( Author's Note: Picks up where Green Grass Beneath a Blade leaves off. )
As we burn, pretending to fight it
Everyone learns faster on fire
Things took a turn, lost all desire
You live and you burn
You live and...
Like hell we are anxiously waiting
Like hell burning silently strong
Somehow we fell down by the wayside
And somehow this hell is home
Right now, this hell is my home
- Alkaline Trio
Red Dragon Inn
Laughter. Skado's laughter from the chair where he sat. Skado was laughing? Alma had just left them for home, and her words were fresh in Victoria's mind.
I am for home, love, and my eyes will be like moons upon the door hoping to see the knob turn in your hands...
Viki was slow to slip from that stool, but slip she did, and her delicate feet were on the move once more. Her eyes were fierce, as it suddenly dawned on her that she'd never heard the sandman laugh before. Never. Not once. Chuckle, sure. By chuckle, she meant, a brief huff of air, as was his tendency. Not laugh. This was a strange, dry sound.
Her small feet skidded 'round another girl who had been quietly playing with paper animals. Viki could clearly see the images in her mind, the little animal reality the girl had created, and if she got sidetracked, oh, and how easy that was, she wouldn't be able to make this journey.
Viki stopped short at the hearth with small fists clenched at her sides as if she were bound to hit something, anything, but the seer was not one for violence. Instead, the words that poured from her were sharp enough. She'd learned how to arm them by listening to his own short speeches when he was disturbed by her questioning.
"One word from you.. One word." She stammered, trying to pick her words carefully as she crossed her arms. "You tell me it is not impossible, but you.. you.." She tossed her hands into air. "One word from you, and I will not touch her again, or anyone, for that matter. But you do not give me words.." Then, she felt the pull of that distant reality, of the paper animals on the floor, and suddenly felt herself small and among them.
His dark eyes had been watching her the whole time. Finally, when he knew she had finished, he spoke.
"That is because your choices are you own to make, for they make you a being and a mind unto yourself. It is not disapproval of your dear mistress's effect that repels me... it is that she owns your movements. "
Viki felt weak, and thought it best to settle upon the floor, quite near the warmth of the blazing fire. She picked up a lonely lion and let it sit in her palm. Looking away from him now, she spoke directly to the paper animal, her new captive audience. "He gives me paper things but does not speak and he thinks I make poor choices when choices I wish to make are not meant to be received."
Her eyes were brimming with tears, but she looked past the lion and into the flickering flames of the hearth. "The furnace owns the movement of a flame, 'for it ensnares it, overwhelms it, and it has no where else to go."
His rough laugh sounded off again. "But who is David?"
Yes. We've been meaning to ask you about that too.
Viki blinked and set the lion down. It was best he'd join his pride before she flung him into the fire. She wasn't one for fits, but she was related to Tara.
"A man whose movements are owned by another. One I have not seen in weeks." By another, she meant Talomar of course, but in truth, she held no malice towards the man. She did not agree with or entirely understand their business transactions, and in truth she hadn't seen David for weeks. That was his fault, and that was her fault, and perhaps he heard rumors of her affair with Alma.
C'est la vie.
Viki wasn't meant to be in a monogamous relationship anyway. She'd tell herself it was her nature, later on, when the lingering guilt caught up to her. Then perhaps her flickering consciousness would pull her into a whole new plane, and she wouldn't have to deal with any of these problems.
And Amthy was dead. She couldn't go home and face Tara with the secret knowledge of her true murderer. She couldn't go home and face David if he was even still there at all. She just couldn't go home at all.
She turned her head, absently, to look at Skado, though she knew it probably made no difference to meet his gaze.
"One word from you.." Her voice was softer, as if she had just surrendered, and no longer did her blood boil as they ran their chosen courses. "I meant to say, one word to offer, and not to direct."
His reaction was much like the calm before a violent storm. His silence seemed to stretch for a small lifetime, and although he showed nothing in his face or his eyes, perhaps something raged within.
"I am not a maker of choice... but the choice is there, if you wish it."
