Prelude:
Alaemnah laid on her bed crying for hours. The days to come were going to be the hardest for her and she felt so totally alone right at that moment. Her eyes were swollen from all the tears spilled and her wiping them away. Still she was determined to go to the Kurii that evening.

So it was that she finally rose and went to prepare for the evening. Only when she was completely ready did she open her door and make her way into the hallway to start what now felt like just a long walk, without peace or calm to steady her.

Instead of peace, her mind ran to snippets of conversations she had had since coming to the Slaver?s Association. But now the words all sang as a mockery to her and ripping little pieces of her heart away inch by inch. She didn?t care who saw her now, not the guards nor the slaves, not the masters nor the mistresses.

As she walked, her feelings had finally gone from completely raw to totally numb.

No time for good bye, he said as he faded away.
Don't put your life in someone's hands, they're bound to steal it away.
Don't hide your mistakes, cause they'll find you, burn you.

from: Get Out Alive
~Three Days Grace

Brutin sat in his office going over manifests for merchandise when he heard the light footfalls of a girl on carpet. He had barely enough time to look up as Nadine threw herself into his arms and burst into tears. "shes gone! she said ifn i dun do as Gun says she'll leave ferever!" She managed to get out out in between great inhalations of air.

"So it is finally over and done with." He said and she dug her face into his chest and bawled like a baby, the tears coming hard. He threw his arms around her and rocked back and forth. "Shsssh." He cooed to her as he dragged a hand through her hair but she cried unabated.

"i tole her i dun luv her!" she sobbed out in disbelief. "she wus mean ta me!" Again but Brutin just rocked her and kissed the top of her head.

"You had to let them go, they love each other. They do not belong in our world." He said as she dissolved back into a flood of tears and wailing. It was like she was sixteen and freshly captured all over again. He just held her tight and let cry.

"oh my god, she's gone!" she bawled and curled up in his lap as misery shook her entire tiny body. He was no stranger to this and he envied her tears, it would have made his own life so much more easier to bear. He could feel her tears through his shirt now and he felt a slight twinge, perhaps he had miscalculated the feelings involved.

"Is your love for Alae any different than your love for Sami?" He asked her and she shuddered against him.

"oh god! yer makin fun of me..." she managed between tears.

"I have no doubt Sami cares for you deeply, but she has someone she loves, she does not have time for a mere slave girl. And now Alae has Gun and they have their lives ahead of them. They do not have time for you." He said and she broke down further as he squeezed her heart in his hand. "It was best to nip this in the bud so you were not hurt again." He said and thought of people and their penchant for stereotypes.

"she lied ta me! an den she admitted she wud make Gun go an she wud go wit im!" She managed and he nodded knowing she could not see it. She went back to crying.

"She had to make a choice. You will never fall into a valid choice because of who you are little one. We are in a different world." He soothed to her as she cried.

"he is gonna keep tryin an i cant piss him off or she'll leave...wut do i do??? how do i survive???" she wailed and to him seeking answers. But there was none. There never would be.

"This time I did not take them away from you." He commented and hoped she would see the idiotic humor in it but it passed unnoticed overhead.

"Alae left....an Gun made me get up in his lap." She managed to continue between fits. He sighed as he heard her words. "he tried ta act like nutin happened..." She broke down again and curled up tighter "he is gonna act like nutin happened. she wus cryin an he acted like nutin happened..."

"Nadine." He cautioned her.

"he made me sit in his lap!"

"Stop."

"i...."

"Leave him be. Leave them both alone." He warned her.

"i cant.... hes not gonna let me. he said as he finally left dat he wus lucky ta have two women. two! he took from me an now he considers me his! an Alae said ifn i test my leash she'll leave... wut do i do???" Her words sought understanding, she was putting the pieces together for herself and he knew he was only along for the ride.

"i cant....

"please no..." She fought some internal battle as Brutin sat there and clenched his teeth. He knew which way the wind was going to be blowing on this and no matter what this would not end prettily. Alae had cried she said. Gun had been there. This poor girl. Did they think this was over? No. It had only just begun.

She cried herself to sleep finally, his rocking and warmth, the strength of her tears, exhaustion had finally taken over and he let her sleep for some time. The radio spewing soft music into the office so he didn't drive himself batty the only sound as the girl slept. Perhaps it was the words that caught his attention or the beat, he had never paid much mind to the damn thing before. Now he listened to the words before something finally clicked in him and he stood up, taking the girl with him. He shifted her around until he held her close and comfortably and as he stepped off to his room to lay her down the lyrics rang out like a prophecy not his but hers, and he was the only one to bear witness.

You mean the world to me, it crossed my mind
The days of knowing you , You've been too kind
You cast your pearls in front of me
Guilt is complex, when I face the facts

Some day we all fall down

"The Clan of Xymox? Sounds like Magicians." He muttered to himself.

The next morning
She had again risen to the stars just before the dawn and slipped from bed watching in the pre-dawn gloom as Gun slept for a few minutes before getting dressed and slipping out. Her stomach was a bit queasy, so as she stepped into the kitchen, when Cookie went to get her morning cocoa she had stopped her.

?Have you got any tea??

?What kind??

She had offered a bit of a smile at that, ?Surprise me.?

She was still feeling a bit tired, and could only assume it was due to how much crying she had done the day before. While she waited for the tea, she went over to an empty chair and sat down, laying her head on her arms crossed on the counter. It was only as she saw feet approaching that she lifted her head and took the cup offered her, ?Thanks.?

With the tea in hand, she made her way out to the garden. The stroll each morning had taken her past his window, and she had never bothered to look up at it. This morning though was different. She not only looked at it, but actually stood there as if transfixed, staring up.

As she stood there, an image of her reaching down and picking up the largest rock she could find and hurling it at that window came to her. Just as sure as that image was, she was equally sure she would never do it, but she couldn?t shake that image.

This world will never be
What I expected
And if I don't belong
Who would have guessed it
I will not leave alone
Everything that I own
To make you feel like
It's not too late
Will never be too late

from: Never Too Late
Three Days Grace

Once more into the flames - Part 2

The next time you decide to tell me to be tough on Nadine and I even consider doing it, would you mind popping me over the head with a 2 by 4 and knocking me out for about a week until everything passes?
~Alaemnah to Brutin

She moved over to the stairs and sat down on them, patting a spot beside her, ?Nadine, would you come join me??

Nadine had padded over and sat down beside her. Her hands were placed in her lap.

?I'm going to ask again, did you lie to me when you said that you loved me??

why dun ya believe me???

You've told me two different things, and I know that you aren't allowed to lie, so one of them is true and one isn't, but I need to know which is and which is not.

?why? why cant ya jus be happy wit Gun? why cant ya jus ferget me? why...??

?Do you think that's how it works? Because I love Gun I forget about you? Love isn't like that. It has room for you, room for Gun, even room for Brutin.?

?i cant.??

?Can't what??

?nutin mistress. ill be fine?

Alaemnah reached up and gently stroked Nadine?s hair, ?Can't what??

?i cant go on. we cant have dis conversation??
Confused, Alaemnah asked, ?Were you told to not say something to me??

?no mistress.?

?But we can't have this conversation. Why??

?cuz its tearin me up inside?

?Nadine, sometimes just saying it is the best. The tearing is only fear. And fears are often bigger than what actually will happen.?

Nadine leaned forward an put her head in her hands, as Alaemnah placed a hand on her shoulder. In muffled tones, Nadine asked Alaemnah, ?dun show me kindness... please.?

For Alaemnah that came as hard as any slap could, and she pulled her hand away suddenly. The world suddenly started tunneling out of focus, and she numbly got up and headed to the kitchen.

She could barely hear Nadine as she spoke, ?ya got a new life wit Gun. ya shud embrace im an be happy.?

Though all she wanted to do was run from this, Alaemnah paused in midstride at Nadine?s words. Suddenly it was too much, she continued into the kitchen, trying to keep her legs steady enough to get her there. The door slammed behind her this time. The next sounds heard coming from the kitchen were of things crashing down.

Brutin sat at his desk watching Alaemnah stand there formulating her thoughts. She was desperately trying to understand, to unravel the mystery at the same time he sought to cover it up. But he was powerless now, knowledge belonged to those who sought it and he could no longer hide the truth or cover things up. A light flashed on his phone and he looked up at her as she spoke. "I can't think of anything else to ask at this point, may I come back and ask further questions?" She asked and he nodded, aware that time was ticking away.

