Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing, there is a field. I'll meet you there.
When the soul lies down in that grass, the world is too full to talk about. - Rumi
Glenn only shrugged again and looked over his shoulder at her as they left the buildings behind for open roads and fields. He clucked his tongue and started whistling a tune he remembered from his childhood, he?d forgotten the words. He said a couple of hours but the moon had started to descend again before he ever made note of it and when he did, he just pulled the reins and slid from the saddle and turned to help her down, too. ?Might be time we sleep for a few hours,? he suggested, tilting his head at her curiously. ?Got some apples and what-not in the saddle bag, if you?re feelin? hungry.?
Her face tilted as she looked down at him past her hair; his suggestion plucked something of a chord in the woman. It?d been three years since she made a bed on the road. A smile. Her hand filled his and down she got. A pat of thanks to King. ?I?m a little peckish?, as she dug around in one of the indicated bags, grabbing two fruit and a knife as good for whittling wood or giving a man his death as it was for peeling, and her vision panned to fill with road and field, and further, where dirt trail wove to an oak spreading arms, arms that the wind shaped and roots that the earth tugged. Blade slipped through green skin, it curled and fell beside their dusty boots. ?Nothing like sleeping under a tree. Had some of my best dreams underneath them, as a little girl?, Glenn given another smile, it promised faraway. The wind changed and drove back at them all warm with the West, and the tolling requiem of a dead town. Madison crossed through the memory and emerged within the tall grass headed for that oak and its trunk, where she slipped down to press her back to bark. ?Tell me, what do you think you?ll find in York?? Knee raised, wrist and apple held there. The blade slid again, curved off a slice which she held out for him. ?If home isn?t there, what remains for a man like you?? She wondered to herself what memories might be waiting for him in York and if he could leave them again.
"What will I find?" he asked with a tilt of his head. He wasn't sure what he find or what he expected. He just had this urge, this need to go and see it for himself at last. He'd been putting off the return home since the day he left and something about his place in the world, at that time, with that woman said that now it would be alright. "More questions than answers, I'll wager. Don't know if there's anything for me. Don't know if I want there to be. Just know it's somethin' that needs doin', been waitin' too long for it," he leaned forward and he snatched the slice of apple from her and let it crunch between his teeth with a little smirk and a wink. Then he twisted around and he stood and he led King over near the tree to tie his reins around the trunk before giving him another patting and a handful of oats to chew on. He sat back down again, right next to his gunslinger of a woman.
A grin curved around an apple slice. The blade slid again, another piece out for him, this time however, dangling it right before that impervious mouth of his. Blue eyes narrowed on his features, thinking back to him telling her about his scars and how their shape had rewritten part of his life. She dragged a slice off the blade with her teeth thoughtfully ?I think maybe it?s a season for it?, that easy rise and fall of her shoulders, another sink of the knife. Another curl fell to the grass.
?You know when it?s like..? her eyes glittered, ?like life conspires with that something you can?t explain and you know if you don?t make that move now, that if you do it later, if you dare wait?, she held out the knife for him to steal the next bite off the point, ?that it?s not going to be the same. It?s.. it?s like you know if you wait the door will close. I felt like that going back to Lofton. Like it had to be done, no waiting. And I don?t like how it happened, that Michael?s dead, and sure as the day you?ll find something you don?t like back home too? but maybe, this is the time for us to change what made us so bad.?
A breath of laughter fell from her, she shook her head. ?I don?t know quite what I?m saying to you. Only that I believe this. That I think .. I think some doors are only open once and never again.?
A pause, a wry smile took her. ?Though I suppose, in your case, if the door shuts, you could always just break yourself a window.?
She pressed a kiss to his jaw and folded back up against him, her head in the crook of his shoulder. Leg along his leg, boot against his boot. Gun beside his gun. ?Papa said there was never any use in hesitating.?
?I never hesitated in my life,? he lied as she took up her lean against him. He reached over to steal an apple and dismissed her method to take a good, solid bite with a nice and noisy crunch. ?I just don?t like doing things that I don?t got a reason for doing. And as far as I know, there?s not much of a reason for going back to York. Curiosity aside, I can?t think of a single god damned thing that would send me back. But here I am, Madison Rye, campin? out by the road on the way to York.?
?I swore when I left that I?d never go back.?
??Course I also swore that I would never do anything wrong and I didn?t keep to that, neither. So what?s one more broken promise??
He clucked his tongue and took another bite of the apple, then tossed it overhand across the field where it rolled into the tall grass and disappeared. ?Best get some shut eye. I ain?t one to waste time sittin? around when there?s somethin? to be done.?
His voice rumbled at her back and into chest. Words to talk around her heart. ?I said I wouldn?t pick up a gun again and here I am, eighteen months later, doing just that.? Then he was bossing her around again and the woman peered back at him upside down. There he was, the one who?d turned her world a different way around. She poked out her tongue and wriggled down into his lap, her head on his thighs, and she closed her eyes.
