Fionna's assumptions about Jaster?s character were correct. When he arrived in the marble and granite lobby of the RhyDin town hall, he did not appear barbarous or uncivilized in the least. He was dressed in a tieless black pin-striped suit with a burgundy silk shirt, and wore a fine gold watch that, upon closer inspection, appeared to be connected to the headset he was arguing rather nastily into.
Once he was within proper earshot of the building's front door, he ended the conversation and pressed a button on the headset, retracting it into its usual form, an innocuous gold cufflink. He replaced it on his sleeve, breezed in through the front door with a tusked grin for passersby, set his elbows on the front desk, his chin on one green fist and told the poor receptionist, "Grand Poobah, here for a twelve fifteen with Her Excellency."
This caused more than a momentary bout of confusion and consternation. The receptionist, who had been working in the position for exactly 3.5 days at that point, flipped through a city directory the size of a small phone book ineffectually, looking under both the H and the E entries. But neither a 'Her' nor an ?Excellency' were anywhere in evidence. It probably did not help that a good 80% of the entries in the book were crossed out in black marker. City turnover had been notoriously high when Dris's name was finally taken off of the door upstairs.
At last, in a last-ditch effort to be helpful, the hapless girl - named, according to her badge, Daisy - looked up hopefully and asked, "Does it begin with an 'X'?"
"Only in the ancient tongue of my barbarous people," he murmured as he leaned forward to peer at her handiwork. "Daisy... that's a pretty name. She should be in the A's... somewhere between Akzuut and Albion."
Jaster shifted his chin on his fist to grin up at her, tusks creeping further up his upper lip. "And Grand Poobah should be filed under A, D or J. Depending."
"Your people have a very confusing alphabet." Her lower lip quivered. "I'll bet that 'Daisy' begins with a 'Y' there, doesn't it?" She had green eyes. They almost matched the color of his chin.
"It sure does!" he almost cooed. "Pretty name for such pretty eyes... You know, Daisy, or Y'si'ad as my people would say... I would be willing to bet that the appointment was misfiled under Aurene, Dib Jaster for al-Amat, Fionna Helston. Just a hunch."
She blushed, dipping her chin. "I almost never guess right," she murmured. Glancing down at her name tag, her green eyes widened, and the search for Her Excellency was derailed by the fact that her badge did indeed read 'ysiaD', albeit upside-down. Her mouth formed a little rosebud of a surprised 'Oh' as she looked back up at him. "You're a magician!"
"Voila." He produced the brown paper bag from where he had unobtrusively set it down on the corner of the desk. "Another trick - mu shu pork for myself and the governor." He winked. "If you would be a dear, Daisy, and call her please, and let her know I've arrived."
"The Governor is listed under 'G'," she told him, and dialed up to Trista's desk.
"There's a magician here who called himself the 'Grand Poobah," who has a lunch appointment with the Governor," she said. "It smells good - the lunch, not the Poobah - or, well, wait, actually, he does smell good," she peeked shyly up at him before she remembered what she was doing. "That's 'P-O-O-B-A-H', I think. But in the tongue of his billberry people, it's probably more like 'Haboop' Anyway, who knew I was good at languages?"
"What? Oh. Yes." She turned a quarter of a swivel away from him and whispered, "He's kind of cute."
Jaster tilted his head and smiled pleasantly, for the moment utterly taken with the green-eyed (and possibly air-headed) lady across the desk from himself. Absolutely adorable, she was. At the remark, he wiggled his fingers in a wave.
"All right," she concluded, nodding as if Trista could actually see that over the audio line. Then she hung up and swiveled back around. "Trista says I should stop driving you crazy and send you upstairs. Was I?" a little mournful, the question.
"Oh, not at all, fair Y'si'ad!" he replied, playfully swatting at the air between them. "As my people say, le'ew-ri'af!" He slipped away from the desk and towards what he assumed was the correct stairwell, then looked back at her and pointed at it to confirm that yes, this was the right way.
She nodded, cheered by his response, though not at all certain what he was really asking her. "le'ew-ri'af!" she called after him with a sigh and a smile.
