The scarlet leather book rested on the gleaming oak surface. Almost reverently she opened it to the first page and smiled. Her intention was clear, anticipated delight written plain on delicate features. Carefully she smoothed a hand over the page to level it out before picking up the pen. ?You and I are going to be best friends. I?m going to share everything with you starting with all about back home and Damien.?


I grew up in a small out of the way farming town Lexia, well not really in the town itself. I lived with my parents and one sister on a farm outside of town. I learned at a very young age the horror and sometimes terror of death. I was lucky to also have learned the value of unconditional love and honor in life. Having always had chores to do I learned the value of being responsible and accountable for my own choices. Life was hard but there were so many rewards and so much love in our family that it made the hard times easier for us.

I first noticed the shy, quiet boy when we were freshmen. It was then that I was bussed to the Capital City High School. That was a major change in my life. I couldn't figure out how or where all of the people came from. But of all the new people I met and saw that first week this shy, quiet boy intrigued me the most.

I can remember whispering with my friend Kara about how cute he was back then and us trying to decide why he was always so quiet and stayed to himself. Being the person I am I decided he was really cute and he should get to know me better. I set out on my new mission with a plan. I began a lifetime ago by making it a point every day to say Hi to him. Finally after three months I got a nod in return. I will never forget how excited I was. I swear I spent the rest of the entire day in a daze.

I took that as a good sign and the very next day I began stealing his milk at lunch and then drinking it in front of him. This inevitably got a look from him. After an entire month of this he spoke "Good?". I almost fainted. I blew him a kiss and walked on.

I began waiting for him and sneakily following him everywhere and yes I was so besotted I even waited around the corner outside the bathroom. All this got me were strange looks and summer break.

I thought of him constantly, wished on stars, and talked to my horse Dreamer about him. I always have and still do love riding. That was the summer I learned to fight. My father sent me to the junior college to learn self-defense. I loved it and I do still practice daily. Fall finally came around and with it him. I again began saying Hi, stealing his milk, and following him everywhere.

After another month without a word from him I employed desperate measures. I began to throw my books at his feet every day. Did I say that? I meant I accidentally dropped them. Wordlessly he?d glance at me and pick them up handing them back to me.

Did I see a smile? I decided yes but looking back now. It was a smirk. This went on for the rest of our sophomore year. On the last day of school as I walked to the bus, he spoke one word "Bye".

I spent another summer dreaming of him constantly, awake or sleeping, knowing deep in my soul that he and I were meant to be together forever and that someday we would be.

At 16 I decided I was grown and didn't need tricks. I strolled into the school and up to him and softly laid a trembling hand on his arm in the barest of touches, smiled, and said "Hi". Wonder of wonders I got a quiet hi back.

Being me I wanted more so I continued with my previous years plans. The milk, the books, the "Hi"s . It was all worth it for those every morning "Hi"s back from him.

I was there in the hall on the day he had enough. I knew that something had to happen eventually. I had always felt the predator locked inside him. I think that was the part of him that called so strongly to me. I stood transfixed as he moved so gracefully yet with deadly precision.

The crush I had for more than two years died and a love stronger than time itself was born in my heart. I remember my heart in my throat each morning as I waited to see him in his uniform. I remember worrying on the days he was away.

Mostly I remember the day I finally went to far and tripped him to get his attention. Boy did I get it! He was back on his feet holding a gun in my face before I could blink. I laughed knowing he never could or would hurt me even though he hadn't acknowledged our bond. I slowly pushed the gun away leaned forward and kissed him as I had longed to for such a long time. Then giggled as he stood there in shock while I went to my next class. I finally had achieved my mission!!!

We started dating and even though to this day I don't know all of his deep secrets I have never had a reason to doubt him or his love for me. Don't try to tell him it's love he can't say that word but he will. The Friday night of our Junior Prom I got a phone call telling me he had been killed on a mission. As I searched my heart, I knew they lied but my head took over.

I still don't really remember the next years well. I did pray each night for him to come back for me one day. The next thing I really remember is being out on the plains riding ?Dreamer,? the flash of clear blue sky lightening and knowing I wasn?t home anymore. I can only think the Goddess heard me and sent me here to RhyDin for him. It was the happiest day in my life when Damien found me here. The rest? Well I guess we will see . . .

Closing the book the cowgirl placed it within the drawer then locked it pocketing the key. Damien was off on Guild business who knew where but she was going to go out looking and didn?t need anyone getting into her things while she was gone.