It was though something had struck her then, though it was not painful. In an instant, she was on her feet, though the movement was quite fluid, and it took a moment to realize how she had done it, as it seemed almost.. unnatural. Then, she made an elegant stride, but she was quiet still. Her eyes said enough. Little tears still clung to their very corners, perhaps evidence of her affection? She rounded the chair where he perched until her knees met the armed cushion, and she hovered just above him.
"I wish it."
"I am not so full of summer flattery as your tweed woman... and I do have mate." He was still as she killed the distance between them.
"I do not care about you're having of a mate, unless she cares otherwise." The girl let her small shoulders roll into a shrug. No. She was not out to make any enemies, though one might argue otherwise if they had all really known what she was up to these last few months, alliances forged and plans made and such.
"And I do not care for flattery. I think I know you well enough now to realize sheer indication such as this is worth more than the loveliest of sonnets.." She'd play the poet. Her smile grew, as if she were quite pleased with herself, pleased with this arrangement, if it could've been called such.
She added: "I wish it more than the world." Did she wish the world? She did, at times. Which world? Ah, that was key.
There was a low huff of air from the sandman, what she had labeled as a chuckle, but this was his true laugh, and she'd come to know that eventually. She was already beginning.
"Packmate would care little." His head was tilted to its side as he stared at her, perhaps pondering her many words, as she had a tendency to give such long and winding speeches.
"Good," said the lovely thing in an equally lovely tone. There were things that would remain unsaid, for now, possibly because she had no explanation. She wasn't a creature of logic by far. She felt the pull to this one, and a desire to know, and that knowledge would be filled by flesh and the overpowering emotion that she kept bottled tight, for his sake. Her eyes peered down at him, playful now, catching the glimmer of reflection in his eyes. His silence was fine. She was used to his stoicism.
"I have wanted to tell you forever and ever.." Again, with that strange frame of reference. Forever and ever. It felt so long when one longed so much.
She saw his ears twitch before his laughter resurfaced, and then he said: "And we have brought ourselves into secrets..."
"But I am a creature of secrets. Do you wish to keep these and this between us?"
Yes. You keep them well and they will damn you for it.
As we burn, pretending to fight it
Everyone learns faster on fire
Things took a turn, lost all desire
You live and you burn
You live and...
Like hell we are anxiously waiting
Like hell burning silently strong
Somehow we fell down by the wayside
And somehow this hell is home
Right now, this hell is my home
- Alkaline Trio
Red Dragon Inn
Laughter. Skado's laughter from the chair where he sat. Skado was laughing? Alma had just left them for home, and her words were fresh in Victoria's mind.
I am for home, love, and my eyes will be like moons upon the door hoping to see the knob turn in your hands...
Viki was slow to slip from that stool, but slip she did, and her delicate feet were on the move once more. Her eyes were fierce, as it suddenly dawned on her that she'd never heard the sandman laugh before. Never. Not once. Chuckle, sure. By chuckle, she meant, a brief huff of air, as was his tendency. Not laugh. This was a strange, dry sound.
Her small feet skidded 'round another girl who had been quietly playing with paper animals. Viki could clearly see the images in her mind, the little animal reality the girl had created, and if she got sidetracked, oh, and how easy that was, she wouldn't be able to make this journey.
Viki stopped short at the hearth with small fists clenched at her sides as if she were bound to hit something, anything, but the seer was not one for violence. Instead, the words that poured from her were sharp enough. She'd learned how to arm them by listening to his own short speeches when he was disturbed by her questioning.
"One word from you.. One word." She stammered, trying to pick her words carefully as she crossed her arms. "You tell me it is not impossible, but you.. you.." She tossed her hands into air. "One word from you, and I will not touch her again, or anyone, for that matter. But you do not give me words.." Then, she felt the pull of that distant reality, of the paper animals on the floor, and suddenly felt herself small and among them.
His dark eyes had been watching her the whole time. Finally, when he knew she had finished, he spoke.
