Such a lonely day,
And it's mine.
The most loneliest day of my life.
Such a lonely day should be banned.
It's a day that I can't stand.
System of a Down?Lonely Day
There used to be only three days of the year that Jewell absolutely hated. Two months ago, to the day, she added one more. Cher, Skyler?the two little souls she lost before they even had a name. It was one of those days where you were better off not being alive or just never waking up until the day was through. Neither was an option for Jewell, unfortunately, and she opened her eyes to the darkness of her windowless room at the Sanctuary with a startled cry. Sitting upright, heart racing, she had to remind herself mentally where she was, particularly that she was not six feet under. Then she had to remind herself what day it was and she suddenly wished she were six feet under, alive or dead.
She groaned aloud to herself and flopped back down on the bed, hiding her face in her pillow. This was not good. It took a few years to learn that she only had a few options for a day such as this: hide away in bed and try to sleep the day away in between crying, find someplace to get absolutely smashed and therefore leave herself vulnerable and really just set herself up for more trouble, or pretend like everything was all right. Jewell had been doing too much pretending recently. Pretend she wasn?t scared. Pretend she still wasn?t hurting inside. Pretend she didn?t want to just scream at times.
Pretending wouldn?t do today.
Neither would getting drunk. She had been doing that too much lately too. Not that it was getting to be a problem, not in her mind. She was just a social drinker, is all. Yep, that would explain the four of five glasses of whiskey she had inhaled the previous night, right? No, drinking just wasn?t going to work today. That left her with just one option that she quickly embraced. Grabbing the blanket next to her, she pulled it up over her head and curled into the fetal position she favored on such occasions.
Trying to sleep away the day it is!
And it's mine.
The most loneliest day of my life.
Such a lonely day should be banned.
It's a day that I can't stand.
System of a Down?Lonely Day
There used to be only three days of the year that Jewell absolutely hated. Two months ago, to the day, she added one more. Cher, Skyler?the two little souls she lost before they even had a name. It was one of those days where you were better off not being alive or just never waking up until the day was through. Neither was an option for Jewell, unfortunately, and she opened her eyes to the darkness of her windowless room at the Sanctuary with a startled cry. Sitting upright, heart racing, she had to remind herself mentally where she was, particularly that she was not six feet under. Then she had to remind herself what day it was and she suddenly wished she were six feet under, alive or dead.
She groaned aloud to herself and flopped back down on the bed, hiding her face in her pillow. This was not good. It took a few years to learn that she only had a few options for a day such as this: hide away in bed and try to sleep the day away in between crying, find someplace to get absolutely smashed and therefore leave herself vulnerable and really just set herself up for more trouble, or pretend like everything was all right. Jewell had been doing too much pretending recently. Pretend she wasn?t scared. Pretend she still wasn?t hurting inside. Pretend she didn?t want to just scream at times.
Pretending wouldn?t do today.
Neither would getting drunk. She had been doing that too much lately too. Not that it was getting to be a problem, not in her mind. She was just a social drinker, is all. Yep, that would explain the four of five glasses of whiskey she had inhaled the previous night, right? No, drinking just wasn?t going to work today. That left her with just one option that she quickly embraced. Grabbing the blanket next to her, she pulled it up over her head and curled into the fetal position she favored on such occasions.
Trying to sleep away the day it is!