook her head free, brooding for a moment. Then she shook her head decisively, clearing her thoughts away. ?Regardless, it does not matter. He made his choice. That should be that.?

?Are you willing to still live with that choice? To let him be with some other woman??

?I told him clearly: I deserve to be wanted entirely and completely. If there is a question in his mind on what to do, about who to be with, then... well, isn?t that clear? There shouldn?t be such indecision in these matters, so I do not think that now I would be satisfied if he chose me in the end. This isn?t just some game her can play, take his time with. And frankly, if I were Diana, I wouldn?t want him if he chose me. How does she know he will not always be thinking of me instead?? She made a disgusted sound, ?The whole thing is awful. Truly.?

?What are you going to do then??

She laughed that mirthless, depressed laugh again, running her hand across her face. ?I am not quite sure. But you should know by now, Merai, that I willing to do whatever I think is necessary.? She sighed, ?If that means living without Stephen, then so be it. I have survived this long, after all.?

Sunday, 11 August 2013

?So, that was Lain.? Ishmerai remarked after Jewell had seen their guest to the door and returned to kitchen to continue putting utensils and plates away.

?Mmmhmm,? she didn?t turn to look at him as he leaned against the kitchen island, watching her.

?I think I like her. Though she seems to speak a different language sometimes. Quite odd.?

Here Jewell snorted with laughter, closing a cabinet and turning to look at Ishmerai as she leaned back against the counter top. ?Yes, she does.?

?I am glad you had someone to help you with the children?s rooms, someone you could speak about them to as you worked.? Her eyes flitted away from him as she nodded. ?That was kind of her.?

?It was.? Jewell nodded again before looking back to Ishmerai. ?Did you hear what else she had to say? About what Brian said??

?I did. I assumed that you did not mind me overhearing with the volume you two ladies speak at.?

That earned a little smile, crushed quickly under the distress she was feeling. ?Why? Why would he say something so horrible about me, Ishmerai? I am no stranger to slander, surely, but my brother? And such lies as these! To say that I would defend a rapist? After everything that I have been through..? there was a little catch in her voice as she struggled on. ?And for me to defend Tommy? Tommy! Why, the very thought is so abhorrent, disgusting, depraved...?

Ishmerai closed the short distance between them before she lost it completely. He wrapped his arms about her and drew her against his chest, forcing her to free her death-hold on the counter and cling to him instead. ?Do not think of those things, Mira. They are behind you.?

?But a rapist, Merai. How could he say that? How could he even think it??

?Perhaps it is a simple misunderstanding, Mira.?

She tilted her head back to look up at him, ?But Lain said...?

?Yes, I know. And that was very good of her to come and share her concerns with you. But you must not worry over it so. There will be time to clear the air between the two of you. You must give him a chance to explain himself. Then we will worry.? She conceded to his calm logic, letting her forehead fall against his chest with a soft thunk.

Sunday, 8 September 2013

The mid-afternoon sun came streaming in through the floor to ceiling windows of the great room, setting Jewell?s masquerade dress on fire. The gold paint on her outstretched arm and hand glimmered and gleamed, casting little flecks of light around the room as she turned it this way and that. ?I think you should go and lay down,? Ishmerai said, standing stiffly in the center of the room, watching her. He too was still in his masquerade attire, although it was not very different from his normal garb as the knight had not been amongst the revelers last night.

?I am lying down,? she replied stubbornly, eyes studious on the dancing gold reflections rather than on him.

?I meant in bed. To sleep. You have had an extremely busy night and a very trying morning. The masquerade was a success.? Her expression soured at that, but he continued on: ?But you have not had a moment of rest since yesterday morning.?

Ignoring Ishmerai?s intended topic, she chose her own. ?I would not call the party a success, Merai.?

He remained patient with her this afternoon, ?By the initial count, you earned the Sisters of Scathach an enormous amount of money; they can easily fund the rebuilding of their temple now.?

?So it was a spectacularly successful failure then.? She leveraged herself upright, the phoenix?s fire colored hair mussed from the after-party activities and stress.

?You did not fail...?

?But I did!? She cut him off, emphasizing her frustration with the pounding of gold clenched fists on the couch cushions. ?Those were my people, my workers, and I failed to ensure their safety. I failed them.?

?You are taking this too personally, Mira? He tried to reason with her calmly. ?This attack was not directed against you.?

?Too personally, Ishmerai? Really? Was it not personal to attack my workers at my restaurant during the party that I was throwing? Was it not personal then for me to have to inform their families, to tell them...? her voice, rusty from exertion, faded into nothing.

Silence reigned between them for some minutes before Ishmerai finally spoke up, ?If you will not rest, then how can I assist you??

Jewell stood, the gold dress pooling around her bare feet. ?I am going to get cleaned up since I have some things to take care of still. I need you to find Sapphire.?

The request apparently took him by surprise, ?I think there are better ways I could be of service to you.?

?No,? her tone brooked no argument. ?For my peace of mind, if the girl is still in the city, I want her here. You said the attack wasn?t personal, Ishmerai, but I am choosing to take it so. I have given those of the Temple of Bhaal another target. I do not trust them. When they find a weakness, they exploit it. Find her and drag her kicking and screaming, if you must, back to this house.?

?As you wish, m?lady.? Bowing at the waist, Ishmerai departed to do his lady?s bidding.

Wednesday, 2 October 2013

?I do not think you should go out this evening,? Ishmerai commented for possibly the fourth time as Jewell moved around her closet, picking out an outfit that would properly cover her bandages. She turned and made a blah blah blah gesture at her knight. He couldn?t help but smile; his life was a little more peaceful since his lady could not currently talk without doing further damage to her throat. ?I know, I kept you inside all yesterday and today. But Jewell, you were badly injured, and it was just two nights ago. Your shoulders are still bleeding because you refuse to sit still, your throat was very badly bruised?you are lucky you did not suffer permanent damage?and you have a concussion.?

She paused in her search to grab a notebook she had left on a nearby chair, flip through it, and hold up a note she had written earlier in marker: I know all of this.

?I know you know. You seem to always forget that it is my job to keep you safe. Since you make that nearly impossible the majority of the time, the least you can do is be a good patient.? Jewell was apparently ignoring him because she continued to search through her closet, wincing as she tried to reach for something. ?You also need to heal up properly if you want to be of any use in IFL.?

There it was! He had her attention now. She turned and pouted at him a little, looking so genuinely pathetic that he crossed the room and took down the dress she had been trying to reach for unsuccessfully. ?All right, fine. Just for a little while, though. And I wait outside the door the entire time.? She made a little ?squee? of happiness, hugging him very carefully.

Sunday, 13 October 2013

Jewell stood in the small vestibule of her house, dripping wet and shivering uncontrollably. Her blue hair clung to her neck and face as she stood there, struggling to pull off her ruined, leather boots with one hand planted against the wall. Her jeans, heavy with water, made the whole process ten times harder. The tears running unchecked down her face also didn?t help much.

Ishmerai appeared in the hallway silently, watching her with concern for a moment before interrupting, ?Dare I even ask what happened??

She tore her right boot of with a growl, throwing it needlessly against the wall with a thunk. ?Issy attacked me in the marketplace.? Any progress she had made on regaining her voice had been completely undone by the late-afternoon?s encounter, leaving it hoarse and weak.

It was rare for Jewell?s knight to be wholly taken by surprise, but he stared at his lady in complete disbelief now. ?Come again??

The other boot came off with an aggravated pull before it joined its sister against the wall. ?Issy attacked me in the marketplace,? she stated again as if Ishmerai truly hadn?t heard her.

?I... no.? He shook his head, changing what he had intended to say. ?Are you okay? Did she hurt you?? Jewell shook her head numbly. Now that her boots were off, she just stood there, arms wrapping around herself more for comfort than for the warmth she dearly needed as her body trembled. ?What happened?? He demanded as she remained silent.

?I don?t know!? She snapped back, emotions running high from the accusations Isuelt had hurled at her. ?I mean, I think there?s something wrong with her. That chick Katt said something about Renna.. and she wasn?t acting like herself, but I just don?t know!?

?How did you get away unscathed?? He questioned her, clearly confused. He meant no offense to his liege lady, but Lady Isuelt was clearly superior in both physical condition and fighting prowess.

Jewell swallowed hard, eyes captured by her socks as she curled and uncurled her toes within their soggy confines. ?I ran off. I tried to get her to follow me, and she did for a little while. But then I lost her. I don?t know where she ran off to.? She paused for a moment before adding in a defiant whisper, ?And I don?t care.?

He watched her carefully. There was nothing left to her voice now, and she was clearly distraught over the encounter; it was no good to continue to draw the story from her at the moment. ?Come.? Bridging the distance between them, he wrapped an arm around her. ?We need to get you warm. Imagine, Jewell Ravenlock, catching her death from the cold? How unfitting.? He tried to jest with her, but the attempt fell on deaf ears. Jewell was mentally back in the marketplace, replaying everything Issy had said to her, all those accusations that rang so very true, while Ishermai lead her further into the house.

Monday, 4 November 2013

Jewell kicked some crunchy leaves out of her way as she walked back to Old Market from the Inn, Ishmerai at her side. It had been a while since she had been out and about at night at the Inn, her attention split between the IFL season and trying to get her neighborhood back on its feet. When Ishmerai had accused her of avoiding the Inn in an attempt to avoid Issy, she had ducked the issue easily. He kept trying to bring it up again though, like now. ?Did you see any of your friends this evening?? He asked politely, but she knew what he really wanted to know.

?Issy wasn?t there,? she replied a bit shortly.