"Of course my dear, anytime." He said politely but she stood there considering him. How utterly dramatic. He had to get rid of her before they met and yet he was powerless to be rude. "You must make a decision." He finally said and she came out of her mulling and looked t him. "Leave immediately, hide or sit in a chair." He cautioned her and hoped there was still time left.

"I will go then." Alae said and turned towards the door. Brutin watched her go, the need for answers overpowered by her desire for manners. This would solve the problem, she had chosen to remain ignorant to the last piece of the puzzle that fate had just handed her. But Brutin understood completely, he would have made that same choice as it was the proper thing to do. Her manners were impecable and he was stripped yet again of his defenses around her. She deserved a boon.

"Make it soon, I have an incoming slave set to decompress in here and unless you are prepared to confront she should be here any second." He explained and Alae's eyes widened slightly.

"I better go then." She said and headed for the door quickly. The Boon.

"And do not return tonight or you will get more than you bargained for." He cautioned her and she did not even glance back over her shoulder. Damn her and her impeccable manners, he was powerless, he would have to find a new boon to bestow. He chuckled then, finding himself trying to derail his own cover up. "That woman."

Only a mere moment later Nadine walked into the office, her head down as she plodded slowly over to him and then climbed up into his lap. He wondered as he shifted her around for comfort if she had seen Alae in the hall or walked as a zombie directly past her. "And how did it go tonight little one? Any better?" He asked and for a few seconds he wondered if she had heard him.

"it wus good at first, it wus like nutin ever happened." the girl started to tear up and she laid her face against his chest. Fourth time is a charm.

"It is getting easier to bear now isn't it? You are putting this foolishness behind you and moving onwards." He said and she sobbed against his shirt. My silk, hand tailored shirt...Do not cry little one, you should smile as you come out of the darkness. I know there must be one in there somewhere." He commented but she did not smile.

"but Gun showed up an dey went ta da office gain. she wus gone all nite an den dey left tagether." She continued as if his statement had meant nothing. You could lead a Larl to water but....

"Yes, couples do that from time to time." He said softly and she gripped a handful of shirt and just enough chest hair to wake him up.

"yer making fun of me!" She burst out, her little singsong voice. He regretted having forced Gorean and English on her in so short a time, giving her that dreadful accent. She high pixie voice would have been perfect for her native french accent. She sniffed back tears as she continued, "why does it hurt so much???" There was no answer to that, poets spent life times searching for that one.

"How exactly did you come to love her so much?" He asked her again, he has to make her see the light, help her understand and overcome this foolishness.

Nadine responded by clutching his shirt in a firm grip with that tiny fist of hers and sniffed. "i tole ya, Gun tole me she wanna have sex wit me an dat she luved me. i watched her fer a bit an we got closer, she treated me like she did so i believed it." The memories flitted through her mind as she recited and pain struck her like a sharp blow, she hid her face yet again and her shoulder shook, a faint sob escaped from her. "how cud i be so wrong???"

"Because you desperately needed to believe." Even a candle flicker seems as the sun when you are used to the void. "There is nothing wrong with that." He finished his thought.

"she wans me ta be her frien but he keeps takin her way or makin me act like a slave, but he waits until im havin fun wit her. so he keeps me way from her but he makes me sit in his lap an he kisses me. like nutin happened!" Her voice rose as her emotions tightened. Brutin sat there holding her but she was not the sobbing mess from the last three nights and he clearly heard the soft patter of feet on carpet in the hallway stop at the door to listen. "i hate him!" the outburst caught him by surprise as her tiny fist slammed into his chest. The person in the hall was light, perhaps not barefoot, so not a slave, definitely not one of the Goreans who would have sounded like Godzilla razing Tokyo.

"Nadine, I have told you to stop that. I am going to grow intolerant of that soon enough." He warned her, a very necessary precaution because as she had a tendency to follow through with those feelings.

"i dun care!" She shouted against him and he silently let her go on, venting would help the matter, she needed to vent, it was part of the healing process. "i dun mine losin, but ta rub it in like dat. every nite. an i gotta smile or she goes way ferever. its not fair!" As she got to the end of the tirade her voice rose up, instead of hearing an angry woman however he could only hear wounded child. For all of her years Nadine still looked seventeen and she certainly sometimes acted like it. She burst into tears and he started rocking her as those cleansing emotion filled tears stained his silk, hand tailored shirt.

"You keep going through this night after night and you are going to dehytrate." His attempt at levity garnered him a sniffle from her. Perhaps he could get her mind off of this business and on to new things. A good distraction would be just what Suede would order.

"he is gone now, hes gonna be gone fer a whole week." She continued and he stared at the sand pit. Apparently not. "mebbe he wun come back." Her voice lifted in hope.

"Nadine!" He let his voice rise at this. At what point was hate okay? Nay wishing? Plotting his death? They stacked upon each other and needed to be toppled quickly lest the foundation become too strong.

"i dun know ifn i can go back, its so hard." She said lightly, her face run with tears, she was moving beyond though, she was getting better. He had to make allowances. "she keeps gettin taken way. she dun even luv me like he said. i wus a fool." She said and he brightened, there was the kernel that would save them all. "but shes my frien at least."

"There you go. That is the proper line of thinking. Be grateful for what you do have before it is taken away." He remarked, reminding her of how transient her life could be, how all life could be and she responded by sobbing into his shirt again.

And then Alaemnah stepped into the door and just listened. Nadine's face was turned towards the window so she remained clueless of her presence and Alae did not make herself known. Brutin did not smile but was pleasantly surprised Alae had chosen to partake of his boon. "shes gone...." The girl mused and he looked over at the woman in question watching them both, his eyebrow rising. "ifn i behave she'll come back. i'll be good an she can stay. but he is gonna keep pushin. he wans me too, hes gotta have it all, leave nutin left." She was working things through now, speaking out loud but mostly to herself and suddenly Brutin sat witness much the same way Alae was. "i hate him!" The girl cried out and again her fist pounded his chest and he winced.

"That's new." He commented dryly. "You are already calmer about this. Each day it will be easier to go on." He spoke his thoughts, his eyes locking on Alae so she would understand that those words were meant for her as well, not just the girl in his lap. "Let them go."

"she still luvs me. jus not da kind he said. but i'll take it." She said with a little more energy. A hurdle being leapt.

"And what about Sami?" He threw out there, it was time for a wake up call. "What happened to that love?" He asked.

"she didnt luv me, she pitied me. dey always leave. always!" She cried into his shirt again and that tiny fist balled up as he prepared for another pounding. "wuts wrong wit me??? why do dey hate me???" She finally wondered out loud.

"They do not hate you little one." How do you explain to someone they fall outside a predetermined mindset? "They do not understand you." He said and Alae took a step into the office, there was no denying she was simply passing by now and Brutin kissed the top of Nadine's head. The die was cast.

Nadine picked that very moment to turn her head and shift her body but before she could finish the movement she froze. Her eyes widened as she spotted Alae standing there watching her. "nooooooo."

"Not always." Alae spoke, her voice low, calm, even. Nadine rushed to her feet as Brutin tried to hold her down but she fought him off, his hands slipping off of her arms.

"ya knew she wus here! ya set me up!" Nadine shouted, the betrayal thick in her voice but she turned to face Alae and composed herself as best she could. "yer gonna leave now???" she asked, her voice still trembling.

"No." Utterly confident. Alae just stood there watching her as Nadine fought off the tears building up in her eyes. "Because it's not always...."

"im not gonna cry fer you!" Nadine shouted, her defense against him used on Alae and his eyebrow rose.

"Then don't." She calmly replied to her.

"wuts not always??? i dun unnerstand." Nadine tried to change the subject quickly, controlling the flow of the conversation as best she could.

"You said that they always leave." Alae's voice never faltered, the beacon on the side of the shore ships could sail by and Nadine turned to look at Brutin, her eyes dancing with flames of pent up anger.

"i hate you!" She spat "ya set...." and Brutin did not hesitate, his hand flashed out and slapped her a stinging blow to the face. Nadine cried out in pain and surprise and fell down to the carpet closer to Alae and started crying. "dis is not da way it shud be done...." She said softly but Brutin kept his chair, his face set in the same stone it had been in she had walked in the door.

"What should be?" Alae asked calmly, the slap never registered on her face, if there was pity or sadness there it didn't show, Alae was completely focused on the girl.

"ya shudnt be here. ya dun need ta know dis." Nadine was still sprawled out on the floor, her hand up picking at the carpet under her, her face turned away from them both. Alae finally moved and sat down on the floor next to her.

"Why not?"

