Topic: Job Application

Chaos

Date: 2007-08-01 12:36 EST
Dear Oracle People,

How are you doing today, I hope you are all good and happy.


Well I am applying for the "Advice on relationships" Section in the paper. I see that Gav is stopping for health reasons.


I think I would be good at giving advice. I have had lots of practice at it when I have to heal the shattered hearts of all the ladies that Gabe and guys like him completely destroy at a drop of a hat. Yes, I know I am a terrible super villain when it comes down to it. But I have plenty of experience in giving advice. If you do not choose me I will understand, I guess it just was not meant to be.


Personal Information:

Name: Bob.

Age: Infinite

Occupation: Super Villain

Race: Abyss

Motivation: Destroying the...I mean helping people.. And dropping the love affair I seem to have with the comma...and maybe the dots too.

Contact Info: I am around all the time. Just let me know.

Goals: To apologize to Jewell for saying all those mean things that one day I was with Tommy in the Inn, I was woefully not ready for him, but now I know what I did was not very nice. I am a bad guy, not a monster.

To help people get their act together and stay together if possible.

Being even more awesome than I already am.

Spreading subliminal messages to control the world through their...issues


::The application would be found in the application box if there was one to be had, it was plain as could be, no anthrax or other killer virus on it what so ever::

Amaltea

Date: 2007-08-01 15:19 EST
Becky comes in to to work, they are still not paying her enough for this, and finds the application. She reads it. Lifts an eyebrow. She always wanted to be a columnist and now that Gav was not doing the job this was her chance, but she couldn't just destroy the letter, no. The guy will come back and ask and then what? It got lost? No, no, there has to be a better a way.

Becky looks left, then right, and instead of putting it in Amal's box, she leaves it in Tera's. She wants to make more money and this is her chance. She hopes they don't find out that she "accidentally" misplaced the letter. She then goes to work on her own advice column to leave in Amal's box, unsigned. Yeah, that way she won't know it's from her. That's a good plan.

Tera Destre

Date: 2007-08-01 16:01 EST
Des comes strolling into The Oracle office building with her royal guards and a steaming cup of caf? mocha. Today she is dressed in a navy blue flowing gown that matches her eyes and the ribbon that is threaded through her upswept hair with the two curls left free to sway charmingly over her shoulder as she moves. Her jewels were specifically picked to accent her clothing as were the slippers that grace her dainty feet and make no noise as she crosses the reception area with regal nod in greeting to the hated, good-for-nothing, nail filing, Becky.

She checks for messages upon reaching her desk as her guards assume their usual unobtrusive positions to begin their alert watchfulness over their Monarch. Her movements unhurried now that the August issue is out and the deadline for the September issue a couple of weeks away the cowgirl Queen seats herself making sure her gown isn?t crushed beneath her then shakes out her skirt so that it pools prettily around her in a pool of blue just as she had been taught. She then picks up her drink with one hand and the first of the messages with the other and begins to read while maintaining her posture perfectly along with a pleasant expression upon delicate features.

Des hadn?t read far before she realized this wasn?t a message for her but a job application from someone. She wasn?t supposed to get the applications but since that no-count Becky had messed up she was going to read it as curiosity got the best of her and it surely wouldn?t hurt anything to take a quick peek at who was wanting to take over her beloved husband?s column.

She glanced around then back down and read faster. Her eyes growing wider and wider the more she read. She couldn?t believe a Villain wanted to be a Reporter. And not just any Villain but one that had threatened two of her best friends Wyh and Icer a while back. And on top of that according to this application he had also been mean, and who knows just how mean since that horrid Tommy was involved, to her Keg Sister, Jewell.

Des folded the application and tapped it on her desk while glancing around as she thought this all over. So many options to pick from. Bob said he wasn?t a monster but she had seen with her own eyes in the Inn differently. He said himself he had been mean to her Keg Sister. She knew he had put out contracts on two of her best friends. Being a Reporter was a paying job. Would she really want to allow him to get a paying job even though being a Villain she was pretty sure he didn?t need the money that way it was still a steady income and carried some prestige with it. How much trouble would she really get into with Amal if an application went missing. It wasn?t her job to keep track of applications.

But maybe better safe than sorry so she stood and ever so casually moved over to Jewell's desk and placed the application in her inbox then turned and went back to her own desk for all the world looking as though nothing of great import had happened.

JewellRavenlock

Date: 2007-08-01 16:32 EST
It was usually a miracle when Jewell came into work (she had too many other, more important things to concern herself with she would argue) except immediately after a new issue of the paper came out. She needed to get paid, didn't she?

She waltzed into The Oracle building fashionably late (read: midday), new high heels--that she bought with the money that Amaltea had yet to pay her--clicked and clacked so satisfyingly on the tiled floor of the lobby. She and Becky wasted time in a short stare down because Becky just could not forgive the fact that Jewell had went and married the man that had shot at her. It didn't last long, however, as Becky always looked away first and Jewell was allowed to continue on her merry way, smiling smugly.

