If I could wake up in a different place, at a different time, could I wake up as a different person?
~ Chuck Palahniuk, Fight Club, Chapter 3

Would you like a little more tea?
Well, I haven't had any yet, so I can't very well take more.
Ah, you mean you can't very well take less.
Yes. You can always take more than nothing.
~ Alice in Wonderland

It was cold, but like a moth drawn to a flame, there was no stopping the dance once it had started. Mud and soot clung to now tattered pink flannel and clumped in verdant locks as they swept across the ground and little fingers dug determinedly into the rubble. A round of porcelain poked up through the grit. The body was broken and badly chipped, but the handle and part of the bowl were still intact. A grubby digit wormed through the loop, and the broken bit of ceramic dangled from it.

It was time for tea.

She didn?t seem to register that the clubhouse was in ruins, nor that someone had started to rebuild it. The varying stages of decay and development complimented each other in her airy little head. What she did realize was that it was tea time, yet she didn?t have enough cups. Thrusting out her tongue to curl over her upper lip, she wriggled her fingers back into the mud, and searched for any other cups that might have survived. Dirt and splintered wood and ceramic pushed up under her nails and into her tender fingers, but she didn?t seem put-off by the sensation. If anything, the green-haired, pink-clad girl was completely disconnected from her surroundings, save that she was looking for her tea service.

Amthy hung on every word and movement the diminutive redhead made. Her world, for the moment, was no bigger than the plot of dirt she had been digging in, and Tara. It was something her airy little self had been able to cling to. She didn't even remember how she got to the clubhouse. A part of her just said that was where she was. She didn't even know how long she had been digging. It could have been minutes, or hours. It was all the same to her.

It went without saying that she didn't notice the moment that Tara wove the illusion, but she did notice when it was done. It helped that Tara pointed out her playthings, all pretty and ready for the day(evening)'s festivities. The nymphy-pix was waking up, and the fog that clouded her vision had begun to melt away.

Gasping in delight, she let her broken cup she held fall from her grip. It was probably the one Jewell had stepped on! That would explain why it was in such a woeful state. "How silly of me," she gushed to Tara with only a hint of embarrassment. "I do enjoy a garden party, don't you, Tara? The night makes everything look so pretty. I hope it doesn't rain. Though, I'm sure Jewell would like it if it did." She rambled excitedly. "Do you think we can get the slickers out just in case?"

"Sweet Pea!" Amthy squeaked when Jewell made her presence known. The Water Fae was infinitely more interesting than puzzling over how she'd missed seeing the slickers. "I think it might rain. Did you do something different with your hair?" She said with continued excitement and waved her hands up and down between them. If Jewell was under-dressed, Amthy was hardly dressing in her muddy pajamas! "I think you look lovely. That dress makes you look very perky."

Toddling in closer to Jewell, she gave her fellow guildie a quick 'mwah' in the way of bisous to each cheek. "SitSitSit, it feels like an age since we've sat and talked." She confided to both Jewell and Tara as she sank down and sat on the muddy ground oblivious still to the mental manipulations that shielded the ruins from her awareness.

Amthy tipped her head quizzically to one side and touched a finger to her cheek. "Tea?" She asked as she then reached out to the imaginary tea pot and grasped its handle as if it had weight in the material world.

Sitting up straighter in her 'seat,' Amthy tipped the imaginary tea pot to fill Jewell's likewise imaginary tea cup three-quarters of the way full. "Cream or sugar?" She asked with a bat of her lashes as she moved on to fill a cup for herself and another for Tara. "I was thinking tha' we haven' had any guild business lately. How about a bake sale?" The tea-pot-that-wasn't was set back on the table top (which also wasn't).

Her lips thinned into a thoughtful line as she lifted up her cup. How could she have worried that they wouldn't have any tea? There was plenty of it! The idea made her head swim and her stomach flip uncomfortably. As she tipped up her cup to sip on the make-believe tea, she noticed something. Namely, she noticed how muddy her hand was! "How did I get so dirty?" She asked with open curiosity to her companions.

Frozen Caveman is a little confused.

Okay, let us back track then. Right, so you were in your new cave in the woods, which is very homey by the way. I really like what you did with it, and that bone furniture! you have talent. Not to mention the cave paintings. Killing mammoth? Thats what you did back then right? Very realistic, felt like I was there. No, seriously. I wouldn't lie about art. It is very good. No. I am not just saying that. I like it!

