Sunday, September 2

Violence Filled Thursday!

HEIFER Jewell returned to the Inn Thursday night to a hero's welcome!!! Witnessing the scene, one would think that she had won a baronial ring rather than having just broken out of prison. The patrons of the Inn certainly aren't a crowd much into law and order!!!

AWESOME Alain seemed a bit out of it when he was spotted in the Inn that night. Lassie Cassie was at his side, of course, but Alain only seemed to be interested in talking about her "dear" friend -- Cute Single Erin!!! BURN!!! He was also overheard mentioning a certain DoD-er!!! What a bevel of bodacious beauties Alain has collected!

Word has it that Deadbeat Dad Alex and his HAWTIE harlot, the Other OTHER woman Yami, (who were seen macking on one another in the Inn AGAIN) are THIS close to marriage!!! WHAT?!?! Didn't they start dating last week??? And didn't he JUST break off his relationship with Other woman Lain!!! Whoa! We think D.D. Alex might have lost his marbles!!!

And, by the by, what is Alex doing to these women that gets them so into him??? Of course, he's a good looking guy but this is RIDICULOUS!!! While he was in the Inn flirting and talking about marriage with his new girl, his two old girls were STILL fighting over him!!! HEIFER Jewell and a pajama-clothed Lain were arguing over who "had" Deadbeat Dad Alex. Lain accused Jewell's man of being an "animal" which pissed Jewell off. The man's a vampire and a pirate who refuses to bathe! We think she was being kind! And Jewell in return insulted Lain by throwing it in her face that she doesn't have a man. Tired insult!

We almost don't want to tell you what happened next. It's so sad and pathetic that it should be buried... but we must tell what our sources reported to us.

Lil' Miss Anger Management started the violence as usual. She threw a mug at Lain's head and it went down hill from there. How pathetic is it that they are STILL fighting over Deadbeat Dad Alex??? In fact, when Piper went in to break up the cat fight, she was elbowed in the face!!! Tucker finally had enough and picked up both women like they were sacks of potatoes!!! He threw them BOTH out on their fats butts!!! Ha!!! We HEART Tucker!!!

It seems that Piper will be okay. Eless tended to her and made sure she got an ice pack on her heads. HEIFER Jewell could learn some things from those two ladies -- like dignity and class. We certainly don't expect a lot from HEIFER Jewell any more but this was certainly a low point. We wonder if she's on something!!! And how must her husband feel that she's STILL fighting over Alex???

The adorable Sianna found herself a man MIGHTY quickly upon her return to RhyDin!!! She's been seen spending a good deal of time with a guy named Johnny. They've been spotted sharing meals, holding hands, kissing, blah, blah, blah. We're sure they're already in love and well on their way to marriage and popping out a couple spawn... but we're unimpressed. Sianna needs somebody a bit more spicy! That girl is FIRE HAWT!!!

Lang certainly seems like trouble to us but he keeps drawing the ladies in. We're definitely starting to see a pattern in the type of girls he gives the time of day, though!!! TRASH-tastic Jade and her equally trashy friend Kit attempted to impress Lang with their slutty ways (including corsets, thigh-high boots, and a whip) but he wanted nothing to do with them. GOOD MAN!!! However, he seemed blown away when Wolv's girl, Kaspar, walked through the door. If we were Wolv, we'd keep a CAREFUL eye on that situation!

Thursday night in the Arena??? Everybody knows what that means!!! All the hot ladies get a free groping and a healthy dose of slobber from the P-Imp! Although, there was a TON of dueling, there was little drama to be seen. It seems that many of the duelists were too busy getting ready for the Talon of Redwin Tournament to flirt and insult! Former Talon winner Wyh Not was seen in the rings! The ADORABLE Uriko, who we're sure will do well in the tournament, popped in for a bit as well! A fun, violence filled night was had by all!!!

Tuesday, September 4

We are NOT a Mini-Frank Saturday!

Yummilicious Brian was spotted in the Red Dragon Inn Saturday night chatting about his new little ones. According to what our sources overheard, Jenai is due any day now with their twins!!! How exciting!!! It's nice to see a loving, normal couple amongst all the chaotic relationships that fill this city.

And you'll never guess who our sources spotted walking through the door!!! Miss Mercy!!! That's right. The one and only. My faithful readers will remember that there were a number of fliers posted around town a little less than two months ago declaring her missing!!! And her main man Pelnar was all in a tissy over her disappearance! Well, she's baaaack, folks! And now she's the one looking for Pelnar. Welcome back, Miss Mercy!!! RhyDin missed your fiiiine rear end!!!

Is Deadbeat Dad Alex having second thoughts??? He was seen in a pretty private conversation with the OTHER Woman Lain, his ex-girl. And guess what??? His new girl, OTHER Other Woman Yami, was no where to be found!!! To make matters eve mooooore interesting, the pair was spotted leaving together!!! Man, we LOVE to hate on Alex and his drama is just soooo good for the blog!!! Keep up your pimpalicious ways, D.D. Alex!!!