"Where the hell am I..." But as he went upstairs, the memory of his last visit here clicked. He quickly found his way to Trista's desk, and from there the governor's office.
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(This segment adapted from live play with Dib Jaster Aurene, with many giggles and thanks)
Once he was within proper earshot of the building's front door, he ended the conversation and pressed a button on the headset, retracting it into its usual form, an innocuous gold cufflink. He replaced it on his sleeve, breezed in through the front door with a tusked grin for passersby, set his elbows on the front desk, his chin on one green fist and told the poor receptionist, "Grand Poobah, here for a twelve fifteen with Her Excellency."
This caused more than a momentary bout of confusion and consternation. The receptionist, who had been working in the position for exactly 3.5 days at that point, flipped through a city directory the size of a small phone book ineffectually, looking under both the H and the E entries. But neither a 'Her' nor an ?Excellency' were anywhere in evidence. It probably did not help that a good 80% of the entries in the book were crossed out in black marker. City turnover had been notoriously high when Dris's name was finally taken off of the door upstairs.
At last, in a last-ditch effort to be helpful, the hapless girl - named, according to her badge, Daisy - looked up hopefully and asked, "Does it begin with an 'X'?"
"Only in the ancient tongue of my barbarous people," he murmured as he leaned forward to peer at her handiwork. "Daisy... that's a pretty name. She should be in the A's... somewhere between Akzuut and Albion."
Jaster shifted his chin on his fist to grin up at her, tusks creeping further up his upper lip. "And Grand Poobah should be filed under A, D or J. Depending."
"Your people have a very confusing alphabet." Her lower lip quivered. "I'll bet that 'Daisy' begins with a 'Y' there, doesn't it?" She had green eyes. They almost matched the color of his chin.
"It sure does!" he almost cooed. "Pretty name for such pretty eyes... You know, Daisy, or Y'si'ad as my people would say... I would be willing to bet that the appointment was misfiled under Aurene, Dib Jaster for al-Amat, Fionna Helston. Just a hunch."
She blushed, dipping her chin. "I almost never guess right," she murmured. Glancing down at her name tag, her green eyes widened, and the search for Her Excellency was derailed by the fact that her badge did indeed read 'ysiaD', albeit upside-down. Her mouth formed a little rosebud of a surprised 'Oh' as she looked back up at him. "You're a magician!"
"Voila." He produced the brown paper bag from where he had unobtrusively set it down on the corner of the desk. "Another trick - mu shu pork for myself and the governor." He winked. "If you would be a dear, Daisy, and call her please, and let her know I've arrived."
"The Governor is listed under 'G'," she told him, and dialed up to Trista's desk.
"There's a magician here who called himself the 'Grand Poobah," who has a lunch appointment with the Governor," she said. "It smells good - the lunch, not the Poobah - or, well, wait, actually, he does smell good," she peeked shyly up at him before she remembered what she was doing. "That's 'P-O-O-B-A-H', I think. But in the tongue of his billberry people, it's probably more like 'Haboop' Anyway, who knew I was good at languages?"
"What? Oh. Yes." She turned a quarter of a swivel away from him and whispered, "He's kind of cute."
Jaster tilted his head and smiled pleasantly, for the moment utterly taken with the green-eyed (and possibly air-headed) lady across the desk from himself. Absolutely adorable, she was. At the remark, he wiggled his fingers in a wave.
"All right," she concluded, nodding as if Trista could actually see that over the audio line. Then she hung up and swiveled back around. "Trista says I should stop driving you crazy and send you upstairs. Was I?" a little mournful, the question.
"Oh, not at all, fair Y'si'ad!" he replied, playfully swatting at the air between them. "As my people say, le'ew-ri'af!" He slipped away from the desk and towards what he assumed was the correct stairwell, then looked back at her and pointed at it to confirm that yes, this was the right way.
She nodded, cheered by his response, though not at all certain what he was really asking her. "le'ew-ri'af!" she called after him with a sigh and a smile.
"Where the hell am I..." But as he went upstairs, the memory of his last visit here clicked. He quickly found his way to Trista's desk, and from there the governor's office.
----------
(This segment adapted from live play with Dib Jaster Aurene, with many giggles and thanks)