Right. Where were we? Oh yes, so you were in the cave fixing the place up and you heard a noise? Voices? Same difference. So you went to check and then what? Things appear? What kind of things? Buliding and plates, oh that is a likely story, and I suppose a person could survive lifetimes frozen in a block of ice. Oh thats right, they can.

To get to the bottom of this "mystery" of yours I guess I will need to find a better source. What about those three over there? Yes, let us go ask them. Though be weary, they could be a pride and you know what happens when you walk up on one of those? No? Think Mutual of Ohmaha. Picking on the ribs afterwards. Now lets go, and why are you wearing a green slicker that is about twenty sizes too small for you? Oh, that just appeard too did it?

"Frozen Caveman. Love!" Lumbering over to a stop in front of the three harpies and sticking a finger up his nose in greeting. The other hand gives an enthusiastic thumbs up. Kimchee!

"Love!" Kneeling down so he can get closer and stick his finger in their noses now, not wanting them to think him rude.

Amthy was puzzled. Now, it was well known that the airy nymph had a woefully short attention span, and now it had just become that much shorter. Vague recollections of digging bubbled up as she listened to the ideas about mud wrestling and killing old men with the sight of their wet, naked bodies beneath the moonlight. Memories that seemed out of place with the current setting. Luckily, she was distracted from true thought by the arrival of a new guest. It was a tea party, afterall, and guests were to be expected!

Apparently, however, their gentleman caller was not aware that while he could pick his friends and his nose, he just couldn't pick his friend's nose. Amthy's tsavorite green eyes widened in shock and she squawked and flapped her hands like little wings on either side of her.

"Aiiieeee~!" She squealed as the apples of her cheeks stained a fetching granny smith green. Not a breath afterward, the olivine-haired nymphy-pix scrambled wildly closer to Tara. "H-h-he put his boogers in Jewell's nose!" Boy, she was scandalized and it showed. Her eyes about popped out of her head when he moved onto Tara, and like a cat escaping a bath, she scrambled to put Viki between herself and the well-used finger.

Viki? Her confusion was enough to calm her down. "Where did you come from?" Curiosity aroused as she took the blossom, cooing and crooning over the hue. A color that she fancied accented her spring-green loveliness. Ever mercurial, Amthy's befuddlement eased right into complete and total glee. "Oh, thanking you!" She gasped before promptly trying to bless Viki's cheek with a kiss.

These little parties always seemed to get out of control rather quickly. The first time it had been poison marbles and Kina getting hurt; the second time she remembered some type of strip tease going on and then a walk around the grounds with Talomar.

Third time's a charm, right?

All chatter about skinny dipping ceased as the Caveman, Fred II, came into the clearing. "That was...entirely unexpected," especially since he was wearing Amthy's green raincoat? Perhaps he was part of the illusion, that would be extremely clever and a spectacular display of magic on Tara's part.

But no, Fred II was not part of the illusion. Besides the fact that Jewell simply knew better, having a booger-y finger shoved up her nose just dispelled those thoughts. At least she felt a swell of motherly pride at hearing him say "love" before she started absolutely freaking out at having his finger up her nose!

Fortunately, he moved on to accost her friend and she could bat at her own nose with her fingers to try and rid of that finger-up-your-nose feeling. Having a flower delivered to her by the beautiful Viki helped. "Tanks," her voice was nasal-fied as she pinched her nose to ensure that no other fingers would be shoved up there. Amthy's bird-like reaction? Background noise to her own distress at her nose being violated!

Mwah!

Amthy smacked her lips pertly against Viki's cheek. Smiling as she turned to look over at the other tea-party-goers. "Yes, the tea is very good," she said earnestly to the caveman-ish looking fellow. Oh, sure, the tea was make believe, and wasn't likely to be thirst quenching. Tucking her flower into her mud tangled hair as she hummed, Amthy basked in the feeling of entertaining. It was a joy to her.

"Would anyone like a piece of pie?" She asked politely. It wasn't just your ordinary run-of-the-mill imaginary pie. No, sir, it was genuine mud pie with little bits of building debris and twigs sticking out of the amoebic black sludge. All thoughts of nose invasion and traveling boogers forgotten as she offered the first serving of sludge to the caveman. He was their guest (more so than the rest of the Harpies and it helped that he was a male), and as a hostess, she had to see to his comfort first.

Amthy had just finished serving the rest of the 'pie' when she noticed something. She couldn't help but stare. He actually ate the pie. No one ever ate anything at the tea party (nor did they actually drink anything!), but the caveman-ish man was new.