?I did not inquire after Lady Isuelt particularly,? he reminded her with a smile.

Jewell huffed and kicked at another small pile of leaves, watching them scatter in the breeze. ?Whatever. I knew what you meant.?

?You will have to mend the breach between you sooner or later. Preferably sooner as I know she is very important to you.?

?Yeah yeah.? She brushed him off with that. The Empress never liked to hear what she already knew, and she did know that at some point she would have to approach Issy, sit down, and have a serious talk about what the Judge had said to her. Jewell just hadn?t figured out the best way to go about doing that. Until she did, she was content to hang out in the Arena and Outback where she had less of a chance of running into her friend.

?So I ask again: did you see any of your friends this evening??

She rolled her eyes before relenting to his question with a nod. ?I saw Skyler.? His inquiring look prompted her to add, ?And I think I upset him by kissing Rand.?

?Your teammate?? Ishmerai frowned at her confirming nod which was coupled with that devilish little grin of hers. ?That does not seem like one of your wisest choices.?

Again she rolled her eyes. ?Whatever. It was just a kiss. It?s not like I slept with him, although,? her grinned now turned to positively wicked, ?I?m not opposed to the idea.?

?Naturally.? They shared a conspirators look. Ishmerai, born and raised in Faerie, thought nothing of his lady?s exploits with men. ?Still, I do not believe that sleeping with your teammates is a terrific idea at the moment.?

?Maybe it?ll boost team morale if we keep losing,? Jewell offered up playfully.

?Perhaps. Or it will cause all sorts of trouble, like that time you were working on the merchant treaty.?

?That didn?t turn out sooo bad,? she countered.

?Half the council walked out during the drafting and two of the head merchants were wrestling on the ground, fighting for your favor!? He continued despite her burst of laughter at the memory, ?And the treaty was not completed for weeks after the deadline because of the fallout.?

?Okay okay. No sleeping with teammates until the season is over.? She waited a moment as they continued down the street before piping up: ?But what about opponents? Surely they?re fair game, and maybe I?ll cause such a distraction that I can actually win a few bouts!?

Her knight shook his head with a laugh, ?Not exactly the strategy I had in mind, but it may certainly work.?

Monday, 11 November 2013

Ishmerai?s brow creased as he watched his lady come down the street from the Inn and Outback towards him. ?What happened? You seem? happy.? His eyes narrowed suspiciously, ?Your feet are not even touching the ground.?

It was true. Jewell felt as light as air tonight, and she walked like it. There were several centimeters of space between her bare soles and the ground with each of her bouncing foot-falls. ?I?m just having a lovely night! So don?t look so glum about my happiness,? she poked at her knight?s midsection playfully.

He brushed her hand away, eyeing her like she was some strange, foreign creature. ?Have you been drinking??

?No,? she laughed. ?I mean, some pixie sticks and coffee but nothing more than that.?

?Uhuh..? he took up pace alongside her as she continued on her way, his booted feet just as quiet as her airy footsteps even though he tread the leaf-strewn ground. ?Do you plan on telling me what has you bursting with such unnatural giddiness?? he quizzed dryly. The Jewell he was familiar with was not often carried away by such emotions; she was a more serious, more calculating, more controlled woman than the Empress that the denizens of RhyDin were used to. This was a serious departure from that, and he wasn?t quite sure what to make of it.

?I saw Skid!?

The knight had to dig through his memory?a catalogue of countless names and places he had to remember from her history rather than his own?to place the name. ?A friend of mixed heritage that you have not seen since your return.?

Jewell rolled her eyes with a laugh, ?You sound like a book, but yes, that?s close enough. It made me so happy! I just finished fighting Kimone?who beat me again, by the way?and bam! There he was! I could have just sat there on the ground tangled up with him all night.? She didn?t miss the rueful shake of his head or the little smile that touched the corner of Ishmerai?s lips as she continued, ?It was like the best surprise ever. And he doesn?t hate me for disappearing, and he didn?t really seem angry either. He just seemed happy.?

?It amazes me that you are continually surprised by people?s joy at seeing you alive.?

Her teeth worked along her bottom lip, ?Well.. I just? it?s hard to think that anyone would really care. I mean, sure people would be upset at first, but after a while, why does it matter if I?m here or not, dead or alive??

?Jewell??

?No. I know. I know that?s wrong. Obviously it?s wrong. I mean, I?ve seen that now. Skid was so happy, and Issy, Brian, Harris, Tara.. even Lain didn?t seem disappointed that I was alive. It just goes against everything in my head.? They both fell silent as this was a topic they had traced and retraced several times now. ?I just... What have I ever done to deserve this??

?Hm?? He turned his face towards her as he didn?t quite hear her whispered question, but her eyes were trained on her bare feet. He wondered for a moment where her shoes had gone.

?Nothing,? she smiled at him.

Friday 22 November 2013

Jewell exited the Outback with only the slightest shudder at the horrors continuing within: Mel and Vanion fighting in the pit while the Mandalorians burned in the air above them. Her steps were calm, her body rigidly controlled, as she walked several feet down the street; she needed some distance before allowing the shiny veneer of her artfully crafted social mask to crack. When she was far enough away, both her hands flew to cover her mouth and stifle the scream--building deep within her all night--into a painful groan.

The smell of her hands made her gag, bile building in the back of her throat as she yanked them away from her face. The imagined stench of fire and burning flesh was everywhere: her hands, her hair, her clothes. It invaded her nose, her mouth, her brain, invoking memories of her house and life burning down around her, her children torn from her arms. She couldn?t escape it, so she ran from it like she always did.

Ishmerai found her a half hour later submerged, fully clothed, in her giant bathtub. He watched as she kept even her head underwater, only surfacing when the need to breathe became too much before dunking herself back under again. The knight waited through several repetitions of this cycle before attempting to interrupt it, ?There are more traditional ways to clean your clothes.?

She clearly considered disappearing beneath the water again but resisted the urge for the moment. ?I needed to get the smell out of everything.? It didn?t matter that the scents were all in her head, untouched by the water she hoped would cleanse her of the touch of memories.

His lady, who he knew to be extraordinarily brave and strong, sounded so tiny and fragile. She looked it too, with her large grey eyes peering at him, soaked strands of blue hair plastered to her face. ?And what smell would that be?? he asked more kindly as he entered the room and came to kneel at the side of the tub.

Jewell closed her eyes to conjure up what she had seen earlier in the evening, ?Burning, death, and destruction.?

?That is a rather potent and awful combination,? he remarked in all seriousness. Ishmerai did not take his lady?s distaste for fire lightly, and he did not hesitate to take the pruney hand that snuck out of the tub to grasp on to his like the lifeline it was. Uncomfortable as it was, he stayed by her side in silence as they both waited for the water to work.

Friday 18 April 2014

?Well, you seem awfully pleased with yourself,? Ishmerai observed to the bouncing, blue-haired woman who was humming to herself as she exited the Inn.

?I am,? Jewell replied, pausing to kiss her knight?s cheek in passing, much to his surprise.

He shook his head with a smile, taking up his position besides her as they walked towards Old Market. ?Did you win a duel??

?A duel?? she asked confused, lost in her own thoughts.

?Yes, a duel.? Ishmerai grinned as he explained slowly: ?One of those fights you sometimes like to participate in.? At her still puzzled expression, he questioned her, ?You were in the Annex this evening, weren?t you??

?Oh yes! Jake Thrash won the Madness Tournament.?

?And that is what you are so happy about?? It was the knight?s turn to look confused.

?No,? she laughed at the absurdity of his question. ?I mean, it?s nice that Jake won but..?

?Oh good! Because if you remember correctly, you did not bet on him.?

?Yes yes,? she brushed off the reminder of her failed attempt at picking the winner, but the sudden thought of who she had picked had her grinning again.

Noting the grin, Ishmerai raised his eyebrows. ?All right, woman. Out with it!?

She practically gushed out to him: ?I will be dancing with Kalamere at Beltane.?

?Ahh I should have known this had something to do with a man. Ow!? He rubbed his arm where Jewell had just punched him.

?Don?t act like I get all moony over every man who talks to me.?

?I apologize. You only get all starry-eyed over half of the men who.. hey hey!? Ishmerai moved easily out of the way of her swinging fist this time.

?Be serious! I really like him.?

?But I thought he was not interested in relationships.?

Jewell shrugged, ?I don?t think he is, but who says I am? I have had my share of serious relationships?most ending in epic disaster, by the way. I think it is time for something a little less serious but still entirely enjoyable.?

?Mmmhm..? he mumbled, staring aside at her as they navigated the busy, midnight streets of Dragon?s Gate. ?And what about Captain Stephen Kidd, hm??

She scowled, ?Why must you ruin my good mood by bringing that up? It?s done and over, Merai. Period. He is married to someone else for Nature?s sake! And I may be many unpleasant things, but I am not a home-wrecker. I am also not one to pine desperately over someone who is not interested in me.?

?But you love him, Mira.?

?Enough!? She paused, stomping her bare foot on the cobblestone street. ?I have heard enough about Stephen Kidd. Please, just let it go, Merai.?

He sighed, ?Fine. Subject dropped. Now what do you plan to wear for Beltane to dance with Baron Kalamere??

It took her a moment to regain her composure before she resumed her more mischievous grin, ?Well.. I may have mentioned body paint to Kal just now..?

Monday 21 April 2014

After she parted ways with Kalamere outside the Outback, Jewell stopped a moment and held out the wooden box he had given her, simply staring at it. The streetlamps lent an almost ghoulish look to her severely bruised face, shadows melding with the black, purples, and blues marring her skin. She remained still for some time, thoughtful, only noticing Ishmerai?s presence directly in front of her when he cleared his throat and she looked up.

