The diner was old enough that the spaces between neon lights had become greyed out with wear. Sonny was in an SUV, the sort of vehicle a person never imagined he would like until they accounted for his size and how those sorts of vehicles would suit it. In the MacIntosh camp, all the big vehicles for the heavy lifting were black. It made Sonny feel like he was part of the FBI, rolling up in the black SUV and parking at the half-abandoned gas station-turned-greasy spoon diner.

Sonny was waiting, not knowing what to expect. Ezra was in the passenger seat next to him, looking as though his eyes monitored the sun as he spoke, ?Yeah, they?ll be here any minute.?

Where the boxy SUV was dark and anonymous, the sleek red Subaru was bold, and it made a statement. It said ?I?m here, and I have other places to be, so this better be important.? The car wasn?t exactly Ian?s style but Jay loved it, and it made him feel more substantial, and anyway that ass**** Jimmie had had no business behind its wheel. So Ian had taken it back at the same time that he?d taken Jimmie?s life, and he drove it now because he?d earned it.

The kid checked the GPS program on his phone and then made a right turn. ?Should be up here on the right in three quarters of a mile,? he commented to what looked like empty air in the passenger seat beside him. If he made a point not to turn his head, Ian could just barely make out the man?s outline, but of course it vanished if he looked that direction. So he didn?t. Instead, like Ezra, he checked the angle of the sun.

Just a few minutes later, he made the right turn into the parking lot, spotting the hulking vehicle that had arrived ahead of them. ?What kinda men in black bull**** is this?? He mumbled under his breath as he shook his head with a dim smirk, parking the car in a slot that was a few spaces away and then cutting the engine. The windows were tinted nearly opaque, and Ian took the moment to light a cigarette with a glance towards the passenger seat before he got out. ?Ready for this??

?No, but it?s **** happening anyway.? He didn?t have to grab the handle of the car and pop the door open but he did. There were always echoes, always habits, that came to him from being alive. They were more prominent when he was stressed, when that ?instinct? kicked in. He didn?t know what sort of instinct the dead were supposed to have, just that he knew what it felt like to behave in a way that didn?t make sense because it was what was known. The door opened, he pinched the brim of his had and got to his feet like he meant business.

Inside the SUV, Sonny blinked through the tinted window and looked at Ezra, ?What is this??

Ezra reached over, ?Take a breath and get out of the SUV. It?s Ian.?

?I know it?s Ian but??

?Just get out of the car.? Ezra waited, wondering if Sonny would hit the gas and jolt from where they were parked like a rocket back to Silas. He swallowed, putting his hand on Sonny?s massive shoulder. He pleaded, his voice softer, ?Just get out of the SUV for a minute.?

It was a small eternity, from the point that he asked until Sonny?s door opened and the ox took five paces, then stopped at the front of the SUV. He recognized Ian, but his pause came longer, it held and cut the air when he looked at Josh. His voice wavered, ?Is this some kinda joke??

They had timed it perfectly. Josh wasn?t there when the door seemed to open by itself, but he was by the time he?d shut it. Ian breathed through his nose and got out of the driver?s side, closing it rather deliberately behind him as well.

The way he pulled on the cigarette hollowed out his cheeks, giving his face the temporary look of a deathmask the way it always did. You could practically see the shape of his skull underneath his skin when he did that, like death itself had marked and claimed him. So perhaps it had. He rounded the front of the car, ashing the cigarette once and then holding it out for Josh, his gaze fixed like steel on Sonny.

?No one lied to you, Sonny. Josh is dead. Me an? Grace an? Dave gave him his last rites and put him in the ocean.? His gaze turned from Sonny to Josh and then back. ?But dead don?t have the same meaning in Rhydin that it does everywhere else.?

You would have to know him really well to notice how tense his muscles were despite the deliberate way he slouched. The kid scarcely breathed, waiting on the ox?s reaction.

?So, what, you got some sort of look-alike?? Sonny?s shoulders were bunched up like a cat arching its back. Ezra swung his eyes from Sonny to the newly materialized Josh. Sometimes, it still hurt. Everyone remembered what it was like to watch him die.

