A simple object sat in most homes in the Den City or in Fang Wood Academy or in the dwellings of most Lupinossai all over Rhydin. A non-sentient soul gem harnessed to receiver technology picking up the broadcast waves from the Den?s Magik Net. Ever one of them across Rhydin began to glow and hum. A broadcast was coming on.
*Crackle, Pop, Hiss*
This thing on?
*Clunk, Rattle, Groping sounds* The light is blinking. Do you mean you know nothing of this equipment you have?
Eh. You flip the switch thingy and I shove this black dohicky into your muzzle... *Clunk*
*Clack, Snag, Smack* Give me that microphone before I throw you out of my Academy wench!
Ah, ah. Do I make this bill to General Igneous Fi'igoo or Governor of Fang Wood Academy?
What bill?
The one the Den Howler will be sending you for insulting a working woman on live broad cast. Or, I can let it slip and that little love slap if you buy me dinner and a date.
Remind me why I allowed you into my Academy?
A: It's open to the public. B: It's Den Election time. C: You're one of the candidates. Shall I start asking questions, or are you going to continue to sulk? This is Tazzy Stream Dancer with the Den Howler here listeners interviewing electoral candidate Igneous Fi?igoo for Den Elections 2013.
*Slight Grinding of Teeth* Ask your questions and send me a bill. I'm spoken for.
Oooo. Spoken for? Well now. Question one. How will your love life be affected if you are voted as Den Leader?
You're serious? Aren't you?
Thousands of listeners want to know Iggy baby.
My love life with be private just as it is now, and far more prosperous than yours. Next question.
Fiesty! If you win, what would you do for the Den that prior leaders have not done?
Besides not continuing the endless circus of mishaps, disasters, and public failures? Hmm. For one, removal of magic practice restrictions on mages. Renewal of the depleted military. Sharper laws and tighter defense. Perhaps a caste system.
So a reviving of Den Spiritor all over. How well did that work out for your ancestors?
Next... question. *slight snarl heard*
We'll take a short sponsor break.
*Several minutes of colorful sounding and tacky radio tune commercials are played.*
And we are back listeners. Remember the words of our last sponsor. If your Flying Broom just aint flyin' straight, come on down to Zigs Black Cat tower for a straw replacement and twine upgrade.
You need better sponsors.
What's wrong with the Den Howlers sponsors?
Zombie Pep Squad? Dragon Wash R Us? Daycare and Neuter Clinic? The Mighty Wizards of Dishes and Chores? All low brow.
Bills are paid and fine listeners are entertained. My father didn't buy me into a governor?s position.
My position was gained with hard work, miss Stream-Dancer. Do you have more questions?
Ah, yes. Start a war and go up against the current leader of the Den and get handed a scrap of land to live on in exile. Hard work indeed, Governor Fi'igoo. Yes. More questions. Would you further city works, education and the programs for the poor, orphaned and widowed in the Den?
*Muffling of the mike and muted words* What is that dragon doing now?
You have a dragon Igneous? Is it a free citizen?*A few bumps and a clacking of a mike getting close to something*
A rumble as Blizzards neck arched to try an peek inside. Still she was too far off, and another snort sounded.
None of your concern about my dragon. I am simply the guardian while my star pupil is out somewhere doing who knows what with a very disreputable teacher.
Would this be a Fang Wood Academy teacher? Didn't know your academy had disreputable teachers giving classes. Should parents be concerned and send their children to the LLC?
*Sound of a fire ball crackling*
Right. Back on topic. City works, education, the poor, orphaned and the widowed?
Blizzard Shimmerscale snorted. The chains rattled and soon there was a call.
City works would be continued, modernized and enhanced with magic. As to the rest everyone would be evaluated, and sorted by what they are deemed best at. Education will be given according to what each child or adult is qualified for and everyone will be employed... *Thwap of a window opening. Muffled yelling* Throw the dragon some meat and maybe a Drow!
You feed some of your citizens to a dragon? Uhm... so you're suggesting that under your rule everyone would be cared for in a handpicked fashion without freedom of choice?
Nostrils twitched as Blizzard paced now, watching for any sign of food. She was hungry! Food was delivered to said dragon.