Seeing that Amal wasn't in at the moment, and therefore unable to hand over her money, Jewell needed some way to pass the time. A few minutes were passed in chatting amiably with one of the interns that did most of her work for her and didn't get more than diddly squat for it; she felt that is was nice to smile kindly upon the poor boy now and then to make up for that fact. Unfortunately, the kid was hardly able to hold up a conversation with her for long, palms sweaty and pulse racing from just being so close to her!

Bored with that, Jewell moved on over to her desk to see if anyone had left her any interesting messages. She rarely checked them but poor sweaty boy (whose name was Jose, not that The Empress really cared) had been doing her job for her quite well and there was only one item in her in box. Flopping gracefully onto her seat, she lifted the paper up and perused it for lack of anything better to do.

She was quickly sitting up straighter, frowning at what she read. "You!" She barked over at poor Jose, who, after contemplating running away, came dashing to her side in a manner of seconds.

"Yes, ma'am?"

"What is this?" She waved the paper rapidly in front of his face, too fast for him to be able to even see what it was. He waited patiently for her to hold still for a few moments before actually daring to grab it out of her hand! She scowled at him.

"Uh...it looks to be an application, ma'am. From someone named Bob."

"Yes, I noticed that. But I don't handle applications around here." Her tone was all sorts of condescending before she paused and doubt filled her next question, "Do I?"

"Uh...no, ma'am, you don't."

"I didn't think so!" Back to being smug. "Though," snatching the paper back from Jose and looking it over, "maybe they should let me...that way no more useless misfits like Becky would be hired. Do you know she hit on my husband?" eying Jose over the top of the paper.

He swallowed visibly, "Umm, no ma'am I had not heard that."

"Well she did, and now they want to let this psycho work here? I simply cannot allow it! He insulted me once and simply cannot be forgiven. Here," she held Bob's application out for Jose to take back again. He eyed her before nervously reaching out and taking it, "Take care of this."

"Ma'am?"

"What!?"

"What exactly do you want me to do with it?"

She groaned, covering her face a moment. "I don't know! Boy, can't you think on your feet? Give it to Miss Wyh or something!" Shoo'ing him away.

He didn't waste a second in fleeing the area, dropping the paper haphazardly in Wyheree's inbox before fleeing the office. He was taking a second lunch break today.

Wyheree

Date: 2007-08-02 02:12 EST
It was mid-afternoon when Wyh shimmered into the clear space just behind her desk - saving her from confronting the receptionist. She found it hard to believe people got paid for sitting and filing their nails.

Taking up a copy of the latest Oracle, she settled in her chair, a slight grin as she saw she again had the front page, when a gleam of white in the little-used box on her desk caught her eye. Setting her Oracle aside, she snatched up the paper, and as she read it, her silver eyes narrowed, and the temperature around her desk plunged. How dare he? How dare he apply to work here, after what he had done? She did not care about the bounty against her, but he had threatened her Pirate King. The paper began to frost over as her temper flared.

Ice crystals trailed in her wake as she stalked through the offices. Thoughts of freeze-drying the paper danced through her head - but then if he stopped to ask about the application, he would have questions as to where it went. After considering all her options, she decided the best place for this particular piece of paper, was with the one who's job it was for. Wyh walked over to the fine oaken desk that belonged to the King of Westridge, and let the ice-encrusted page flutter to the top of his Inbox.

Then, she returned to her desk, and the reading of her paper.

Norm and Jeff

Date: 2007-08-02 02:23 EST
Jeff Pike just happened to be stopping by the Oracle offices to pick up the plate from the cookies that Norman's old lady had made in honor of making deadline. As he walked through, though, looking for that plate, he couldn't help but notice a sheet of ice-encrusted paper laying in Gav's inbox.

He paused there and looked at it for a moment, then back in the direction of Wyheree's desk, then shrugged to himself and tried to read it. It took some peering to see through the frost on it, but eventually he made it out.

And then, laughing for reasons that were purely his own, he shook his head and kept on going. Yes, Gav could handle that one.

Gavilean

Date: 2007-08-02 03:37 EST
Gavilean walked into the Oracle office with his camera around his neck and the latest issue up in front of his face. ?Hi, Becky,? he said, passing by her desk without looking at her, face still buried in the paper.

?Hiiiii, Gavie,? she crooned while filing her fingernails. ?Wanna take my picture? I?ve got some great poses to show you.?

?Some other time, Becky,? he said as he went up the stairs. He went straight to his desk and set down his camera and paper. He noticed a nearly frozen paper on his desk, at first thinking it to be from yet another wife who disagreed with his relationship advice in the previous issue. When he saw what it really was, he was even more surprised.

?What the . . . !? He looked around to see if anyone was watching for his reaction. ?Is this some sort of macabre joke birthed in the pit of a very sick mind!?? he asked out loud. He saw no one looking; no giggles were heard.

?This is inconceivable! Bob wants to take over my old column!?? He read over the ?qualifications? on the application. ?Okay?I?ll keep an open mind. Let?s see how he measures up to the job description.?