"cuz yer gonna hate me an leave." Nadine was calming down, the utter calm Alae exuded effecting all three of them.

"I know you're upset." Alae sat there calm and collected but Brutin marveled at it. He did this same exact thing, that utter confidence and control but he also knew that Alae was a roiling maelstrom of emotion inside. It was like watching himself at work. Alae was putting aside her own thoughts and feelings so that she could concentrate on Nadine's and help her. Nadine continued picking at carpet as Alae continued. "Why would I hate you?"

"im jus a slave, it dun matter." Nadine opened up, she put her fear out there and somehow Brutin did not become defensive, there seemed to be no mistaking that for good or bad, this was necessary and he sat back keeping his mouth shut and observed.

"Says who?" Alae countered.

"cuz i hate da man ya luv." Nadine threw out there to test her reaction.

Alae nodded to her calmly. "That can be a problem." And Nadine sobbed. "But that doesn't mean you don't matter. Or that I'm going to hate you." She continued and Brutin felt chilled, how many times had he done this, the eerie calm Alae exuded effected them both, causing him to sit back and become reflective.

"i dun know wut im doin no more." His eyes flashed to Nadine, there, the last defensive barrier was now gone, the girl was stripped raw down to her very core. She was surrendering. "im so stoopid!"

Alae shook her head slowly. "You're scared. That's different." She calmly put the girl back together again. The tension in her body, the look in her eyes, Alae was making the heroic effort to keep herself together, be calm and collected, to be there for this girl. Brutin did this, as if a maestro but he always played with an agenda set to his own needs. Now he watched it occurring to another for their own benefit. Alae played the same music but for the audience and not the player. Misguided or pure? Were they two sides of the same coin?

"im sad."

"That too." Alae replied.

"im not scared of you. im scared of Gun cuz i can never be wut he wans me ta be an eventually he is gonna blind me." Nadine put out there, the truth was roiling out and Brutin realized the situation was no longer his to command. This situation was now between these two and he was merely an observer, knowing that only disaster could culminate. But then again, he had never expected this either.

"What does he want you to be?"

"an if he does dat he knows Master will be upset so cuz he has nutin ta lose, he'll kill me." Nadine was rambling, her fear causing her to talk quickly but that calm voice cut through her fear and she stopped before replying. "his." A little hesitation as she picked at the carpet but Alae sat there and drew more from her in silence than any demand could glean. "he wans me on da other side of him. you on one side an me onna other." She said and paused. "i cant do dat. ya know how hard dat will be???" Nadine's voice threatened to rise again, emotion mixing with the conversation.

Alae just nodded. "I think I do."

"he tole me he wus gonna watch us have sex an i said ya wud never go fer dat an he said you wud cuz ya luved me. so i watched ya an i thought it wus true. an den he kept keepin me from bein yer frien when he wus round." Nadine said, pouring out the origin of the problem, the crux of the matter. Alae's information was nearly complete and he wondered what she would do with the information. Brutin glanced over at Nadine, her sly attempt to vilify Gun lost when she had surrendered, now all pretense was gone and she just spilled the words out of her mouth finally glad for it.

"Nadine, I'm not sure and this is all new to me..." The words were not defeat and they were not excuses, a simple fact of being overwhelmed but determined to continue.

"an he wud steal ya all nite long an ya wud go ta bed an den he wud make me sit in his lap." Nadine did not want to give up her voice, desperate now that she was listening, and while Alae processed this information she continued to listen.

"You mean the teasing?"

"alla it. no teasin, no talkin gotta use a title, cant play. gotta be da perfect slave fer him or else... or else you'll leave ferever."

"Maybe I can talk to him, to Hex too." Alae offered and caught the girl by surprise. Brutin looked back at Alae and wondered himself but there was that sure knowledge that at least tonight all questions asked would be answered.

"Hex??? why him??? an ifn ya talk ta Gun he will get pissed an i lose ya anyway." The surprise moved aside for practical and then down into depression right before his eyes as Nadine worked through the chain of events that she felt would transpire. "i cant compete, yer gonna leave... yer gone!" Her voice pitched high again even as Alae sought to speak to her through her workup.

"Because for some reason he kept correcting you too tonight whenever you tease me." She said, Brutin knew she meant Hex who would diligently follow the rules. It served as a stark reminder however between following the rules and not. Hex could not act in any way but correctly and could never be faulted, using just enough discipline to obtain the desired result and never more. He was not subject to cruelty.

Nadine burst into tears as she ended her chain of depression and realized there was no way out, no way to survive this with what she truly desired but Alae never faltered. "Nadine. If I don't talk to him because I'm afraid to, nothing is gained but you always being afraid of loosing me. if I do, he may listen and some things will change without my having to leave." She said calmly.

"i'll always be fraid of dat, so mebbe i get lucky." A slight hesitation as Nadine ran the fact through her head. "please dun talk ta him. i promise ta be good. i'll do wutever he says. please???" So willing to give up everything just to spend that last ounce of time with someone, ready to endure hell for a smile or kind word. This was why he would not allow himself to traffic in this nonsense. Rip your own chest open and toss insults at your own heart, it had the same effect.

"I'll tell you what. When you get ready for me to talk to him about this, I will."

The words penetrated Nadine's panic and she made a conclusion born of fear. "kay...dat is good... when im ready." She closed her eyes and swallowed. She was going to live through this after all. "thans." Alae just nodded as she sat there calmly. "im sorry."

"But I want you to think about this. I asked him to let you tease me and he did." Alae offered up, trying to put her positive spin on things. Brutin knew it wouldn't work but he had tried to same himself, he would not disparage her of her attempt.

ya, cuz he said i cud." Nadine said, the fear still there, the seeds growing. "hes gonna try ta dominate me an i gotta let him. him!" She said and sniffled while Alae sat there pondering that. "can ya do me a favor." Nadine's voice had gone soft, emotion having weakened her.

"I can try." No promise, just hope.

"dun try ta luv me ifn ya dont, an dun be nice ta me. it jus makes it worse. if i gotta give ya up, i wanna do it now." Nadine said and Alae gave her an unseen quirky smile and Brutin himself mirrored from his spot. Expertly guided through the morass of hurt and sadness, so much had already been healed here already and yet there was more to be done.

"I'm going to have to work on the not being nice one. Gotta tell you, that one is tough." Alae admitted and Nadine snorted.

"at least tell me ya dun luv me so i can stay way. den ya dun haveta be mean. i dun like ya mean." Another offer to flee and Brutin sat there with baited breath. Alae could free herself from this burden and save future pain if she got to her feet and walked out that door without saying another word. All night long she had acted just as Brutin did, showing that same kind of skills of observation and rhetoric, placing everything in the open and mending wounds. Would she be like him and turn away from love and protect herself from that disaster or would she embrace it?

"Me, mean, bad on the pots and pans for sure." Alae quipped and Nadine started to giggle and then went silent.

"stop it." A little girl's admonishment.

"Can I tell you what I told Brutin the other day?" Alae offered as the wounds closed before his eyes.

"kay..."

"I love you. Plain and simple. I don't know what that means or what it will mean later. I just do." Nadine heard the words and smiles, her face still on the carpet, her fingers still picking hole in his beloved carpet. "And love doesn't just go away. There's room for one more always."

"jus a little???" Nadine hoped.

"you, gun, the baby, Brutin, Rishi, Ammy, each of you." Alae added and Nadine kept picking while Brutin sat there watching in his tear stained silk hand tailored shirt.

"but me first???" Nadine asked and Alae smiled. The first signs of a positive upswing for the night, victory. "ya dun haveta answer dat." Nadine allowed solemnly.

You first. You were the first one to make me feel safe here." Alae allowed and Nadine perked up immediately.

"ya mean dat???" She asked and Alae nodded. Nadine turned to look at her and then got up to her feet. "can i hug ya???" She asked and Alae got to her feet."

"You never have to ask that." And Nadine hugged her tightly, feeding off of the strength Alae displayed, the sure confident attitude, the easy manner, tenderness and concern. Brutin understood now just what is was that made Alae so effective. Now he understood her innate qualities. And he could only sit there and observe.

Alae returned the hug and smiled to her. "Feeling any better?"

"yeah....lots. thans. im still scared...but ifn yer not goin way den its okay." Nadine admitted.

"Nadine, if you need to talk to me about being afraid that I'm going to leave, it's ok. Just talk to me." Alae offered and Nadine did not skip a heartbeat.

"im fraid yer goin way."

Alae nodded back, not skipping a beat either. "I know. But I'm not leaving today. And you have a whole week of me not leaving for sure." Nadine smiled at that.