He looked angry.

The knight?s brows were knit together in consternation as he stared at his lady?s overall state of being: her left eye bloodshot and swollen, bruises blossoming along both sides of her jaw to match the ones on her arms and legs, and the scent of whiskey on her breath. Jewell could see his cheek move as he began to grind his teeth together, biting back all he wanted to say to her.

The Empress held up the wooden box to show him, sounding extremely confused, ?He gave me a present.?

?How nice.?

She ignored his tone of voice, perhaps his very presence, as she wondered aloud: ?It is so thoughtful. And nice.?
Ishmerai breathed out slowly to calm himself enough to respond, ?Is that so unusual for the Baron??

?Noo..? Jewell answered slowly with a shake of her head. ?It isn?t unusual. I simply cannot remember the last time someone even gave me a present.? Yes, Tara had given her a cell phone recently, but Tara had girl-parts so she did not really count for this conversation.

?Do not be so silly,? he spoke dismissively. ?You received many gifts from many different admirers on an almost daily basis back home.?

?Yes but those don?t count.? Ishmerai raised his eyebrows questioningly causing her to sigh. ?All those jewels, love poems.. that one gift of a changeling which was rather awful, they were meaningless. Those men just threw them at my feet to impress me and win my favor for political reasons or for the sake of their own vanity. Kalamere..? she paused as she attempted to articulate what had her so surprised, ?he actually thought about this. And then he didn?t just give me my present?a mentorship with the Diamond by the way,? she smiled at the way Ishmerai?s eyes widened a touch, ?but then he went through the trouble of finding a unique way to present it to me. He really put time into this.?

?Granted, that was a very nice gesture, but I am not understanding why you are so confused by all this.?

?It?s just been so long since someone has really taken the time to be this nice to me, and I guess I just don?t understand why. Like.. why bother??

Her knight shook his head. For all his lady?s pride, she could be incredibly modest and self-deprecating.. or maybe she was just incredibly dense. ?Mira..? he spoke patiently, ?perhaps he fancies you.? He paused to let that sink in before delivering his critique: ?Though I honestly cannot fathom why. Really m?lady, with that eye? You are looking positively repulsive. You will be lucky to entice the river-workers at this rate.?

?You?d be luck to entice the river-workers,? she imitated him with an affected sneer. ?What a brat.?

Sunday 4 May 2014

Jewell was fortunate that the knight who protected her not only loved her dearly but was smart enough to have a carriage waiting outside the Observatory to collect her after the second evening of Beltane festivities. She made it down the walk fine and to the carriage without even the slightest misstep or tangling her feet in the length of her sheer gown; really, practice did make perfect since Jewell was unable to count the nights she had spent in a similar state when beyond the veil, wandering the extensive and sprawling Ta-Neer manor saturated with the family?s best wine to bring a happy haze to all her dark thoughts. Ishmerai frowned as he carefully handed her in to the chaise and four, shaking his head as he followed. A word to the driver, and the wheels were spinning them back to their house in Old Market.

?Damnit!? Jewell punched the inside wall of the carriage, her coordination somewhat skewed by the liquor burning through her veins. ?Damn damn damn damn damn,? each repetition was joined by her fists slamming into the seat, the wall, whatever she could hit.

Ishmerai watched the display dispassionately, but the driver seemed alarmed. He slowed the carriage, turning his head back to plead with his passenger: ?Please Miss, dinnae injure my carriage!?

?Shut up!? She shouted, pointing at the driver who nervously turned his attention back to the cobblestone streets. The man was lucky she didn?t have shoes on, for surely she would have thrown them.

Ishmerai sat forward, speaking quietly to put the poor man?s mind at ease before turning back to his now-glowering companion. ?Really, Mira.. it could not have been so bad.?

?He thinks he can just show up like nothing is wrong, drink, dance..? she was practically spitting out the words in her anger. The concern for Stephen?s well-being of the other day had slowly melted into a simmering anger.

?Did you not do the same only last night?? He was not deterred by the glare sent his way. ?Really Mira, be fair. Does the poor man not deserve an evening to forget the world as well as you do??

?No,? she huffed.

?Obstinate, headstrong woman,? he admonished.

Saturday 10 May 2014

Her motive was ridiculous, but Jewell attempted to close the front door of the house quietly behind her, remove her high-heels, and creep down the hallway. The moon, already descending as the early morning hours wore on, cast enough light for her to avoid the numerous obstacles she had left for herself--shoes, the Old Temple scepter, a pile of books and parchments--and make it triumphantly to the drawing room. Such triumph was short lived as Ishmerai was there waiting for her.

?Really?? he asked incredulously as he noted the shoes in her hand and the careful way she had moved into the room. In that one word, she read his entire question: ?Really? How many years have we spent together and still you think you can sneak past me somehow??

She grinned, the unrepentant teenager breaking curfew; it had been hours since she had left the Arena and wandered off with Kalamere without word or notice to her knight. ?I figured it was worth a try.?

He rolled his eyes before his brow creased, puzzled, as Jewell threw her shoes down on the floor and collapsed in that graceful, effortless manner of hers onto a couch. ?Why is your dress wet? And your hair?? Her smile gained a cat-ate-the-canary curve. ?Midnight walk on the beach again?? She shook her head. He could see that she was eager to share, her casual sprawl abandoned as she leaned forward and grinned at him. ?Well, out with it then,? he waved his hand, resigned to hearing as much of the story as she wished to divulge.

?We went dancing at that place on Drake in Dragon?s Gate, the one where the dance floor is technically the street??

?Yes, I recall the location. I did not realize that the Baron was such an avid dancer.?

?Well you know.. with the right partner,? she shrugged carelessly, but he could not miss the clear implication that she was obviously the right dance partner for the Baron and many other men. It was a dig at him because her knight had steadfastly refused to dance with her on almost every occasion, except for that one time in Carpenyal.

?The dancing does not explain the state of your dress.?

?Oh.. we just went swimming after because we got a bit warm,? she affected casualness poorly. His brows raised in question, but those details she kept to herself. The large houses in New Haven. The thrill of trespassing. Decadent pools with inviting aqua and turquoise shades. She hadn?t hesitated to kick off her shoes and wade right into the water fully clothed, her dress clinging like a second skin of sheer, silver material. She turned to Kal with a smile, beckoning for him to join her.

Ishmerai stood from his chair slowly, ?I am glad you had an enjoyable evening. Although, I hope you realize that just because you have returned to your old habit of late nights, it does not mean you are excused from waking up at dawn to run.?

She groaned, falling dramatically back on the couch again, ?But my feet,? she gestured to them, ?from dancing..?

?No excuses,? he pat her on the head on his way out of the room.

Monday, 26 May 2014

?So obviously you were quite happy to see the Baron again last night,? Ishmerai observed.

?Mmhmm,? Jewell walked with her hands clasped behind her head, face still a bit flushed from their run. They were wandering back to the house at a leisurely pace, taking their time since she didn?t have to go over to Old Temple for weapons practice with Kalamere today. It had been the perfect morning to run through the woods, the green canopy keeping the air cool even as the sun rose overhead.

The knight reached over and plucked a small leaf from her blue hair, ?Do you plan on seeing him tonight as well??

She shrugged, letting her arms swing down to her sides, ?We don?t have definite plans or anything, but there?s always the chance that we will conveniently run into each other.?

?Yes, very convenient.? He shook his head as she grinned.?Is not tonight that vigil for the two young ladies who recently passed on?? Ishmerai ventured this question a bit more cautiously. A deadly warrior though he was, there were few Fae that were truly comfortable with death.

Queenie. Lila. Jewell?s face went expressionless save for the small frown touching her lips. She had not really known the latter at all, but she had considered Clarice a friend. It really was not her relationship to either that bothered her; the manner of their deaths and their ages though.. There was a brief image in her mind of a young girl, ears rounded with glamour, blue hair done up elaborately on her head. Her body was all skin and bones, her arms cut to shreds over and over again, tears coursing down her face as she cursed the wounds that healed far too quickly to provide the relief she was looking for. ?I am not going to that.?

?No,? Ishmerai gazed at her steadily a moment before returning his gaze to the cobblestone street they walked, ?I did not suppose you would.?

Friday 13 June 2014

Jewell had filled the walk home with empty chatter about this and that, a little half-hearted talk about the new store, while her thoughts were millions of miles and hundreds of years away. Ishmerai didn?t press her to explain what was weighing on her mind, assuming he would get the story in the morning. He was therefore surprised to find her sitting at the kitchen island at three in the morning, an almost empty bottle of fey wine and a glass set before her. He stood there silently, watching her as she traced the patterns in the concrete countertops with her fingertip. He didn?t even realize she knew he was there until she spoke up, ?Do you think I can ever wash my hands clean of the things I have done??

It was a conversation not often repeated between them. ?Surely you have done enough good to have struck a balance.?

?What about washing clean my mind? My conscience??

?I did not realize you had one,? he joked carefully with her, stepping into the room to take a seat caddy corner to her. She looked so miserable when she finally looked up at him; in truth, Jewell really just needed to lift her head enough to empty her current glass of wine. ?What horrible deeds are you to be punished for this evening??

?Every time I close my eyes,? she slid her fingers down her face, forcing her eyes shut, ?I see them.? They blinked open rapidly. ?They?re there in the rings during the festival, fighting each other.. animals. They are holding torches in the moonless night to light our way, enchanted arms held rigidly above them. They are there with their empty eyes, serving drinks at every party, every dinner. Hunted down on steeds, dogs nipping at their heels. Children kept as pets. Adults as lovers.?