CANDIDATE JOB DESCRIPTION FOR ?DEAR GAV? COLUMN

1. Candidate can spell? ?Yeah, he seems to do okay on that point.
2. Candidate knows proper grammar? ?I?ve seen worse. I guess he passes that point too.?
3. Candidate is married or in a long-term committed relationship? ?Not even close.?
4. Candidate has a proven track record of getting along with people? ?You?ve got to be kidding. They all hate him.?
5. Candidate knows how to be candid in a kind and humble way? ?Not even close! He actually thinks he?s awesome.?
6. Candidate has experience in counseling? Gav laughed, ?I think he NEEDS counseling!?
7. Candidate has a gentile deportment and affable personality? ?Oh yeah?right! Talk about being just the opposite!?
8. Candidate can take criticism and rejection? ?Hmmm?we?ll soon find out.?
9. Candidate is a respected member of the community? ?Let?s see, duh, he?s a super villain.?
10. Candidate is well-liked and respected by our readers and can relate to the frailties of the various races? ?Good grief! He?s an infinite, super villain from the abyss! No way!?

In spite of all this, Gav was going to accept the application until he read, ?Spreading subliminal messages to control the world through their...issues.?

?What?! Using people?s problems as an avenue to control the world? No way!! This would be like having Count Talomar Longden manage the city?s blood bank! ? Gav took out the rubber stamp that said ?REJECTED!? and stamped and initialed the application.

He then walked over to Sharon Gossip?s desk and set the application there for her to read and review.

Sharon Gossip

Date: 2007-08-02 22:36 EST
It?s been nearly two months since Sharon was last sighted at the Oracle?s office. Where she?s been and what she?s been up however remains somewhat a mystery. Looking a bit bedraggled and more clumsy than usual, she trips her way inside, bobbing her head to Becky before making her way towards her desk.

For a moment she stares at the papers scattered over the surface, somewhat distractedly, until her eyes find the rejected application. Gingerly she picks it up between finger and thumb and begins to read over it. Eyes widen behind thick ugly glasses as her lips form the perfect shape of an ?O?.

?My! A supervillian offering advice?! Now that is novel, but truly a bad idea.? She sits down in her chair contemplating if there is a story behind this or not.

The ?Rejected? stamp infers that this applicant isn?t getting the job, but the confession of being a supervillian holds some promise. Of course, Bob had been mentioned before in the Oracle, and she is well aware that many of his exploits have already been documented. However since he?s back in Rhy?Din, it might be wise to keep an eye on him.

News comes in many forms, and a self-professed supervillian ought to offer up a lot of tidbits worthy of mention. If for no other reason than to keep the community at large well informed so they can potentially avoid trouble and conflict. (After all, that?s what a good reporter for a respected newspaper should do!)

Not at all sure what she is supposed to do with the rejected application, and assuming Gav has already seen it, (because of the ?Rejected? stamp in big bold letters), she decides to ?file? it away in the trashcan beside her desk. Then, before she forgets, she jots herself a quick note to keep her eyes peeled for any sightings of Bob.

About an hour later, after sorting through the two months of papers and notes on her desk, she goes to toss out the irrelevant bits and once again spies the application. Realization dawns; Amal may want to keep it on file for real, if for no other reason than to be organized and thorough. Fishing it out of the trashcan, she writes a quick sticky note to Amal asking if this should be kept which she places at the top of the application. Wandering over towards her editor?s office she places it in the box labeled ?In? that sits on Amal's desk. Yes, let Amal decide what to do with it.

Always wiser not to annoy one?s editor and chief, especially after taking a leave one hadn?t officially asked for.

Promptly forgetting all about it, Sharon heads back over to her desk and gets down to business. There are many stories on her plate which have had to be shelved due to her absence, and now she has to work double time to catch up. But first, she needs to prioritize and that may take her the rest of the day.

Things in Rhy?Din are fluid and change often. What was relevant and useful last month may well be outdated today. Sharon needs to re-evaluate, which stories to keep and which stories to shelve. Of course, then she needs to finish them! Interviews, research, fact checking, they are all part of the process and must be done before a story goes to print. Boy, does she have a lot to do!

Lyndra

Date: 2007-09-03 15:28 EST
Gossip is as gossip does and gossip always got around. This was especially true at the Oracle where gossip flowed on every air current and bounced around for several months. One could breathe in a lung full with every breath, or exhale just as much. This one caught her attention above all others as she moved through the building and made her way to her desk. The place buzzed with how Bob had applied for Gav's advice column.

Her fingers drummed rhythmically upon the varnished desktop even before she sat down. The frown was deep and her gaze stared out the window while she contemplated. She nodded slowly, confirming to herself she would need to speak with Mistress Sha'uri on this.

"Gods, Gav... I hope ye don't really give it up."

That's when the idea hit her. She was probably too late for this next issue, and didn't know what would be in it, but she went by Gav's office anyway, to leave him a note about it, though it would be unsigned and typewritten.

She put it in his IN box and headed back to her office.


Dear Gav,
I hear, through the grapevine, that a certain villain has applied for your old job with relational advice. As insane as that might sound, perhaps you should consider taking him up on the offer, if only to offer a point and counterpoint to the advice. Perhaps it's time RhyDin reads for themselves what kind of being this villain really is. It would be interesting to see who's advice holds water over time.