"no Gun."

"And each day that I'm here, that fear may grow less." Alae continued but Nadine's eyes grew wide and she put her head down embarrassed.

"im sorry."

"No Gun." Alae allowed and then heard the apology. "Why?"

"i know ya luv him an i wan ya ta be happy."

"Yes I do and I am. I'm just a little less happy when you're sad." Alae said and Nadine smiled to her.

"im happy now."

"Good." Alae said nodding. "But don't just be happy so I will be and sad on the inside, ok?"

The girls left him to his thoughts, the things he had seen and felt through that exchange. It was bewildering to observe love in its many facets but there was no denying feeling it. It was a strong and heady thing. He stood up and walked over to his window, glancing out at the moon covered garden and silently marveled at how tragedy shaped them all.

Brutin looked up as Nadine padded back in and looked over her shoulder as if waiting for someone who never showed. He watched her calmly as she stood there silently and then finally looked at him a look crossing her face. He sat back in his chair and waited patiently as she stepped closer to the desk. "ya cant let her do dis Master." She pleaded with him.

"It is her choice. Why would I stand in the way? Besides, you will betray her trust and she will be faced with punishment. Let us see just how long that love lasts." He said and she gasped in surprise.

"ya cant be serious, yer usin dis ta break us up??? why???" Her face fell away in shock but Brutin simply frowned.

"Do not presume." He warned her and she moved around the desk and knelt at his feet, looking up into his face pitifully, her eyes begging.

"please Master, do anythin ya wan ta me, dun let her do dis." She pleaded and he sat there looking down into her face.

"It is not my choice." He reminded her.

Her face darkened and her head dropped slightly as she spoke. "cant ya take way her ownership til she sees reason???" Brutin's eyes widen slightly at the request.

"Why would I do that?" He asked her and it was her turn to react in surprise.

"Master! ya cant be serious, ya know she cant be beat now." She admitted and he smiled down to her.

"Precisely, so why do we not see if she is willing to take it. You push too hard Nadine. You get people hurt everyday and sometimes you organize their deaths. She has to know what you do, who you are and be willing to react accordingly." He explained.

"but she dun care bout all dat! she jus luvs me." She retorted, safe in her little world.

"And do you love her back?" He asked, setting the trap.

"yes, wit all my heart." She admitted quickly, without hesitation.

"Then if she is willing to forget what you are, you also need to forget what you are. Otherwise I shall have no mercy." He warned her and she dropped her head.

"yer so cruel sumtims." She said softly. "why wud ya do dis ta her???"

"I give people choices and all them to choose, I do not shirk from their decisions anymore than they can. Alae has been given her choice and she has made it, now we will see if she can live with it." He said calmly.

Nadine suddenly stiffened in her spot at his feet, her fists balled up and a look of defiance came over her features. She was making a choice of her own. "im not gonna let ya, im gonna stop ya." She warned him.

"Watch your tone." He warned her right back. "Your relationship with her is destined to fail in the first place. There is no way it is going to survive on its present course. You know that." He chided her but she was a pillar of strength in that tiny little body.

"yeah??? well ya didnt know i made a deal wit Gun an hes gonna leave me an Alae lone an ill pretend he dominated me. ill do wutever he says so long as i get my time wit Alae an dat means we survived!" She shot back and Brutin blinked, thinking back to his earlier conversation with Gun about that very topic.

"How interesting." He said as he reflected on it. "Do you really think Gun is going to willingly take second seat?" He asked her and she shrugged in return, displaying she knew the answer without saying it.

"not my problem, he promised." She said and Brutin smiled at that.

"And he needs to keep his word to you why? You are a slave. Do not be foolish." He teased her and her face screwed up in anger and frustration.

"dun make fun of me!" She shouted at him. ya thin ya can rub it in when dey treat me like dirt but i finally found sumwun who dun do dat an it bothers ya!" She kept up her voice level, her fist balled against his pant leg.

"I do not believe it exists, and I do not want you getting your hopes up and having them dashed. I would rather find out here in the beginning that it is fake and let you recover. I am trying to protect you." He allowed and she frowned.

"well dun! ill pertect Alae, ifn anywun gets in da way ill kill em!" She spat venomously.

"Nadine." He cautioned her.

"im serious, im tired of ya takin my friens way from me, but she luvs me an ya cant stand it." She continued.

Nadine, enough. One more utterance like that and I will have Alae beaten, she is not so far along now to not appreciate the irony." He threatened her and watched as her face screwed up and her fists tightened.

"yer already usin it as a weapon gainst me."

"Of course."

"well, ya messed up! it only works dat way while yer gone. yer rite here, so it dun count." She shot back and Brutin sighed inwardly. Verbal threats would not work then, so be it.

"Are you sure that is your opinion?"

"opinion??? its da truth. its da way it works. so ya cant use her as a weapon gainst me." She said triumphantly, her face bright at having won the argument.

"No need to. Bring me my whip." He said calmly.

Her face dropped slightly, the color fell away and her fire died out. She closed down her defenses and got up, going over to the wall and instead of taking the whip down with her hands, she used her teeth, her execution flawless. She would not give him another excuse. She stepped back over to him and then spat the whip into his lap in a sudden act of defiance. "yer not gonna bully me!" She exclaimed and he had to give her that much.

"Go to the middle of the floor and strip." She turned without another word, back to flawless execution after having made her wishes made known and pulled the pretty dress Alae had given her off.

"ya dun gotta tell me, i know dis part." She reminded him and he stood up came around the desk, unfurling the whip. Nadine folded the dress neatly and set it aside before kneeling on the floor, her legs and arms underneath her, her hair thrown over her head and away from her back which was now in a pretty bow.

Brutin stood there looking at that flawless skin and took out her last hope. "Nadine, you are not distracting me from the issue. You are not saving Alae. You are worried and freaking out about her unnecessarily. You will now be punished for no reason." He told her and her muscles flexed.

"i dun care!" She shot back holding her ground. Pride swelled in his chest as Brutin brought the whip down harshly across her back. He delivered another four strokes to her and she only allowed a yelp at his hardest stroke.

"I hope you are happy now." He said looking over her red wealed back but she remained where she was without moving.

"wimp." She said fainted as she spoke to the floor. He lashed her twice more in quick succession. She tried to growl at him but it came out a groan. "im not gonna cry fer ya." She fell back on her old warcry as she reached her limit.

"See to it you do not. They will not sway me." He said and added an eight lash to her back. She moaned under the punishment and clutched at air as she dealt with the pain. Brutin dropped the whip at his feet and stepped down to his knee slightly behind her, both of his hands forming a wall as he placed them on her lower back just above her butt and ran them up her spine, dragging over those welts as she cried out in pain and fire. She broke position and kicked out of his grip, rolling away from him as one hand went to her back, pain limiting her escape. "Kneel." He said firmly and she struggled quickly to the proper kneeling position, her back straight and her posture perfect.

The battle of wills continued, she showed no spark of rebellion, no defiance. He bent down and picked up the whip, holding it in front of her face. She bent forward and gently kissed the whip, there was no denying its discipline and she paid the proper respects, against flawlessly, giving him no reason to find fault in her except where she chose him to.

"Now put it away and only use your teeth." He instructed her and she leaned back forward, taking the whip in her teeth and getting up, padding over to the sconce in the wall where the whip resided and placed it where it belonged. Slaves trained for hours for this very reason. He walked back to his desk and sat down watching her. Flawless. She walked back to the middle of the room where she had been whipped and knelt.

She settled herself into the kneeling position and he glanced over her again, flawless execution. "ya better not hurt her." She remarked calmly and Brutin sighed. It was going to be a long night.

"Get the whip."

Part 1

i wus standin behind da bar when Gun walked in a rite pas me witout sayin a word straight ta da office in back. i watched him go an wunnered wut wus goin on but Alae suddenly came runnin in lookin concerned. "I need to talk to you. Has Gun gotten here yet?" she asked me. my blood froze, sumthin wus wrong.

i followed her inta da kitchen an she turned ta face me, bitin her lower lip an i cudnt help but swallow da lump in my throat. "Nadine, remember when I said that if you push Gun I would leave?" the words left her lips an i felt da floor come rushin up ta me but sumhow i didnt fall down.

"i aint pushed him. i swear." i prayed she wud listen ta me, he wus lyin if he said i did. she reached out an took my hand.

"I know hon. Trust me, I know. I'm not going anywhere. Remember that. I'm not going anywhere." she reassured me an i felt my poundin heart start ta settle.

