Sunday the 15th

Sergei returned from the auction late in the afternoon, tired and ready to veg for a while. He laid sprawled on the couch in the 'game room' across from his bedroom at the Bon Bon, reading a comic book upside down with his head hanging over the armrest.

Doc Savage: The Man of Bronze. One can do a lot worse with pulp heroes, certainly.

Katt's arrival was quiet. There was far too much on her mind and boy was it weighing heavy. She wasn't aware that the Bon Bon already had someone in it. He was gone so much, or at the barn, that she simply didn't expect him there. Making her way to the living room the door was opened and before actually making her way to the couch she threw her dufflebag over the back of it and onto the unknown sleepy-head. Oops!

"Oomph!" A projectile was returned, in the form of one of his comic books. "Watch it, I'm reading here!" He hoisted her bag off of his stomach and sat up, turning to face her. "What's up?"

Katt blinked, twice. "Oh s-sorry!" She scratched at the back of her head and grinned a bit. "Didn't know you were there." Really could a comic be considered reading? She moved over to plop herself in the chair nearby, body bent forward with her elbows on her knees. "Oh... um, nothing..."

Yes it could! Sergei would have argued, were he asked. But he was not. Instead he took notice of Katt's tone, increasingly familiar in the last month or so... "Something is," he countered with a small frown, folding his arms over the back of the couch, gaze closely following her progress to the chair.

"Just a lot of stuff on my mind. Lots and lots of stuff." Her lips pursed softly and eventually relaxed as she looked up to him. "I am... surprised to see you here. You aren't in the Bon Bon all that often. Is something wrong?"

Sergei paused, and slowly shook his head. "I'm here most nights... just, uh, later than this, usually." He shrugged. "The auction went fine, we got my mom a good dairy cow and some other stuff..." He shook his head. He was getting distracted. "Something is wrong though... isn't it?"

She scratched at the side of her neck. She didn't want to bring it up. Just thinking about it placed a disgusting taste in her mouth. "I..." Her brows furrowed and she looked over to him. "Sergei, I've been thinking..." That wasn't how she wanted to start. Ruffling her hair back she looked away. This sucked. She didn't want to hurt him.

There was a small but growing part of Sergei that anticipated what was coming. "Yeah?"

Her hand rotated forward and covered her face. He had done so much for her. It wasn't right of her, was it? The more she thought about hurting him the more she wanted to cry. "I think we should just be friends."

"What? Just...? ...oh," he finished, as if relenting. He folded his arms tighter and looked at the far wall. He was silent, other than a slow, deep breath, then another, sighing through his nose. "We talked... about stuff, before... I mean..." He swallowed. "This isn't the first time you've, um... wanted to say this, is it."

Her head tilted up and she looked at him, her eyes glossy. "Sergei. I adore you. I really do. And it isn't because there is someone else." She pushed herself to her feet, the need to move becoming unbareable. "I just... I think it would be better if we were friends. You've got a full schedule and are just starting out on a lot of it. You don't need a relationship. You need a friend. Someone who can be here when you need them. And I always will be..." She was pacing uncomfortably. "I just... I really don't want to hurt you."

"What? But I -- listen, I can work on -- !" Sergei began, going most of the way out of his seat toward her, when he stopped. He stared at her for a long moment, then lowered his gaze. "...I've done this before..." He sunk back into his seat, arms draped over his knees, and looked at his hands. "I don't... want you to go... but you want to go, and I should stop stopping you, shouldn't I. Shouldn't I," he echoed, looking up at her again. "Katt, I'm sorry."

She blinked and looked over to him. Sighing she turned and moved her way to him and covered his hands with hers. "Sergei, I'm not going anywhere. I am still going to be here. You have all of this going for you, that right now you just don't have room for anything else. My problems you just sorta smile through and brush aside... and things like Winterfest... There were so many who asked where you were, why I was alone..." Her head tilted slightly to the side and she gave a weak smile. "I even had someone ask if you were my imaginary boyfriend." She tapped his hands again. "I'm the one who is sorry."

"I work, Katt," he pleaded thinly, squeezing her hands. "I don't brush aside -- you're more important to me than my work, but I can't just stop! Just because I want to, and I do, to stay on the ground... stay here, with you..." He let go of her hands and turned away, leaving his seat.

"It's not... I don't know what to do, Katt... it's uphill keeping my plane in the air, meeting expenses, trying to do... trying to make something of it, I barely make it... I..." He gasped a breath, thankfully with his back turned to her, and lowered his hands. "...I guess that... doesn't make a difference. I still... whatever the reason, I can't be there to make you happy, and..."

He cleared his throat, steadying the trembling, and picked another corner away from her to look at. Rubbed the back of his neck. "...I think I won't be in town, for a week or so... I mean, I'll be back if you, you know, you still want to be friends and, I mean... I'll be back... just that I'm gonna go be with my family, for a while..."

Watching him broke her heart. A hand reached out to him but she forced herself to stop. She was actually afraid he might lash at her. "I work too." Or had he forgotten that she owned the Bon Bon? "I don't want you to stop. You love flying! And I am supporting that. Don't you see that...?"

Her chin dipped. "Of course I want you to come back. I'm sorry. Listen... forget I said anything." She couldn't do it. She couldn't hurt him. "I don't want to hurt you..."

Sergei turned back to her; he had been crying, was still, but it was quiet now. He caressed her face as if to memorize, lifted her chin, and kissed her, slow and sweet... and then broke it. "I know," he breathed. "But I'm not gonna forget you said anything, because it's what you wanted to say. You meant it." He made himself let go of her completely, took a step back, summoned a brave smile for about three quarters of a second before it faltered. "But we're still friends, right? You mean that... when I come back, when we're ready... I can see you again?"

She could have died then and there. Tears began to work down her cheeks at the kiss. Before he could get too far her arms went around his shoulders and she buried her face into his neck. "I'm sorry." And it was repeated almost endlessly.

" 'S not your fault," he said, finally. His fingers curled affectionately in her hair, he squeezed her gently, and finally let her go. "I should, um," he said with a gasp, feeling like he was about to cry more. "Just, uh... yeah. Get a few things." He cleared his throat to steady his voice.

Her hands dropped and she stepped back, her head turning away. "I'm sorry. I'm... I really am horrible aren't I?" She laughed weakly as she retreated to the window. That way she didn't have to watch him go.

"You're not horrible," he protested as she retreated, watching her with a frown.

"Sergei, we will always be friends, until you tell me otherwise..."


"Nah, Katt..." He jingled her necklace until she turned and looked at it, and smiled, a weak but brave smile. "Always always." He bent down to scoop Doc Savage off the living room floor and left.

Hearing the sound she turned to look at what he was doing to see him toying with the wing. Her fingers rose up to her own mech wing, fingers curling around it protectively. "Sergei..." She wanted to tell him, but ended up just sort of backing down. After he left, she told the empty room: "I want you to succeed."

* * *

Only silence as it's ending, like we never had a chance.


((Adapted from live play with Katt, with thanks!))