It's raining again. Three days in a row now. I was glad of the rain on the first day, it had a way of relaxing me. I read by the window and listened to it fall. Yesterday was a hard rain, the creek is way up now, could be a problem. Today is a slow rain and looks to be an all-dayer. The sky is gray and the air chilled. I may have to go out today but I'd really rather stay here by the fire.

Okay, I'll get to it. Haven't seen my Cait in almost a week now. I promised to let her work through things and I've kept my promise. Said she had to go back and pick up the last of her things and she would be back here to stay. Don't think anything's happened to her though, don't have that feel. I miss her. I worry.

If the rain lets up any today, I'll take the dog down to the creek and let him run. Been cooped up too long. If it keeps raining, I'll tune that old guitar of mine and play a song or two. Maybe Cait will be back today. Maybe today.

The Inn again tonight. Someone's birthday. Big party, big crowd. Not my Cait. Should have known, she doesn't like big crowds. Lost my wallet. Going back in the morning. Found out Scotch can be ordered there by the case at a much cheaper rate. When I find my wallet I'll order some I think. Need some sleep. Need to get some food tomorrow too.

Guess I walked too far. Seems I can't stay out of the Inn. Found the one that stole my wallet the other night. Kendall something, don't think I caught her last name. She kept thinking I was going to hit her. Disappointed her when I didn't I think. She offered to pay for the scotch. Next time I'll let her. She owes me. She knows it. Think I'll grab a nightcap and get to bed.

It must be the Irish in me. Can't seem to stay settled for long, can't seeem to appreciate what I have, can't seem to make anything work. Came home to an empty house today. I was gone a few months but hoped that things hadn't changed. Stupid. Of course she was gone. Nothing here to make her stay, and after all the time and effort. Stupid. Took forever to get this place, build it up, and convince her to come and stay. Stupid. Must be the Irish in me. A lot of work to do, in a lot of ways. Just stupid.

Well I did it. Went to the Inn for a look around. Asked a few questions to some folks but no one has seen her. She's probably back in Denver. I may be the world's biggest idiot. I worked so hard to convince her and turns out she was right. She was right about a lot of things. Maybe I'm not such a good person. Maybe I'm not the person she thought I was. Hell, maybe I'm not the person I thought I was. Think I'm gonna try some of that Scotch afterall.

A.