May I remind the listeners that three years of free choice has lead to several disasters in the Den and the constant re-election of the same family members of a inbred, deranged blood line that is unfit to rule.
Aw, now someone is just a sore loser after one little war. The Wolf-Spiritor family has lead the Den in many things....
Food! A growl and soon Blizzard was nearly lunging. Snapping up whatever meat had been provided. If she bit the one providing the food.. Well it wasn't her fault!
Half the Den destroyed, plagues, Necromancers, rogue Mages... Besides me, stop staring!... murders and a rise in crime not to mention one leader publically announcing his involvement in the killing of Den Council members.
Leaders are only 'human'. Moving along. Trade? What would you do to foster Den trade with the rest of Rhydin?
Trade would actually be improved for once. Rhydin has a rail system. Something I was thinking about for some time but never had the investments to start. I would petition the Rhydin governor to install a route to Fang Wood Academy and then I would build our own routes between the Academy and the Den facilitating faster transportation and movement of goods. Fang Wood Academy had benefited vastly by being a crossroad to all races and professions.
Are you saying the Den is aloof?
A growl sounded, and it wasn't long before all the meat Blizzard had been thrown had disappeared down her jaws. Nostrils flared, and soon she was tugging against the chain. Obviously it had been reinforced.
Hardly. You can't through a rock without hitting a dwarf, gnome, dragon or Kender in that city. I would say it's lost some of its value really and diluted it's Lupinossai population by whor.... being so generous with other races.
Tsk. Almost had another bill to write up. What about cultural strengthening?
*Snort* Yes, like most Lupinossai want to remember their past and most outsiders want to hear our drama. I suppose a standardized history and indoctrination would be implemented.
Wings beat as Blizzard tried moving closer.
Wouldn't that destroy all cultural relevance that each Lupinossai has from heritage passed down to them from the ancient eight Great Dens?
Just how Blizzards chain got tangled with the tree.. Well was up for some debate. A hiss, and a squawk trying to untangle herself from the branches.
For the love of Canis' tits! What has gotten into that dragon! *Clatter, clunk, scrape, bang of window opening, obscene words shouted and wafting dragon roars over the mike*
This is what Blizzard got for trying to get closer. More roaring sounding.
*Gasping sounds* Sincere apologies to all listeners and any children out there crying at this very moment from the foul language Governor Igneous Fi'igoo is using. That is Governor Igneous Fi'igoo, Head Master of Fang Wood Academy, Head Office. He'll be happy to donate to your favorite charity to say he?s sorry.
After sending a wave of staff and soldiers to placate, play with, feed, pet, calm or something to settle the beast, the sound of the window slamming shut is heard. Lousy, stinking, excuse for walking boots. I should have it stuffed for Raws... This thing still on?
Once again, that's Governor Igneous Fi'igoo, Head Master of Fang Wood Den.
Ever seen what lightning does to a reporter?
Puts a mage under arrest and closes his school?
It would take the staff quite some time to get Blizzard?s chain untangled. A few stroking her snout reassuringly while others pondered the puzzle of just how the chain and tree had become so entwined.
Wonder if Ammy has a Smite Reporter spell? In answering your question, all heritage is history from different viewpoints. That is a very inefficient method of learning history. One needs an un-opinionated and uncompromised version of history.
Right. So we can begin teaching everyone Den Wolf's history view point?
Do you take lessons in irritating your interviewees?
Just you Iggy. What can I say. A man in robes drives me nuts.*kissing sound are heard*
One of the staff managed to unchain Blizzard and gave a tug on the lead. Just where were they going? Surely not inside! Another light tug, and that was exactly where she was being led.
5...4....3....2.....1.... *deep breath heard* Den Wolf's history view point may be considered among many others. Next question.
Sir?The staff member stood at the door with the chain in his hands. and well the dragon remained on the other end, tugging against the one holding her.
What would you do about defending the Den? Working with foreign powers and nations in Rhydin? And handling rogue mages and this Necromancer rumor that's been going around?
Defense is easy. Reestablish the military. Be rid of the useless DFLEA agency and set up...dragon... why is it in my office?!
Ah so this is the mystery Dragon we've heard so much about. So pretty.