"That is because your choices are you own to make, for they make you a being and a mind unto yourself. It is not disapproval of your dear mistress's effect that repels me... it is that she owns your movements. "
Viki felt weak, and thought it best to settle upon the floor, quite near the warmth of the blazing fire. She picked up a lonely lion and let it sit in her palm. Looking away from him now, she spoke directly to the paper animal, her new captive audience. "He gives me paper things but does not speak and he thinks I make poor choices when choices I wish to make are not meant to be received."
Her eyes were brimming with tears, but she looked past the lion and into the flickering flames of the hearth. "The furnace owns the movement of a flame, 'for it ensnares it, overwhelms it, and it has no where else to go."
His rough laugh sounded off again. "But who is David?"
Yes. We've been meaning to ask you about that too.
Viki blinked and set the lion down. It was best he'd join his pride before she flung him into the fire. She wasn't one for fits, but she was related to Tara.
"A man whose movements are owned by another. One I have not seen in weeks." By another, she meant Talomar of course, but in truth, she held no malice towards the man. She did not agree with or entirely understand their business transactions, and in truth she hadn't seen David for weeks. That was his fault, and that was her fault, and perhaps he heard rumors of her affair with Alma.
C'est la vie.
Viki wasn't meant to be in a monogamous relationship anyway. She'd tell herself it was her nature, later on, when the lingering guilt caught up to her. Then perhaps her flickering consciousness would pull her into a whole new plane, and she wouldn't have to deal with any of these problems.
And Amthy was dead. She couldn't go home and face Tara with the secret knowledge of her true murderer. She couldn't go home and face David if he was even still there at all. She just couldn't go home at all.
She turned her head, absently, to look at Skado, though she knew it probably made no difference to meet his gaze.
"One word from you.." Her voice was softer, as if she had just surrendered, and no longer did her blood boil as they ran their chosen courses. "I meant to say, one word to offer, and not to direct."
His reaction was much like the calm before a violent storm. His silence seemed to stretch for a small lifetime, and although he showed nothing in his face or his eyes, perhaps something raged within.
"I am not a maker of choice... but the choice is there, if you wish it."
It was though something had struck her then, though it was not painful. In an instant, she was on her feet, though the movement was quite fluid, and it took a moment to realize how she had done it, as it seemed almost.. unnatural. Then, she made an elegant stride, but she was quiet still. Her eyes said enough. Little tears still clung to their very corners, perhaps evidence of her affection? She rounded the chair where he perched until her knees met the armed cushion, and she hovered just above him.
"I wish it."
"I am not so full of summer flattery as your tweed woman... and I do have mate." He was still as she killed the distance between them.
"I do not care about you're having of a mate, unless she cares otherwise." The girl let her small shoulders roll into a shrug. No. She was not out to make any enemies, though one might argue otherwise if they had all really known what she was up to these last few months, alliances forged and plans made and such.
"And I do not care for flattery. I think I know you well enough now to realize sheer indication such as this is worth more than the loveliest of sonnets.." She'd play the poet. Her smile grew, as if she were quite pleased with herself, pleased with this arrangement, if it could've been called such.
She added: "I wish it more than the world." Did she wish the world? She did, at times. Which world? Ah, that was key.
There was a low huff of air from the sandman, what she had labeled as a chuckle, but this was his true laugh, and she'd come to know that eventually. She was already beginning.
"Packmate would care little." His head was tilted to its side as he stared at her, perhaps pondering her many words, as she had a tendency to give such long and winding speeches.
"Good," said the lovely thing in an equally lovely tone. There were things that would remain unsaid, for now, possibly because she had no explanation. She wasn't a creature of logic by far. She felt the pull to this one, and a desire to know, and that knowledge would be filled by flesh and the overpowering emotion that she kept bottled tight, for his sake. Her eyes peered down at him, playful now, catching the glimmer of reflection in his eyes. His silence was fine. She was used to his stoicism.
"I have wanted to tell you forever and ever.." Again, with that strange frame of reference. Forever and ever. It felt so long when one longed so much.
She saw his ears twitch before his laughter resurfaced, and then he said: "And we have brought ourselves into secrets..."
"But I am a creature of secrets. Do you wish to keep these and this between us?"
Yes. You keep them well and they will damn you for it.