Evidently, Brale Brother Baker is still attempting to convince people that your Gossip GangSTAR is Mini-Frank Cor and that Mini-Frank Cor is THE Marc Franco. HEIFER Jewell wasn't buying it just as she wasn't buying it when Brale Brother Baker and Brale Brother Reap bagged Mini-Frank Cor up, dyed his hair pink, and dropped him off at Jewell's door. However, Peeeeerfect Piper seemed almost convinced.

We are NOT Mini-Frank Cor. Mini-Frank Cor is NOT the all-powerful, all-knowing, and wondrously handsome Marc Franco! We are hurt and dismayed! Hurt and dismayed, we say!!!

Oh, and by the way, HEIFER Jewell was going around telling people that she's the daughter of a goddess. The reason that this blog entry is so late is that we've been laughing ever since our source reported that she said that!!! We used to totally HEART Jewell. What happened to the classy, modest woman we loved???

Wednesday, September 5

SPOTTED Monday!

We are now proud to present your THIRTEENTH Rhydin edition of the often duplicated yet unequaled --

SPOTTED:

- TRASH-tastic Jade hanging all over her ex Michale. Our sources are saying these two are a couple.... again. Did he not learn the last time??? At least Gabe is smart enough to be done with this woman. Le sigh!

- Delivery Guy Chris who evidently remembered FINALLY how to get to the Inn!!! He was seen chatting with Den Mama Sid who seemed quite upset over losing something. Our sources never did figure out what. However, the commonly held opinion of the night was that it was very disconcerting to see Sid so... off.

- Kaspar and Lang snuggling in the late hours of the night in the Inn. We suppose we can officially say that Wolv is out and Lang is in now!!! This guy smells a bit dirty to us. We're not so sure about this match.

- Rhy, the chick Lang dumped to cuddle with Kaspar, in the Inn earlier in the evening with a new man of her own. She certainly wasn't teary-eyed that night!

- DoD-er Charlie warning HEIFER Jewell to never touch her again!!! We're not huge fans of those dark and deadly types like DoD-er Charlie but we have to totally HEART her for threatening HEIFER Jewell. Charlie also exchanged words with Lydia but it wasn't clear over what the subject matter was about. HAWT!!!

- another dark and deadly type in Raye, chatting up some of the ladies. She's another one that we wouldn't turn our back on after insulting her! She'd slice and dice!!!

- DoD-er Rena seeming a bit under the weather! DoD-er FLAWLESS Koy even stayed out of the rings of the Outback to keep an eye on her. We hear you! A Monday went by without Koy fighting??? No, pigs did not fly. Quite iiiinteresting, though!

- Max fighting Anubis for the Firestar Opal with SUUUUUPER Des (who had her faithful Gav at her side) keeping track of points!!! Max couldn't take down the current Firestar holder and Anubis took the win in two closely fought matches! Congratulations, Anubis!

Sunday, September 9

Back-stabbing Tuesday!

You know what our favorite part of break-ups in RhyDin is? Once both people move on to another, they completely ignore that their ex even exists!!! Love it!!! Lang walked into the Inn Tuesday night while Rhy was being all flirty with her new man (whose name our sources still haven't caught) and neither of them acknowledged the other. Classy!

Has HEIFER Jewell not yet learned to keep her hands to herself??? She was spotted kicking, shoving, and hitting Bad Boy Darren while she was TENDING BAR!!! When is Panther going to send this woman to anger management classes??? Does she have to kill a patron before he does??? Ridiculous! We think that she's the like the little boy on the playground that tugs the little girls' braids. She's totally got a thing for Darren!

The night took a turn for the somber when the darling Miss Mercy told Stephen that her dear Pelnar has passed away recently!!! Our heart breaks for her! She's such a sweetie and that man of her's seemed like a stand-up sort of guy. Stephen didn't even console the dear as he was too busy dealing with his wife's shenanigans. WHATEVER!

Our sources spotted The Gov Kitty!!! She certainly hasn't been seen much but her presence should always be heralded by trumpets and girls throwing flowers!!! Well, we can't do either but we'll sure give a giant "All Hail the Gov!" She was seen with her arm around Yummilicious Alain! Now his womanizing skillz are suuuuper crazy but if he bags a night with The Gov Kitty on top of the women already in his little black book, he is a LEGEND!!!

Our sources claim that Panther came in injured in the late hours of the evening and has his wound tended by The Gov Kitty while Panther's little cutie, S'jira, looked on anxiously. It seems that Panther will be fine but he appeared a bit... disturbed by the incident and had a talk with Alysia about his concerns. Iiiiinteresting! We're dying to know what the pair were discussing!

Lydia and her carpenter hottie Glenn were spotted having a looooong and intimate chat together!!! We knew Lydia was a back-stabbing man-stealer!!! Is she trying to take Glenn from Carley??? CRAZY! Not cool!

Sartan was spotted in the Outback gently turning down the caller on duty Good Boy Cor's advances. We knew that Good Boy Cor was a bit light in the loafers!!! Taneth! Our daaaarling Taneth was seen in the Outback as well, making Cor feel better with a cuddle. She also spent her time cheering for... well, everybody! That's why we HEART Taneth!