The knight?s brow creased as he tried to follow her rambling to its end. ?Are you speaking about humans??

?Yes humans,? she replied impatiently. ?The mortal victims of our world. And who is to stop us from what we do? Hmm??

?Mira, you were never party to those things unless??

?Does it really matter, Ishmerai? Does it? Those who do not attempt to stop the crimes they see are just as guilty.?

Tuesday, 16 July 2014

?You cannot fall apart every time one of your friends is pregnant, has a baby, or you just happen to see a child. It is not practical Mira. Moreover, it is not healthy.?

?I am not falling apart,? she bit out each word, an impressive feat considering the open bottle of Fey Berry Brandy and the empty glass on the counter, not to mention the whiskey she had been tossing back on the Isle earlier.

As she reached out for the bottle, Ishmerai quickly whisked it away. ?I said that was enough.?

?Let me do whatever I want!? She reached for the bottle, knocking over the glass in the process. Still, the knight kept it out of reach and she slumped forward onto the counter, easily defeated. ?I just want.. I don?t want to dream about them tonight. I don?t want to dream at all.?

?You have been so much better, Mira. I thought we were finally moving past this.?

?I know. I know!? She shook her head, burying it in her arm. He had to strain to hear her voice, muffled and so very tired, ?But when it hits me, it hits me so hard that I can hardly breathe.?

Tuesday, 29 July 2014

?Do you think Kalamere finds me annoying but spends time with me anyway so we can have great, guilt-free sex?? Jewell asked her knight, her body language belying the seriousness of her question. She was laying with her back on the seat of the couch and her legs thrown up over the top, bare feet dangling in the air. Her white dress, a bit stiff after some midnight swimming, was tucked tightly beneath her thighs so it didn?t keep flipping up. Blue hair brushed the ground as she tilted her head back to observe Ishmerai upside down.

?What would make you even ask such a question?? Ishmerai questioned, finding it hard to follow her logic as usual. They had been speaking about the possibility of her joining the Panther?s Claw tournament one moment and then this!

?I don?t know.? She shrugged a bit before adjusting her head so all the blood would stop rushing into it and making her dizzy. ?Just something stupid someone said last night.? She had easily brushed aside Charlie?s comment at the time, but it needled at some of her deep-seated insecurities. Even if she did introduce herself with, ?It is a pleasure to have you meet me,? to people on a regular basis, did she actually believe that? The social-savvy Faerie was a nice cover up for a badly damaged woman, plagued with doubt.

Apparently playing the role of her therapist this morning, Ishmerai gave her concerns some thought before asking, ?Would you spend time with someone you could not stand simply to sleep with them??

?Not likely. No one is that good in bed so it wouldn?t be worth it.? The knight simply stared at her as she answered her own question as usual. Jewell sighed, pressing her cheek against the couch cushion. ?Why do I let these people get into my head sometimes??

?That is a better question.?

Wednesday, 13 August 2014

Ishmerai just stared at her as she walked down the hall towards him, having kicked the front door closed behind her, debating on what to comment on first: her odd state of attire in that thin camisole and shorts or the bit of magic wrapped around her right hand, giving it the appearance of healthy, unharmed skin. He opted for the easier course first, ?What happened to your t-shirt??

?It got burned.? Jewell was gritting her teeth at this point, face pale as the pain in her hand had not subsided as the night went on. Of course, why would it? She had done nothing to treat the burns. Now she detoured away from the kitchen and up the stairs, focused on getting to the jar of burn salve the apothecary had made for her by request.

Ishmerai followed her up the stairs and into the bathroom where they kept a steady supply of bandages and a few salves and ointments. ?Is that how your hand got hurt too??

No sense in maintaining the illusion any longer, Jewell let it drop to reveal signed, blistered, and angry red skin. She fumbled left-handed for the correct jar in the cabinet. ?Something like that.?

?Stop.? With his hand on her shoulder, he directed her away from the cabinet and to a seat on the edge of the bathtub. He easily retrieved the correct salve and opened it before handing it off to her.

?Thanks,? she murmured, balancing the jar on her knees before slathering it on her palm and fingers. A little happy sigh escaped her lips at the quick relief she experienced from the terrible heat that radiated from the injury.

He watched as she carefully flexed her fingers and twisted her hand this way and that, once more observing the damage done by her interaction with Charlie Nine. ?Mira.. are you looking for trouble again??

?Did I ever stop?? she asked somewhat distractedly, wiggling her fingers in front of her face. When she determined there would be no lasting damage, she looked up to give him a grin written with trouble.

Friday, 29 August 2014

Did she know what to do with a whole studio? Hell, no. So that was why, in the middle of a barren floor, she sat with her legs curled under her with a blood red, unplugged Fender in her lap.

Ishmerai ascended the steep staircase, taking a deep breath. He had left one difficult woman behind him, stubbornly quiet as she licked her wounds, and was about to approach another. He gave a brief yet firm knock to the door, "M'lady," he dared to address her still, "I would like to speak with you."

Thanks, Ish, you're a true pal. "Back up a few steps, turn around, fricken try again without makin' me sound old." Long thumbnail plucks at each string.

The poor man couldn't win. "Lain," he tried again, although using her given name seemed to smack of disrespect, "please allow me to enter. I believe we really must speak."

It did in his circles. But to her, it's acceptable. The 'please' part's cute too. "S'better. Get on in here, bro. Should'a brought a chair with ya."

Opening the door to enter, he briefly considered lecturing the Trueblood on the importance of locks but quickly dismisses the idea and simply closes it behind him. "I will remember that for next time, thank you." But he wished he had thought of a chair because there is a moment of hesitation as he takes in the bare room of what he should do: stand awkwardly or sit on the floor facing her? He opted for the latter. "The place looks.. lovely." At least he had a sense of humor.

"Course it does," says to the guitar. "It's got its essentials. Four walls an' a floor, couple'a jacks an' outlets." Another chord strummed. "So, what'cha want? Playin' mediator? Ain't too often ya wanna speak to ME."

"I do not believe I am qualified to be a mediator with my rather.. particular skill set." There was one of those rare smiles that usually only Jewell could provoke, but only when she was not being a pain. "I believe I am here to say, and I quote, 'Get the hell out,' but I thought perhaps we could discuss what perhaps caused my lady's change in opinion towards you once more?"

She must have heard it in his voice because she looked up, but her expression says she doesn't get it. "Ya keep problems from gettin' outta hand, don't ya? Mediator." Another strum. His question is what makes her smile, with a wolfish spread and an upnod. "Ahaaa, she that ticked?"

"If you would like to call that mediation.. then yes. I am here to mediate." The smile had yet to die when she looked up, and brightened for just a moment before it was replaced with something akin to disappointment at her own. "I think ticked would be an understatement."

"Please," rolls of silver eyes. "You ain't really pissed unless yer blowin' crap up, schway? She ain't been doin' that yet. I'd'a heard." Ducks her silver head out from the guitar strap. A fluid gesture of one thin hand has the instrument rising off her lap, turning in the air, and moving to rest upon the only piece of furniture the room had: a guitar stand. "Ya've known her longer than me, what do you think's tha only thing could get her this mad?"

Ishmerai checked himself, not divulging what Jewell considered a rather embarrassing secret: she couldn't blow up anything. Such displays of power were truly beyond her now, leaving her with a broken hand thrown against the solid wood of a bar as her main release of anger. "There are several things that can make her very angry but few that can make her so hurt." He emphasized that last word to clarify.

Lain had dead eyes. They'd long since lost their Trueblood sheen and not even a body reconstructed to perfection could bring it back. But a searchlight flickers through them, like she hadn't considered it possible to HURT Jewell. Piss her off, sure. But hurt? "Ain't like nothin' she ain't done ta me first, schway?" Getting up, she swats the seat of her pants, black and baggy with elastic at the waist and the word BANANA in block letters down her left leg.

Acting the part of a disappointed mentor, he frowned at Lain even as she stood. "A rather childish defense. I did not mean that you hurt her physically. This is something she needs no help in accomplishing on her own." Done with the lecture and following her in standing, he pressed the point of his visit: "What did you say to her, Lain?"

The Fae did cast a shadow, but she crosses her arms and stares up into his scale-bordered face like they were eye level. "I ain't stupid, Ish. I know what I did. I asked 'bout tha kids. At first," tilts her head. A waterfall of chrome trinkets dangled from the only sharp point of her ears. "Then I kinda pushed her 'bout'm."

He had opened his mouth to challenge her on that; clearly Lain had done more than merely ask, but when she admitted it herself, he only had one question, "Why?"

"Cuz no one else is. YOU ain't, none'a her "friends," air quotes were applicable, "are. She can pretend she's all over it an' crap, and doin' all she can an' movin' on'r whatever, but you spit tha word KID 'round her and you watch how easy it is ta kill her.

"Yanno she likes ta prattle on 'bout how many enemies she made 'cross the Way?" Chin jerks over his shoulder like a Way to the Nevernever had just opened. "She's too easy ta take out, Ish. You know that."

"Have I not?" He seemed more amused than annoyed at her assumptions. If only he had the time to tell Lain the journeys he and Jewell had been on together to save those children he had never even met. Perhaps would never meet. "Perhaps not as easy as you may think, Lain. I pity the person who comes after Jewell truly looking for trouble."

"Why, so she can talk'm ta death an' flip her hair? Politics ain't matter here, bro? Fricken shoot'r with an iron bullet straight up in tha head," slices a hand across her throat. "She's done.

