It should have been the monitors that woke her with their insistent beeping, or maybe the nurses that came and went. Instead it was the steady glare of Jacks that woke her to full consciousness. She didn?t open her eyes, not right off, she wanted to gather at least some of her wits before she had to deal with the man. His stare felt like it was boring a hole through her head, maybe that?s what Trent Reznor was experiencing when he wrote the song?
?I know you are awake.? His deep baritone was muted, there must be other people nearby, and edged, he was gods awful mad.
?I know you do Jacks. Just wanted to gather myself a bit because we all know that apologizing ain?t exactly one of my strengths.? Her voice sounded weak and that surprised her nearly as much as the pain that shot through the left side of her face when she moved it.
?Your cheekbone is cracked. From your expression I gather the pain medications have worn off.? He didn?t move to get her more, he was not interested in easing her pain. His ice-blue eyes were fixed on her face, his expression flat and cold. ?You do not think that will suffice, do you??
It was fair. If anyone she?d cared about had been so colossally stubborn or stupid she wouldn?t have let them get away with just that. ?I know I was wrong, Jacks. I shouldn?t?ve sent your guys away. I?d say what I was thinking but it obviously wasn?t of the right things.? She peered over his shoulder and saw unfamiliar faces. ?New guards? You didn?t fire the other guys, it wasn?t their fault.?
He held up a hand to quiet her and for a miracle it worked. ?You were brought to a hospital where knights watch. Harper was the one that got you lifted here.? He paused and then there was something added to his tone that said this next part she really deserved for her transgressions. ?After Ford and Colt found you.?
She knew her face tried to do something because it hurt like hell. ?Ford...and Colt... which means my whole family. What...what do they think happened?? What the hell was she going to tell them? The truth? Gods no, that would put them in danger. Had she already done that by not telling them enough. ?Damnit.? There was more on the tip of her tongue but when she looked at Jacks there was something in his gaze that stopped her and made her change the words. ?Jacks, I really am sorry. I know I?m impossible. I?m a pain and a stubborn, selfish, prideful fool.?
His hand moved faster than her eye could follow and was clutching her wrist in a grip just shy of painful. ?Do not do that again. Promise me Summer. Promise me you will not compromise your security again. And use words that you will not twist. Promise me or I am going to hand off the assignment to someone else.?
She?d wounded him a lot deeper than she'd thought and that was far more painful than a cracked bone. This was part of the reason she had so much trouble letting people get close, and why all the wounds she?d taken in the Void or otherwise were nothing but something to endure until they healed; physical wounds did that, they healed, the emotional ones?
?Jacks.? She moved her free hand to rest on top of his and gently squeezed. ?I promise I will try my best not to put you in this position again. I don?t want to cause you or anyone else to worry about me, I just...? Was inept at being a proper human girl? Would do better if she were made of wood and had someone tugging her strings? ?I can?t stop being who I am but I can try not to keep putting up barricades against the people I care about.?
Jacks was silent as he mulled over her response. ?You drive me toward the cliffs of insanity far too often, Summer. It is alright to admit that people care for you and to keep that in mind before you do something stupid.?
?Yeah, I get that. You should hire yourself a giant to help you climb those cliffs, or a man in black. But... I?m about to unplug these machines and find a way to get back to my house. So...? It wasn?t smart, but the last thing she wanted was to be in a hospital. She?d done a quick inventory of her state and she was weak -- dehydration she figured -- and in a bit of pain in her face, just a cracked cheekbone, and her side, the stitches would have been redone, and decided none of that required an extended stay in this place.
?No.? Flatly stated, commanding.
?Oh yeah, yeah, Jacks. And you know that I mean what I say. You can either help me get back to my house and set me up with the proper post-hospital care or... I will wait until sunrise and do it then, with the guards with me, but still... will be going home.?
He growled at her, feeling his temper rise, but also realizing that this was her way of keeping him in charge, if only vaguely. ?You are going to tell your cousins about what you do?? He said even as he shot off a text to a few people and hit the button for a nurse; if the machines and IV were going to come out he?d prefer it be done by a professional and not Summer just tearing them free.
?Been trying to tell them for awhile. Just isn?t something that is easy to explain and I haven?t really gotten the ride-along to the Void down. Without showing people what it is there is no real sense of why anyone would want it badly enough to do something like... this.? A wave of her hand to indicate her face.
?You should try harder. You all should. For a family that is so close you keep a lot of secrets.? He said, acknowledging the fact that Summer wasn?t the only one holding out. He could understand to a point, he had abandoned his family rather than tell them what he had become.
