When they arrived at home, Sebastian wrestled with the doorlock, but managed to get it open in a timely fashion. He held the door for Erin, allowing her to enter first and get out of the cold air before quickly following after her and dumping the luggage on the foyer floor. He was humming and smiling happily as he moved to shut the door.

"You're in a much better mood." Erin said as she dropped her purse on the hall table, smiling faintly at home. "I wish Jon and Lane had stayed... I was really looking forward to seeing them again."

"Yes, well, we'll see them soon." He just left the luggage on the floor and
moved into the livingroom to light a fire, nearly stepping on the kitten and it came darting out from under the couch to attack his feet.

"Hey, you almost stepped on snowflake." Yes she named the black cat snowflake. Erin bent over to scoop her up, holding her close and snuggling a little. She smiled at him and lowered herself onto the loveseat. "What did you have to talk to Cassie about?"

"Oh, just family stuff. We talked about...work...and when I moved. Just, catching her up, I suppose. It was an overdue talk, anyways." He went about preparing the fire, speaking in light, conversational tones.

"You seemed mad at me... in the inn. Are you?" Tilting her head
as she watched him.

His demeanor gave nothing away. If there was one thing he'd just recently learned to master, it was his emotions. He didn't want anymore outbreaks like the other
night. "Not at all, love." He leaned back as the fire he'd started grew bigger; he reached
for some logs.

"Why the hell are you lying to me?" She frowned, taking her bottom lip into her mouth, biting on it slightly. "And what's the real reason you didn't visit.. when I was sick... you would have before... what are you punishing me for?"

Ok, so they were jumping tracks. Several, by the sounds of it. He didn't miss a beat. "I'm lying to you because it's easier than telling you what bothers me and then have you ignore me." He tossed another log onto the fire, brushed his hands off and turned back to face her. He wore that patented easy smile. "As for why I didn't visit, I told you the truth, Erin."

"You're infuriating. And I won't ignore you... sit down and why don't we talk about it... calmly even. " Her voice was tense, but she wasn't angry. Frustrated, mainly.

"But I don't want to talk about it, love. I've learned to deal with the way things are. If I couldn't handle it, I wouldn't be here, would I?"

"But you're upset and I don't like it at all." She shook her head, petting the kitten with a little more force than perhaps warrented. "I want things to be the way you want them. I can't... do this strange tense bickering. I hate it. I won't live this way."

"Ahh, but I've told you before what I want. We shouldn't have gotten married." A simple enough statement.

"Never calmly. I want you to lay it out for me in a rational way so
we can discuss things instead of having knee jerk reactions on both sides." A pause.
"Like that."

"Exactly."

"Fine. I'll start. You just hurt me right there.. when you said that. I'm not sure I believe it." Yeah, okay, she was starting to cry. But, she was still calm. Still had control.

"Look, Erin. We can't change things. We don't even know each other well enough to get along half of the time."

"Are you leaving me?"

"No. I'm just saying that this is a pointless conversation because the things I want fixed can't be fixed."

"Then fucking say something. Tell me what you want from me, because at this point I'm willing to do things I wouldn't have before. I can't stand your not being happy anymore."

"And it's sad to think it's taken you this long to notice." As he dropped onto the cushion beside her, he also dropped all pretenses. She could hear the hurt in his voice and read it on his face. "Well, notice enough to want to do somthing about it."

"I've noticed, I was just hoping you'd say something to me. Getting you to tell me things is worse than pulling teeth. I'm asking you again. Tell me what you want. What your ideal situation would be, and we can work from there."

"No Gideon. Whatsoever. That also means no gifts. Why didn't you go get it then and dispose of it while we were discussing it?"

"Done. " A blink. "I didn't think it was something I had to get up and run to do... I'll do it tomorrow. It's at the inn."

"And Gideon?"

Another pause and she gets up, walking to a drawer in the teacart, taking out a key, opening it and walking back to drop a necklace and a set of keys in his lap. She sat back down. "I told you I was trying to tell him never to talk to me again when I lost my lunch last night."

He frowned and fingered both items. "What are these for?"

"Things he gave me. A gesture from me, I guess. Since I can't smash the egg or anything." A shrug.

He frowned even more, but shook his head. Reaching for her hand, Sebastian turned it palm up and returned the items. "They're not mine to get rid of. But I appreciate the sentiment. I'd also like to apologize for not being enough for you; for not being...exciting enough." Funny thing was that he was serious. "However..."