Over on Twilight Island, a small crowd gathered to watch as Topaz oversaw Vinny pressing his challenge against Wulfson to see who would be named Archmage! It took three close duels to decide a winner but Wulfson retained his title and will serve as Archmage of the Duel of Magic for another cycle. Congatulations, Wulfson!!!

Monday, September 10

The Powerhouse Tournament!

To celebrate the coming end of the season, the Iron Fists' Chairman held his annual Powerhouse Tournament pitting this season's best of the best against one another! Entrance into the tournament is invitation-only but quite a crowd filled the stands to watch!!!

HEIFER Jewell proved once again that she's not the type you would want your young impressionable daughters around. Innocent, sweet Uriko was questioning her on the damage to her person and Jewell had to explain that she received it by "trying to beat up my ex-husband's ex-girlfriend for saying something awful about my current husband". Le sigh! At least lie to the girl! We hope that Uriko is set enough in her well-mannered ways that the taint of Jewell's ridiculousness does not spread.

Bad Boy Darren took an early exit from the tournament at the hands of Red Orc Brewery owner and mastermind behind Badsider Brew, Jake Thrash!!! Don't feel too bad for Bad Boy Darren. He got one heck of a consolation prize as he spent the night cuddled up with The Gov Kitty!!! While The Gov doesn't duel much herself and was not in IFL this season, she often does her governly duties by showing for these sporting events. Bad Boy Darren and The Gov along with DoD-er Rena were brainstorming ways to get Darren's girl Sugar out of her room at the Inn... which she's evidently been locked in for some time, claiming she doesn't ever want to leave.

There was all sorts of CUTE doing well in the tournament! PiRATe Napoleon kicked MAJOR butt and took names as did energetic Uriko! However, in the end it was FLAWLESS Koy from Team Fist and Kelten from Champions of Mythos who emerged from the pack to battle it out for the newly redesigned Kiowa Belt! FLAWLESS Koy's hubby Man-tastic Matt was there to cheer her on... which we must admit was adorable!

His support was not enough to bring her through the last duel in a long night of fighting. In the end, Kelten took a 5-2 win and became the new belt winner! Congratulations, Kelten!

Monday, September 10

Knock Us Over With A Friday!

Pslyder (yes, we did say Pslyder) and Max were spotted catching up on Friday night. It gets even odder!!! Pslyder and Max were caught catching up in the Red Dragon Inn! We blew your mind, no??? Okay, so maybe not but you do have to admit that Pslyder hasn't been seen in a while and the Inn isn't the first place you'd expect to see the two of them. They reminisced about old times, caught up on the current happenings in the dueling world, and talked about their families! Cute!

The Gov Kitty was later seen introducing herself to Psly. Is it only us that sees these two as major trouble if they spend any time together???

Baker was up to trouble as usual. According to our sources he got a nasty burn but there's no word how he received the nasty wound! DoD-er Eve wandered in just in time to revive Baker with... yep, you guessed it... ale!!! HEIFER Jewell even got over herself long enough to supply Baker with some burn cream but she ruined her good deed by later giving into her MASSIVE ego by introducing herself as "the Empress".

...The Empress of the Buffet Line, maybe.

We HEART Ewan!!! He's delicious! He wised up and got back together with the DIVINE Storm! And he always seems to keep an eye out for lovely little Taneth! Last night he was seen chatting her up in what seemed to be an attempt to keep her out of some brewing melodrama. He gets major props in our book... and not just his fiiiiine rear end!!!

Down in the Inn's basement Arena Friday night, the caller on duty -- Teagan -- had gained quite the crowd!!! But... who wouldn't show if that HAWTIE is on the couch??? She is absolutely SMOKING!!! Chris Graziano sure knows how to hire the cutie callers to appease his mostly male duelers!!!

And you could have knocked us over with a FEATHER when our sources told us who showed up!!! Roland!!! No lie!!! The former baron hasn't been seen in the rings in yeeeeaaars but showed up out of the blue and seems to be back to try his hand at dueling again. G'nort, Jaycy, and Karen were tasked with the task of catching him up on the happenings over the past years... which is certainly a monumental chore!

Wednesday, September 12

One Lucky Saturday!

The lovely Julie was overheard chatting about her often-absent husband with the super manly Tucker Saturday night!!! We certainly can't say she was crying into her tea cup but she didn't seem happy with her new husband's many out-of-town trips. We have our fingers crossed that this one works out but it has the phrase "going down in flames" stamped allllll over it!!!

....And just when we thought we had a handle on the Lang/Kaspar/Rhy/Wolv love web, we're left confused once again! Lang and Rhy were seen having what appeared to be a veeeery intimate conversation Saturday night! Are they back together??? Only time will tell!!!

Whenever we see Lucky, he's always surrounded by beautiful but dangerous women! He must be our kind of guy!!! Saturday night he was spotted with Alysia and the Faaaaabulous Chryrie! This is certainly the type of man that knows how to rooooooll!

