Absence, hear thou my protestation
Against thy strength,
Distance and length:
Do what thou canst for alteration,
For hearts of truest mettle
Absence doth join and Time doth settle.
-That Time and Absence proves rather helps than hurts to loves, John Donne

Midsummer was coming. Colwyn, Nyla, Miriam, nearly everyone had reminded her that the Midsummer celebration was coming in three weeks. She could not imagine people wanting to celebrate with their Baron dead, but, she supposed to them life went on. She was not sure how much of her life she could carry forward past losing Kieran.

Sylvia walked the gardens in the comfortable nighttime warmth. Her arms wrapped about her not from any chill but to sooth and hug herself around the rock of pain at the center of her. He had been gone two days and as weary has she felt, she needed to be outdoors away from faces. The boys were asleep as was Beata for the moment. She wondered if Cian would come crawling out to find her again and cling to her through the night, where she then could not weep in silence.

In the garden she let the tears fall and the sobs shake her shoulders. ?He was supposed to stay with me. We were going to be old together. Oh?,? the racking pain dropped her to a stone bench and she sat rocking there in the moonlight.

Songs of nightbirds were distant and then silent. In fact the entire garden seemed to hush and lean around her to comfort her, so when a bird settled hard upon the bench beside her she jerked back suddenly in dismay. It was peculiarly intent upon her, but did not seem to have a desire to do harm.

Not well versed in birds outside of the hunting kind, but she is rather certain this one was a Needletail. She wiped away the moisture from her eyes and looked over the bird again whereupon she spied the carrying note. Moving slowly to not startle the bird, though its curious steadiness made that seem unlikely, she withdrew the note and read.

What Sid offered struck through Sylvia and set her mind so quickly ablaze that she had to steady herself from fainting by gripping the edge of the bench. To bring him back from the Meadowlands? Oh, what a choice?

The week of the Remembrence had been difficult. The symbolic decorations of mourning across the Barony would continue for a year as was tradition. Sylvia spent a few hours at a time in the Great Hall listening to the stories of Kieran and the sympathies of the populace. She did not hide her tears, but kept them soft. When it became too difficult, she would excuse herself and go to her room and weep until she felt control again.

Cian had become such a good little boy, doing precisely as he was told when he was told to do it, and had also taken a few walks in the Great Hall where he was given respects he was not used to. All this was done under the eye of Prince Maelgwn, who had taken up temporary Protectorate of the Barony of Yransea until a suitable person could be found. Lyana had refused the position and spoke loudly her argument on Sylvia's behalf. Her protestations listened to politely then dismissed as easily, the Prince claimed the duty for himself while the ministers debated the choices.

"Lyana," Sylvia spoke to the lady after the meeting, "you must see their point of view. I would cause a precendent that could be used against them. They must secure this Barony and more importantly this port in the hands of someone they know has no desires or whims to be elsewhere."

"It's a foul move against you, Sylvia, and I won't have it." Lyana, who had relished Sylvia's arrival those years ago because they were so very similar. Both had non-ladylike athletic and fighting interests. Because of Sylvia's background, Lyana had found a new freedom to pursue her interest in the warbands and the life of a swordswoman. She felt a keen sense of loyalty to the woman who had brought her such wonderful change.

Sylvia laughed weakly, "And what will you do, take the warband and surround the manor until they lay siege?"

"Not a bad idea," Lyana teased and then picked up her nephew Aiden who climbed up onto her lap.

"Oh do be serious. They are not saying I cannot be a mother to my son, only that I cannot be Protectorate. It is an entirely different matter."

The two ladies sat in silence a moment longer, delaying the need to return to the Great Hall. Beata was sleeping soundly for the moment and Cian was playing quietly on the floor. Sylvia looked to her eldest with concern. In some ways she missed the impetuous, rambunctious boy. She would have to coax his pain out of him, for now it was shut up inside and there it could only poison his heart.

"I should return," Sylvia rose and Lyana did the same holding Aiden. "The final day." The idea struck her, and she place a hand to her breastbone where the hollowness clanged its toll of pain and memory. She then straightened and walked out to face those that also grieved.

Sylvia walked through the town of Seansloe on her way to the house of Ewan Corinsson. Only one guard walked a step behind to the right. A place that once would have been Ewan?s when he was in town. The feeling was so different with the young woman behind her. Lyana had selected the guard when told she could not go herself. The message had to be clear: Sylvia went to see Ewan without coercion.

The day was clear and warm, the dark green of her unadorned and simply made gown soaked in the touch of the sun. She ignored the growing heat of her body and walked along the streets with in an unconcerned pace. The people bowed or bobbed curtseys as she passed all with sympathetic expressions darkening their faces. She gave them grateful and understanding smiles, even when a trio of men were laughing. The guilt painted their necks and cheeks as they bowed their heads, and she smiled just that bit more to let them know laughter was not a shame. However, they would not raise their heads and so she walked to them, ?Gentlemen, there is no shame in laughter. The Baron often found laughter a fine remedy for ailments of the spirit. It does not lessen your honoring of him by continuing with your life. We all must.? It had been elements of things she had said all through the remembrance combined together.

They lifted their heads, murmured the grateful words, and she walked on. The eyes continued to follow and even more heads stopped as she turned to open the gate of the front garden of a now infamous home. She knocked upon the door and waited its opening. A slight turn of her head and she saw curtains flutter in houses across the lane. The snoops were about their busybody business. The guard, Preian by name, whispered, ?Perhaps we should invite them in.?