"yer not??? den why didja brin it up???" i wanned ta yell at her. "wut da hell is goin on??? yer scarin me!" i managed ta get out an she frowned.

"i don't know if anything will happen or not, but if you think you need to push back I won't be angry and I won't leave." she said an my heart leapt. i wus free ta defend myself. i wusnt trapped no more. i leaned gainst da counter an put my face in my hands an i cud feel myself start ta shake. Alae came over an hugged me an i felt her warmth an did my best not ta break down.

"ya totally freaked me out. yer actin strange an i almost cried." i admitted ta her.

"I totally freaked myself out." she kissed me onna forehead. "I know. But I was worried about you." she said back.

"ifn yer so worried bout me, take bak yer order. da wun bout ya takin my place fer punishment. its stoopid." i tole her gain, i had ta find a way fer her to reverse dis.

"No. That one I won't take back, whether you think it is stupid or not." she warned me an i wus gonna shake my head but i didnt.

"but ya dun unnerstand, yer puttin herself in da wrong spot. yer gonna lose an den yer gonna hater yerself for doin it, den yer gonna hate me an den your gonna leave." i worked it all out fer her so she cud see but she shook her head.

"My choice, not yours and so hating you would be stupid. And as for me leaving, not for that." she said an i panicked gain, dere wus a reason out dere ta leave den an i didnt know wut it wus, it wus jus hangin over my head.

"an wut ifn Master makes ya get punished anyways??? wut bout da baby???" i had ta remind her who she wus up gainst an wut he cud do.

"Are you saying that if he goes on another trip, for the few days he's away, you can't behave yourself?" she teased me an i closed my eyes, she didnt see da trap.

"im gonna do my best, but yanno he aint gonna wait, hes gonna push an trap ya soes ya gotta make da choice. i tried ta stop im but it didnt work." i said an cud still feel las nte. i thought i cud wear him out, i wus wrong. Alae wus staring at me, wantin answers. "i jus went ta him an tried ta reason wit him an i los, he wun listen ta me. he says its yer choice." i left out da important parts she didnt need ta know cuz she wud jus worry or go confront him an den he wud try harder.

"He's right. It is. If is' not this, it will be something else, you know that as well as I do. My even having part ownership of you is his test. And my choice." she said an i had ta agree wit dat, he wus locked in. wut were we gonna do???

"he aint tryin ta trap ya, he jus wans ta test ya but yer doin it stoopid, yer riskin yerself an i know wut im gettin inta, ive had a long time ta get used ta it." i tole her but she jus looked at me.

"I can make you not be mine as easily as he made you mine." she said an i felt my heart drop an my eyes go wide as saucers.

"ya wud toss me way??? why???" i cud feel myself sweatin now, none of dis made sense ta me, sumthin wus goin on.

"But I don't want to because this way I get something special I can't have the other way. I get to have those special rules that let you be with me the way we want." she said an i wus so confused.

"man, yer scarin me." i tole her. she tole me da story bout da storm gain, yer a tree an break unner da storm or like grass an bend ta survive it. "i cant thin of dat, cuz ifn ya break yer gone. ya can never leave. i already set it up, thins are fine." i tole her an she turned her head ta da side, studyin my face.

"How so?"

"its okay, ya dun need ta know dat." i said, hopin she didnt push it. "jus trust me, kay??? ya made yer choice an i made mine." i tole her an tried ta calm down, she didnt know yet, i fixed it.

"Slaves don't get choices." Gun said as he stepped inta da kitchen, he had been listenin in, i didnt like his tone an i really wunnered wut wus goin on. "Tell her." Gun said ta Alae as she kissed me on da forehead but i kept my attention on him, he wus da dangerous wun. i gave her hand a squeeze ta reassure her, i had dis fixed.

"tell her??? our agreement??? arent ya scared she'll be mad???" i put out dere, he didnt wan her ta know an neither did i, but she wus gonna get mad at him, not me.

"No. Because I know she'll be mad. Do I have to repeat myself?" he said an i blinked at dat, he wus tryin ta be a master gain. he wus bein a tough guy an gonna force his way threw dis.

"kay. i made an agreement wit Gun ta be slave ta him in every way. in return he wud give us space. so ya dun gotta worry bout Master." i said dis las part cuz i wus nervous how he wud take dat. i wud whore myself out ta be wit Alae, i didnt even regret it, i wud let him pretend ta dominate me an den i cud have wut mattered. Alae.

"I was wondering how far she was going to go. And then I realized it when she tried to get me to be the one to punish you if you took her place." Gun said an looked at Alae. his words were like salt but i closed my wounds round him, ya i set him up, ifn he hit her like he hit me, she was gonna be jus fine. "Even let harm come to her."

"i tole ya i wud do anythin fer her." i said an den dat las part he said caught me an i looked at him. "i didnt say dat, dats yer fear....master." i added quickly, he wus paintin an ugly picture ta her, how far cud i defend myself??? "im gonna keep her safe."

"Gun." Alae warned him but he didnt listen.

"No you won't. Because if it comes down to a situation where I would have to treat her the way I would treat you in punishment, you'll find that it will be in the most literal sense. As if you were rebelling and pulling the leash." he said an looked at Alae as my mouth hung open in stunned silence. "Call me a bastard or whatever you like... but this is the test. You put your fate in the hands of a slave who pushes the limits." he said an i gasped, he found his manhood now??? he wus gonna put his foot down now when Alae wus da target insteada me???

"I call you nothing." Alae said bak, lettin him know she didnt feel bad towards him. well ya shud!

"And I still love you and I want to build a future with you and grow old together watching our child mature. I'd even kill a man in cold blood so that it is possible. I'd re-open the doors to the darkness of my soul that I had closed forever. You've made your choice." he said an looked at me. "Now you have to live with it. And I've made my choice. I have to live with it also. Or die trying." he said an i didnt like da look he gave me. he wus squarin off gainst me like he wus gonna attack. "The only one who doesn't is her." he pointed at me an i blinked at dat. "She doesn't get a choice." he said an i swallowed a lump in my throat an steadied myself, he wanned ta fight.

Alae squeezed my hand an i drew strength from dat an squeezed it bak. "Actually she does. What happens after a choice is made is what makes us." Alae said an i shuddered, she sounded jus like Master. it wus eerie how close she wus ta him sumtimes.

"I agree about the latter...not the former." he said an i jus watched him, content ta let Alae deal wit him for me.

"She made a choice when she came to you to make this agreement. For well or ill." she tole him.

"why are ya mad bout it???" i asked him tryin ta unnerstand.

"Does it look like I'm mad?" he asked throwin a thumb at himself.


"den yer bein mean. is dat wut ya wan master???" i asked him an kept it neutral.

"I'm actually tickled a bit., thinking that she expects me to willingly play second banana. You know, the whipping was so loud last night I couldn't sleep." i closed my eyes, i wus rite, he wus gonna ruin alla dis fer everywun gain, den my eyes flashed open at da las part. i felt a cold shiver run up my spine as he looked at me.

Alae caught on. "With whom?" her voice wus flat. she wanted answers an i stepped bak feelin his hostility jus as he leaned forward ta get in my face.

"Brutin was nice enough to let me view the memory orb. You'd kill anyone to protect Alae...even me...right?" he asked me an i gasped, he wus makin stuff up as he went, twistin my words. "Answer." he demanded as i opened my mouth ta reply. he wus anxious, pushin. dis wus not goin well.

"yer no danger ta her why wud i kill ya??? ya thin im tryin ta kill ya?? but master, wut bout da agreement??? thins are fixed." i tried to remind him dat we had already covered dis part, wut wus he tryin ta do???

"I wouldn't doubt it for a second if you had a chance. I don't bargain with slaves." he said an da floor started ta drop way from me but den he looked at a kitchen knife, my eyes followin him an i felt terror seize me. i had ta escape! he wus gonna kill me! "You could grab a frying pan and hit me in the head...kill me even." he said an i wished i had, i wished i had killed him an wus safe now.

"...i can't kill ya an i can't hit ya wit a fryin pan." i said, tryin desperately ta hold on ta a dyin hope.

"And why is that? Don't you want to protect Alae?" he pushed an i got confused.

"why does usin a fryin pan gainst ya mean i save Alae???" i asked him tryin ta shift his attention offa da knife.

"Because even if you try your best, you will slip up. You even slip up in Brutin's presence." he threw bak at me.

"are ya gonna hurt her???" my worst fear wus dat his hatred of me he wud take out on her. i cudnt stand dat.