Den Mama Sid had at least one twin with her behind the bar Saturday night!!! Darren's absent girlfriend Sugar emerged from her room upstairs to take a shift behind the bar. Darren certainly seemed encouraged to see her out and about! She went about her duties happily but as soon as her shift was over fled back up to her room. Poor girl needs some serious mental help.

We spotted the very even-keeled Charlotte spending a bit of time with the crazed TRASH-tastic Jade. Lordy, we hope that spending time basking in Charlotte's class may rub off on the cleavage-exposing unabashed bed-hopper!!! Charlotte did seem to be giving her a brief stern lecture but Jade did spend the evening in the company of her on-again/off-again boyfriend Michale.

Somebody forgot to lock up the doors to the Duelist Retirement Home Saturday night!!! Not only was Var spotted within the Arena's basement Arena but Xeno was calling matches! There was also a decent helping of HAWTIES with Teagan and Alex present. And, of course, with the hard-hitting HAWTIES comes the man with the ENORMOUS sex drive -- G'nort!

Monday, September 17

Talon of Redwin Tournament!

On Sunday evening, a crowd of ten of the Arena's best up-and-coming duelists gathered to show their stuff in the rings in order to gain the title of "Talon of Redwin" through the Fall months! The Talon of Redwin Tournament is open to all duelers below the rank of Warlord, and is held in a single-elimination style in honor of one of the Arena's most illustrious and well known duelers, Siera Redwin, past Overlord and Baroness of the rings.

The night was full of some of our absolute favorites!!! The RAT-tastic PiRATe Napoleon was present and, ooooh, how we love him! He has completely changed our feelings on rodents as a whole! He fought hard but, unfortunately, could not duel his way into the finals.

Although she did not participate, Alex (the female version) was spotted ringside, enjoying a drink and the matches!!! We think she's delightfully yummy as well! Alex was overheard talking about G'nort's (who she calls Gustavus) libido to Uriko. Alex is getting awwwwfully friendly with the married Baron of the Old Market district!

Rory actually appeared somewhat sane as she and her husband Sartan sat ringside watching the matches. In fact, with Rory sane, the pair were actually pretty cute together!!! Sartan is quite the manly sort of man. He makes us swooooon at his hunkiness!!! Plus, he certainly seems very loyal to his quite clearly half-crazy wife so we must love him all the more!

To make the tournament even MORE interesting, Vinny and HEIFER Jewell were forced to face off against one another!!! If you remember correctly back in May, Vinny gave Jewell a serious beat down, claiming that she wasn't taking the sport seriously enough. This time, however, it was HEIFER Jewell doing the teaching! She walked away from the match the winner. Vinny seemed to want to make nice but Jewell was having NONE of that!!!

This title that has been DOMINATED by women (even though historically the sport has been owned by men) since it's inception. Prior to Sunday night, thirteen tournaments had been fought and from them nine female winners had held the title. Sunday night was the fourteenth tournament and the TENTH time a woman has walked away the winner!!! This cycle it was HEIFER Jewell who took top honors!!!

Congratulations, HEIFER Jewell!!!

Monday, September 17

Don't Resist the Divine Tuesday!

We wonder how Darkmere felt to see Bloody Psycho Sera moving on so quickly!!! We're telling you, men looooove this girl!!! Tuesday night she was spotted at the bar with a new guy named Brian (not the Ravenlock variety). He's a bit of a hottie and was clearly interested in getting to know her better. We HEART that she has her old body back! We HEART that she has her attitude back! And we HEART that she's stealing the boys' hearts once again!

Despite recently losing her Pelnar, Mercy is doing her best to keep an upbeat attitude. She was overheard stating that there was no reason for moping. We LOVE strong women who can keep their head up in the face of adversity!!! We wish Mercy the best!!!

Sianna set a romantic mood in the Inn with her beautiful lute. It was a mood that Ewan seemed to take advantage of!!! He's never one for P.D.A. but even he cannot RESIST the DIVINE Storm. He was seen quite nearly cuddling her in public. And why not??? She's to diiiiie for! These two are so steamy HAWT!

Alysia was in the Inn and up to her usual trouble!!! And, man, do we love her for it!!! In fact, she somehow convinced Guthorm to start stripping in the bar! He didn't get very far but it was a great show while it lasted. WORK IT, BOY!!!

Poor little bubble-gum blonde Sugar was quite a mess Tuesday night!!! She was beside herself when the stories started coming out of how exactly she had spent the previous night. It seems she has some sort of "alcohol allergy" that turns her into a raging slut every time she drinks. Honey, that's EVERY woman!!!

Uriko was in the Outback losing a piece of her innocence to G'nort as he accurately guessed the type of underwear she was wearing. He also advised her of a woman's power to turn boys into men. Le sigh. G'nort should join the list of people that includes The Gov Kitty of people who should not be allowed to be around impressionable and innocent minds!!!

Wednesday, September 19

Cue The Drooling Thursday!