"You know her better'n me, Ish. And maybe that's part'a tha problem, schway? I ain't been where she is, an' I ain't done what she's done. But I ain't no innocent lil' Elf from 'cross tha Border." Juts out her chin. "She's stronger'n this, Ish. Someone's gotta make her believe that."

Ishmerai laughed. He liked Lain. Which was why he had been willing to come and speak with her. He also thought the hard-ass thing was a bit of an act, which just made him like her more. "Would it relieve your concern for Jewell a bit to know that all this," he gestured around at the studio to indicate the neighborhood it was a part of, "is really just something for her to play at while she works on something much larger?"

"No. Cuz I told you I ain't stupid. There's a lotta hours in the day, schway? I know what it's for." Blows out a sigh that rounds her lean cheeks. "Look. Maybe it's just me hangin' onto a memory. Maybe I ain't ever really know her. Maybe she an' I are just WAY fricken different in how we handle crap. But it ticks me off ta see'r busted so easily. I ain't ever been able ta bust her before. She always got ta me worse.

"She's gonna get herself screwed over if she don't get a handle on it. Cuz as much as she ditches you? Tch." Smirk.

"All right." He nodded, the pieces from last night coming together a little and her last comment earning another smile. The question really was how far off was Ishmerai from Jewell at any given time? "She is more fragile than before.. but only in some ways. The children will always be her weakest point, Lain because no matter what she has tried, what she has attempted.. what she has given up, and she has given up more than you know, they have remained beyond her grasp. So she has failed them. And she has failed Alex. And you. And Brian. And Stephen Kidd."

A few white locks of hair moved without the benefit of her hand. "I could slap'r fer includin' me in that list. Alex.. tch," that seems to be all she's willing to say about that. "Brian's a joke. And Stephen's worth less. I guess that's part of it too."

Ishmerai neither argued nor disagreed. "She only came back here because she had no choice. Otherwise? She would not have bothered, not without them." He fell silent a moment before thinking to mention, "You do realize that her current state of.. weakness is because of the the kids? A punishment for killing those involved in taking them. Anyone who planned it, knew about it, participated in it. She went after all of them as soon as she could."

She wasn't surprised. She'd never had kids, but she'd had dogs once. And she had brothers that he could remember. Real ones. "See? You know she's got it in her ta be stronger'n this. I know it too. I've seen it, you've seen it." Throws up her hands. "All I want really..? An' it ain't even for me. Is fer her to remember that. If'n she's gotta bust, don't do it out there."

"It is not all weakness. It is part trap as well. What better way to draw your enemies in than to appear wounded? Perhaps it is not always intentionally so, but we are using it. And it is working."

Another scoff, another roll of her eyes. That was as much concession that he was going to get out of her. "Good thing all her enemies so far've been wusses." Turns to face the Fae. "I ain't need ta stay here, Ish. But I expect ya ta gimme a hand with all this stuff," waves her arm at the empty room.

"Who said you were going anywhere?" He tilted his head, confused.

"Uh.. Yer terrible impression 'bout a half hour ago? 'Fore ya say anything? I'm doin' her a favor by considerin' it, schway? I could totally make her like SO much worse."

"As far as I am concerned, you will not be going anywhere unless you so desire. But," his tone was one that brooked no argument, "you will not be.. pushing, I believe you said, her on this topic again."

She turns on her heel, slow, as slow as silver brows rise. Disbelief shaves off all hostility. "Worry 'bout yer ACTUAL charge, schway?"

"I am only worried that in focusing on Jewell's weakness, you have forgotten that I do not share them." He liked Lain, but that could only go so far. His devotion to Jewell was absolute.

"Ya've been doin' lots of assumption 'bout me, yanno that? I ain't got a bone ta pick with you. An' I ain't wantin' ta get in a pissing match." Arms unfold for slender hands to clasp her hips instead. "You want somethin' outta me, you ask." Which was really unfair considering she'd ordered him around before, but the tone of their discussion had shifted. He was no longer playing around, and neither was she.

"I have made assumptions about you? No no, dear lady." He shook his head slowly. "I am simply asking, a consideration few people ever receive, that you do not push my lady as you have done. It is highly upsetting to her and therefore highly unpleasant for me." There was no doubting in such moments how many years Ishmerai had spent in the courts of Faerie. "My job is to keep her from all threats, not just the physical ones. I would appreciate it if you would simply remember that as I would like to continue working with you in the future."

'Dear lady' trips down her spine like a mantis's bladed hands. She'd never been good at hiding her feelings. This time, disgust. But he keeps talking and it evens out. To consideration and finally into a half curved grin. "S'all ya had ta say, schway?"

He bowed his head to her, "I will remember to be more concise during our future dealings if possible."

"Eh. Yer a Faerie. Ya like words." Hand flap. "One thing'll make workin' with me REAL easy, though's not tellin' me what I will'r won't be doin'." Sticks out the same hand for him to shake. "Ta seal tha deal, schway?"

Not overly comfortable with the hand-shaking stuff, he did his best to not shake hers awkwardly. "It was my great pleasure to converse with you this afternoon, Lain." The knight could be taught! No more "lady" for the Trueblood.

Next step, call her Schway. Brilliant smile gifted up to Ish. Her handshake is firm and solid enough for the both of them. Somehow. With white fingers thin and long as twigs and evenly shaped fingernails, it's a wonder she had any strength at all. "Back at'cha."

Saturday, 25 October 2014

Ishmerai held the door open for his lady as her arms were full. ?I thought you were going to the Outback,? he commented, clearly confused.

?Uhuh. That?s what I did.? Jewell carelessly set down the ant farm on the vestibule table, cradling the grey kitten in her arms. Oddly enough, it seemed content with this.

?And you came back with a...?

She mistook his confusion, thinking he did not know how to identify the animal in her arms. The Empress held the kitten out carefully to him, ?It?s a kitten. Her name is Cupcake and she is mine now.?

?Right.?

Jewell cuddled the animal to her chest, stroking its fuzzy little nose with her fingertip. ?I asked for the Catbug but someone brought me this instead. Maybe they got confused. What do you think, Cupcake? Hmm? Did someone get confused?? When she spoke to the kitten, her voice took on that high-pitched tone usually reserved for babies.

?Mother of Nature...?

Jewell ignored him. ?Don?t mind Ishmerai. He?s just wearing his grumpy pants. Yes he is! Yes he is!?

The knight covered his eyes with his hand for a moment before pointing to the up-to-now unmentioned ant farm. ?And what is that contraption??

?Oh that?? She looked to the ant farm as well. ?I have no flippin? clue.?

Monday, 27 October 2014

?Bam!? Jewell hit the air with her fist as she exited the team entrance of the Iron Fists Garden, grinning. There was an undeniable bounce in her steps (in those heels!) as she approached Ishmerai. ?Did you see her!??

The knight smiled faintly, ?Yes. I did mingle amidst the crowd to watch the match. Mrs. Ravenlock did very well for her debut fight.?

?Je-nai, ?she emphasized her sister-in-law?s name with a look at Ishmerai which just screamed, ?Why must you sound so stuffy and boring?? ?did AMAZING!? Then it was time for some reenactments, ?She was all POW! and BAM!? Jewell sent another fist into the air and a kick too for good measure.

?Yes yes. It was quite impressive,? Ishmerai remarked without any of his lady?s enthusiasm.

?Do you know what this means, Merai?? she gave his chest a friendly shove with the question. ?We may even stand a chance this season! I mean.. I don?t know about winning the whole thing, but we might not lose miserably!?

As dreams of grandeur quickly clouded the Faerie?s eyes, he felt the need to bring her back down to RhyDin. ?Of course, that means you will have to win tomorrow night too.?

?Oh..? her expression fell a little. ?Right.?

He continued, ?And need I remind you that your performance as of late has not exactly been stellar, I believe the word is.?

Now she pouted, ?No. You didn?t need to remind me.? Jewell dug the toe of her right high heel into the dirt a moment, ?Why do you have to be such a killjoy??

Thursday, 6 November 2014

?Ishmerai!? she greeted him in a sing-song voice when he returned home and took a lean against the doorframe, watching as his lady dance her way around the kitchen. It made him smile faintly, the way she moved around light-of-foot with a sweet and happy tune on her lips. There were never afternoons like this in Faerie. Beyond the veil, there had only been brooding frowns and calculating smiles. In RhyDin, he watched her transform into enchanting rays of sunshine and little bits of magic that worked their way into people?s lives.

The knight?s contemplation was disrupted when Jewell spun about, tossing an empty jar of a newly discovered favorite food, chocolate hazelnut spread (?Mother of Nature, Meria! This is almost better than sex,? she had exclaimed when she first tried it), into the garbage. As she spun back to the collection of fruit she was nibbling on, her hair fanned out behind her for just a moment before falling back around her face. And suddenly Ishmerai was next to her, taking her by surprise as he roughly grabbed at that purple curtain of hair--so different from Kal?s gentle touch last night that had sent a little thrill down her spine--and pulled it away from her neck.

?What are you doing!?? She cried, trying to smack him away with a hand that she was only moments ago licking clean of any lingering chocolate.

The knight was furious, ?Did Lord Ar?Din do that to you??

?Of course not!? She touched her neck self-consciously, trying to further hide the mark that Crispin had left on her throat. ?Tara and I were just playing a stupid game.. it was my fault.? The words sounded a bit hollow, repeated a thousand times on a world a million miles away in another lifetime.