She set the items aside and turned back, blinking a few times. "Sebastian... you're more than enough. You're... exactly waht I want. Why would you even think..."

"I'm not going to change anymore, Erin. I thought that's what you wanted while we were dating; that you wanted me to fit in. Well, I changed and I no longer like the person I've become."

"I'm not liking it either... I liked who you were when we were dating.. and now.. I never know who I'm going to get. You're moody and unpredictable and... " She shook her head, letting the cat go finally.

He paused, choosing his words carefully. "I know I'm not dangerous like Alain and I'm not as manly as Gideon...or...as...whatever Miles was to you...but I try to be what you need, Erin. So I tried being them."

"Gideon was dangerous.. and wrongly so. And Alain... Alain's my friend. I never... or would I ever... what the hell do you think of me, anyway?" Okay, that got her a little annoyed.

"I didn't mean it like that. I just meant...their personalities, Erin."

"I could have had any of them, Sebastian, and I chose you. Why would I want you to be them?"

"I...I don't know. I don't know what to think, Erin. I get so many different
signals from you and from other people. Living here is so overwhelming and different and
like it or not, I'm still not used to it. I don't think I want to get used to it. If getting used
to it means being friends with the people in the Dragon, like Skyler, and accepting them
for who they are, then I don't want to get used to it."

"I dont' mean to give you mixed signals, Sebastian. I don't. But I do miss you... the same you that took me to the docks or that let me dunk him at the carniaval. You were silly and crazy and slightly boyish and fun... I miss that you were fun. And I know it's my fault... that everything ruined you, but... don't try to change it." She sighed, wiping a tear away. "You don't need to get used to it... and you don't need to be friends with everyone... but, if I were going to get one request it's that you'd try to be closer with Lydia and Grem. Appologise, maybe. because.. they mean the world to me. And... I don't want to leave here. Please, don't make me leave here..."

"I'm not going to make you leave, Erin. But things are going to change, for me at least. We will be getting a housekeeper and a cook. I want to sell the car and get a carriage and a driver. I don't want you to have to walk places alone. And if you want to keep working for Alain and risking your life because you feel the need to have some fun, then I don't want to hear you tell me one more time that you don't like me working at the docks." He spoke calmly and kindly, perhaps even trying to keep a few tears at bay.

"All that is completely fair." She said, a bit shocked. "A lot of it I wanted to do myself.... " A faint smile. "And... the money is good, Bastian, you have to admit. I mean, it's relatively safe for the payoff."

"We're also not going to talk about it. You know I don't like it. So please, just drop it."

"Fine."

"I"m also not going to compromise my standards anymore. While I won't hold you to the same expectations, I'm going to be changing back to my old ways. There are things I will not talk about - things that no one should talk about. The marriage bed, for instance. Jokes and such, I find repulsive, no matter how much I've shown otherwise. I'm getting out of these godforsaken jeans, I'm going to remember my manners and act like the gentleman I'm suppose to be; that I want to be." This was obviously very important to him. "While I do enjoy the freedom from the rules of the
priviliged life, I'm no longer going to ignore the way I was raised."

Her face crinkled up a little and she tilted her head to look at him, shaking her head slightly. "Do what you want, Sebastian, but I won't be treated like a -lady-. I gave that shit up for a reason. I didn't come all the way out here to be forced back into that crap."

"Like I said, Erin...I'm not going to expect you to do so."

"Fine. Then go ahead."

"Have you talked about everything you wanted to talk about?"

"I want you to talk to me. Tell me what's up... I don't want you to lay a finger on me in anger again. I want to be free to do what I want to do... and not walking alone is something I accept. I don't want to be treated like glass, or porcelin or like any less than an equal partner in this relationship. I am not a hostess, I'm a woman. I want you to take my business more seriously than you did tonight... and I want you to trust me. I chose you, I invited you into my house, my bed.."

What bothered him about this portion of the conversation was that they'd
already gone over all of that. Though, the last part made it sound like he were cattle or
something. Like he wasn't worthy until she'd chosen him. But then, that was her
domineering personality. The least attractive thing, in his mind, about her - but no one
can be perfect. Just like he was not perfect for her. "Done."

When Sebastian gets a day off, he?ll be the first to admit he likes to sleep in until nearly eleven. Of course he wouldn?t sleep in that late with all the packing and readying they had to do still, but...come on! Six o?clock in the morning was way too early for him to wake up. So when he was suddenly aware that Erin was banging around and throwing clothing...and purposely being noisy, Bastian was rather annoyed.