The OTHER other woman Yami sure had Deadbeat Dad Alex an interesting shade of red Thursday night. It seems that he was slightly embarrassed by their new nickname for him -- Lexibear. Wow. They just snipped his manhood right off with that one, huh? Thanks, but no thanks, ladies. We like our nickname for him better!!!

We have a new name for our list of people that should not be allowed around impressionable minds -- Bad Boy Darren. He was spotted at the bar chatting up adorable little Carley. Speaking of Carley, we believe she may be our soul mate!!! Cute, perky, and a fan of the Gossip GangSTAR!!! She was overheard talking about her love for yours truly. Le sigh! LOVE HER!!!

One of our FAVORITE tenders was on duty -- Tucker!!! Cue the droooooling! He fixed the lovely Charlotte a drink while HEIFER Jewell went on and on about what a shameless flirt she is. Is that really something a married woman should be admitting to??? She was also heard making some choice comments regarding how she really didn't care if her husband showed up that night in the Inn or not!!! TROUBLE IN PARADISE??? We feel the shelf life on this marriage expiring quickly!

Our sources overheard naive Brandon having a discussion about his new girl (whose name we unfortunately missed) with HEIFER Jewell, Eless, and Icer. We do hope that if he was looking for relationship advice her took it from the latter two women. HEIFER Jewell also attempted to explain the idea of lust to him. She certainly seems to be an expert on lust. Perhaps she can also explain to him how one may confuse lust with love!!! Man, do we LOVE to hate on her!!! Pour us another cup of Hater-ade, baby!

Once Tucker's shift was over, he was spotted having a drink with Eless!!! Wowzer!!! What we wouldn't give to see THAT coupling?!?! They engaged in some quiet conversation and Tucker seemed awfully attentive until.... Connar walked through the door! If you remember correctly, Eless and Connar were seen getting cozy a couple months back but he hasn't been seen in some time. WHAT WILL ELESS DO?!?! Will she choose the smooth-talking but absent Connar or the gentle giant Tucker???

Stitch certainly seems to have quite the temper but we HEART the drama it produces!!! In the late hours, he was overheard having a loud argument with Bad Boy Darren over their common friend Cute Single Erin!!! Does Darren have a thing for Cute Single Erin??? Inquiring minds NEED to know. Darren told him to take the conversation outside while a frustrated Lydia attempted to defuse the situation. Iiiinteresting.

Xeno was overheard down in the Inn's basement Arena suggesting that what we all assumed was retirement may have simply been a break. It seems that Cletus surpassing his record in number of times having held the Overlord title may have encouraged Xeno to brush off a bit of rust!!! What we wouldn't GIVE to see a Cletus vs Xeno showdown for the Overlord title!!! Can you imagine the hype???

Tareth's last visit to RhyDin left us wondering if he and his ex Charlie were indeed on for a reunion. Well, all questions were answered Thursday night when Tareth was spotted on a return visit. The dangerous DoD-er was actually spotted ON THE LAP of her former CDR teammate!!! And, no doubt about the status of this reunion, the pair was spotted leaving together later that night.

A story beneath the basement in the Annex, a small crowd gathered to watch Maria defended the Barony of Battlefield Park against Max!!! With SUUUUPER Des calling the match, Maria choose a single match format against her opponent. As neither duelist is particularly well liked (as they are two of the most OBNOXIOUS people alive), the cheering was at a minimal. However, Maria's ass seemed to be a fan favorite and it was she who was able to take a solid win for her first defense.

Congratulations to Maria!!!

Friday, September 21

Randy Saturday!

We used to think that Sianna was a sweet-natured, classy young lady. Man, were we WRONG!!! Instead of ignoring Brale Brother Baker and Bad Boy Darren on Saturday evening in the Red Dragon Inn, she engaged them in a round of insults and then ended the confrontation by dumping her drink over their heads after they spent a couple minutes oogling her in a very.... brazen manner! Her actions might have been over the top and a littl left of cultured.... but we LOVE IT!!! Hilarious!!!

As if the Inn wasn't full of enough troublesome men, Randy Robert and Good Boy Cor showed up!!! Good Boy Cor seemed to have important news for Randy Robert and Brale Brother Baker. However, Randy Robert and Bad Boy Darren were only interested in checking out the DIVINE Storm!!! Storm's way of dealing with the boys (by ignoring them) was much less.... dramatic but we can't love her any less for it.

Storm was too occupied with Edible Ewan to even pay the boys much mind!!! And who wouldn't be??? He's totally droooooolable!

Sunday, September 23

Overheard Around Town!

- "What do you say we go do some math? Add a bed.. subtract our clothes, divide my legs and multiply?" Blonde bubble gum popping Sugar after Darren fooled her into drinking alcohol. WOWZER, we love that pick-up line!!!

- "I don't really anticipate that you could be much rougher with me than she is. I mean, unless you spew sulfer and brimstone when you climax, there's nothing I wouldn't be able to handle." G'nort after The Gov Kitty informed him that he couldn't handle her in bed.

- "I learned from television and a lack of parental supervision like a normal child." That explains a lot about our DoD-er Evie.