It seemed to only make him angrier. He knew her history, knew the twisted way her mind worked. He also knew that a woman, especially the tiny terror Tara, had not left that mark on her neck. He jabbed his finger in the air, pointing at the hidden, undeniably hand-shaped bruise marring the creamy white skin of her throat. ?If Kalamere did that??

?He didn?t,? she insisted with her own mix of defensive venom.

?Who then??

She just shrugged, sullen. The second half of her night had been so much fun, it had been easy to forget the foiled game she and Tara had been playing. It was not so fun to remember now. ?I told you it was just a game. I lost.?

?I..? Ishmerai grasped for words that would not come. ?I cannot deal with you when you are like this.? And far from the first time in their relationship, Ishmerai stormed out of the room.

Sunday, 9 November 2014

?But no one mentioned having seen it??

She shrugged, ?Maybe they were too afraid I would punch them in the face.?

Ishmerai smiled just a touch, ?Would you have done that??

Unhesitatingly: ?Yes.?

The knight just shook his head. Punching someone in the face over a tabloid article seemed silly, but the whims of Faeries often seemed to be that way. ?Do you plan on going over to The Line today?? He knew she sometimes liked to stop by the betting house on a Sunday afternoon and see what sporting events were taking place, maybe place a bet or two. At least that was what she claimed to be doing.

?No.? Jewell stirred the yogurt she was not eating in a circle with her spoon, watching the fresh raspberries she had thrown into the bowl bleed red.

He watched her a moment before venturing his suggestion, ?I thought perhaps you would like to speak with Lord Ar?Din before he sees the article..?

?I couuulllld,? she drew out the word as she stirred the yogurt the other way, ?but no.?

?Mira?? he began.

She cut him off, ?I don?t want to talk about it.?

Sunday, 16 November 2014

?What if you end up matched against Kalamere??

She shrugged, ?Then I will fight Kal. Not like we haven?t fought before.? Of course, he hadn?t actually hit her at the time.

Ishmerai looked at her bruised face carefully, wondering if she had really thought through the implications of this. The knight approached his next point as delicately as he knew how, ?I am just concerned how you will react when someone you care about hits you.?

?Wouldn?t be the first time.? Jewell?s tone had flatlined. ?Besides, it?s different in the ring.?

?You hope it is.?

He didn?t say a word when she left herself off the schedule for Royal Pain vs. Hydra during week four of IFL.

Thursday, 16 July 2015

?And then the guest bedroom can go here,? Jewell traced a finger along the blueprints laid out on the kitchen island.

Ishmerai nodded, resigned to his lady?s ideas of moving and expanding her business ventures once again. ?What about??

They both froze, turning their heads sharply towards the front of the house. There was nothing to hear. No Sapphire tromping in bearing lunch for the three of them from what she called, ?The most delicious food truck ever imagined.? No neighbors knocking, petitioning to see The Empress. There was nothing to see either. Even their sharp eyes could not penetrate kitchen cabinets and walls.

But they could certainly feel something.

?That was.. very powerful.?

?It was,? Jewell agreed with the knight?s understatement, turning to look at him. Her brow was furrowed deeply. ?Do you think we should go check it out??

He frowned. ?Sounds like meddling in business that is of no concern to you.?

The Faerie pointed towards the front door, which just happened to be facing north. ?That much power is certainly a concern to me.?

Saturday, 15 August 2015

Jewell slowed to a walk, her hands resting on top of her head as she tried to cool down. It was her fault they were out running so late in the day, but the afternoon heat was murder! The little stream of sweat trickling down the back of her neck actually made her long for the upcoming, snowy excursion.

Ishmerai matched her pace, looking too cool and comfortable to Jewell?s eye. ?So you actually let him hit you??

She rolled her eyes a bit as he revisited their earlier conversation, which she had smartly cut off feigning breathlessness from the running. She continued down the road, only pausing when she found a bit of shade. ?Not like I just let him hit me. I was trying to win you know.? He gave her a look that prompted her to add, ?But yes, he did hit me and no, I didn?t have some kind of instant meltdown. It wasn?t upsetting at all, actually.? She sounded both slightly surprised and a little impressed with herself.

?Why do you think that is??

Her shoulders rose and fell quickly in a shrug. ?I don?t know. Maybe it just makes a difference how the person is acting? He wasn?t screaming belligerently at me or making me feel like shit about myself, so I guess that helps.?

Sunday, 16 August 2015

?Come oooooon!? Sapphire dragged out the word. ?Just tell me already!?

?No!? Jewell wrapped her arms around the stuffed moose and buried her head against it. Her whole body hurt from the Warlord Tournament, and she was still nursing a hangover from the partying that had stretched too far into this morning.

?Jew-ell!? The teen was relentless. ?Pretty please??

?Ugggh! Fine.? Jewell repeated the dirty limerick that Harris had sent her via singing telegram to Sapphire?s delighted laughter.

?Wait wait,? she put the spoon down, turning her back on the celebration dinner she was preparing for a moment. ?So he sings, you punch him in the face, grab the moose, and then slam the door in his face??

Jewell was starting to smile a little now, Sapphire?s enthusiasm being contagious. ?Something like that.?

Sunday, 14 February 2016

?He has been letting you live with him all this time??

She shrugged. ?Yeah.?

?Brave man.? Lord Ar?Din had suddenly risen greatly in the knight?s estimation. Living with The Empress for an extended period of time was challenging at best. His lady?s scowl prompted him to offer a smile to lighten the blow. ?No offense meant, Mira. Truly. I am sure you were an absolutely delightful guest. He must have been overjoyed to have you there.?

The gesture and words did little to pacify her as she slouched in her seat. ?Well.. whatever. It probably doesn?t matter anyway. Pretty sure I fucked that all up too.?

?What do you mean??

?I kissed Sinjin Fai the other night.?

Ishmerai sighed. ?And why did you do that??

Jewell tilted her head back and closed her eyes. The sun was warm in I?Yulna as it filtered through the trees. ?Because I?m stupid and I damn myself every time.?

Thursday, 18 February 2016

?Mira, it is well past midnight. Can you not at least try to sleep??

?I?d rather not.?

?Perhaps if we just turn off some of the--?

?No!?

?Okay okay. What about sitting down??

?I don?t feel like it.?

?So you are just going to keep pacing??

?Maybe. Maybe I?ll go take another shower.?

He sighed. ?All right.?

Monday, 22 February 2016

?Look,? she spun about for the knight in her pretty yellow dress. ?I?m healing so much faster again. Like I used to. See.? She moved closer to him and practically shoved her forearm in his face.

The bruises from where she had been restrained were indeed fading away. So too were the iron ?burns? that covered the entire back of her body.

He laughed. ?Yes, yes. Your wounds are healing nicely.? She smiled, pleased by the acknowledgement. ?But you know, I worry more about the wounds in here,? he reached out and tapped her forehead lightly.

The priest?s clammy fingers pressed into her face and the cloying, musty smell of his hand threatened to choke her as she tried to take deep, steadying breaths through her nose.

?Don?t!? Jewell shoved him away from her, practically tripping over her own feet as she stepped back.

?Mira?? Instinctively, he reached for her again.

She twisted away from him, her arms wrapped protectively around herself. ?I?m fine! Just.. I have to get ready for lunch now.?

Thursday, 10 March 2016

?Madness seedings!? Sapphire practically shoved the newspaper into her face.

?Stop stop, I can?t read it that way!?

The teen flattened it on the table for her instead, smoothing out the wrinkles it had inherited as she waved it around. Impatient and bursting with pride, she pointed right to the top of Monk division for Jewell.

?You?re shitting me, right??

?Language,? Sapphire chided, laughing.

Jewell grabbed the paper right from her and held it up real close. ?Unbelievable.?

Sapphire shrugged as she took a seat at the table, ?Not really.?

?Where are you on here?? Grey eyes cast about for the teen?s name.

?Ramirez Division, number thirteen.? She smirked. ?I guess they don?t recognize greatness when they see it.?

She looked over the edge of the paper at her. ?Then how do you explain my number one seed??

?Duh.? She rolled her eyes. ?You?re sleeping with a division leader.?

?Good point.? Jewell went back to locating Sapphire?s name and her round one opponent. ?Oh.. Rakeesh huh??

?Isn?t he a Lion Turtle or something??

A furrow formed in Jewell?s forehead. ?What the hell is a Lion Turtle??

?Language!?

Sunday, 20 March 2016

?Mira, you have been practicing all day.?

?Mmhm.?

?Perhaps you should rest a bit??

?Nope.?

?Your match is in three hours. You need to get cleaned up.? No response. ?Sapphire made dinner. She wanted me to come get you.?

?I?ll eat later.? Jewell spun her new scepter about in her hand before swinging it with enough force that she almost dislodged the practice dummy?s head from its body.

?She made your favorite.?

?Later. I?ll eat later.?

Friday, 25 March 2016--3:00am

?I ate too many pancakes,? she whined. ?I think I?m gonna barf.?

?For the record, I warned you that you were going to feel ill.?

?Nah, it?s probably because Uncle Matt backhanded her twenty times.?

?I think it was only four,? the knight corrected.

Sapphire shrugged. ?Close enough.?

Jewell groaned. ?Which one of you is gonna hold my hair back??

?Not it!? Sapphire shouted.

Ishmerai frowned. The teen grinned in response. The knight had not gotten the hang of that game yet.

Saturday, 29 April 2016

?I need you to stay in the house tomorrow night.?

?What!? I have to stay in the house while you get to go to Beltane and do Mother knows what with god knows who??

?Just stay in the house.?