Two gunslingers dreamed beneath an oak tree.
Two hours later, they stirred again and mounted. The next two hours saw them ride into sunrise. Three girls in threadbare dresses, with peonies behind their ears and bared feet walked by. Madison smiled at them and gave an upward nod. Two frowned but one girl, the last, smiled, watching the pair of them with nothing short of some wonder and a hurried wave. A small boy came running up behind them, fingers pressed, shooting phantom bullets at girls, his sisters perhaps. The girls screamed and ran off giggling. The boy then looked up to the two on horseback and his hand fell. He stared at Glenn like he were a ghost. Up ahead was dirt and dust and tired shopfront.
York reminded her of what Lofton had been when she had moved there at eighteen. Before business came in to bring more flow to the town. Before Hexx. It was quiet like this. Its simplicity struck her and she looked back towards the children as the horse carried them on and away. Maybe if she?d stayed behind in Lofton, in that house, she?d have a few herself. The girl who had smiled and waved was still waving when Madison looked over shoulder. She waved back, farewelling the girl and the recollection.
?Where do you want to start??, she asked at the outlaw?s back. ?Would your parents still be alive do you think??
?Pa?s likely gone and dug himself a grave by now, don?t imagine Mother would last long without him,? he shook his head at her and he clucked his tongue to get King moving again. They went down a long road made of dirt and dust with dried blood settled beneath it from the many bandits and raiders that had come a calling and been shot dead by Glenn?s Pa? and subsequent sheriffs. Glenn wasn?t sure what to make of this town called York. It was different but much the same from what he remembered. ?My brother might still be suckin? air. Or, if it ain?t him, my sister out on the ranch. We?ll go there next. I gotta see the family home, see if it?s still standing.?
A smile curled easily on his lips and he nodded at a trio of old men who sat outside the equally old saloon, all groaning wood and dust covered floors. One in particular eyed him with more interest than the others, the faint spark of recognition visible in his weary gaze. No one said a word as Glenn and Madison rode by.
The house was at the end of that dirt road that cut straight through the center of town. It was larger than those around it and looked about ready to fall to pieces, but miraculously it still stood. Glenn looked up at it with its old, dusty windows and creaking shutters and he slid from King's saddle to stand out in front of the steps leading up to the porch, a hand on his gun. He climbed up and he stood in front of the old door. He tried the knob and it opened and inside a ray of sunlight cut through the dust that plagued the air and fell over a hook with an old coat hanging from it and a small table with a picture covered in inches of dust.
"No one's home."
When the soul lies down in that grass, the world is too full to talk about. - Rumi
Glenn only shrugged again and looked over his shoulder at her as they left the buildings behind for open roads and fields. He clucked his tongue and started whistling a tune he remembered from his childhood, he?d forgotten the words. He said a couple of hours but the moon had started to descend again before he ever made note of it and when he did, he just pulled the reins and slid from the saddle and turned to help her down, too. ?Might be time we sleep for a few hours,? he suggested, tilting his head at her curiously. ?Got some apples and what-not in the saddle bag, if you?re feelin? hungry.?
Her face tilted as she looked down at him past her hair; his suggestion plucked something of a chord in the woman. It?d been three years since she made a bed on the road. A smile. Her hand filled his and down she got. A pat of thanks to King. ?I?m a little peckish?, as she dug around in one of the indicated bags, grabbing two fruit and a knife as good for whittling wood or giving a man his death as it was for peeling, and her vision panned to fill with road and field, and further, where dirt trail wove to an oak spreading arms, arms that the wind shaped and roots that the earth tugged. Blade slipped through green skin, it curled and fell beside their dusty boots. ?Nothing like sleeping under a tree. Had some of my best dreams underneath them, as a little girl?, Glenn given another smile, it promised faraway. The wind changed and drove back at them all warm with the West, and the tolling requiem of a dead town. Madison crossed through the memory and emerged within the tall grass headed for that oak and its trunk, where she slipped down to press her back to bark. ?Tell me, what do you think you?ll find in York?? Knee raised, wrist and apple held there. The blade slid again, curved off a slice which she held out for him. ?If home isn?t there, what remains for a man like you?? She wondered to herself what memories might be waiting for him in York and if he could leave them again.
"What will I find?" he asked with a tilt of his head. He wasn't sure what he find or what he expected. He just had this urge, this need to go and see it for himself at last. He'd been putting off the return home since the day he left and something about his place in the world, at that time, with that woman said that now it would be alright. "More questions than answers, I'll wager. Don't know if there's anything for me. Don't know if I want there to be. Just know it's somethin' that needs doin', been waitin' too long for it," he leaned forward and he snatched the slice of apple from her and let it crunch between his teeth with a little smirk and a wink. Then he twisted around and he stood and he led King over near the tree to tie his reins around the trunk before giving him another patting and a handful of oats to chew on. He sat back down again, right next to his gunslinger of a woman.