- "What's with the influx of cat people lately? Did they hear about Napoleon and send out a hunting expedition?" Sartan declared in the Outback!

- "I can make boys become men? Wow! That seems like quite an accomplishment. Better then the old Indian rituals they had to go through..you know..go out into the woods, kill and eat a whole bear to become a man." Uriko's take on the power of virginity.

- "Girls are nothing but trouble. Especially the pretty ones." DoS Supervisor Chris shoots us another nugget of knowledge!

- "Sweet...full on Scathlesbianism..." We HEART Baker's new word. Scathlesbianism. Fantastic!

- "I may not be Wilma, but I can still make your bedrock." Yeeeep, and another pick-up line courtesy of Sugar. This one was directed towards Brandon. LOVE IT!

- "STAMPEDE!!!!!" Darren calling out when HEIFER Jewell was on the mooooove.

- "Honey ye mus' nae know who ye be talkin' tae...women must pay me fer me attentions...I am after all Captain Robert One foot Kidd...an' ye will notice I dun 'ave a peg leg." Robert announced to his sister-in-law.

Monday, September 24

ZOMBIE Tuesday!

In the early hours of Tuesday night DoD-er Rena was overheard telling Darren that she has to make a trip back to Boy Toy Val's homeland. Did Val and Rena break up and now she realizes what a mistake it was and has to go find him??? We're dying to know what's going on here but Rena seems to be quite tight-lipped about whatever it is. Inquiring minds what to know, Rena!

Our sources spotted a new little joy in Risa! We're told she IS geek chic! And, oh how we love geek chic! DORKS RULE!!! She snorts when she laughs. She makes video game references in conversation. And she's absolutely hilarious. What a breath of fresh air this girl is! Automatically one of our newest favorites!

Then the ZOMBIE INFESTATION struck the Inn! One heck of a fight broke out between the tenders and the impending zombies. For once, HEFIER Jewell's anger management and Lassie Cassie's trigger happiness came in handy!!! The pair helped battle back the strange intruders.... who from time to time broke out in a break dancing time out.

Amid all the chaos, love emerged! .....And we're still squealing like a fan boy! Connar and Eless were seen quite cozy and having a wonderfully intimate conversation. Unfortunately, we do NOT knowing what they were discussing because they were speaking French!!! Le sigh. While we may not be an expert in French, we are an expert in body language and, let us tell you, those two are SCREAMING "love birds"!!!

The banks of Twilight Island and the confines of the Outback were quite quiet Tuesday night according to our sources. However, the did report back that the lizard-man Bran was on the Island singing up a storm! That sounds like something somebody should sell tickets to!

Monday, September 24

Pirates and Zombies Thursday!

TRASH-tastic Jade was seen Thursday night toting around a baby in the Red Dragon Inn and claiming it was her own. Lord. We really just don't even know where to begin so we'll pretend as if we didn't hear that disturbing news.

A baby on her hip certainly didn't stop her from flirting with every man in the Inn. She had her eyes on Lang, who seems to be a popular one with the ladies, until his damsel Rhy strutted her stuff on in. Lang had little time for the feminine attentions as he was busy using his vast collection of weapons to keep the zombies at bay.

Rhy's certainly HAWT but the damsel in distress act doesn't light our fire. What does light our fire??? The next woman that walked through the door. The Gov Kitty came in heavily armed and with an ammo belt around her waist. Now that is HAWT!!!

Kitty joined forces with Lang in attempting to keep the zombies at bay. In fact, the pair had a marvelous idea!!! They took The Stew out of the kitchen and threw it out the window on the zombies! The pair then began boarding up the windows!!! It's quick thinkers like Lang and Kitty that helped save lives during this infestation. THEY ARE HEROES!!!

Everybody was certainly in need of a stiff drink by the time Tucker fought his way through the undead horde. He helped Kitty and Lang board up windows before taking his shift behind the bar which included serving his drink of the day -- the Flaming Zombie!!! How yummy is Tucker??? He's our kind of hero!!!

Speaking of heroes, a tired and dusty Harry appeared later in the evening to pick up sandwiches for the crew working with him to rebuild the Dockside district. Maia arrived shortly after and Harry immediately wrapped his arms around the standoffish beauty. Certainly not worthy of pairing them together, right? Well, perhaps if that was the only incident but our sources are belatedly reporting back to us that these two have been seen in each other's company quite a bit in recent weeks.... and they seem to be a bit more than buddies. Another odd coupling but certainly one to watch out for!!!

Underground seemed the place to go to avoid zombies! The Inn's basement Arena was packed full of people who seemed to be avoiding the infestation! And, in fact, they were having a PARTY!!! The crazy Imp was hosting "Talk Like A Pirate" night with dueling, costumes, and OF COURSE Stephen!!! Because what is Talk Like A Pirate night without an unwashed, ill-tempered pirate???

Hilariousness ensued!!! We cannot wait for the next "Talk Like A Pirate" dueling night!!!

Monday, September 24

Cross Dressing Saturday!