?S?not a look alike,? Ezra said, scratching the side of his throat and then motioning to them, ?That?s ****?.... That?s Josh.?

Josh?s hand went to the top of his hat, pulling it off so that his features couldn?t be half masked by the twilight. His feet were planted, shoulder width apart. Between the two cars, he was but five feet from Sonny.

?****, no one looks this damn good but me.? He cleared his throat, following behind Ian?s explanation, ?Rhy?Din?s different. We don?t all just? go like we?re used to seeing people go.?

?No, I saw you. You-? Sonny folded his arms over his chest like he was protecting his heart, ?You fell, you died. You? you died.?

?Yeah,? Josh said the word softly, stepping up to Sonny, ?but I still got **** to do.?

Once he?d put the burning cigarette in Josh?s hand, Ian pulled his shirt off. He reached behind his head, grabbing it by the collar and hauling it up off his back and then over his shoulders. Slinging it over the right arm, he stood there directly beside his ghost lover, his gaze on Sonny.

The amulet made of gunmetal had been turned to his back in the process. Only the thin line of its chain was visible across his throat.

The sugar skull tattoo with the word REVIVAL in its teeth was there, plainly visible on the left side of his chest. So too were the still-pink scars of the bullet wounds that smeared the top portion of the ink. ?We know what you saw. He died in my arms, and the bullets that killed him nearly killed me.? He smiled faintly, taking a lean against the sloped nose of the Subaru as Josh approached his old friend.. ?So yeah. He?s dead, but he?s also here. Both things are true.?

Josh took a pull from the cigarette and waited. He waited on the large ox to start doing the math. To have the reality of the situation sink in. Ezra frowned, looking up at him, ?Yea, it?s all of that.?

?I feel like my head?s gonna **** explode.?

Ezra cleared his throat, ?And like you?re so **** happy and devastated all at once??

?... Yeah,? the ox barely breathed the word out and then looked at Ezra, who nodded a few times. Then he looked at Josh, still behaving as if he was some unseen party. His head swung back to Ezra and Ian, looking for confirmation.

?I?m right the **** here,? Josh set his hat on top of the Subaru, handing the cigarette off to Ian so that he could step up to Sonny, giving him a few half smacks to the side of the face, ?I?m right the **** here you idiot.?

?But you??

?Yeah, I did, I was there.?

Then Sonny stepped forward, giving Josh a bear hug so great that he was lifted off his feet, looking small and rather like a stuffed animal a hulking giant had found. Only Sonny could make someone so monumental look small.

Ian accepted the cigarette, leaning down to balance it on the car?s front bumper so he could put his shirt back on. It settled into place, and once it had, he reached underneath it to pull the amulet back down where it belonged. Only then did he retrieve the cigarette, just in time to catch Sonny?s eye. He gave an encouraging nod.

He?d been about to say something about how much Josh hated being ignored when suddenly the big guy moved, gathering Jay up in his embrace. Ian exhaled a breath he hadn?t realized he was holding then, but not without the strange pang of irritation that his lover was hugging someone else. Sure, it was just Sonny, and Sonny was different. But still. The kid shook his head, flashed Ezra a quick smile that said, **** finally, and pulled hard on the cigarette.

?All right, all right, set me down.?

Sonny did, eventually, after it seemed like he might wring him down to nothing. When Jay was able to gather himself he planted a hand on Sonny?s chest, ?There?s been rumors, and ****?s been said everywhere so just hear it from me. Ian is my **** boyfriend, and that **** isn?t changing. If you have a problem with that, you can step away and I?ll get it, sort of. Second, I only have an hour each day to? sorta be this. I?m mostly here at the twilight, and the rest of the time I?m with Ian. I don?t have all the **** answers, but if Ian goes, I go.?