Actually, she found it kind of funny in an endearing sort of way and she couldn't help but giggle girlishly. Her delight spilled from her lips and her bright eyes danced with mischief and merriment, and without another thought to judge the merits of her actions, she leaned in and blessed the caveman's cheek with a smooch.

"Mwah!" She smacked and wound her arms around one of his as her lashes lowered coquettishly. "Wha's your name?" Leaning around him a little, she listened to Tara. She had no idea that Tara could say so much with so little! To her it sounded like gibberish. Maybe it was a secret language?

"I think that's a splendid idea!" She gushed excitedly. "Caveman, Zen Love Frozen Tea?" She repeated Tara's words back to the caveman. "I actually think frozen tea is very yummilicious, though I think the proper name for it is Iced Tea."

The seer took her slice of pie with a lopsided smile and a peculiar stare. She couldn't help it. Amthy was alive, electric and alive. She was warm to the touch, too. Viki took her temperature the minute the Pix's lips met the seer's cheek.

But before she could gather her thoughts, they scattered everywhere. Some of them took the shape of bright pink elephants that lounged near the construction site. Others melted into grassy earth beneath their feet. The last of them were gobbled up on Frozen Caveman the minute he began to devour the pie.

Viki's eyes tumbled into her own dish just as Tara began to talk of her World Takeover Army. Was this a good idea? The seer craned her neck and lowered her head to the hearty slice of mudpie, awaiting instructions.

I have something that will take your mind off the pain of eating that pie and that twig now lodged in your throat. Yes! Yes! I know it hurts but suck it up. Here, have some of this tea, it will help with the twig. Now listen, heres what I was thinking. Are you listening? Okay, picture this. We could have like four angels, no no, in this case, four harpies plus you as the fifth angel, or man-harpie if you prefer. Then there will be this disembodied voice, for now we will call him Charlie, and he will give us crimes to solve. What do you think? Pretty good right?

Would you like to be general in a World Takeover Army? Oh boy would we! Talk about the perfect excuse to wear a sash and smoke a pipe. You could make a key decision to wipe out a whole world of people, but if you are wearing a sash and puffing on a nice tobacco pipe, you are making a statement. Not to mention the travel and the friends you will make. Remember when you took over the world that one time? Sure I know it was only you and your world was only twenty by twenty feet due to all the ice, but you were a great ruler and I'm not just blowing smoke up your ass.

"Frozen Caveman, frozen cave, man." Oh, nice touch. Giving a salute instead of the thumbs up. Very professional. This will look great on the resume.

My goodness! Are you blushing? I do believe you are blushing! You look just like you did after you melted from that block of ice, a cherry flavored popsicle. I mean come on, one kiss on the cheek and holding onto your arm and all of a sudden you are glowing red. I mean sure, when she looks at through the eyelashes like that and....and....and....what? Yes, of course, your name. Tell her your name.

"Frozen Caveman! Frozen Caveman! Frozen Caveman!" Yeah, thats a good idea, why not say your name a few more times in case she didn't get it the first hundred. Hell, just asked for some more pie genius. "Frozen Caveman?"

Well atleast impress them with the new word you have been practicing. Okay, ready? Now turn to Jewell, flash one of the those freaky white smiles and say it: Boom!

"Frozen!" Thumbs way up. Kimchee! Boom! "Frozen!" Claps! Yay! Boom! "Frozen!"

Amthy very nearly swooned listening to the caveman-ish looking fellow, Fred. "Frozen Caveman?" The 'r' in Frozen was rolled when she said it. Color spotted high on her cheeks and her lashes brushed downward as she swayed on her feet, further against Fred. Before she could completely surrender to her fit Tara's observation about her pie caught her attention and snapped her out of it.

Fanning a hand against her face for a moment before she pat her hand to her chest and exhaled heavily. "Iffin you wan' I can put more sugar in yours, Tara." Her lips puckered into fishy faces as she looked about for more 'sugar' to put in Tara's mud pie, in this case 'sugar' happened to be pebbles and flower petals. As she looked for more things to poke into Tara's pie, Amthy drifted away from 'Fred' and started to crawl around on the ground.

What happened? Did you black out? You did. You did! You blacked out and now I can?t see. I told you that the raincoat was to small, but did you listen? No. Oh, it was the pie on your thinking? Yeah, I guess I can see that. More the twig than the pie though. It?s still lodged in there then? That does sound painful. Did you try and wash it down with any tea? Well, if I could see I would pour you a cup, or I mean, if you could see you would pour me a cup. Wait. It is very confusing being you, your brain must hurt all the time.