?This is epically unfair!? Sapphire threw the dish towel on the counter. ?Beltane is the coolest night of the year. There?s even going to be a party right in Little Elfhame!?

?I know. And you can go out later in the week to enjoy whatever it is you want.? Jewell paused. ?Just not tomorrow night.?

?What the hell am I supposed to do instead??

?You can have friends over here. Have a fire in the pit on the patio. Drink. Eat. Play your guitar. I honestly don?t care as long as you do it here.?

?And Merai will be here to watch me, I suppose??

?Yes.?

Sapphire groaned. ?You are so unfair.?

?I know.?

Monday, 9 May 2016

?Why didn?t you want to accept the squireship with Baroness Ellisa? She?s nice.?

She shrugged. ?I?m already training with you every morning. I didn?t want to add anything else to it.?

?But we do magic.?

Sapphire wrinkled her nose. ?Yeah. But sword fighting isn?t my strong suit anyway.?

Jewell smirked. ?Well duh. That would be the point of being a squire then, no??

?I guess. But Fists is the only sport worthy of my real attention.?

?You sound so much like Harris. It?s creepy.?

Wednesday, 27 July 2016

?Where did you go to lunch?? he asked The Empress as she took a spot on the couch opposite him, red high heels discarded on the floor so she could curl her legs beneath her.

Her smile turned sly, eyes downcast as she smoothed her dress over her legs. ?We stayed in.?

?Of course you did. I am guessing he did not take it too badly then.?

?Oh no.? She laughed. ?He seemed pretty upset.?

The knight shook his head. ?Do I even want to know how you won him over??

She tilted her head. The red lipstick she had applied prior to leaving for The Line was long gone; her blonde hair was decidedly more tousled; her dress was a bit rumpled but at least all the buttons were done now; and her face was still a little flushed. ?Probably not.? She admitted with a smirk. ?It took him a few minutes but he uh.. eventually came around.?

Thursday, 28 July 2016

?Mira, please tell me you did not sleep with that thing in your bed.?

Her yawn turned into laughter as she set her Kal Cardboard Cutout next to the kitchen table before plopping down onto a seat herself. ?No. It would have been too poor of a replacement for the real deal.? He rolled his eyes and she grinned. ?But I woke up and it was kind of staring at me, so I figured I?d bring it out here instead.?

?So it could stare at me.?

?Exactly.?

?Of course.? The long suffering knight sighed. ?It does not even look much like Lord Ar?Din, you know.?

?Of course it doesn?t.? She pulled over the plate of pastries he had in front of himself. The baker sent over a fresh box almost every day.

?You did it on purpose?? He asked with a smile. His lady could be so jealous.

The look she levelled at him was cold and full of steel, a difficult feat as she chewed a mouthful of danish. Just like a high-class lady, she brushed the crumbs off her lips with the back of her hand. ?Ishmerai, don?t be a fool. Would I really let someone make a true to life artistic representation of anyone I cared about??

He knew she had chosen her words carefully there and that this had nothing to do with someone having a likeness of her beau to call their own. ?No. I suppose not.?

Friday, 2 September 2016

It was always something, watching his lady sit in her finery, lips still stained red but high heels long abandoned, covered in bruises, and eating a bowl of loopy fruits cereal. He didn?t even know how she ate that garbage, but since no one was around to make breakfast, the faerie took what she could get.

Ishmerai contented himself with coffee. They didn?t have coffee in Faerie, and he had taken a liking to it here.

?Do you think that just because you declared yourself loyal, this.. Six will come to your defense on Thursday against Lady Rhiannon??

?Uhuh,? she said through a mouthful of the sugary cereal, wiping the milk off her lips with the back of her left hand. Such manners! ?Because if he doesn?t? He?ll have an angry renegade baron on his hands, and I?ll challenge immediately following Claire.?

?I thought you said that you do not trust this young man.?

Jewell shrugged, spooning up another bunch of colorful loops. ?I don?t. He smells like Faerie and winter. But that doesn?t mean I can?t work with him when it suits my needs.?

Monday, 31 October 2016

?Look, look!? Jewell tugged on Ishmerai?s arm. ?There?s another one!?

He laughed at her exuberance, shaking his head. ?I thought you said it was creepy seeing all these little girls running around with blue hair.?

?Well?? she strung out the word reluctantly, ?it kind of is. But it?s also kind of cool? I mean, they?re dressing up like me. They even have little scepters!? She shook her head, grey eyes wide and shining. ?I?m like a hero to them. An idol! They want to be grow up to be just like me.?

The knight sighed. There would be no living with her after this.

Friday, 25 November 2016

First, there was fury.

?Can you believe that guy? I mean really?? Jewell paced in a circle on the streets of Dragon?s Gate, gesturing wildly as she worked out her anger. ?To even think that the death of a stranger can come close to what I lost.?

?Everyone grieves differently, Mira.?

She ignored the sound voice of reason leaning against the bench and watching her carefully. ?Because it?s not the same. It?s just not. It?s not even close. What I lost--? her voice trembled and it was another moment before she could continue her rant. ?I lost so much. I lost everything. But you don?t see me going around acting like a complete asshole to everyone, do you? I never proudly admitted to being a total dick and then proceed to say that I didn?t even care that I was. I didn?t take my hurt and my anger out on anyone.?

?Except yourself,? Ishmerai interrupted again.

And Jewell ignored him again. ?This is unbelievable. I mean, did you hear him? The audacity of that guy! To act like he was always there for me. That he?s helped me in any way. I mean, where was he when Faerie burned down my life, huh? Where was he when they stole my kids? Where was he when they laughed about it? Tell me that, Ishmerai! Where was he then? Huh? Where was he when they stole my magic from me or when I got it back? He wasn?t there, was he? Or when Sapphire was hurt this summer? Or when Lirssa was gone? Or when they killed Theo right outside my door. And he?s certainly not going to be there when the Temple comes back for me. For all of us. No, he sure as hell won?t because he?ll be too busy licking his wounded pride. But he was there for me, right?? She snorted derisively. ?What a ****** delusional liar.?

Later, after she had abused a punching bag until it begged for mercy and drank enough to drown a normal person of her stature, her fury ebbed and was overcome by sorrow.

?Selfish. That?s what I am. Always selfish. All I ever care about is myself. And he said--? She stopped, unable to repeat the part that had really hurt.

You don't want those who want you; that might mean losing someone that cares and you just can't take that again can you?

Kruger had been explicitly clear. The only person she wanted was Kalamere, but he was the one person who didn?t want her. The one person that didn?t care.

Jewell just couldn?t let herself go there. She didn?t want to explore the nuances of her relationship and feelings for Kal. She didn?t want to think about why the fact that he didn?t love her made her feel safe and why it gave her comfort. She didn?t want to think about what she was hiding from or protecting herself from by staying with him.

Instead, she asked Ishmerai in her smallest, most pathetic voice, ?Am I really a selfish whore??

The knight sighed, running his hand over her hair again. ?No. You are one of the most selfless people I have ever met, Mira.?

She sniffed, roughly brushing away her tears with the back of her hand. ?That?s laying it on a bit thick, don?t you think?? She knew he meant it though. Ishmerai couldn?t lie. Not to her. Not to anyone. It was just a defensive statement. It was too hard to accept the compliment when what she really believed was everything Kruger had said to her. He had cruelly verbalized many of her own thoughts, and he had echoed the words of the first man she had ever loved.

No wonder Jewell didn?t want the men that wanted her. They hurt her the worst.

?I never said you were not selfish. You can be a selfish little princess quite often--?

?That?s more like it.? She nodded her approval. That was more in line with what she believed about herself.

He continued as if she had not interrupted him, ?But those moments do not define you, Mira. They are simply a part of you. You are? you are so much more than those moments.?

Saturday, 31 December 2016

?Your cheeks are flushed.?

?It was warm in the Annex,? she shot back defensively.

Surprised at her vehemence, his eyebrows shot up. ?Ooookay.?

?You?re insufferable.?

?At times,? he agreed. The knight waited as they traversed a block in silence before trying again, ?So who was it that got you all... heated??

She turned on him in anger. ?You know, maybe you should be concerned instead of teasing me? For all you know, I was attacked by someone and here you are making jokes!?

He frowned. ?Were you?? She visibly hesitated, and the knight pressed the issue, his tone now quiet and serious: ?Mira, did someone attack you??

?Yes!? she shot off impatiently, annoyed.

?Tonight??

She crossed her arms over her chest, half-turning from him. ?Kind of. Not really. He didn?t attack me. He just sort of? cornered me a little.?

?Who??

?It was? well, it was Aki. My squire. But he didn?t attack me,? she darted a glance at her knight before glancing away again. ?He just took me by surprise is all. He?s usually so mild mannered and not very aggressive. So it was just? he took me by surprise,? she finished lamely.

?So if he did not attack you, my lady, what did Aki actually do??

Her cheeks turned red and she was suddenly fascinated by her shoes. ?He kissed me.?

?Did he do so against your wishes??

?Maybe.? She dug her toe into the cobblestone street. ?Yes. No. I don?t know.? She sighed. ?It?s not really a big deal. It was just? you know how I?ve been about people touching me since last year.?

?I know.?

?I really don?t mind. But when someone takes me by surprise? It just makes me nervous.? It was a byproduct of her time in the Temple of the Divine Mother unfortunately. ?But it wasn?t bad. It was actually kind of nice.?

?Did you punch him??

She finally looked up at him again, grinning a little, ?No.?

The knight stepped closer, wrapping his arm around her shoulders. ?Maybe you should have.?

