Topic: Scatterheart

Mealla Sterling

Date: 2011-08-10 04:27 EST
I laid on my back on my bed, one arm flung above my head, the other resting across my abdomen. It was hot, but the rain was beating down on the roof of the flat, lighening forking across the sky from where I watched it out of the window. The only light in the room that was on was the desk lamp, shedding a small halo of muted yellow. I didn't really need it, but I was used to it. Some might say, 'maybe you're afraid of the dark. Night light?' But they'd be wrong. I wasn't afraid of the dark. I wasn't afraid of being alone.

Part of that was because I was never really alone. And it wasn't me that was afraid, anyway.

She was quiet for now, crouched somewhere in the corner near the light. She liked to be near it, and we'd had a lot of discussions (read: arguments) about her always wanting the light to be near me, so that she was comfortable, sandwiched between a soft glow and me. But I told her I couldn't have it glaring in my eyes all the time. I have to have some standards, right?

I was watching the storm, so I couldn't see her, but I could feel her. I knew she was there. She'd been there since I was seven.

Margaret Elizabeth Willowby. She was about seven or eight, though she couldn't remember exactly. A small girl, both in stature and general size, with dark eyes, brown hair that couldn't quite decide if it wanted to be curly or just wavy, and little bow lips that reminded me of a cupid. Her clothes were old fashioned and drab- dark navy blue and white, with a bonnet that sometimes wasn't there, like she forget whether she had worn it or not. Not very stylish, but what could you do when you're dead?

She'd died in 1692 in Salem, Massachusetts. She'd been sentenced to be burned at the stake for being a witch, along with her mother. Her mother had been a free spirit and that was never good in Puritan society. They'd burned Margaret first to make her mother watch, and then? Then the orders were stayed and her mother got lucky.

They say when you die and you don't leave it's because you have unfinished business. I didn't know what the business would have been, and I'm not sure Margaret knew, either. I tried to help but she didn't really talk about it that much. I think she is afraid to move on. But I'm not one to force her to do it; it isn't my place.

I'd been seeing ghosts for a long time, but she'd been here the longest, attached to me for years and years. I'd picked her up when I was visiting my grandparents in Tennessee. I'm not sure how she ended up in the state, but maybe she was called to me. That's what Sam told me, anyway. That some people draw ghosts, and I guess that's what I do.

Of course, to most people I just seem crazy. And maybe I am, a little. I'm not even really sure anymore. Margaret is absolutely terrified of people hurting her, and she made me swear that I'd never tell anyone about her unless she said it was ok. There has been exactly two people she's said it's ok to- my best friend, Lily, and Daigh. Lily I think because she's around a lot and she has her own problems, and Daigh because... well, it's Daigh.

I can't really explain to anyone, so I'll just have to keep on looking crazy. But that's a small price to pay to give Margaret some peace of mind, really. And I'm used to people discounting what I say, so I'm not losing out on much!

Mealla Sterling

Date: 2012-01-23 18:08 EST
(Backdated from a few months ago)

She always made it a habit to turn off everything that could be turned off before she left, to save energy. The loft had been dark when she came home, and she left it that way.

Mealla stood at the large windows facing out onto the West End street down below. The rain was pouring, obstructing her view with tiny rivers that flowed across the windows. People hurried on the pavement beneath her, like ants running from the oncoming flood. It distorted the brick building across from her, left it misty and somehow foreboding.

There was silence in the loft as well, so thick it was a wonder it didn?t shatter with the raindrops and fall like glass at her feet. The feeble lights from outside were the only company. Even Margaret had withdrawn to the corner, flickering in and out as she left Mealla to her thoughts.

She?d seen Rory that evening, after months of him being gone. No words, no note. He?d just gone and disappeared. His excuse? He?d found a way to ?go home? and had left, simple as that. But yet he?d returned and? what? Expected her to feel something? He was right, partly. She felt anger, and she?d shown him it by the split lip from a well-placed punch crowned with a steel-toothed ring.

Katt had come to her defense and she?d appreciated that, but people misunderstood. The fact that she was angry he had left had been true- it hurt her and she hadn?t had the strength to hide it. But it wasn?t because she loved him. It hadn?t even really been because she missed him, at least not after a few weeks. When all was said and done, she hadn?t know him but for a handful of days.

It was the plain and simple fact that he had left without enough decency to say anything. It seemed to be a recurring theme with people and it left her drained and small.

Maybe it was Rhy?Din itself. Maybe it sucked people away, tore them from you like a riptide and left you questioning whether you?d see them again or if you'd be forced to learn to move in the world without them.

Maybe that was how it felt to be a ghost. To move and wish and yearn for people and not be able to find them, to touch them. She spent so much time around spirits that it seemed second nature to have someone following you. Maybe she?d transferred that on to people who still breathed the air and felt something other than the touch of days they couldn?t get back. Maybe that wasn?t fair to do.

She turned away from the window and disappeared into the gloom of the loft, feet pale as a moonbeam stretched across the floor. Her hand hurt from the installation of its wrath. It was time to sleep and pretend the happy girl inside wasn?t clawing to get out.