Yuuuuummmm! SMASHING Issy made our night Saturday night by strutting her HAWT stuff around the Red Dragon Inn! How we love her! She downed some whiskey while chatting with TRASH-tastic Jade. We'd need alcohol too to get through a conversation with her!!!

Frat Boy Matt was also strutting his stuff -- in a dress, stiletto heels, a blonde wig and some seriously horrendous make-up! He certainly doesn't make a pretty woman!!! Evidently Matt had lost a bet to Frat Boy Gage who was present and seemingly quite pleased with his work. Gage was overheard trying to convince Matt to take his hairy legs for a wax. We don't even think that could help make those hairy legs more appealing in a dress.

Remember how we were just wondering how Lang gets so much female attention??? Well, our sources spotted him spending time with yet ANOTHER hottie Saturday night. He was seen discussing the rebuilding situation with the lovely Kacey. She definitely has potential!!!

The Arena was pretty dead Saturday night. Perhaps after fighting zombies all week long, people were tuckered out on violence. With no action in the Arena, some of the Arena's regulars were seen hanging out in the Inn. DoD-er Rena was seen chatting with a fellow warlord in Rand. They certainly seemed chummy and left us wondering if Rand is Boy Toy Val's replacement! They discussed their views on the current political state of the Duel of Swords and the need to reinvigorate the barons! How we'd love to see them lead that charge!!!

...And just when you thought you were surprised to the degree that Maia seems to have gone public with her relationship with Harry, she surprises us again! She was seen looking all sorts of snuggly with him Saturday night as the crowd thinned out. We're starting to be swayed towards thinking this pairing might actually be seriously HAWT!

Friday, September 28

Panther's Claw Tournament!!!

Typically we start our blogs with the drama that took place in the Red Dragon Inn as it tends to be the biggest source of juicy gossip. However, Monday night it was not the Inn but the Outback that seemed to be the epicenter of a serious DRAMA EARTHQUAKE!!!

In the midst of the cycle's Panther's Claw Tournament being overseen by SUUUUPER Des, some MAJOR break-up action went down. Evidently cute, peppy Sugar saw the Gossip GangSTAR's latest blog which mentioned that her man Bad Boy Darren (and, man, has he earned that moniker now!) went up to the room of Cute Single Erin!!! Sugar was LIVID!!!

She stormed into the Outback and laid into Erin while her sister Spice begged her to stop. It seems that Sugar's anger was wrecking havoc on the magical bond the twins share. Darren stood aside and watched shamefully as Sugar laid one heck of a curse on Erin and then a similar one on Bad Boy Darren. Both Cute Single Erin and Bad Boy Darren looked like they wanted to crawl under a rock and die!

In the middle of this, G'naughty G'nort (who was a participant in the tournament) decided to stick his big nose into the drama. He was overheard calling Sugar a "banshee"! WHATEVER!!! Spice didn't take too kindly to the insults against her sister and under the influence of that magic, she hauled off and punched G'nort!!! GOOD FOR HER!!! Unfortunately, he decided to hit her back. WHAT A GIANT IDIOT! Thankfully, Mini Frank Cor (who evidently is still dating the dark-haired twin) stepped in to pull Spice away which seemed to help bring her back under control.

Needless to say Bad Boy Darren and Sweet Sugar are OVER!!! And this break-up supersedes even the MARVELOUSLY DRAMATIC fall-out of Bloody Psycho Sera and her Dameon. This gets an immediate spot in our countdown of BEST BREAK-UPS EVAR!!!

....no, the drama didn't stop there either!

For some odd reason, Unwashed Pirate Stephen and HEIFER Jewell, who were there to watch the tournament but spent most of their time threatening to take their clothes off, got into it withG'naughty G'nort. G'nort was evidently making all sorts of friends. Stephen lunges at G'nort but somehow tackled Good Boy Cor instead. We LOVED to see HEIFER Jewell and G'naughty G'nort go toe-to-toe!!! The battle of RhyDin's Biggest Ego Whore!

In the midst of it all, Snaggle-toothed Cassie sat and whined the tune of "Why can't we all just get along?"

SUUUUPER Des was evidently too busy running around the Outback attempting to track down a thief to stop the out of ring antics. See, she really is a super hero! And the Outback's Big Boss Man-tastic Matt also seemed uninterested in the drama. He was evidently too busy planning his new business with his equally Man-tastic new partner Sartan and avoiding looks of DEATH from his new wife FLAWLESS Koy... who is evidently NOT at all happy about her husband's new business venture.

Speaking of Sartan, our sources have FINALLY confirmed to us that he is finally admitting that there is something wrong with his wife Rory. The exact details are vague but she has evidently suffered some sort of ailment and her condition is permanent. We hear that he has threatened violence against whomever spreads rumors of her, uh, disability. We're not scared!!! Come and get it, big boy!!! We like it rough!!!

Our sources also have reported back to us that there was some sort of girl-on-girl action between Alex (the girl version) and Pirate-Girl Teagan!!! We, unfortunately, have no confirmation of this report and, even more sadly, no photographic evidence. Le sigh!