Sylvia whispered a brief laugh just as the door opened and there stood Maeve with her mouth slightly open. It took only a moment for the lady to gather her wits and make a nervous smile while opening the door wider, ?Please,? she managed to project a calm voice, ?come in, Your Excellency.?

The foyer and hallway beyond the door was quiet for only the moment it took for Sylvia and Preian to enter. Then it was filled with people. Sylvia smiled to Lenika, Gaerwyn, the children nearby. When Ewan came from the parlor, leaning on a cane, she felt the honest warmth of the smile fall away and it became a forced smile.

?Would you like some tea?? Maeve asked as she ushered Sylvia past Ewan and into the parlor.

?Yes, please,? she answered while taking a seat. When Maeve stepped away to the kitchen, Sylvia turned to Ewan once more who stayed standing, his knuckles white where he gripped the cane. ?Please, Master Corinsson, sit with me.?

Sylvia walked slowly along the pathways of the Marketplace using up the small space of time she had in leisurely observations. Ewan walked at her side and kept careful watch on their surroundings for any trouble. ?I must say,? he began, ?you're arrival at the inn was surprising, my lady.?

? I hope I did not cramp your style, Ewan, though you seemed as sullen as you ever are.? She picked up a leather pouch and looked it over wondering if she should change out her old one.

A tilt of his head, he wondered, ?Cramp my style? I sometimes forget you had lived here many years before coming to Yransea. You did well in adjusting there.?

?I had every reason and encouragement to do so.? Her smile was the ever frequent bittersweet one, ?I had Kieran.?

Ewan stiffened and cast his gaze elsewhere until he felt comfortable speaking again.

She noted his discomfort and set down the pouch she had been contemplating to turn to him. ?Ewan,? she reached out a hand to his arm, ?this will never go away. You will always have to live with what happened, but please know with every certainty that I do not blame you.? She paused a moment to choose her words. ? It was a hard thing to get my heart to wrap around, but my husband told you many times...I am stubborn,? she turned to walk on and with an enigmatical smile, ?rather like you.?

He could not say how much it hurt and touched him that she could forgive him, but surely the look of sorrowed thankfulness was on his face. Yet, at her light tease, he managed a smile, ?Yes, I suppose I am stubborn.? He joined her once more as she walked on.

?Stubborn to a fault in what you think you need to do to protect people you love.? The entirety of her point in her request that Ewan travel with her Marketplace came forward now.

His mouth turned downward, ?My lady, I would ask you not bring up this subject. It seems too many people have a concern about my latest choice.?

?As well they should be, but the number does not discount my own concerns, nor my advice. I am still your liege, Ewan, and you unfortunately must suffer to at least pretend to listen to what I have to say.?

?Of course I will listen to what you say,? he bowed his head slightly, suitably chastised.

?Good,? she nodded in turn, ?though I speak more as a friend now, Ewan, which you know I am.? She took a deep breath and drew their walk to a stop at the fountain where she sat and motioned for him to do so as well. When he did, she continued, ?Kieran and I had our differences, and well you know I had my dangers with my life, though you were ever so young then.?

?Indeed, my lady, I had just joined the warband the year before, but Seansloe was sputtering about with ever bit of new information on who the Baron had finally set his affections.?

Hers was a temporary laugh brought on by memories, ?And well I know it. The differences we had to accept, and changes we had to face were important to us. Did you know Kieran was going to abdicate the barony for me? I would not let him, of course, but in counter to that I was willing -- willing to give up my life to be with him. What if he had not let me make that choice, Ewan??

?I suppose saying this is a completely different situation will not help?? he tried for levity.

?Do not be flippant, Ewan,? violet eyes narrowed on him, ?and no, it would not help.?

?I am not being flippant,? he spoke more soberly. ?I am being factual. You did not let Kieran make the choice to leave the Barony. I am not letting Storm make the choice to waste her life with a dead man.?

The comment stung to the core, and she turned her upper body swiftly and slapped him across the face.

Surprised and unprepared, his cheek stung where she struck. His green eyes widened as he looked upon her in confusion.

?Is that what I did? Is that what Kieran might have done if I had died? Wasted our lives? Do you think anyone in this world is safe from losing someone they love too early? Did your mother waste her life?? Her words tumbled out with fierce determination that he understand, and she stood with the energy of her strong words. ?You are special, Ewan, but you are not that special.?

He stood in dismay and thought on her words, and then fell back on his latest reasoning, ?I won't toy with her affections. I have ended it. Am I to ask her take me back now? How could she trust me not to do it again??

?I may need to hit you again, Ewan, if you do not start being reasonable. It is her choice to trust you, not yours. The only thing you need to decide is if you love her.?

He lifted a hand to protect his face, ?Please, one strike is enough, my lady.?

A snicker, she nodded, ?Let us return home. I might come back to purchase a few things later with the children, but by the time I arrive Beata should be up and hungry.? She wondered as she looked on him and the reddened mark where she had hit him if she had made him at least start to think of letting go this obsession with controlling his life.

?Of course, a faster way through here, my lady.? He guided her direction and thought hard on what she had to say. That the direction they were going took them by Storm's new home he fully realized.