"As I said...I will treat her as if it were you on your most rebellious day." he said so calmly his face didnt show any emotion at all. fine, he wus useless ta us, i cudnt rely on him, i shuda know dat.

"so den we find sumwun else ta punish her an ya dun haveta get angry." i said an started thinkin of others who wud help.

"The result would not change...you'd still fail to protect her. But..." he said an looked from me ta Alae. "That was your choice hon." he said.

"It was." she agreed all too calmly, didnt she realize he wus gainst her now cuza me???

"And she knew it was a crime for someone to punish you while you were with child." he threw out dere an i rolled my eyes, he wus out ta shatter dis in a million pieces.

i had ta get outta here fas, his temper, dat knife, da way he wus talkin, i cudnt breathe an i wusnt gonna break down an trust him no more. "i better let ya two talk." i said an left quikly, he wud haveta come after me way from da knife ifn he didnt like dat. i went ta a table well way from da kitchen door an leaned on it, tryin ta steady myself, my arms, my whole body was shakin.

Part 3

"Kneel." Gun said an i knelt numbly, my face turnin from da door of da Kurii ta straight ahead.

"master?" i asked, needin ta know. "when she isa slave are ya gonna keep her way from me???"

"Why would I need to keep her away from you? There is a part of me girl that wishes that we all can be happy. However...Last night's events put me in a very bad position. It put us all in a bad position. When Alae said in an attempt to get you to behave that whatever misbehaving you did she would take the punishment instead of you. And I'm more amazed that you would try to bargain with her to ahve me bestow the punishment. Even more suprised....That you'd try to bargain with Brutin. Which is why we have arrived here with my intention."

we

"Please get me some water girl." he said an den stared at me as i got up an went ta da bar an fetched him a glass of water. i still had we floatin round my head as i brought it bak ta him. "This is quite refreshing." he said but i wus off in my own land, barely listenin in case he gave a command. "no anger or sadness in your voice??? No will to smack me around with a frying pan? No defiance at all?" he finally asked me, he had been baitin me ta fight bak.

"wuts dat point??? ya really wan me ta get up an smack ya round so ya can return da favor???" wus he serious??? he outweighed me by over twice my weight an i didnt know how ta fight. "jus order it."

he leaned close in gain, he liked doin dat. "The point is watching your willpower's foundation fall." he said.

"keep waitin." i managed ta throw out dere. it wus all i cud muster. an he slapped me gain. i jus looked forward an wunnered ifn my heart wus ever gonna beat gain, i still cudnt feel it.

"Sad...you've either given up...or don't love Alae." he baited me sum more.

"i keep my promises." i said half live.

"Promises?"

"i promised ta be a good lil slave round ya so i cud be wit her." i said an knew he had already broken his word.

"You protect Alae by putting her in danger... that hardly seems like a promise." he wus a wun song man an wusnt listenin anyway. he only wanned wun thin.

"she aint in danger." i said numbly.

"I'm wrong then? Bring the whip." he said an i got up, he had finally worked up his courage an i went ta da wall an plucked down a whip wit my hand, a small spark he wud never see. let him pretend. i took it bak ta him an he pointed ta da middle of the tavern. "In the middle of the room, kneel...and expose your back." he said playin wit da whip.

i went ta da middle an stripped off my dress cuz i didnt wan it mussed an den knelt. "please master, be gentle, im still sore." i said ta remind him i wus beaten las nite. he wudnt ease up an i knew it but now he wud know it wusnt him dat broke me down, it wus sumwun else fore him. he laid da lash cross my back just like dat an i jumped in surprise, my hair wus in da way an da tails wrapped round ta my sides. "dun ya wan me in whippin position??" i asked him so he wud let me get proper.

"A free person shouldn't be challenged by a slave even if wrong correct?" he cracked da whip on da floor near me an i jumped espectin him ta hit me gain.

"it depends master, sumtimes dey wan dat, sumtimes dey dun. its up ta each free person." i said takin da wind outta his sails.

"Whipping position." he said an i thanfully leaned over an saved my hair, i wud haveta check fer damage later. "Disrespect and not properly addressing me...you will receive 3 lashes.. and 1 master's lash to remind you of your collar. Do you understand girl?" he asked me imperiously but i wus in position now an my thoughts flitted bak ta las nite.

"yes master..." he gave me two more strokes an my bak wus on fire, da old welts still dere an i fought not ta cry, he wud definitely thin dat wus his an i wudnt do dat, not fer him, not fer anywun. da las stroke he put his full force inta it an my bak esploded in fire leavin me clenchin fists gainst da pain.

"Do you wish to see Alae girl?" i nodded ta him. "Then go." he said as i dressed an quikly left da Kurii. i got ta da office an saw Master sittin at his desk like always, Alae sittin in a chair cross from him an i stopped.

"am i disturbin Master???" i asked him but he shook his head.

"I'll leave you two alone. good evening." Alae said an i stopped.

"can i ask a question???" i asked an she stopped.

"yes." she said.

"yer still my frien???" i asked her, cuz i wanned ta know if it wus all gone, all of it a lie. she turned about and looked at me, a confused look on her face. i looked at her an tried ta esplain. "i mean rite now in dis place, cuz Master's here. im not a slave, im yer frien is wut im asking." i said an she nodded so i went ta her. "i jus..." wut wus dere ta say???

I slapped her inna face an Master let his eyebrow rise in surprise but Alae didnt move an didnt say nutin. "dats all i had ta say" i said an crawled inta Master's lap facin way from her. she stood there fer a bit an then i cud hear her walkin fer da door. i buried my face in his chest. "yer not gonna make me cry." i tole her, she cudnt break me down neither.

Gun wus dere, i dun know when he got in or wut he saw. "Leave Alae...? What just happened?" i kept my head turned way, wunnerin wut her face looked like, ifn she hurt as much as me. no way.

"Just one surprise after another it would seem." Master said an i cud feel the rumble in his chest.

"someone won, and someone lost." she said an i dug in deeper wishin i cudnt hear her, not her words, Gun's words, dat filthy poison.

"Let's go." Gun said i heard dem leave over da soft carpet.

i cried.

Part 1
I found myself for what seems like what was becoming habit, having to make myself walk down the street toward the Kurii. I knew this wasn?t going to be easy, but to keep from loosing any courage I had, I only paused a moment as I drew near the building. At least this time my eyes were not swollen from crying myself to sleep. Taking one last deep breath and releasing it, I braced myself and stepped inside. My first view was of Nadine standing behind the bar, dressed in the school girl outfit Vyper had given her as she filled the pitcher with water and then wiped the counter down. What Nadine was wearing now spoke volumes, and I had reconfirmed to me that this was not going to be easy.

At first I had decided to head toward the kitchen, gather my wits and maybe a little courage for what was to come. So that was the direction I headed with a simple, if not cheery, ?good evening.?

When Nadine responded with, ?hiya mistress, water?? my heart felt like it had taken a leap into my throat.

I stood at the door between the main room and the kitchen for what seemed like hours, but could only have been a few seconds before responding, ?no.?

I didn?t really hear her response, or even if she made one at that point. I also didn?t go into the kitchen. Instead I found myself seated at the end of the bar, ?I want to ask you something.?

?yes mistress,? I tried to swallow as she said that. So distant, and cool, like she and I were nothing more than mere acquaintances and never had been, or maybe that she wished we never had been.

Still, I found I had to press on. Giving up just seemed to easy and too much of a coward?s way to me, ?Why did you slap me last night??

To that Nadine gave me the answer I expected. It wasn?t that I needed the answer, I knew it as well as she, ?cuz ya lied ta me.? What I did need to know was whether there was still a chance to be friends, still time to get to know her and maybe correct the mistake I had made.

I knew I needed her to tell me then which lie I had told her, so I asked. Her response gave me the opening I needed, ?dat ya wud never go way.?

There was no turning back now. She had spoken the truth, and I was more than willing to face that. I hoped that in the end she wouldn?t tell me to go away because of it, ?I'm sorry for that. I didn't see a reason until last night.? I didn?t offer an excuse, there was none. I had made that promise to her, and then left her. I could explain my reasoning and hope that she could understand it, ?I was afraid that if I stayed after Gun told me to go, you wouldn't be facing him, you would be facing his anger.?

What Nadine said sliced neater than any blade could, ?its okay, it wus more effective dis way. i got yer message, trust me.?

I couldn?t help it though, I had to be sure, and so I asked, ?What message?? Her fear. Being abandoned, and I had done it to her.