The bed jerked a bit as she shoved things into her suitcase; Sebastian?s eyes reclosing when she started ranting. Why in God?s Name would she bring up a fight that was over with? He groaned; slightly irritated, and rolled over onto his stomach. He pulled the pillow along with him, covering the back of his head and his ears to drown out her voice. He lay there, covered from the waist down by the pristine, white sheets.

He?d certainly changed ? physically, too. The hard, back-breaking labor at the docks had filled him out; toned his upper body. The muscles in his back were more defined and his shoulders and arms were beginning to grow as well. He may not be completely ripped, or anywhere close to it, but he could certainly hold his own now thanks to Dakota.

When she was done speaking, Sebastian had a thing or two to say, but he really didn?t want to fight. Instead, he let go of one side of the pillow so he could see her and blinked sleepily. ?Ok, Erinalle. Now if you don?t mind, I?m going back to sleep for a few hours before I meet up with Truly.? That said, he reclaimed the pillow, put it back over his head and tried to go back to sleep.

He had only brought it up so Erin remembered that ?she- told him to go see her in the morning. He didn?t want her to forget and then yell at him when he got back. Which is something she would do. And if reassuring herself that a ?bitchy- Sebastian wasn?t going to show again was something she was trying to do, this wasn?t the way to do it. She?d bite his head off if he tried pulling something like this. Why did she get to do it to him?

?No, dear, you told me that last night and I told you I was going to change. Or have you already forgotten? So please, please, please stop trying to pick a fight.? She was so exasperating! He glanced over at whatever was slammed on the dresser and his eyes widened. ?Damnit, Erin!? He launched himself out of the bed, over Erin?s suitcase, and over to the dresser. He plucked up the bottle of cologne she?d so carelessly broken. ?This is from my dad, hon!? Obviously upset, Bastian grit his teeth together and carried the container into the bathroom. He was in there for several minutes and soon returned with the amber coloured liquid in a paper cup which he set on the dresser for the time being.

?You need to calm down. I don?t know what your problem is or how I am supposed to fix it. I?ve apologized twice ? three times if you count now. I can?t do anything more than that! I?m not going to change overnight? So tell me; what is the bloody problem now?!?

"Whoa, whoa, whoa....wait a minute." His entire demeanor softened as he approached his wife and gently grasped her arms. "Look at me." He didn't continue until she did so. "I love you more than anything, Erin. I -do- want to be married to you. I just think that we went too fast. We should have waited. We weren't thinking about the consequences and now we've made things ten times harder for ourselves."

Sebastian paused to just look at her. Crazy blue eyes swept over her face, trying to memorize every little detail - like the shape of her lips and the exact shade of her eyes. Conviction hit the man hard in the moment. God had given him this amazingly beautiful and priceless gift...and here he'd been treating her unkindly; acting not as a husband should.

"I screw up alot, Erin. I'm human. It happens. This won't be the last time." He shook his head and ran his thumbs softly across her forearms. "I like being here; I do. I like being with you. I like not living by the old rules. I like the fact that you're so damn hot the guys can't stop flirting with you." He grinned, running his hands up her arms and over her shoulders to rest on the curve of her neck. He drew her closer. "I'm going to make this work, Erin. I promise you'll get the old me back. You just have to be patient and pray for me. I need that."

Sebastian moved his arms so that he could accommodate the change in her position to hold her. ?Baby, I promise that I?ll be trying to listen to you more. But it goes both ways, love. You?ve got to listen to me every now and then, too.? Bastian smiled down at her, smoothed a hand over the side of her face and delivered a chaste kiss to her lips. ?So we?ve both resolved to listening more.? Sebastian grinned and released her, moving towards the bed. He grabbed her suitcase and put it on the floor, retrieved Erin and gently pulled her to the bed. ?Now listen to what I?m saying. Our packing can wait for an hour or two while we both get back in bed and snuggle.? A pause, then, ?Among...other things.?

He glanced at the door which was open just a crack. He didn?t want to take a chance of having Erin?s freaky roommate walking in on them. Ahh, another thing he was going to have to talk to her about. He bent and picked up a shoe, launched it at the door; successfully closing it tight. With a satisfied grin, Sebastian tackled Erin to the bed and pulled the covers over them