Oh, and there was dueling among all this chaos as well!!! G'naughty G'nort evidently stopped causing problems long enough to make it into the final round but he was stopped from taking the title by DoD-er Rena!!! And guess what??? DoD-er Rena's man was STILL not present. What's up with that???

Anyway, congratulations, Rena, for being able to concentrate on fighting in that mess!!!

Saturday, September 29

Foul-mouthed Tuesday!

There's a new dark-haired beauty named Adrianna turning heads!!! Wowzer! She's a hawt little tamale! One head in particular she's turning??? Phillippe! He was spotted having an intimate chat with the little cutie Tuesday night in the Inn. We think we're going to LOVE this girl. She's got DRAMA QUEEN written alllll over her!

Lang was overheard by our sources telling the seeeexy Aaron that he has broken up with Rhy.... AGAIN! That would certainly explain Rhy's haggard looking appearance earlier in the day. Man oh man! We love these on-again/off-again couples. We doubt this is the last time these two will break up!!! We think Lang just likes steamy make-up sex!!!

...Or maybe Lang has eyes on another? He was busy propositioning The Gov Kitty while Aaron was trying to get her to promise to set him up with one of her friends. Iiiiinteresting.

The dark-haired twin Spice was spotted briefly in the Outback while her boyfriend Good Boy Cor was calling duels. She certainly did not look well after the events of Monday night. G'naughty G'nort was seen giving her the evil eye but, thankfully, he kept his beating on women to the rings!!!

FLAWLESS Koy was seen in the Outback as well looking absolutely flawless as always! She was dressed in a black crepe dress which was belted at the waist. And, in fact, she dueled in that very same outfit!!! This girl is absolutely FIERCE!

It appears Dakota may have found a home in the Outback. He was seen getting in a couple fights on Tuesday night. It seems like a perfect fit! It's one place where his foul-mouth and ill-temper will fit right in with the general populace!!!

There certainly was some drama going down on Twilight Island. Lucien and Topaz seemed to get into it over some unknown issue. Relationship drama is yuuuummy! It appears Topaz wanted to accompany Lucien on a trip that he didn't want her to. When he left without her, she left shortly after to follow him!!!

Sunday, September 30

Hormone Crazed Girls Thursday!

Thursday night immediately began with a depressing start as Rhy sobbed into Ryo's shoulder over Lang's many failings as a boyfriend. A man cheats on you once, definitely his fault. If he cheats on you once, you take him back, and he cheats on you again? Well, don't you share a bit of blame in your own heart ache? Well, Rhy'll be happy to know that Ryo laid into Lang later about his cheating ways. We don't think it did much good, though.

We're growing tired of heartbreak. I know it's that time of year. All the summer romances coming to an end. Yadda, yadda. But, come on? Isn't there one hot, new couple to get behind? A upcoming nuptial to look forward to? We're dying here! Isn't there anybody that will step up to the plate?

Speaking of heartbreak, Sweet Sugar was spotted in the common room of the Inn for the first time since her VERY public break-up with Darren and the drama that followed. Sugar was kept mighty busy tending bar and attempting to break up fights. It seems that Phillipe just can't seem to keep his hands off other people's property. Sugar spent most of her night attempting to make sure that the other patrons didn't murder the man!

Bad Boy Darren's got some nerve! He actually came in and attempted to convince Sugar to talk to him. She seemed polite enough but no deep conversation ever occurred. The loooovely Eless kept an eye on Sugar alllll night in that den motherly sort of way of Sid's. We HEART Eless!!!! Tucker joined Sugar behind the bar a bit later and, man, if looks could kill Darren would have dropped dead!!! Tucker clearly didn't like the idea of Bad Boy Darren being anywhere NEAR Sugar!

While "break-up" was the word of the night in the Inn, hormones were running rampant in the basement Arena. The single women of the Arena seemed a bit... crazy!

...Even cute Uriko was looking for a man! She was overheard by our sources playfully looking for a husband. G'nort volunteered his son while Imp volunteered his cousins! Thankfully, Uriko didn't take either of them up on the offer!

Hawtie Pirate Teagan tried her darnedest to lay a lip-smacker on Space Man Sartan while the pair were dueling. Sartan managed to avoid it and gave a stern lecture about how his lips belonged to his wife and his wife alone!!! He's so ADORABLE!!! It's really too bad his wife is... well, as crazy as a jay bird. Rory did appear later in the night and P-Imp attempted to cause some problems between the married pair by repeating what had happened earlier. Rory seemed to take it coolly enough but did give Teagan a lecture about attempting to kiss other women's husbands.

G'nort's little mistress Alex was up to all sorts of trouble Thursday night in the Arena as well!!! She was spotted SITTING ON GOOD BOY COR'S LAP AND KISSING ON HIM!!! NO LIE!!! Even Cute Single Erin was being flirty with Cor and... well, everybody else! In fact, there was at least one mention of some girl-on-girl action between she and Alex!!!

What a crazy, crazy Thursday night!