She was talking now, so it was plunge straight on, ?an i faced his anger anyway.? Then there was a pause before she answered, ?dat yer leavin. dat dis,? and she pointed between us, ?wusnt meant ta be. i unnerstand dat.?

?Says who??

?ya did. sumwun hadta win an sumwun hadta lose. i lose, i get it.?

She had heard the words, but I realized she had missed the intended meaning. She hadn?t been there when I had spoken to Gun. She wouldn?t understand that it was meant for him, not her, ?That wasn't what I meant.? He had done this without his heart in it, only his fear for me. That wasn?t enough of a reason to do it. Now, it seemed that no one would win when it could have been everyone who had won and no losses.

?look...mistress...ya gave me a message an den left me wit him. dere aint nutin more ta say.?

I folded my arms on the counter and propped my chin on them. And she continued, ?he wun.?

Nothing more to say? Wanna bet? ?Yeah, there is.? She said something, I?m not sure what, because now it was my turn. If I was going to loose everything, it wasn?t going to be without a fight, ?Because last night I lost a friend, and I'm not ready for that.? I sat back up and this time there was a bit of anger in my words. Not at Nadine, but at this whole stupid situation that never should have been, ?So there's plenty more to say.?

She just stood there in silence watching me. Tears welled up in her eyes and I had to clench my teeth to stop them. I knew that if I let just one fall, they wouldn?t stop and I would never get through this, ?I'm not ready to give up a friend over a fear. Not even three fears. Yours that I can't do what I said. His that you'll push and get in trouble. Or mine that I'm going to loose you before I get to really know you.?

Nadine just rolled her eyes at my little outburst, ?ya dun get it. we already los. ya said it yerself.? She could always be so pragmatic about things.

Still I had only one real question, if it were to be that way, no matter what, what good was the test? ?why??

Her answer was simple and quite reasonable actually. ?Gun is already usin ya gainst me. yer gonna be his slave. da moment ya become a slave yer gone forever.? Now it was time for her to barely hear me as she continued her explanation, ?i lose dis special status an ya got no choice.?

I knew it had all needed to be said. I even had to acknowledge that there was some fear for me that this would be the case. Now I knew that I wasn?t alone in that fear and I watched as Nadine took a deep breath to continue voicing what also scared her, ?he said ifn i do wutever he says his way den we wun find out ifn he'll kill me. i dun wanna die. but if he killed me Master wud kill him. an den ya lose everythin.? That last one was a new one for me to hear. I wished at that moment that Gun had been here to listen to this.

Instead, I had to press forward and alone, so I stepped behind the bar and was met with her resistance, ?dun touch me. im not gonna cry fer ya.?

There was anger, hurt and betrayal under her words. If what I had in mind happened, I wasn?t likely to be left standing without some sort of support. So I leaned against the counter, my hands going to it as I stated, ?That's alright. I'm not asking for you to cry.?

What a nice evening, nice clear skies.

Beggars are leaving me alone, and the Nexus Thermae has been doing well. Dust kicked up a bit on my boots as my steps took me to the Marketplace.

When I finally got to the Kurii, I stopped in my tracks before opening the door. Much like the nights before, when I find that the door is closed most of the time there's a conversation going on by the two girls that are in my life. Tonight was no different, I could over hear my darling Alaemnah's voice chatting away with Nadine. Didn't feel like I needed to barge in at the time, so unless there was some slapping going on... it really wasn't worth it to reveal my presence.

-------------

"I need time... time to help Gun see that your love will keep you true." Alaemnah said with a numb tone as someone had just slapped her.

"He ain't listenin." replied Nadine.

"Even if he went about it the wrong way. His heart is in the right place. He hears with his heart, not his fear." spoke out Alae.

-------------

How ironic, he thought to himself. It would be stereotypical for him to be the subject of conversation regarding not listening to anyone... and here he was listening to the conversation.

These were Words which echoed the key to dominance according to Brutin regarding the relationship of Master and Slave. It wasn't typical to make second guesses, the situation is delicate.

Johnny Cash had it easy but how to walk the line?

-------------

"Now, what is this unfinished business that he spoke of?" inquired Alaemnah.

Nadine huffed, "He is tryin ta dominate me an i wun fight him. im not gonna get beat up or killed fer sumthin i wus gonna give him anyway, hes gonna pay fer my compliance now i got no reason ta let him in."

-------------

Huh... she was going to give it to me? Really...? Well, either way things were about to get really interesting I'd say.

There are so many friggin' things that I've got to do. Need to start training for the mission back on Earth. I have to do some renovations on the Thermae's boilers.

Wait... what did Alaemnah just say?

-------------

"Give him what he wants, and you might find that we all win. Give him nothing and we definitely all lose."

"He gets a slave... nutin more." plainly retored the kajira.

Concerned, Alae inquired further... "No more discussion of this for now. Has your back been tended to?"

"Its healin, da blades of da whip dun cut, dey jus really hurt"

"But there are some things that can dull that pain Nadine."

"Ha, like thinkin bout yer boyfrien. dat dulls da senses. wut bout us?"

-------------

Okay, that's enough. Time to check on the Thermae...

i wus foldin bedsheets wit Lyria talkin bout Cookie an Vorn when i saw Lyria's eyes widen an suddenly dere wus hands on my arms, yankin me bak way from da sheets. i wus turned round an dere wus Philodus standin dere watchin me wit a scowl on his face. "Were you in the Pool Room last night?" he asked an i dipped my head, i knew dis wus comin.

"yes master." I said an Philodus started walkin outta da room an down da hallway. i wus held by two guards an dey carried me long wit dem, holdin me up offa da floor by da arms. Philodus turned inta Master's office an i got ready fer wut wus gonna happen but i wus still scared. dey threw me ta da floor an my left leg skimmed da carpet, burnin. idiots. dat hurt.

i got ta a proper kneelin position an kept my head down, Master wus sittin at his desk like usual, a full glass of brandy in its usual spot. he wusnt happy. "Every single pane of glass in the pool house was burst." he said calmly an i kept my head down not makin eye contact. "Would you care to tell me how that happened?" he asked me an i shook my head. not on yer life buddy. he waited in dat calm manner dat said he had all day but time wus countin gainst me. i made him wait jus long nuff ta make him thin i wus considerin my options an den lowered my head even further.

"it wus me Master, i decided ta knock out da winnows wit rocks." i said an i cud feel da sudden increase of heat inside da office. boy wus he mad.

"The glass was burst in inside." he commented an i shrugged.

"i wus outside tryin ta get da rocks inna pool." i tole him.

"I have reports that you were with Alae, where was she for all of this?" he asked an my heart started beatin fas.

"she didnt have a suit ta wear so we were nekkid. Gun came in a dey started makin out an den Gun carried her ta his room. i wus frustrated an so i ran round knockin out da winnows." i said softly, puttin as much sorrow as i cud muster inta it witout goin overboard. Master sat dere watchin me fer a while.

"This business between you, Gun and Alae. I already told you how to settle this, if you are going to keep damaging my property when you get frustrated then I am the one, and now you, who is going to pay for this relationship. I have kept my nose out of it until now. I must pay for damages that I myself have caused." he said, dat wus da law, i cud not commit crimes, he did on my behalf. so i broke da winnows, it wus his responsibility ta fix em. "I shall provide a fund to which these windows and any further damage may be taken out from. I know that you were seen cleaning up the mess afterwards so I am going to be light on you, considering you have already shown remorse." he said an i shivered, he wus real mad. i didnt espect it ta be dis bad.

"im sorry Master." i interrupted him since he hadnt made his decision yet an den turned my palms over on my thighs, showin em ta him an anywun else lookin. he saw it an nodded, acceptin it an i breathed a sigh of relief silently.

"You will receive five lashes of the whip and then you will be dragged down to the barber an shorn to the neck. Your hair will be sold to create the fund." he said an my whole body turned cold as if all life seeped from me, my head shot up an my mouth opened ta take it all bak. da two guards behind me grabbed me an picked me up, i wus numb, dere had ta be a way outta dis, it wus way too severe.