The lay out of it was brutal and hard. Maybe it could be because Sonny was there. Maybe it was because this was how Mac delivered news and warmed hearts to his cause. Ian had been kinder with Ezra, the moment had allowed for tears and recovery. Mac was past that, now. He wanted things moving, and going forward, and perhaps some part of him forgot that Sonny was taking this in for the first time. The ox was speechless.

A grin rose unbidden on Ian's mouth as Jay started explaining. He dragged on the cigarette again, clenching it temporarily between his lips as he lifted his hand away, raising two fingers in a gesture that was part salute and part acknowledgment. **** boyfriend, present and accounted for. ?For the record,? he said, pinching the cancer stick between one of those fingers and his thumb as he picked himself up off the hood of the car, approaching at last. ?...I won?t get it if you walk. Who he?s with doesn?t change who he is, who he?s always been, or who he is to you.?

Ian glanced sidelong at Ezra, giving the other man a hint of a smile before he slid his arm around Josh?s waist, reverting his attention to Sonny. ?And in case you?re wondering, ain?t either one of us trying to **** anybody but each other, so...whatever wild thoughts you might be terrifying yourself with now, you can put all that to rest.?

His tone softened subtly as he relented. ?It?s a lot to wrap your mind around, I know. It?s messed up when you?ve mourned someone you loved and then discover that they?re still around, at least partially. It sucks, and there?s no way around that. But he?s here, Sonny. As here as he can be.?

At the Salty Dog, it was only the people who had been shaken by Mac?s death the hardest that were there. The more people that knew of him, the more likely it was to get back around to Silas. Mac was fine with a few rumors of his half existence trickling out, his Uncle would take the rumors to be a superstition worth respecting. If people were whispering that Mac was alive, they may believe Silas was cursed. And if he was cursed? How could the murder of Mac still seem just? Silas couldn?t afford to let a toxic belief, even if the ghost was only gossip, poison the well.

It would stack the deck ever more perilously against him. Sentiment was already turning; as deal after deal fell through, and rumor of Ian?s victory over Jimmie began to circulate, it was scarcely any wonder that Silas had gone on this religious pilgrimage. Seeking salvation.

For now, it was a loose secret held between allies. They would begin whispering, his name revived from a place of no mention.

They drank. Ezra got shots and was often on his phone, seeming to take on the unappointed role of social coordinator. Michael appeared, as did a handful of others, each taking in Mac?s appearance with an initial hurt. Maybe it was that the mind recognized him, sitting at the picnic table with that broken smile and half cocked brow with the scar, but knew it couldn?t be him, bringing the memory of his death back to the forefront.

It hurt. It always hurt to swallow and accept how he?d been shot down, his body left behind like it was nothing. When the pain receded, when the realization hit, there was a joy that sometimes left eyes glassy and laughs nervous.

They were adjusting to him being back. They told stories of what he missed, mostly the funny ones, because there had still been so much left to say and they wanted to laugh with him. Josh smiled under the shadow of his fedora, throwing in a verbal jab here and there when the boys left the opening. Mostly? He listened. They had questions, some of which were repeated because of the drinking. Yes. We?re together.

Ian?s mouth moved close to his ear and he tilted his head into it as if to hear him better. The smile he had changed, his teeth flashing when his lips broke apart. He slid one hand down so that it straddled Ian?s thigh, his grip a half circle over his leg when he gave it a squeeze that said I know.

For the most part, Ian watched in silence. It wasn?t that the lads weren?t glad to see him-- many of them said as much-- but still, the question of the boy was complicated. Heir apparent. Barlow spy. Hardly more than a child, but then he?d handled things with Jimmie like a man, and certainly more respectably than Jimmie had. The speculation--now confirmed-- that he was Mac?s lover; the speculation -- still unconfirmed -- that Ian had only been named Second because he was Mac?s lover. Ian was simultaneously the kid they?d known and come to like, an unknown quantity who may or may not have been their enemy, and...the person who had rid them of the plague of Jimmie, the person who had brought Mac back to them, the person who would lead them out from under Silas. Despite the festive, joyous nature of the celebration, Ian never missed the way different sets of eyes grazed over him speculatively. He knew they had questions. He knew they weren?t yet ready to ask. He drank, he smiled, he cracked the occasional joke, and he waited.