?Probably. I?ll try to remember that for next time. But if I start punching everyone who tries to kiss me, who is going to risk it??

Ishmerai laughed, ?Fewer people, I imagine. That is kind of the point, Mira.?

?That sounds terrible!? Jewell sighed dramatically, ?A life without kisses is hardly a life at all.?

Monday, 16 January 2017

?Why must you bring that creature along??

?Leave poor Jax-y alone!? She shot the knight a warning glance before turning a bright smile down on the fluffball that was dashing around her feet as they walked through the park. It was January, but the sun was shining and the wind had stilled long enough to allow them to enjoy the fresh air. ?Isn?t that right, Jax-y? You tell that mean ol? Ishmerai that he isn?t very nice.?

Jax listened, dashing at Ishmerai and nipping at his shin.

?Gah! Get it away!?

Jewell laughed. ?He?s just playing with you!?

?He is trying to eat me.?

?Jax-y, leave the big baby knight alone. You frighten him.? Jax looked up at her, his tongue hanging out and drool dripping onto the dirt path. His teeth were razor sharp.

?Unbelievable.? The knight shook his head. ?I would like to get a coffee,? he nodded towards the cart further down the path. ?Are you coming??

?Nah, Jax and I will stay here. It?s warm in the sun.? She turned her face upwards to soak it up, her eyes fluttering closed.

?All right. Try not to let your? pet eat anyone.?

The knight wandered off and Jewell spun around in a lazy circle, eyes still closed, and Jax attacked a pile of soggy leaves. Her first indication that something was wrong was a low growl from the uni-fluff. She opened her eyes and spun about. There was a man standing there. He was ragged and care worn. He had an iron knife in his hand.

His ears were round.

?Lovely day, isn?t it??

The man didn?t respond. Instead, he lunged at her. The Empress Overlady was ready to step aside, but the man didn?t get close. Instead, he stumbled back with a scream. There was a uni-fluff attached to his leg! Blood was staining his filthy pants, and no matter how much he shook his leg, Jax wouldn?t let go.

?Get it off! Get it off!?

Jewell reached out, disarming the man with a chop to his wrist as he flailed about. Then Ishmerai was there, disabling him with a few chi-point attacks. The man fell to the ground. Jax backed up a step and snapped his teeth at him again. The attacker cringed back in fear.

The knight reached down, picking up the uni-fluff and patting him on the head. ?Good Jax-y.?

Jax bit his hand.

Saturday, 4 March 2017

?Madness seedings!? Sapphire chimed just as enthusiastically as she did last year when she slapped the newspaper on Jewell?s lap before flopping next to her on the couch. When the faerie just stared at the paper, uninterested and uncaring, Sapphire lifted it up and practically shoved it in her face, grinning, ?Look! You?re a number one seed again.?

Jewell tried to knock the paper aside. ?Big surprise. I am the Overlord still, you know. Dying for a few minutes didn?t change that.?

The teen smirked, ?You sure it?s not because you?re sleeping with your division manager this year??

She gave her a pained look, ?Sapphire...?

?But it?s Anubis!? She pointed to his name on the paper. ?I thought maybe you and Auntie had an arrangement or maybe--? she sputtered when Jewell tore the newspaper from her hands and hit her in the face with it.

?I?m not sleeping with that division manager or any division manager. Period.?

?I was just teasing,? Sapphire sighed, setting the paper aside.

?It?s not funny.?

?Fine.? She waited a few seconds before asking more quietly, ?Are you still going to place your bets this year??

Jewell looked aside, suddenly interested in a loose thread on the blanket she was cocooned in. ?Probably not.?

Sapphire scooted over, leaning against her and nuzzling Jewell?s shoulder with her cheek before resting it there. ?You fill out your brackets and I?ll bring them over to The Line for you, okay??

She pressed her cheek to the top of Sapphire?s head, ?Yeah. Okay.?

Friday, 9 March 2017

?No, you are not dragging me to all of these events.?

?But??

Jewell looked so sad and lost that Sapphire almost changed her mind. Then she shook her head, ?No. No way. You are not conning me with the teary eyes. Not again.?

The faerie scowled and huffed. ?Fine. Whatever. I?ll just go myself. Or not go at all. Who cares anyway??

?Why can?t you just take Ishmerai??

?I am not going!? the knight called from the other room.

Both women glared down the hall before Sapphire looked back at Jewell. ?Fine. Not Ishmerai. What about Auntie Eless??

Jewell looked away, ?I don?t think an empath wants to be around me right now.?

?Oh yeah. Good point. Hrrm,? she leaned back on the couch, curling her toes into the rug and then uncurling them. ?Don?t you have any other fashion-y friends??

?I guess Val might want to go to some events?? she didn?t sound so sure. ?Maybe Lucy??

?Who?s Lucy??

?Pretty redhead? We saw her at the spa that time. She had the ghost with her.?

Sapphire sat up, ?Oh yeah! What ever happened to him? He was good looking.?

She shook her head, ?I don?t know. We?ve gone to lunch together and shopping, but I haven?t seen him again.?

?You should totally ask her to go with you. Maybe you guys can swap tragic love stories while checking out this year?s new looks.?

?Sounds fabulous.?

Sunday, 18 June 2017

?So that?s it then??

?Yeah, that?s it.? She had unfaithfully recounted her conversation with Zan to Sapphire (with a lot of bias against the young man) over several rounds of Badsider.

Sapphire shook her head, ?You?re really burning through these guys fast, mama.?

?Yeah, I guess I am.? Jewell stretched out on her lounge chair, watching the sun set over the rooftops for a moment before rolling her head to look at the young woman. ?Better find a hardier one next time, don?t you think??

?Oh definitely.?

Tuesday, 19 December 2017

?It?s a comm device.?

?I know what it is,? she snapped. ?Why are you giving it to me??

?Because Ishmerai wanted you and all the girls to have them.?

Jewell stared at Sapphire, trying to wrap her head around that. ?My fae knight? wanted you??

?To make you all comm devices,? Sapphire finished impatiently. ?So that?s what I?ve been working on for the last few weeks. I actually bought some and had to reconstruct them so they would still work around all the magic and wards in this place and it wouldn?t fritz out if it came in contact with you on a regular basis.? Jewell looked neither impressed nor grateful. Just confused. ?And you know, it?s not easy to adapt so many.? Still nothing. Annoyed, she shoved the device into Jewell?s hands, ?I spent hours tinkering with it to get it perfect, so you better use it.?

?For what?? She turned the device around in her hands. The back was a midnight blue shot through with silver. The technomage faerie thought of everything it seemed. Even aesthetics.

?I don?t know! Sext for all I care. Just use it.?

?Sext??

Sapphire grinned, ?Yeah, you know. Send sexual text messages to someone, detailing--?

?Stop stop stop. I get it.? She dangled the device between her thumb and forefinger like it was some disgusting, foreign object. ?Is that really all it?s good for??

?No. They all have geo-locating capabilities between them. So if you don?t feel good or you need help, or you drop dead from a heart attack, we can find you.?

The elder faerie?s expression darkened. ?Ahhh so he had you make this? device so you can spy on me. Is that it??

?Yep!? Sapphire quipped. ?Pretty much.?

Monday, 8 January 2018

Text to Little Blue (10:51pm): I?m heading home already

Text to Mama 2.0 (10:51pm): That bad? Are you okay?

Text to Little Blue (10:54pm): Fight was okay. Kheld destroyed him. Promised to buy him a keg tomorrow. I just ignored everyone else.
Text to Little Blue (10:55pm): I think I made things worse with Canaan

Text to Mama 2.0 (10:55pm): I?ll be home in a little while

When Sapphire arrived ?home?--Jewell?s Little Elfhame loft relocated in the top floors of the sanatorium--the faerie Empress was lying facedown on the couch, still wearing her sparkly, silver hotpants and leather jacket. Sapphire had to pick her way across a minefield of abandoned high heels to reach her, plopping down right on her legs when she did.

?Oomph!?

?Wake up! Wake up! Wake up!?

?I?m awake. Brat.? Jewell reached back to swat at Sapphire, who just laughed and bounced a little, eliciting further moans and groans from Jewell as she twisted and turned over to look up at her. ?Stoooop. I?m fragile.?

?Deal with it.? She waited a beat. ?So, do you want to talk about it??

Jewell snagged a pillow, covering her face with it. ?Not really.?

?Come on,? Sapphire coaxed, tugging the pillow away. ?What happened??

?Nothing. It?s over. It?s been over. Hell, there apparently wasn?t even anything to be over in the first place.? She looked up at the ceiling instead of at Sapphire, ?He wanted something more with me and all I wanted was to **** him and be friends with benefits and that?s not good enough.? She left off: And I?m not good enough.

Her brow furrowed and she totally (graciously) overlooked the opportunity to chide Jewell about her language. ?Is that all you wanted though??

?Yes,? she replied quickly, and then just as quickly amended it, ?No? I don?t know.? She covered her face with her arms hands instead for a moment. ?It?s complicated.?

?Apparently,? Sapphire agreed dryly. ?Do you love him??

She was quiet for a long time before finally admitting: ?Maybe.?

?Did you tell him that??

?No.?

?Why not??

Jewell rolled her eyes before looking at Sapphire. ?Because it doesn?t exactly go so well when I do that, remember?? And because she never ever wanted to be that vulnerable ever again.

?Yeah,? Sapphire nodded, resting her head back against the couch. ?That is true. Also, telling someone you love them maybe probably wouldn?t go over so well, would it??

?Probably not.?

She chewed on the end of her blue-haired braid, thinking. ?So what now??

?I don?t know.?