Hold up. Listen! Did you hear that? Shh! Shhhh! I have my hand up, that means be quiet. Well I forgot you couldn?t see. Sorry. Just so you know, my hand is up right now. Now listen up, somebody smart once said when you lose one sense, the others adjust, become stronger. I have the ears of a prairie dog right now, keen, very keen. Someone is moving, and if I am not mistaken or being mislead by my heightened senses, deluxe, they are very close to you. I would go as far as to say they right next to you. Hold on?I hear something, a voice. It is female but I can?t quite?wait, hold on?.something about sugar, that?s all I could make out. Maybe you should just open your eyes and look. Double thumbs up right back at you Jewell. Love. Barry White.....loooooove.

?Zen. Caveman Zen.? I get what Viki was saying about you not needing to use the word boom since you are already a freak of nature and when you lumber you already go boom, but still, it is a fun word and very ironical. Ironic? I will explain later, now you need to stop clapping and wipe that goofy grin off your face before you blind them too. Get up and follow, it looks like there might be trouble at the old mill.

?Frozen Caveman!? Lumber. Boom. Boom. Boom.

"Bit you?" Viki's eyes grew wide, but before she could react further, Tara drew her close. For such a small person, her cousin had enormous strength. The seer was always being tugged this way or that.

"Perhaps it is one of those bugses.." Her nose wrinkled at the thought, and off-blue eyes fell to the muck beneath her feet.

"Empress! Do take care and tae watch for all the gnashing pointed teeth the bugses might have." She curled her hands on either side of her mouth, directing the sound of her singsong voice as she called out to Jewell.

"Me?" She squeaked out.

There she was, crawling around on the muddy ground ruining her clothes and her best friend was pushing her and telling her to kill bugs! Not only any bugs, evil-biting bugs!

To add insult to injury, Viki chimed in and encouraged her...the girlish Empress...to go kill these beastly bugs. This was like a mutiny even though she wasn't their leader. Maybe they were getting jealous, trying to kill her off before she became too much of a threat. She sent a glance to Tara and Viki, trying to feel out their intentions. Amthy was obviously innocent since she had been dead until that evening.

Looking between those two traitors, she caught her savior out of the corner of her eye. Yes, he splashed some mud on her but he had saved her the duty of crushing the bugs. She LOVED the Frozen Caveman! To show this devotion, she jumped off the ground and wrapped his arm up in a hug, "Thank you! You're the only one..besides Amthy..that loves me!"

While everyone else was busy stomping about and dealing with man-eating bugs, Amthy continued to crawl away from the glamoured tea party on her search for 'sugar' to put in Tara's pie. Rumble was poked around and dirt clots turned over as she searched for the elusive ingredient that would make Tara's mud pie so delicious, the tiny terror of a vampire wouldn't be able to resist it. In her quest, several items were considered and discarded, each discovery took her further and further away from the party-goers.

Amthy, always an airy creature, was even more so than usual. "Will you get this, Tara?" Amthy called back, waving a shard of pottery back to her idol. "'s a pretty shade of...." She paused a moment to contemplate the color. "I s'pose brown, but tha' doesn' sound nearly romantic enough. How 'bout cinnamon? Or is it too orange?"

It was then she realized that she had wandered too far, and turning about, she retraced her crawl back toward the group. She didn't quite make it due largely to the sight the caveman-ish fellow presented. Many a time she had prayed to any divine creature that would listen for the ground to swallow her whole. Never in all her days did she actually expect to see it happen to anyone.

"Oh MY gosh!" She squawked. "The ground is eating him ALIVE!" Amthy wasn't one to handle an emergency well. Wringing her hands, she was much like a chicken recently bereft of its head. She started to go one direction and changed her mind and went the other before lunging forward and attempted to grab onto any ol' hairy limb she could--hopefully, that hairy limb belonged to the caveman, she wasn't really paying attention.

The seer was still quite stuck on the situation with the insects. When it was decided that they were dead, she was quite suspicious, so naturally she didn't react quite well when the Caveman fell through the hole.

"It's the bugses again!! They eat up the earth and make it hollow. Even the twisted roots of this tree and that are nau match for 'em." Viki made a good deal of horrible little faces, showing her teeth when she sneered, flat as they were. She would scare the bugs for sure, and then the earth would kindly spit the large man back out.