A grin curved around an apple slice. The blade slid again, another piece out for him, this time however, dangling it right before that impervious mouth of his. Blue eyes narrowed on his features, thinking back to him telling her about his scars and how their shape had rewritten part of his life. She dragged a slice off the blade with her teeth thoughtfully ?I think maybe it?s a season for it?, that easy rise and fall of her shoulders, another sink of the knife. Another curl fell to the grass.
?You know when it?s like..? her eyes glittered, ?like life conspires with that something you can?t explain and you know if you don?t make that move now, that if you do it later, if you dare wait?, she held out the knife for him to steal the next bite off the point, ?that it?s not going to be the same. It?s.. it?s like you know if you wait the door will close. I felt like that going back to Lofton. Like it had to be done, no waiting. And I don?t like how it happened, that Michael?s dead, and sure as the day you?ll find something you don?t like back home too? but maybe, this is the time for us to change what made us so bad.?
A breath of laughter fell from her, she shook her head. ?I don?t know quite what I?m saying to you. Only that I believe this. That I think .. I think some doors are only open once and never again.?
A pause, a wry smile took her. ?Though I suppose, in your case, if the door shuts, you could always just break yourself a window.?
She pressed a kiss to his jaw and folded back up against him, her head in the crook of his shoulder. Leg along his leg, boot against his boot. Gun beside his gun. ?Papa said there was never any use in hesitating.?
?I never hesitated in my life,? he lied as she took up her lean against him. He reached over to steal an apple and dismissed her method to take a good, solid bite with a nice and noisy crunch. ?I just don?t like doing things that I don?t got a reason for doing. And as far as I know, there?s not much of a reason for going back to York. Curiosity aside, I can?t think of a single god damned thing that would send me back. But here I am, Madison Rye, campin? out by the road on the way to York.?
?I swore when I left that I?d never go back.?
??Course I also swore that I would never do anything wrong and I didn?t keep to that, neither. So what?s one more broken promise??
He clucked his tongue and took another bite of the apple, then tossed it overhand across the field where it rolled into the tall grass and disappeared. ?Best get some shut eye. I ain?t one to waste time sittin? around when there?s somethin? to be done.?
His voice rumbled at her back and into chest. Words to talk around her heart. ?I said I wouldn?t pick up a gun again and here I am, eighteen months later, doing just that.? Then he was bossing her around again and the woman peered back at him upside down. There he was, the one who?d turned her world a different way around. She poked out her tongue and wriggled down into his lap, her head on his thighs, and she closed her eyes.
Two gunslingers dreamed beneath an oak tree.
Two hours later, they stirred again and mounted. The next two hours saw them ride into sunrise. Three girls in threadbare dresses, with peonies behind their ears and bared feet walked by. Madison smiled at them and gave an upward nod. Two frowned but one girl, the last, smiled, watching the pair of them with nothing short of some wonder and a hurried wave. A small boy came running up behind them, fingers pressed, shooting phantom bullets at girls, his sisters perhaps. The girls screamed and ran off giggling. The boy then looked up to the two on horseback and his hand fell. He stared at Glenn like he were a ghost. Up ahead was dirt and dust and tired shopfront.
York reminded her of what Lofton had been when she had moved there at eighteen. Before business came in to bring more flow to the town. Before Hexx. It was quiet like this. Its simplicity struck her and she looked back towards the children as the horse carried them on and away. Maybe if she?d stayed behind in Lofton, in that house, she?d have a few herself. The girl who had smiled and waved was still waving when Madison looked over shoulder. She waved back, farewelling the girl and the recollection.
?Where do you want to start??, she asked at the outlaw?s back. ?Would your parents still be alive do you think??
?Pa?s likely gone and dug himself a grave by now, don?t imagine Mother would last long without him,? he shook his head at her and he clucked his tongue to get King moving again. They went down a long road made of dirt and dust with dried blood settled beneath it from the many bandits and raiders that had come a calling and been shot dead by Glenn?s Pa? and subsequent sheriffs. Glenn wasn?t sure what to make of this town called York. It was different but much the same from what he remembered. ?My brother might still be suckin? air. Or, if it ain?t him, my sister out on the ranch. We?ll go there next. I gotta see the family home, see if it?s still standing.?
A smile curled easily on his lips and he nodded at a trio of old men who sat outside the equally old saloon, all groaning wood and dust covered floors. One in particular eyed him with more interest than the others, the faint spark of recognition visible in his weary gaze. No one said a word as Glenn and Madison rode by.
The house was at the end of that dirt road that cut straight through the center of town. It was larger than those around it and looked about ready to fall to pieces, but miraculously it still stood. Glenn looked up at it with its old, dusty windows and creaking shutters and he slid from King's saddle to stand out in front of the steps leading up to the porch, a hand on his gun. He climbed up and he stood in front of the old door. He tried the knob and it opened and inside a ray of sunlight cut through the dust that plagued the air and fell over a hook with an old coat hanging from it and a small table with a picture covered in inches of dust.
"No one's home."