He tried not to squirm in his seat when Jay gripped his thigh like that.
Swallowing more whisky, he answered the groping squeeze with the kind of smile that deliberately drew his lip ring back against his teeth, metal scraping the porcelain so quietly that the noise would be lost to anybody who wasn?t...specifically attuned to it. I know you know.

?You gonna show him?? Ezra said with a grin, propping one foot on the bench seat at the picnic table. Sonny looked up from his beer at him, clearly having no idea what Ezra was talking about. ?Seriously??

?What are you talking about??

Ezra sighed then and his smile went over to Ian and Mac. He was blushing from the shots he?d taken, but he was still easy to understand. He wasn?t tripping over a large vocabulary, anyway, ?Look, I don?t know if this is funny, or kinda creepy, but? yeah, like a week after you died we all went out and got some ink like we did for Johnny. Kinda funny to have a tattoo for a guy that winds up not being dead.?

The dangerous flirtation that was just getting started between them might have escalated considerably, were it not for Ezra?s interruption. His brows furrowed fractionally, though his expression remained unchanged.

Tattoos? He shot Ezra a curious look. They?d been in contact nearly every day for months now and the man...hadn?t mentioned any tattoos. He looked from Ezra to Sonny and back. ?So what is it, then??

Mac was trying to look like he didn?t hear the lip ring, but he always, always did. He sipped his drink, forcing his gaze not to fall on Ian. Ezra was going to talk.

The idea that the tattoos would have been something to share hadn?t occurred to Ezra. There was the break in communication, then the reunion. They had happened since, and without anyone taking off a shirt, he hadn?t thought about the tattoos in terms of a greater context. A bit tipsy and with the crew that also had them, Ezra had seen a sort of dark humor in it.

?You don?t get tattoos,? Mac said to Sonny, the tilt of his head increasing as his gaze leveled off on the man.

Sonny was slow to meet his eyes, but when he did there was only an avalanche shrug in response to the statement. The air was stale except for the sound of other patrons scurrying around the bar. The giant didn?t always chime in, but Mac?s eyes were locked on him, expectant, which pushed him to explain, ?It was you, you know??

?Yeah,? Ezra was trying to inject something more lighthearted, his presence, into the conversation, ?and they look pretty badass. You wanna see??

Mac leaned back, his gaze shooting at Ian from the corners of his eyes before he smiled, pandering to Ezra?s enthusiasm with a smirk, ?You think it?s unlucky for a dead man to see his memorial??

Michael snickered, which caused Ezra to give him a look before he reached to his sleeve, tugging it back. There was Johnny on one side, Mac on the other. The man was covered with MacIntosh ink. An old tipped, plaid fedora with numbers under it was there. Presumably, over the part where fatal bullets had splayed. The placement wasn?t exact; the tattoo artist had argued that it needed to be moved a few inches so that it didn?t look strangely stamped to their chests. The twisted cloth of his shirt found relief when Ezra unhooked his hand from it, the cotton bounding back over the curve of his shoulder.

?Well?? Ezra looked at Sonny, who then sighed and mimicked him. Ezra looked at the others, ?and you? Seriously??

Eventually, and with a few more smiles, the others came forward. It was difficult to say if they were embarrassed to share because it was Mac, or if it just made them seem softhearted and they weren?t angling for that.

Ian was quiet, his expression unchanged throughout the exchange between Jay and Sonny. Acutely aware of the rapidly dwindling time left to them tonight, he busied himself with pulling a cigarette from the pack that lay on the table at his right hand, his weight shifting on the bench seat underneath Jay?s hand as he fished the sparkly pink lighter out of his pocket to light it. Rolling the flint back to create the usual small shower of sparks, the kid dragged fiercely, hollowing out his cheeks as he sucked in smoke.

