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The S.S. Breadsticks.
Crown Jewel of the RhyDin Watch Coast Guard. Vice Admiral Jesse commands her crew of three with an iron fist! They sail the waterways of RhyDin city and protect the public from pirates, smugglers, and slavers!
.. Unless they pay her a travel tax if she finds them, then they can use the docks all they want.
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The second ship in their mighty fleet is the S.S. Fio Has Nice Boobs
While the S.S. Breadsticks patrols during the night and into the early hour of the morning, the S.S. Fio Has Nice Boobs takes the day shift. Its commander is the Assistant TO the Vice Admiral, Isabella the Third. Also One-Arm and Lockjaw help.
Future Upgrades
The S.S. Breadsticks needs.
1: A flamethrower
2: A napalm thrower
3: Possibly a mix of the two
4: Blue fire?
5: Assault rifles
6: A crane for deep sea excavating
7: A cute crocodile floaty to ride on
8: Depth charges for explosy time
RULES OF THE RHYDIN WATCH COAST GUARD
1 ( and the most important ) : YOU ARE THE LAW!
2: Make sure people respect your authority
3: Use your nightstick whenever possible to assert your dominance over the public
4: Slap rowdy teens. Not teens all together, only the talkative / rude ones. Collie said it is allowed.
5: Do not slap babies
6: If you spot a vessel possibly doing illegal actions, demand they respect your authority and charge them a tax for using the coast guard waters
7: If they do not. Blow them up. Criminals do not have the same rights normal citizens do!
8: If another member of the Watch speaks ill of you, flash your badge and tell them to - and I quote - "Suck it."
9: You obviously outrank all other public officials if you work in mine crew. Exploit this to the fullest.
10: All treasure and bones will be brought to me, Vice Admiral Jesse, for inspection. Payment will follow.
How to Enforce the Law!
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This is your best friend. Your lover. Your child. Your mother. It is a sinner and also a saint. So do not feel ashamed to use it.
The best places to hit a person with this is three spots.
1: The head
When the skull makes a crunching sound and they squeal, you know you did something right!
2: The knees
Always work the knees. ALWAYS. Make them crumple to the ground and beg for mercy before you go for the head shot. Remember, if they do not respect your authority you go straight for the knees. By the third hit, they will respect you.
3. The Steve-Loves-Fio Spot
Just slam it in between a mans legs if he gives you trouble!
You're not some pansy-ass, you're a member of the Watch! BADASS SHOULD BE IN YOUR BLOOD!
What's more badass then making punks respect your authority?!