Master wus suddenly in my face, he showed no emotion which scared me an he reached ta my shirt an pulled, da buttons snapped off an i heard dem hit da floor. dey had taken me ta da tile part of da floor, way from da carpet. da shirt came open an in horror i realized Vyper's present ta me, dis beautiful outfit wus bein destroyed. Master grabbed my skirt an pulled, da button shot off an he yanked da material apart an i wusnt sure he hadnt destroyed da zipper.

i wus nekkid an den dey threw me ta da floor an i gritted my teeth gainst da pain. i curled in on myself an flipped my hair outta da way, knowin ifn he wus dis mad he wudnt be thinkin a jus as i got my hands unner me da first lash struck. i jumped an felt fire on my bak but jus settled myself. it didnt feel like Master whippin me, dis guy wus no good. da second lash wus real hard an i felt my wind burst outta me, i wus gulpin fer air an knew it wus Master after all, he had tricked me ta let my guard down. da third wun wus down lower near my butt an tears stung my eyes but i fought em off. da fourth had me twistin my hair but i membered it wusnt gonna be round much longer an da fifth seared down da length of my bak, he had caught me at da nape of da neck an dragged it down ta da small of my bak.

i wus breathin heavily now an dere wus sweat but it wus over. da next stroke caught me by surprise, da lash wus so hard i broke position an straightened up, my left arm behind me, touchin wut i shudnt be touchin. more fire an i wus groanin but Master wus dere, da whip in my face an i leaned forward ta litely kiss it.

as soon as my lips touched da whip dose two guards grabbed me an i wus dragged thru da hallways down ta da barber. dere wus a man standin dere an da two guards jus stopped an held me tight as da man grabbed my hair an started cuttin. now i wus screamin an pleadin, dey were cuttin my hair. dis wusnt a mistake, it wus real, dis wusnt gettin put bak like nutin happened. i wus cryin now, even if Master wus dere i cudnt help myself, it wus all gone an da guards wudnt let go ta let me see how short my hair wus. da Barber put my cut hair on da table in fronta me, it was long an still tied in da bands i kept it in, Master wud get a lotta money fer dat.

i got cufffed by wunna da guard, i had kicked him strugglin an he didnt like dat. so i wus dazed as dey carried me bak up ta Master's office an dumped me back on da carpet. i wus still cryin so i ignored Master, mebbe ifn i didnt see him or pretended dat he wusnt dere dis didnt count as makin me cry.

"A slave may not lie. Get out." he said ta me an i sobbed as i crawled on hands an knees over ta my clothes, searchin fer my buttons. seven small wuns fer my shirt an wun big wun fer my skirt. he let me search fer em, dey were scattered an i cudnt help but cry as i picked up each little wun. i got em all an den left da office witout lookin at Master. as i got ta da hallway da guards went bak da way dey came an i wus lone.

i ran fer Penelope an threw myself inta her arms, she wus waitin fer me wit all da other girls. sumwun had seen a dey were ready fer me. i cried on Portia while Penelope got out her needle an thread, goin ta work on my present.

no wun said a thin when i cried myself ta sleep.

Part 2

I could hear the tears in Nadine?s voice as she responded to Gun?s question, ?yes master?

Gun wiped her eyes, and for the moment, there was a tenderness in his voice I was glad to hear, ?Ok, I believe you now. I believe you'd do anything for Alae.?

I managed to turn about and gently take her in her arms. I had to be careful to try not to touch her where he hadn't struck, and was grateful that she didn?t cringe. Instead she actually hugged me in return, ?i wus brave fer ya. i didnt let him know ya did it.?

?I only hope that I someday learn to be half as brave as you.?

She then told us how Brutin had had her hair cut to create the fund. Then an old acquaintance stopped by, and the world seemed to have a chance to brighten a little more for her once again.

He had come looking for someone named Lyllianne. Obviously they had frequented the Kurii before. Nadine had been so upset she mistook him for someone else and identified him by the wrong name. That had gotten me to thinking and soon I found that box of bows, ribbons, hair ties, and other things to make a girl look just a little more dressy than usual. Of course, once Scarab was finished, it really wasn?t necessary, he had her hair really pretty.

Fortunately he had also healed my foot. That made it easier to get about, but also where I didn?t have to hide to avoid questions.

Then the night?s visitors started to arrive. Amongst them was Verishia. When I had first met her, I had avoided her for the chance that she could see deeper thoughts than I wished her to know. This night, however, I chose something different.

It started with Gun settling behind me and massaging my shoulders while he and Fleet talked.

As Verishia took her usual seat, Gun started things off, ?Good evening hon.?

This caused Verishia to pause, and as she looked at Gun, she seemed taken back by it, ?Did you just....never mind. Hello Gun.?

There was the opening needed, and I couldn?t pass it up, ?Did he call you hon??

Aside from me, I think she probably blushes faster than anyone else, ?Yes. Why??

I love it when Gun plays into it, whether it is he and Nadine teaming up on me, or as tonight, his joining me in teasing someone else, it?s always fun, ?That blushing must be contagious.?

I had to smile, ?Yes it is.?

Verishia had to ask, ?I don't understand that comment, what does that mean??

Gun explained it, of course, ?Blushing contagious... well... Alae blushes alot too. I think it's very pretty and becoming of her.? As he gave his explanation I turned the chair around that Nadine had been using earlier and patted it. She wasn?t going to be there long, not long at all. Rishi had her first kiss, and I had someone new to watch. Do-gooders could be so much trouble, and Jen was obviously going to prove to be of the worst kind.

I found myself being weighed by thoughts and not sure how to proceed. So many choices and directions to go and I?m finding that sometimes the best path is not always easy to determine. Sometimes we need to listen to our own instincts on a matter. Sometimes we need to hear another voice?s counsel.

This night I needed to hear a counsel of one I was finding I had come to trust. Many would say that he was a monster. I was slowly finding that behind the wolf?s smile there was a man.

This evening, though, I wasn?t really sure I would be received. I was both surprised and pleased to find that his door was still opened to me, especially considering our last conversation at the Kurii. The night Nadine and I were finally betrayed by Gun.

He invited me to talk to him and ask him my question. So it began. ?If Gun had simply come to you and leveled his complaint but not asked for a punishment would you have considered Nadine's behavior deserving of punishment??

This started a lengthy conversation centered around a conversation Gun had had with Nadine. I found that on so many different things I agreed with him or at least the way that things should have been done. One thing bothered me, however. Gun had asked her a question, and she had answered it honestly. For this she was to be punished.

That a thing can be done doesn?t make it the right thing to do. On the other hand, sometimes undoing a thing wasn?t the right thing to do either.

How far does betrayal go before it finally completely destroys the love of the one betrayed? At what point can the sins no longer be forgiven?

As we spoke, my mind went back to the night I stood in the doorway of the Kurii and listened to Gun and Nadine speaking. One part more than anything caught my attention. I didn?t know exactly what he spoke of, and found later it was a game. I?ll probably have to find out what the game is about to better understand.

For now, though, I did understand masks and hiding intent and purpose. I did understand that he was putting on one face while I was there, and one while he thought I was not. ?If we were playing a game of poker, and I could give away what was in my cards every time you looked at my face, that wouldn't make me a good player. That's too bad. I guess I'm just dangerous then and have to live with the choices I make.?

Brutin?s next words brought me back to the present and if had been possible to anger me more, I?m not sure how, ?He cut her hair, damaging my property because he went too far.? I knew her hair had been cut, but in that moment, I couldn?t remember anyone telling me that he had been the one to do it. He had pretended to be so concerned when we had come in and he had seen her hair cut to pay for the repairs to windows.

I had taken that at face value. Yet now, it seemed even that had been a lie. He had told so many, that the truth was no longer a part of him and he was taking offense at it being told to him.

Our conversation then turned to others as well and subtleties of definitions that seemed to escape simple observations. I?m finding that the more I am given a chance to see, the less I understand, and the more I want to learn.

As the conversation turned to the lengthening of the punishment my thoughts went to a part of the conversation that had been later the evening I saw Gun?s willingness to wear masks.

?He had a choice. Send Nadine away and have you for himself. Reaffirming that she is a slave. Or kowtowing to make you happy because you loved her. He made his choice, and suffered.?

I had told him honestly that he could not take from me one who was of my heart. It is not the way that I was taught. It is not the way of the people born to this world. What is of the heart, is of the heart and never to be removed. Now it seemed he was willing to test that way. One cannot removed one of the heart. But being one of the heart, one can choose to walk away or destroy that portion that is gifted with jealousy and rage.

We spoke and Brutin gave his reasons for allowing this punishment to continue, and convinced me to follow a different path. Though it had not felt right at first, it did now.

Sometimes you allow the snake to strike at you as you watch so that what it hits something other than your heel.

It was morning...

Seated at his desk, he looked to the empty spot where the crib he had built for a future child once resided...

There were things that needed to be said...

Resolved to the face that he had been pushed out of the picture, Gunther still felt deep within his soul that he had to say something to her even if it fell on deaf ears...

He walked outside, and went to the Garden hoping to find her.