His gaze lifted from the task just as the tattoo on Ezra?s chest was revealed, so near the placement of his own catrina tattoo with actual bullet holes in its forehead. The likeness of the hat was surprisingly perfect; either one of them had paid an enormous amount of attention to it, or there was a picture somewhere to have been used as a reference. Ian glanced from Ezra?s tattoo to the ghost rendition that was still perched on his lover?s head, thinking suddenly--without wanting to-- of the way the real thing had been knocked off at the time, the way Ian himself had retrieved it, handed it off to Dave to put back on his head as the body first began to cool. He could vividly see his own hands, stained scarlet with Josh?s heartblood, the fingertip shaped smears that had still been on its brim when it went in the water.

How many nights there had been since then, when Josh came back to him with no memory of the event, or worse yet, with gunshots still ringing in his ears. How many times he?d had to relive it. How many times he?d had to re-explain it, recalling every soul crushing second of it in painstaking detail. His brow furrowed fractionally, and it was the only indication he?d give before those grey green eyes went smooth and placid, detached and blank. With the cigarette still caught in his lips, he dragged his empty shot glass closer, tipped his chin at Geoff or whoever it was that was closest to hand to refill it for him.

He looked up, and there were half a dozen fedoras, seemed like, one on nearly every man present. Setting the cigarette aside in an ashtray, he looked from one to the other and nodded, lifting his glass to his lips. It burned as he swallowed, but he kept going until it was finished. ?It?s a nice tribute,? he said finally, trying to master a cough brought on by too much whisky too quickly, or maybe that was just a good excuse. ?Was it that same shop we went to before??

?Yeah, it was,? and there was an unease then, in the whole lot of them. They went from laughing, embarrassed and proud to? pausing. To a place of hesitation. The air itself held its breath.

Mac addressed it.

?Ian?s one of us, and you don?t **** around with any thoughts otherwise.? Tonight beside him was still his Josh, the one that knew what day it was and what it was they were trying to do. Was it possible for ambition to propel a soul so far forward that it could not be forced back into history? That he could not die because he was so entangled in what needed to be done? Or maybe it was the unspoken, the insidious idea that love could mean that much, instead of meaning everything.

Jay?s hand slipped under the curve of Ian?s, stealing his cigarette for a pull. He used the cigarette to point, ?I?m here because of him, and I?m here because of a lot of things. We worked our **** out and all you **** need to know is that Ian is taking care of **** with me, and what we have in store for this whole crew is better than what Silas or any other **** does. They?ll keep you in the dust and shadows, which is how a **** dies.?

The men with fedora ink waited. There was shame, it slithered on the floor like a snake, creeping out the back door, wanting not to be mentioned again.

?We drink, we bull****, we get to planning. And you keep your ****? mouths shut. Silas has what?s coming to him for being the sort of piece of **** that kills family.?

Ian cleared his throat. The shared cigarette slipped away from him, he lifted his chin to address the group of them. ?Perhaps you?ve noticed the string of bad luck the crew is having lately.? He spoke quietly, his tone as perfectly calm as the expression on his face had become. This was Ian at his scariest: distant and remote, calculating and cold. He gestured his glass, waiting for it to be refilled, waiting to be sure that he had every man?s undivided attention.

?It isn?t bad luck,? he continued after his first swallow. ?And it isn?t a curse either, well?? He smiled then, and there was something positively lethal in the curve of his smile. ?Unless you consider my undivided attention a curse.? He shrugged ambivalently, but his tone said it all.

?I have been moving against Silas since I made up my mind not to die with him,? he glanced sidelong at Josh there, and the mask cracked just a little, one corner of his mouth lifting higher than the other in part of an affectionate smile. It resolved itself back to impenetrable stone when his gaze reverted to the men, every one of which had ten years or more on him.

?Make no mistake: what?s coming is coming, just like it came for Jimmie.? He didn?t actually say the words with or without you, he didn't need to. ?But I know you have questions. So gather your questions, and gather anybody else who wants to hear the answers. You?ll get your chance -- and only the one chance -- soon.?