She made no response, there wasn?t one required. Her thoughts turned to getting out of the hospital, that was first on the list, the rest of it could follow when she was home.
?I know you are awake.? His deep baritone was muted, there must be other people nearby, and edged, he was gods awful mad.
?I know you do Jacks. Just wanted to gather myself a bit because we all know that apologizing ain?t exactly one of my strengths.? Her voice sounded weak and that surprised her nearly as much as the pain that shot through the left side of her face when she moved it.
?Your cheekbone is cracked. From your expression I gather the pain medications have worn off.? He didn?t move to get her more, he was not interested in easing her pain. His ice-blue eyes were fixed on her face, his expression flat and cold. ?You do not think that will suffice, do you??
It was fair. If anyone she?d cared about had been so colossally stubborn or stupid she wouldn?t have let them get away with just that. ?I know I was wrong, Jacks. I shouldn?t?ve sent your guys away. I?d say what I was thinking but it obviously wasn?t of the right things.? She peered over his shoulder and saw unfamiliar faces. ?New guards? You didn?t fire the other guys, it wasn?t their fault.?
He held up a hand to quiet her and for a miracle it worked. ?You were brought to a hospital where knights watch. Harper was the one that got you lifted here.? He paused and then there was something added to his tone that said this next part she really deserved for her transgressions. ?After Ford and Colt found you.?
She knew her face tried to do something because it hurt like hell. ?Ford...and Colt... which means my whole family. What...what do they think happened?? What the hell was she going to tell them? The truth? Gods no, that would put them in danger. Had she already done that by not telling them enough. ?Damnit.? There was more on the tip of her tongue but when she looked at Jacks there was something in his gaze that stopped her and made her change the words. ?Jacks, I really am sorry. I know I?m impossible. I?m a pain and a stubborn, selfish, prideful fool.?
His hand moved faster than her eye could follow and was clutching her wrist in a grip just shy of painful. ?Do not do that again. Promise me Summer. Promise me you will not compromise your security again. And use words that you will not twist. Promise me or I am going to hand off the assignment to someone else.?
She?d wounded him a lot deeper than she'd thought and that was far more painful than a cracked bone. This was part of the reason she had so much trouble letting people get close, and why all the wounds she?d taken in the Void or otherwise were nothing but something to endure until they healed; physical wounds did that, they healed, the emotional ones?
?Jacks.? She moved her free hand to rest on top of his and gently squeezed. ?I promise I will try my best not to put you in this position again. I don?t want to cause you or anyone else to worry about me, I just...? Was inept at being a proper human girl? Would do better if she were made of wood and had someone tugging her strings? ?I can?t stop being who I am but I can try not to keep putting up barricades against the people I care about.?
Jacks was silent as he mulled over her response. ?You drive me toward the cliffs of insanity far too often, Summer. It is alright to admit that people care for you and to keep that in mind before you do something stupid.?
?Yeah, I get that. You should hire yourself a giant to help you climb those cliffs, or a man in black. But... I?m about to unplug these machines and find a way to get back to my house. So...? It wasn?t smart, but the last thing she wanted was to be in a hospital. She?d done a quick inventory of her state and she was weak -- dehydration she figured -- and in a bit of pain in her face, just a cracked cheekbone, and her side, the stitches would have been redone, and decided none of that required an extended stay in this place.
?No.? Flatly stated, commanding.
?Oh yeah, yeah, Jacks. And you know that I mean what I say. You can either help me get back to my house and set me up with the proper post-hospital care or... I will wait until sunrise and do it then, with the guards with me, but still... will be going home.?
He growled at her, feeling his temper rise, but also realizing that this was her way of keeping him in charge, if only vaguely. ?You are going to tell your cousins about what you do?? He said even as he shot off a text to a few people and hit the button for a nurse; if the machines and IV were going to come out he?d prefer it be done by a professional and not Summer just tearing them free.
?Been trying to tell them for awhile. Just isn?t something that is easy to explain and I haven?t really gotten the ride-along to the Void down. Without showing people what it is there is no real sense of why anyone would want it badly enough to do something like... this.? A wave of her hand to indicate her face.
?You should try harder. You all should. For a family that is so close you keep a lot of secrets.? He said, acknowledging the fact that Summer wasn?t the only one holding out. He could understand to a point, he had abandoned his family rather than tell them what he had become.
She made no response, there wasn?t one required. Her thoughts turned to getting out of the hospital, that was first on the list, the rest of it could follow when she was home.