We had to get it out of the.. tree. Blizzard rumbled and tugged again, nearly sending the male flying.
Yes, pretty. Get closer and give it a pet. Wear some of this steak sauce while you?re at it.
Ah, ah. News Journalists are just empty calories. Rice cakes and all that. So military beef up, removal of police and setting up what again for defense?
Soul knights. *Growling tone*
My my. Breaking laws already. Dealing with Foreign powers and nations in Rhydin?
Soon Blizzard was sniffing around, moving closer to Tazzy. Was she still hungry?
Depends on what happens. *Rustle of robes and a clap of paws to shoo away a mentioned dragon*
Now a sniff to Igneous, and? That tongue flicked, giving him a sloppy, slobbery lick.
Not a very strong strategy, Governor Fi'igoo. Vuusoolta Wolf has met often with outside nations for tea and other celebrations to talk about events and negotiations. *Slide and pet of the dragons snout with her dainty paw.* Aw, don't they feed you anything? Here, have a high calorie bar, you look wafer thin. *Candy wrapper is heard being opened*
Slobber dribbled down her jaws as Blizzard sniffed the wrapper that was being opened.
Don't feed my dragon, miss Tazzy. Foreign Nations and Foreign Powers are not a concern to the Den for the most part. That city is isolated more times than not.
*Feeds the gooey chocolate protein bar to the dragon* I can't help it Iggy. Someone has to take pity on your limp lizard. Odd that you say the Den city is isolated when previously you mention it is teeming with enough races it?s diluting the Lupinossai living there. What about Rogue Mages and Necromancers?
*Splutter*
Sniff. Soon the chocolate bar was gone and Blizzard nudged Igneous's hand with her snout.
*Sounds of a dragon being petted*
Aw. Be very quiet listeners and you'll hear proof that Igneous has a heart.
Another rumble, this one sounding content. Meanwhile outside the staff were working on trying to clear the dragon's old bedding.
I am not beyond caring. I am very fond of one student. Rawsha, wherever she is out there. I do miss her and her mother. The question to rogue magi and necromancers. Why should I police them?
Public danger to people in the Den. Property destruction. Pups seeing their dead grandmothers pinching their cheeks. No child should suffer that fate again after an elderly family member has passed on. Just isn't right.
Tazzy? May just have gotten a testing lick.
Wooo...hooo...hey now!
::Slobber and all!::
That listeners was Tazzy enjoying my lizard.
Magic users are free to practice unless they break laws. Plain and simple. Further governing of them would be like breaking the leg on a child wanting to run.
*Fizzle spit of a mike soaked in dragon drool* But it's perfectly fine to break the legs of the common Lupinossai who don't do magic?
I don't make the rules about who is born with what.
Now there was heavy breathing sounding in the microphone. It was a curious thing.
Ack. Don't, nooo! *Squeeeee, crunch, gurgle*
*Tap, tap, tap.* Whew. Thank Lupis for a back up mike. Billing you for that too Igneous.
Mikes were edible, yes? A growl, and soon Blizzard was sniffing Tazzy again.
Maybe I should just give you a castle? *Sarcasm* Anymore questions? The dragon seems very curious about you. You might be tasty.
Mics weren't quite tasty, but fingers.. A nudge with Blizzards snout.
Ah.. right. I think I have enough now to give a clear, unbiased interview on Igneous Fi'igoo, candidate for Den Governor. Here, take them all!*A cascade of bouncing wrapped candy bars was heard hitting the floor and paws moving rapidly away.*
You fogot your mike!
Keep it! *Door slams closed in haste*
Crunch, munch. Wrappers and all. Did Blizzard really need chocolate?
I think I'll send it to you dire wolf express and... bill you for it.*Chuckles* Igneous Fi'igoo here. Candidate for Den Governor. Elect me, and I'll turn the Den around and put us in the right direction. What direction is that? A strong militaristic, prosperous age of magic and fortune. Fang Wood Academy out. And you my wonderful dragon, I've forgotten about you. Did you miss me cuddlekins? We'll get you all settled into a nice comfy stall, groomed, flown and happy until Rawsha is back.... It's still on isn't it? *Click, hiss, silence....*