A small package arrives with a black envelope taped to the top of it. It has a picture of a gold rose and a heart on the cover. It is addressed to Lirssa Sarengrave.
Hi Lirssa!
It's me!
Aunt Tara!
YAY!
Fourteen is a great age to be, take it from me! I was married, had my first child, and lived in a big castle at fourteen! When I wasn't trying to hang myself from the portcullis to escape the lunatic I was forced to marry (his name was Jaron, by the way), I was throwing myself off the castle roof or down the stairs only to learn that being a child of an elf and a vampire?
My neck couldn't break!
Yeah, so that sucked, but you know, they say that it is better to have tried and failed, than to never have tried at all! I have no regrets.
Anyway, after I stabbed the psychopath a few dozen times with my Daddy's dagger and he bled to death all over my favorite pink dress, I escaped with my brother Tarathiele and we came here, to Rhy'Din! Yeah! I was the same age you are now when I first arrived here. I didn't know anyone or have a pot to piss in!
I'll never forget that first night, laying in that sheep meadow, underneath the great big sky, lamenting over the fact that my life up until that point was an utter failure, only to wake up and learn that my clothes had been stolen in the middle of the night by some pervert and was forced to wear a barrel for a few days until my brother could find me suitable clothing.
I remember thinking "Gee whiz, I barely escape that jerk husband of mine with my life and now I'm naked! What a world I live in!"
Tarathiele came through for me, though! He had to steal me some clothes from the tailor who wasn't very happy since Rhy'Dinians in those days weren't as generous as they are now, but you know, that's OK. It built my character! Made me who I am today! Your Aunt!
Yes, people stared at me and made fun of me but you know I made those bastards pay a few years later, when, at just sixteen, I became a vampire, an' ate them and their entire families! And to think....just two years earlier I was forever worrying where my next meal was going to come from! Now I have so many choices, I feel like I'm living in one of
those restaurants that offer a buffet option every night!
And the best part about it is, it's free!
Like I always say, if it's free it's for me!
Everyone in the Inferno is REAL excited it's your birthday. They're all so sorry they can't come, though. See, when you live the life of a sinner and are eternally damned because of it, you're sorta screwed and can't go nowhere. If it were not for that and the chains embedded in their flesh, they would definitely be at your party! Honest!
However, Geryon is going to deliver the presents I got for you to your home. He's allowed to leave. You remember him, right? He's the big monster with wings that almost swallowed Rekah whole the night he brought baby Razzle Dazzle's limb crib to the house?
Yep! That's the one! He told me to tell you he says happy birthday. He'd say it himself but he only speaks Demon and not Common like you or I and I'm thinking you aren't going to understand a damn word he is saying so it is just best if I tell you instead.
I've made a scrapbook with pictures of the presents I purchased for you so you can see what you're getting! I hope you like them! I'm going to try real hard to be at your party but the work of the Whore of Babylon is never done, so I may miss it! If I'm not there, please don't be sad! I'll see you again soon!
Well, I have to go whip a few sinners into submission and hang a few others on some meathooks, so I better go now.
I love you, sweetie! I'm just so very proud of you! Fourteen! Wow! This is such an exciting time! I hope your life is as blessed as mine has been!
Happy happy birthday!
Love N Kisses,
Your Aunt Tara
(( I posted an album of the present pics to my FB profile. You should be able to see them here. ))